From : Shaurya (drshauryasinghmohan@remail.com)

To : Manjiri (manjirirao@mail4me.com)

Cc:

Subject : Sincerely putting my best foot forward and making the most of it.

My silly Silly Head,

Words fail to capture the depth of emotion that fills my heart as I sit down to write this letter. I am overwhelmed with emotions, and I find it impossible not to express them.

You made me dream when I basically observed, Manjiri.

You caused me to execute when I essentially thought.

You caused me to tune in when I basically heard.

You made me live every minute when I essentially existed.

Much obliged to you.

Truly!

Deeply!

Affectionately!

How can someone go through pain just to bring the other joy?

I always used to wonder this. Not gonna lie, but all this painful stuff was beyond my interest, understanding or whatever you call it. I don't even know what am I typing. Anyways, you must have got it already what I'm trying to say. I mean write. No, I mean type. So let's just move forward.

Whatever!

I literally suck at this. I'm unable to type a few simple sentences.

Like seriously?

Lemme just take a quick stroll around the hospital and I'll continue with a refreshed mind. Cause I really want to write this. It's almost half past three at night and I'm unable to sleep with these surging emotions.

It is because of love and I can feel that love all over me. Sweetheart, you make me fulfilled. I'm grateful for the gift of a child you have given me this day. It gladdens my heart.

Alright! I'm back.

So I asked, how can someone go through pain just to bring the other joy?

I freshly managed to get a answer to this - Just one day ago, you performed the most incredible, awe-inspiring, and miraculous act - you gave birth to our child, our joy.

I wanted to take a moment to share my thoughts and feelings about the incredibly painful and fearful labour you went through just a day ago. It's a memory that will forever be etched in my heart, and I believe it's important for you to know the depth of emotions I experienced during that time.

You literally scared me, Manjiri. This time, really strongly.

Seeing you in pain, enduring the intense contractions, and witnessing the exhaustion etched across your face was heart-wrenching. I couldn't help but feel a sense of helplessness, wishing I could shoulder some of the burden for you.

Your determination to bring our child into this world was nothing short of heroic, and it filled me with immense pride.

As the hours passed, and the pain intensified, my fear grew. Fear for your well-being, for our child's well-being, and for the uncertain path that labour can take. I wanted to be strong for you, to offer you comfort and reassurance, but inside, I was wrestling with my own anxieties. The unknown can be a daunting place, and in that moment, it felt like we were navigating uncharted waters.

Throughout it all, you clung to your strength and courage. You met each contraction with bravery, your grip on my hand tightening with each surge of pain.

Your nails have scraped the skin out of my hand and I'm not complaining.

Trust me or not.

Upto you.

Your determination to bring our child safely into this world was unwavering, and it moved me to tears. I need to share with you the most harrowing moment of my life, a moment when time seemed to stand still and my world nearly crumbled before my eyes. It was during your labour, and I will never forget the sheer terror that gripped my heart at then.

As you were going through the intense contractions, I could see the pain etched across your face, and it tore at my soul. But then, the unthinkable happened. You grew paler, your eyes losing focus, and in an instant, you fainted. My heart plummeted into the deepest abyss of fear and panic.

Seeing you unconscious, Silly Head, was like a nightmare unfolding before me. I felt a rush of terror unlike anything I had ever experienced. It was as if my entire world had stopped, and I was teetering on the edge of losing everything I held dear in the blink of an eye.

Dr. Nagma's swift response, calling for a C-section, felt like a lifeline in that agonizing moment. Their urgency and expertise were a beacon of hope in the darkness that had descended upon our entire family. As they rushed you into the operating room, I felt my legs grow weak, and for a moment, I feared I might pass out myself.

Can you even think that I was fearing of an operating room. Somewhere where I've spent my 9 years of learning and working.

Your 9 months casually side-lined my 9 years.

Yes, Silly Head. This is not a sarcastic remark but actuality. I'm serious.

