Some of the most poisonous people come disguised as a family. People pretend you're a bad person so they don't feel guilty about the things they did to you. Just take my uncle as an example.

Early this morning my father's younger brother came knocking on our doors. Umma was the one that went out to see what he wanted, she came back with puffy eyes to inform me that he's asking for me.

No matter how she denies it, I know he made her cry. He dared made my mom cry! As if what his brother did to her isn't enough. Even if she won't tell me I know that Alhaji Buhari's younger brothers blame her for his disappearance. Astagafurillah, but the things I want to do to those men.

I begrudgingly went to see what he wanted on Umma's insistence. I don't understand why she still respects them, because honestly, I've stopped seeing them as respectable people. The only reason I tolerate them is because of my grandparents— May Allah grant them Jannatul Firdaus, it's not their fault they ended up with those men as children.

Do you know what that man said to me? That he wants me to stop working because it is bringing 'shame' to their family. Having his niece working as a maid is spoiling his reputation as he wants to run for chairman in the upcoming election.

He had the nerves and gut to look me in the eye and— in his words 'command' me to stop working. This is the same man that hasn't—up till today sent anything in the name of help since his excuse of a brother left. He wasn't concerned about our wellbeing, our education, or anything, and today, he is asking me to stop earning my halal, my sweat, and blood.

I of course refused, who is he to tell me what to do? For four years, I have been taking care of my mother, my sister, and myself all alone. I was just sixteen years old then and my sister was just two years old. He must be high on something for him to think that I'll stop working. As far as I am concerned, I am not doing anything inappropriate or haram, and if my mother has given her consent and blessings then nobody and I repeat nobody can make me stop except if I decide otherwise.

We had a big and heated argument, he ended up leaving angrily not before saying 'If I was the one that had you as a daughter and your mother as a wife, I'd also leave. Times like this I don't blame my brother for freeing himself from people like you. Allah wadarai!'

And you call these type of people family? Being a family is determined more by behavior than blood.

When I told Umma, she said I should go and apologize as he is my uncle and he's still family. I hate it when people say 'they are still your family' just because someone is your family doesn't mean you have to keep them in your life if they are toxic. Blood means nothing sometimes. Don't let people guilt you into being in contact with someone who isn't good for your mental health. Toxic family members are like roaches, you need pest control to assist you with getting rid of them.

You are allowed to terminate your relationship with toxic family members. You are allowed to walk away from people who hurt you. You don't owe anyone an explanation for taking care of you.

I snatched my hijab and went out to go to my grandparents' house. I am not going to apologize to him, I am going to go inform Dada before Alhaji Sabi'u does. God knows what he'll tell him.

So here I am in a taxi on my way to Dada's. About five minutes later the taxi stopped, I paid the driver and hopped off. I saw some men in front of the house seated on mats. I greeted them first then went inside. As I was leaving, my ears overhead one of them talking.

"....she is Buhari's daughter, the one Sabi'u was talking about...ehn she does look like those strong-headed people. He should just get her married if he wants her to stop working... I am willing to add another one...." They laughed and high fived him.

I just shook my head and continued walking. I first went to my grandma's room but she wasn't there, I was informed she was with Dada. Good, they are together.

"Assalamu alaikum," I knocked on the door. Dada's voice answered and he told me to come inside. "Ahh Hauwa'u ce, shigo, shigo."

Dada is sitting on a rocking chair pulling beads as usual and Goggo is sitting on the floor, sorting somethings out. I admire my grandparents so much, their relationship is honestly amazing. They got married while they were very young, the journey of life definitely wasn't easy but here they are stronger than ever. Their relationship is more solid than some newlyweds these days, I used to pray for this kind of relationship once upon a time but not anymore.....

Goggo smiled at me and ushered me in. I walked straight into her open arms. My grandmother is so beautiful, her glowing skin can put youth to shame. I always wished I looked exactly like her, I do have some features from her like my nose and lips then and my face shape exactly like his.