In those tense minutes, as I stood by your side, praying with every fibre of my being for both of you to be okay, I realized the fragility of life and the depth of my love for you and our child. It was a stark reminder that the things we hold most dear can be taken from us in an instant, and it shook me in a really very odd way.

In that heart-wrenching moment when you fainted during labour, I felt like a man desperately gasping for air, like a fish deprived of water. I cannot emphasize enough how fervently I prayed to God. Something which I rarely do.

My prayers, once whispered, became a desperate plea, a cry from the deepest recesses of my soul. It was as if time had halted, and I was suspended in a moment of sheer vulnerability, feeling utterly powerless in the face of the unknown.

My prayers in that moment were not just for your physical well-being but for the preservation of the beautiful life we've built together.

It was during those agonizing minutes that I truly understood the saying that pregnancy brings a couple closer to each other at an entirely different level. In that moment of crisis, it wasn't just your life that hung in the balance; it was our shared dreams, our future, and the love that binds us together. In short, my life too was hanging in the balance.

Manjiri, I cannot imagine my life without you. You are my rock, my anchor, and the love of my life. I knew then, as I know now, that you are the very essence of my existence, and losing you would be losing a part of myself.

Your pregnancy brought us closer in ways I could never have imagined, and it's important for me to express the depth of my feelings and experiences during that remarkable time. Let me take you on a journey through those nine months, a journey that was as emotional and romantic as it was challenging. It was a journey marked by both challenges and love, and it's important for me to share these details with you.

The journey began with the news of your pregnancy, a moment of pleasant surprise, sheer joy and anticipation.

But soon after, we faced the harrowing possibility of a threatened miscarriage. Those early days were marred by constant anxiety, a feeling that something so precious was hanging by a fragile thread. We held our breath with every doctor's appointment, praying for good news. The threatened miscarriage was a dark cloud that loomed over us, casting a shadow of fear. Yet, in the face of this uncertainty, your determination and maternal love shone through, and it drew me even closer to you.

The first trimester, while filled with excitement, was also a period of unease. You experienced morning sickness that felt relentless, leaving you drained and uncomfortable. You faced exhaustion that seemed to have no end, yet you persevered with a strength that left me in awe. Sleepless nights became the norm as you struggled with discomfort, restless legs, and the constant need to use the bathroom. It felt like we were in a perpetual state of anticipation, waiting for the next milestone, the next ultrasound, to assure us that our baby was thriving.

The second trimester brought some relief, but it came with its own set of challenges. As your body changed, you navigated the discomfort of growing pains, backaches, and other things which I'm failing to recall. Yet, you faced it all with grace and an unwavering commitment to our child's well-being.

The third trimester was a rollercoaster of emotions. The anticipation of our baby's arrival was tinged with anxiety about labour and delivery. Preparing for the birth while managing the physical and emotional demands was a big deal. Yet, you did it. You did it all. And I'm very proud of you.

Throughout your pregnancy, I witnessed your mood swings, a rollercoaster of emotions that left me both baffled and enchanted. One moment, you would cling to me, wanting to be as close as possible, and in the next, you'd push me away, seeking space and solitude. Your emotions were a complex tapestry, and I struggled at times to understand what you needed, but I was determined to be there for you, no matter what.

Oh, the tears, my love!

Gosh!

There were times when you cried over the most trivial matters, and your tears would either make me laugh on knowing the weird reasons. Or break my heart knowing the actual serious ones. I'd hold you close, wiping away those precious drops, and reassure you that everything would be alright.

And then, there were moments when you'd laugh uncontrollably, your laughter infectious until you had made the whole house aware that your were laughing. Your joy was my joy, and those moments were pure magic.

I learned to be patient and adapt to your changing needs, always ready to hold you close or give you space as required.

Your mischievous side emerged during your pregnancy, and I loved every moment of it. Or can say tolerated more than loved.

Sorry!

But just being honest.

Whatever!

I couldn't help but be captivated by your playful antics at times. Your playful teasing and antics kept our days bright and filled with laughter. It was during this time that you made me cook for you, wash clothes for you, and sing for you - things I had never done before.

Things which even Maa didn't make me do ever. But, you did.

Oh! I almost forgot about your head and feet massage sessions. Ain't complaining since I cherished every moment of it because it brought us closer, and actually, it was my way of showing my care and devotion to you and our growing family.

And oh, the cooking!

Your pregnancy remarkably improved my culinary skills, and I am now a pro at making the chowmein you absolutely love. It's as though your pregnancy has magically transformed me into a culinary expert, especially when it comes to preparing your beloved dishes. Every dish I prepared was infused with love, though at times it didn't taste good. Alright, most of the times. I agree. But all those were a symbol of my commitment to making your experience worthy, memorable.

And I really hope, I did so.

I must admit, I've been genuinely surprised by the absence of those stereotypical, bizarre pregnancy cravings that we've all heard so much about. Throughout your pregnancy, you've remained admirably consistent in your food choices, and while I half-expected some unusual requests, your palate has remained delightfully familiar. Making that so easy for me and others at home.

It's funny how we hear stories of expectant mothers craving pickles and ice cream at odd hours or concocting combinations that boggle the mind. Yet, you've kept things rather ordinary in that department, and I can't help but chuckle at how you've defied those clichés.

Silly Head, I can't help but marvel at the radiant beauty that pregnancy has bestowed upon you.

You are more stunning than ever, and those few extra kilos you've embraced only add to your glow. If anything, they're a testament to the incredible journey we've embarked on together.

As I look at you, I see a woman who is not only nurtured a new life within her but also blossomed in ways that are beyond words. Your pregnancy has brought out a unique charm in you, one that makes you even more enchanting in my eyes. Your body's changes are a reflection of the miracle of life, and you wear them with such grace and elegance.

And as for my own "baby weight," well, let's just say I've been on a mission to match your enthusiasm in every sense. After all, we're in this journey together, and it's only fitting that I show my solidarity by sharing a few extra kilos with you. We're a team, and the world should indeed know that we were expecting parents. Now, proud parents.



I'll always cherish those moments when your pregnancy brought us closer in more ways than one. There were times when you craved intimacy, and I, too, longed for that connection with you. In the gentle moments we shared during all this time, our love blossomed in the most beautiful way.

There were times when your eyes spoke volumes, and I couldn't resist drawing you close. Our embrace, filled with tenderness, felt like a safe haven, where time seemed to stand still. I remember the softness of your touch and the warmth of your skin against mine as we embraced each other. Your body, with its gentle curves, felt like a safe house of love and life. Our intimacy during your pregnancy was a delicate and tender expression of our love, a profound connection that transcended words.

Our fingers entwined as if telling a story of their own, tracing delicate patterns on each other's skin. The softness of your mushes against mine sent shivers down my spine, igniting a spark that was uniquely ours. The warmth of your breath against my skin was a sweet reminder that our connection transcended the physical.

In those quiet moments, it wasn't just our bodies coming together; it was our hearts and souls, entwined in a dance of love and trust. The world around us faded away, leaving only the two of us, lost in the sweetness of our love.

These moments of intimacy were a testament to the depth of our affection and the unspoken understanding that passed between us. They were a beautiful chapter in the story of our journey through your pregnancy.

Your vulnerability during those times allowed me to see you in a new light, and I felt an overwhelming desire to protect and care for you. Your body was changing, and yet, I found you more beautiful than ever.

Your strength in carrying our daughter was awe-inspiring.

Our conversations about parenthood, the shared excitement and occasional anxiety, brought us closer. We laughed at the baby books' quirky advice and wondered about the mysteries of our soon-to-arrive bundle of joy. And we cried happy tears whilst talking to the baby whenever she had kicked or showed movements. I remember you making soft pleas to your womb, our daughter to remain safe and support you time to time.