"How are you Maijidda?" Goggo asked after pulling away.

"I'm fine Alhamdulillah." I smiled at her. "Dada ina wuni." I turned to my grandfather.

"Lafiya lau Hauwa'u, kowa lafiya dai ko? Hope everyone is fine."

"We are all fine Dada Alhamdulillah," I sucked in a deep breath. "Dada I came here to inform you of what happened between Alhaji Sabi'u and me....." I explained the situation to them to the best of my capability. ".......and by Allah Dada that isn't possible," I concluded.

Dada sighed heavily whilst using both palms to wipe his face. He suddenly looks like he aged a thousand years. Wallahi Azeem what his children are doing, they'll surely be questioned on it.

"Hauwa'u," he called. "Even I don't like the fact that you're working while your father and grandparents are still alive but this is beyond me. I always wished I had some sort of means to protect you, your sister, and mother but I don't have anything," he paused and dropped his head in shame. "nothing at all. I feel useless."

"Dada," I called out in a soft tone, I crawled forward and took hold of his hands. "don't you ever say that Dada, ever. You're not useless."

"But Maijidda...."

I shook my head. "No more Dada please." I pleaded and he sighed softly.

There was a time Dada was so ill, we started losing hope. The hospital bills took everything he had. Alhamdulillah though, he got better and hearty but from then he had close to nothing. His sons take care of him now, not as they should mind you.

"Hauwa'u you go and continue with your work, you have our blessings. Allah maki albarka." Dada spoke with a sad smile on his face.

"Ameen Ameen," I answered with a smile. I spent about an hour with my grandparents, we teased and pulled each other's legs.

"I'll get going," I said. Goggo frowned. "So soon?" I chuckled. "I promise I'll visit again, next time I'll bring Rumana."

"Don't forget, and your mother too." Goggo smiled. Umma rarely comes to this house now, she comes on important occasions like Eid or when one of them is ill but apart from that she hardly does. She likes being hypocritical though, she's always sending us here.

"I won't in sha Allah. Se anjima." I said goodbye to my grandparents and left. I walked back home, it gave me chance to think. I made a mental calculation of all the things I have to take care of. I know for sure that soon Ruu's school will start demanding the school-fees.

Ya Allah!

I met a black Range Rover parked in front of our house. Who could it be? I asked myself but I came up with nothing.

Perhaps it's........

No! No! No! He wouldn't dare!

With my heart in my throat I walked inside, the car's empty. I hurriedly ambulated inside, I heard Umma's voice and that of a lady I'm not able to recognize.

"Assalamu alaikum," I said as I entered. "Sa'adah?!" I echoed in confusion as I saw my employer's daughter sitting down on the mat that decorated our tiny living room.

"Jiddarh," Sa'adah shrieked happily, standing up to hug me. That earned her a confused smile from me. I eyed Umma, what's going on?! I asked her with my eyes, she just shrugged.

Sa'adah pulled away after a couple of seconds. "I came to check on you, how's your foot?"

"It's alright, Alhamdulillah," I answered and took a seat. "I'll leave you girls alone," Umma said. Sa'adah smiled at Umma. "Toh Umma, Nagode; thank you." Umma nodded and walked out.

The atmosphere became a bit tense and awkward, I played with my fingers, something I do when I'm nervous or anxious. "So uhm did your mother send you? I promise I'll return to work tomorrow, yau dinma something came up that's why."

"Jiddarh calm down," she chuckled. "Mommy doesn't even know I'm here."

I furrowed my eyebrows. "Then why are you here?" When the smile on Sa'adah's face fell I realized just how blunt I was. "I mean—

"—it's okay, I know it's surprising to see me here. But I really wanted to see how you're doing, I wasn't able to that day and uhh I kinda don't have your number."