Manjiri, your pregnancy was a transformative experience for both of us, filled with ups and downs, laughter and tears, and an ever-deepening connection. And I'm grateful for every moment we shared during all these months, and I look forward to a lifetime of more beautiful moments with you and our precious daughter.

It's been just a day since you brought our beautiful child into this world, and I find myself in awe of the incredibleness of of the outcome of that painful waiting period.

Words could never capture the overwhelming flood of emotions I experienced when I placed our baby into your awaiting, exhausted arms.

As you emerged from the haze of anaesthesia, your eyes, filled with both pain and anticipation, were locked onto the tiny bundle we had been waiting for so eagerly. Your restlessness, the way you strained to catch even the briefest glimpse of our child, was heart-breaking yet beautiful.

I was the first one to hold her, but obviously after the medical staff. But, I held her first even before you. The nurse might have brought her to you for skin contact but I guess, you hardly remember it because of the unconsciousness.

You had been so restless, coming back from unconsciousness, your very being craving that one precious glimpse of our child. It was as if time stood still as I held our baby close, and I could feel your heart racing with anticipation.

When I finally transferred our daughter into your trembling embrace, the room seemed to hold its breath. Your tears, a mixture of exhaustion, relief, and sheer love, trickled down your cheeks. It was as if the universe paused, and in that suspended moment, I saw a mother's heart laid bare.

I didn't saw my Silly Head in that moment but someone else.

I saw my Baby's Mom.

You had been calling me Baby's Dad from very long now but I never did. Since, it used to feel weird especially when someone from the family was around.

Yes, I'm admitting this today. I used to feel very awkward among my own people when they used to address our baby as 'Shaurya's baby' or... I don't know if it's making any sense but you know, all of that implied that we...

Never mind!

You must have got it.

So let's go back to the topic.

So, my Baby's Mom. At then, your eyes, which had been so weary just moments before, suddenly sparkled with an unparalleled joy and tenderness. It was as if you had been reborn in that instant, and I knew our lives would never be the same again.

Your whispered words of love, the gentle way you cradled our child, sent shivers down my spine. The room was awash with a profound silence, broken only by the soft cries of our daughter. In that sacred space, I felt like an observer of a love so deep, so pure, that it could move mountains and heal wounds.

Tears welled up in my eyes as I watched you two, my adorable girls, the embodiment of an unbreakable bond. It was a moment that reaffirmed my love for you and filled me with gratitude.

I want to put into words what I felt when our precious daughter entered this world. It's a moment I'll cherish forever.

When she finally arrived, I was spellbound. Our little angel, so tiny and pink, was wrapped in soft white fabric.

That sight, oh my God!

The sight of her, swaddled in a soft blanket, took my breath away. I was in awe of her delicate features, those tiny fingers. She was, and still is, a perfect blend of us. But, she's more of you than mine.

I remember the nurse offering to place her in my arms, and I hesitated for a moment. I was afraid I might hurt her, that she was too fragile. Her skin is so delicate, pink and soft unlike mine. What if my contact created rashes to her skin? I was doubtful.

But as I held her for the first time with Shri Bhabhi's help, I realized the incredible strength that resides in her vulnerability. The way she nestled against my chest, seeking comfort, filled me with a profound sense of responsibility and love.

Her resemblance to you was striking. Those delicate features, the shape of her eyes, and the hint of a smile on her tiny lips mirrored yours in a way that left me breathless. It was as if I were looking at a reflection of your beauty and grace.

Time seemed to stand still for a moment. I felt a profound numbness wash over me, not from fear or uncertainty, but from the sheer magnitude of the moment. The realization that I was now a father, responsible for this precious life, and that you, my strong and resilient wife, had brought her into this world, left me momentarily speechless.

I held her close, cradling her in my arms, and felt the warmth of her tiny body against mine. I then realized how your eyes turn misty when you're too overwhelmed with joy. Cause I did the same in that very moment.

Though you were unconscious, your presence was palpable in that room. It was as if your strength and love had infused our daughter, giving her the best start in life possible.

It's hard to put into words the feeling of knowing that a part of us, our love and hopes for the future, was now breathing in this world. It was as if our hearts have taken a physical form.

I want to take you back to another moment that was nothing short of surreal, a moment that filled my hearts with an indescribable array of emotions - the first time our daughter was placed in the arms of Maa, and later, Papa's.

It's a scene etched in my memory with vivid colours and emotions that I can't help but share with you.

As I gently transferred our tiny, fragile bundle of joy into Maa's waiting arms, it was as though time stood still. Her eyes were sparkling with tears of pure joy and wonder. The warmth of her embrace filled the room, and I realized I had never seen her so profoundly contented. I then realized that I was supposed to be present at Vaidik's birth too, to witness such look on her face before too.

Manjiri, it was a moment where generations converged, a passing of the torch of love from one era to the next.

My mother, who had raised me with unwavering love, cradled our daughter with a tenderness that transcended words. It was a connection that spoke volumes about the beautiful cycle of life, about how the love she had bestowed upon me was now being passed on to our daughter. Her smile radiated pride and happiness as she held her granddaughter close.

And then, the most unexpected transformation occurred before my eyes. My father, known for his stoic nature, stood there with a mixture of excitement and nervousness in his eyes as he awaited his turn. When our daughter was gently placed in his arms, I watched in awe as his tough exterior gave way to the overwhelming emotions within.

Papa's eyes, which had always been a source of strength and guidance for me, grew misty. It was a moment of vulnerability, a rare glimpse into his soul. He held our daughter with a reverence that spoke volumes, as if he recognized the precious gift that she was, not just to us, but to him as well.

Seeing my parents embrace their new roles as grandparents with such tenderness and awe filled my heart with gratitude. It was a testament to the enduring bonds of family, a reminder of the beauty that comes with welcoming a new life into the world.

As I reflect on that profoundly emotional moment, I want to express my deepest gratitude to you, my beloved wife, my Silly Head, my Baby's Mom. You brought this incredible blessing into our lives, and you've not only given me the gift of our daughter but also the gift of witnessing my parents' love and joy as they hold their granddaughter. You are the heart and soul of my life, and I am endlessly grateful for your strength, love, and the beautiful journey we've embarked on together.

As a brand-new father, just one day into this incredible journey of parenthood, words can hardly encapsulate the whirlwind of emotions that course through my being.

The overwhelming sensation of love that enveloped me is beyond any I've ever experienced. It's as if a new chamber of my heart had been unlocked, flooding me with an unparalleled depth of affection for this tiny, fragile being who has already captured my heart.

Joy, pure and unadulterated, surged through me like a tidal wave. In her every sigh, cry, every delicate movement of her tiny fingers, I found a source of boundless happiness. The realization that I am now responsible for nurturing and guiding this precious life fills me with a sense of purpose I've never known before. Her arrival has bestowed upon me a profound sense of meaning in life.

But with this joy also comes a sense of vulnerability and trepidation. Holding my daughter, so fragile and dependent, reminds me of the immense responsibility I bear. I'm acutely aware that her well-being, her happiness, and her future are now intertwined with my own. The weight of this responsibility can be daunting, but it's a weight I am more than willing to carry.

As I look at her tiny features, I can't help but wonder who she will become. What adventures and challenges await her in this world? What dreams will she chase, and what passions will she develop? These questions fill me with curiosity and a burning desire to provide her with the tools and support she needs to carve her own path.

My daughter, our daughter, is a miracle, a bundle of hope and promise wrapped in the softest of blankets. I may be only one day into this journey of fatherhood, but with her by my side, I'm ready to embrace every challenge and cherish every moment. She is my greatest gift.

If you're my love then she is definitely my love personified.

And I can't wait to witness the incredible person she will become.