I gave her a tight-lipped smile. "That's nice of you, thank you." It became awkward again because I didn't know what to say. This is the first time I'm having a guest in a while apart from Humaira and Anisa, during my early teen years my social cycle used to be wide, oh how things have changed. And with Sa'adah it's ten times more difficult, don't get me wrong I adore the girl and I consider her as a close friend but.....

"Jiddarh," a voice called halting my thoughts. "Huh?" I looked up.
Sa'adah looks like she has something really important to say but doesn't know where to begin, I heard mumbling to herself here goes nothing.

"Why do you like keeping me at arm's length?" She blurted. I blinked once, twice in surprise. "Excuse me?"

"Jiddarh, you like pushing me away. You say you consider me as a friend but you do exactly the opposite. Jiddarh, I like you but I feel like I'm forcing myself onto you."

Oh my God!

"Sa'adah it isn't that way..." I started to explain.

"— I know," she smiled sadly. "I know you keep me pushing away because of my mother," she bit her lower lip. "I know."

Like I was saying earlier, I adore Sa'adah but the problem is that I don't want trouble with her mother, I try as hard as I can to stay away from anything that'll make Hajiya annoyed or angry, and sadly Sa'adah is one of them. Her mother doesn't like how she's fond of me. That's why I don't treat her like a friend should be treated, we don't have each other's number and I don't let her visit me—though she insisted times without number I end up coming with one excuse or the other.

I do this only because of her mother, Hajiya can be cruel when she wants to be, sadly, and unfortunately, I depend on the salary she pays me.

"I'm sorry," I said because that's the only thing I can come up with. "I-I...."

"—you don't have to explain Jiddarh," she placed her hand on top of mine. "I just...I look up to you in a way." My eyes widened. "I know it seems shocking. By Allah, I look up to you, you're so courageous and so strong."

I didn't know what to say. If only she knew the circumstances that made me this way.

"Jiddarh do you know I had to live—still is—in my sister's shadow all my life, my cousin even. My mother always pressures me to be like my sister, she pushes me away because I don't bring the senator's son or that particular billionaires' son. And by Allah, it's frustrating. It gets me wondering if there's something wrong with me. Most people befriend me just to be close to my sister. You're the one that treats me as me. Not as Alhaji Hameed's daughter or as the Lubna Hameed's sister.

And-and I just totally love you for that. You have no idea how much it means, when I'm outside I feel like I don't have an identity of my own."

I am rendered speechless, sometimes the prettiest smile hides the most pain. I pulled her in for a hug, that's the only thing I could think of.

"You're a wonderful person Sa'adah and for those that don't see it, it's their loss. Don't be what you're told to be, follow your path. Be your person, don't get held down by everyone else. You'll never be your own person or find your happiness if you allow your parents/friends to dictate your young adult life, do things that make you happy as long as it isn't disobeying shari'a and no one gets hurt in the process."

She looked at me with tear-filled eyes. I used my palm to wipe her tears, shaking my head in the process. "Stop comparing yourself to others, you are YOU. Nobody else could be YOU even if they tried to be. YOU are unique and beautiful, nobody else is YOU. Do you hear me?"

Sa'adah nodded her head. "Thank you Jiddarh, thank you." I grinned. "What are friends for?" If it's possible, she got more emotional, "This might make me sound like a loner or a loser but you're the only true friend I have."

"Sa'adah," I whined. "I'm sorry I never knew you felt that way. I just, I didn't want anything that will cause a problem between your mother and me."

"I understand." Sa'adah smiled. "Come let's go," she said standing up.

I gave her a confused look. "Go where?"

"We are going out," she squealed. I started to protest but Sa'adah shushed me, literally. "No buts, I've already asked Umma for permission and she said yes. And I know that you don't have anything to do, Umma confirmed that, so come on Jiddarh."

I sighed knowing I didn't have any other choice. I told Sa'adah to wait while I changed.

Ya Allah, we're going out together but where? What am I going to wear? I don't want to embarrass her, I mean look at me and look at her.

This is a bad idea.