I want you to know that I fully recognize that your sacrifices are of a different magnitude and nature, given the physical and emotional demands of pregnancy and childbirth. Nevertheless, I believe that as parents, our sacrifices are intertwined, complementing each other to create a nurturing and loving environment for our child.

I know you feel bad for me, at times. Despite telling not to you still blame yourself.

But, Silly Head, do understand that in my professional life, I've made deliberate choices to align my career with our family's needs. I've willingly opted for positions that allow me to be more present for you and our child. This has meant forgoing certain career opportunities that might have required extensive travel or long hours of my concentration.

I'm not gonna lie to you, I've definitely sometimes felt like I'm moving at a slower pace professionally, but I want you to also know that I've made these choices willingly, understanding that our family comes first.

While I'm conscious that my sacrifices may not equate to the incredible physical and emotional journey you've undertaken as a mother, I want you to understand that they come from the same place of love and dedication to our family.

Together, we are building a strong foundation for our child's future.

My love for you has only deepened as I witness the amazing mother you are to our daughter. I want to stand by your side, shoulder to shoulder, in this beautiful journey of parenthood. Your sacrifices inspire and drive me to make my own, knowing that it's our collective efforts that will shape our child's life.

I want to express how my love for you has deepened in ways I could never have imagined, and how I now hold even greater love and respect for my own mother. For my sister, sisters-in-law and indeed for every woman in the world.

The way you embraced this new role with such grace, nurturing our daughter with a tenderness and strength that left me in awe, has made me fall in love with you all over again. Your sacrifices, your unwavering love, and the incredible care you provide for our daughter are beyond words. I find myself feeling closer to you than ever before, connected in this profound way.

Thinking about my own mother, I'm overwhelmed with gratitude for all she did to raise and support me. Now that I've experienced the joys and responsibilities of parenthood first-hand, I appreciate her sacrifices even more. I've found myself reaching out to her, seeking her wisdom, and thanking her for the love and care she showered upon me. Becoming a father has given me a newfound respect for the sacrifices that mothers make every day.

This journey into parenthood has also deepened my respect for every woman in the world. I've come to realize the incredible strength and resilience that women possess, not just in giving birth but also in their multifaceted roles as caregivers, nurturers, and providers.

In the brief time since our daughter's arrival, I've felt a profound transformation within me. Our daughter's birth has not only filled our lives with joy but has also opened my eyes to the beauty and complexity of motherhood and womanhood.

I am wholly committed to doing everything in my power to ensure that our daughter spreads her wings and soars to the greatest heights in life. I also recognize that the love and respect I show to you are pivotal in shaping her understanding of love.

Our daughter is a precious gift, and I promise to be her steadfast supporter, her protector, and her guide. I will encourage her to dream big, to chase those dreams with determination, and to believe in herself, even in the face of challenges. I want her to know that she can achieve anything she sets her mind to, and I will be there to celebrate her victories and offer solace in her defeats.

But it's equally important for me to convey that the love and respect I show to you are a crucial part of my commitment to her. By loving you deeply, cherishing you, and treating you with the utmost respect, I hope to set an example for the kind of love she should seek in her own life. I want her to witness a relationship built on trust, communication, and unwavering support, so that she never settles for anything less than a love that is nurturing, respectful, and empowering.

Our love is the foundation upon which our family is built, and I promise to nurture and strengthen it daily, not only for our sake but also as a powerful example for our daughter. I want her to understand that love should be kind, patient, and enduring, and I will strive to be the embodiment of those qualities for both of you.

I realize that words will never be sufficient to communicate what I feel for you. I love you so much and must tell you this from my heart.

Thank you for loving me and my daughter in the manner in which you do. It's perhaps the best joy of my life.

I need you to realize that my heart will thump for you, only for you. Such a large amount of my life's joy has resulted from you. Thank you for this astonishing life that we have assembled together.

Can't wait to take you both home.

Yours truly,

Dr Saahab (Your Baby's proud Dad)