Maybe I should just go and come up with an excuse. No, I've done enough of that. Ya Allah, what do I do?

I opened my wardrobe and stood akimbo as I looked at the little clothes I own. I sighed and pulled the only clothing I think will do, it's a multi-colored Ankara sewn into a boubou. I bought it for myself a year ago for eid. That was the last time I bought clothes for myself, so so many months ago. It'll have to do, it's the prettiest thing I have.

I wore it and dusted my face with powder, that's the only thing I have that can be classified as makeup. I don't buy that anymore, it's a waste of money.

I paired the clothes with a maroon veil—it matches— and an old black wedge I own. Hoping and praying to God that it's okay I went out. "Ready?" I called.

Sa'adah's gaze left her phone when she heard me. "You look pretty."

I held back an eye roll and just smiled. "How do you look so good bare-faced," Sa'adah whined. "I mean look at you, you're not even trying and you look better than me. Natural beauty."

I laughed out loud. "You don't know what you're saying."

"It's the truth. I mean look at you ko kwalli baki sa ba fah, you did not even apply kohl."

"Let's go," I walked out and she followed suit. She hoped on the driver seat and I sat down in the passenger seat. She turned on the ignition and the AC blasted. "Where are we going?" I asked. Sa'adah glanced at me sideways. "Guess we'll have to wait and see."

I knew she wouldn't tell. Almost fifty minutes later, Sa'adah parked the car. Kano's traffic is a nightmare.

Ado Bayero shopping mall.....

"What are we doing here?"

Sa'adah rolled her eyes. "Shopping duh."

What?! "Oh okay, you go in, I'll wait for you."

She threw me a look that says are you crazy. "What do you mean you'll wait for me, common we're going together."

"But—

"—I don't want to hear anything." She alighted the car before I could complete my sentence.

I don't have money... I whispered to myself.

I released a breath and exited the car. I stood beside Sa'adah as she mumbled incoherently to herself. "What is it?"

"I think I forgot my credit card at home," she said sheepishly.

"Ohh," I didn't know what to say.

"But don't worry, I'll quickly call my brother he's somewhere nearby." She said opening her purse. "We should just go back," I suggested.

But she has already dialed and was already speaking on the phone. "Ya Baffa, please bring your credit card for me, I'm here in Ado Bayero Mall...with a friend. Danallah mana, ban san ya akayi ba.....Okay, thank you. Eh ban shiga ba, you're the best."

Sa'adah completed the call before tucking her phone away in her bag. "That way you can meet him," she squealed. "honestly I just don't get how you guys haven't met, it's been months." I just shrugged. I don't know either, I just go to the house do my work and leave.

I guess I'm meeting the not so famous Ya Baffa.

We stood for about five minutes, Sa'adah kept tapping her shoes on the concrete floor. "He said he'll be here in a minute," she said in exasperation. "What's taking him long?"

I shrugged my shoulders, Ya Rabb I'm tired of standing. I suddenly realized that I left my purse in the car, we are sitting outside under a tree. "Sa'adah give me the car key I forgot my purse." She said okay and gave me the keys.

As I closed the car lid I saw a familiar face, oh Allah please don't let him see me please, please. I desperately pleaded to God. I looked straight ahead as we passed each other, I was mentally squealing but it was short-lived.

"You really thought that I wouldn't see you? Hmm, Jay?"

If you ignore him he'll go away, don't turn back Jiddarh.

"Feisty," he yelled as I walked away. "Jay I'm talking to you."

Ya Allah why me?! What's this? Coincidence? What?

I started speed walking and all of a sudden he was right in front of me. I halted quickly if not we would have collided. "What's wrong with you?!" I snapped. He just smiled widely showing his teeth.

"You never get tired of masipa ne wai?"

What the— I don't have time for this nonsense.

I side-stepped him and walked away. Thank Allah he did not follow me, wow that's a first.

I met Sa'adah pacing as she glanced around. Ya Allah, I kept her waiting. "Sorry," I said when I reached where she's standing. "I kind of got lost." Wow, see how that lie easily rolled off your tongue.

She hummed. "Figured," She then raised her phone. "I kind of don't have your number, would have called you." I suddenly felt bad. "Give me the phone," I input my number and flashed so that I'll have her number too.

Sa'adah beamed at me. "Thank you," she then frowned. "You didn't meet Ya Baffa," she pouted. "And he immediately entered his car so you wouldn't have seen him." I just rolled my eyes. Sa'adah smacked my arm. "Stop doing that." I giggled.

I'm never escorting Sa'adah to the mall ever again, ever. It was like she was going to buy the whole mall, and Inna lillahi she's sooo indecisive at one point I felt like banging my head on the wall.

After spending about two hours—which felt like a lifetime— jumping from one store to the other, we went to the cafeteria and after that the cinema.

If you hold me at gunpoint and ask what the movie was about I won't be able to say a thing. It was so confusing and at one point Sa'adah was crying, I just don't get it, I was like 'What the hell?'

Right now we're parked in front of my house. I turned around in my seat to look at Sa'adah. "Thank you so much I had fun." I smiled. Sa'adah smiled back and hugged me, oou okay. "No thank you Jiddodo, I had fun so thanks." I patted her back. "You're welcome."

I alighted the car, she did the same. Sa'adah opened the boot and came out with almost all of the things she bought. What is she going to do?

She handed me the bags. No. I shook my head continuously. "No please, I can't accept those."

Sa'adah glared at me. "Jiddarh ki ansa."

"Wallahi I cannot do that," I shook my head.

"Even the prophet peace be upon him said not to turn down a gift."

"Not this kind."

She breathed a laugh then schooled her expression. "Wallahi if you don't collect I'm leaving it here."

I gave her a 'you're crazy' look.

"Wallahi I'm serious, kinji na rantse."

I reluctantly collected, not because I wanted to. I absolutely despise charity.

"We're friends right?" She asked softly. I nodded with a barely-there smile.

"Then don't take this as anything but as a friend gifting one of her closest friends." She smiled. "Thank you," I said a bit emotionally. "Won't you come in?"

"I'd love too but Ya Baffa has been bombarding my phone with calls and messages, his credit card but another time I promise," she explained. "Don't worry you'll be seeing me here so much that you will pursue me away." She added with a laugh.

"No haba, bye." She waved and entered her car, I didn't go in till her car disappeared out of sight.

I smiled to myself and went inside. I showed Umma the generosity Sa'adah did for us. There are about five gowns with their veil of my size, then three of Umma's size, jeans, skirts, gowns, and t-shirts for Rumana. She even bought a Classic Makeup kit, for me I guess. Then packets of chocolates and biscuits. There are also foodstuffs like milk, sugar, cereal, seasonings, spaghetti, macaroni, couscous, noodles, oil, etc. I didn't even notice when she bought all those.

"Allah yawa yarinyan nan albarka, May Allah bless her." Umma prayed with a smile on her face. "Ameen," I safely tucked everything away then retired to my room.

I laid on my bed and picked the small Nokia phone I own, that type that has a touch light. I dialed Sa'dah's phone number. "Hey, Jiddarh!" She answered.

"Hello Sa'adah, I—"

"—Please don't," she cut me off. "I know what you're going to say and you don't have to, so please and please I beg of you, don't say anything." I released a huge sigh. "Tohm shikenan, thank you. Allah kara budi, Nagode."

"Jiddarh!" She whined. "I thought I said you should be quiet."

"You know I have to," I said in a solemn voice.

"Are you coming tomorrow?" She asked, I get what she's trying to do. "Yeah, I will come in sha Allah."

"Okay then, I'll see you tomorrow?"

"Hopefully, bye." She said bye too and hanged up. I looked down at the phone in my hand and smiled.

Sigh, I love Sa'adah😍😍

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Yours truly
Memzyb ✨🌹