♥🇪‌🇵‌🇮‌🇱‌🇴‌🇬‌🇺‌🇪‌♥

❆Jake❆

My phone rings for the fourth time.

I would've picked it up if I remembered where I dropped it. 

Or maybe if I had the strength to get off the muddy ground where my ass has been drinking for the past hour.

The sun isn't shining today, and rain pours down in icy drops. Water slides down my hair and clothes, numbing my body to the point where it feels brutally normal.

The mouth of the bottle presses against my cold lips and I take another swing, feeling the burning liquid glide down my throat.

Two headstones sit in front of me, side by side, the earth beneath them covered by moss and grass.

Leaning my head back, I close my eyes and let the rain hit my face. If people say the library is the quietest place, they're wrong. The quietest has always been the cemetery.

It's been seven years.

Time heals everything. Time heals all pain.

Then why didn't I heal yet?

Why isn't the pain not numbing?

How much time more?

Tears prick at the back of my eyes, but I hold them in.

My hand reaches into the pocket of my coat, pulling out a sheathed knife. Opening my eyes, I gaze at the intricate markings with designs of red and black roses.

"I got you a gift," I say to her headstone. "I kept my promise."

My eyes flick to the headstone beside hers. "I know you're having a really good time with her. Raising hell in heaven, right, mom?"

My eyes move from Kennedy's headstone to mom's. Looking back and forth between them.

"Fuck you both." I take a swing of the bottle, licking my lips clean when a few drops spill onto them. "Toothy's the only girl who hasn't left me."

Toothy.

All grown up and a mature woman now. Completed college and is already looking for a model agency.

Can't believe Corey graduated high school, but he's doing pretty good. Fucker actually became something in life. Worldwide influencer. He's literally in demand.

Despite me missing almost three months of classes after Kennedy's death, I still somehow got top grades. With a job at a hospital that pays high, I can't fucking believe I reached this far without my mom and my wife.

They're the reason I wanted to become a doctor in the first place.

To save other people that are going through what they went through.

To everybody's relief, I haven't shut anyone out after Kennedy's death like they expected me to. I do have a little bit of a drinking problem though.

Like now.

"Happy fucking anniversary." I raise the bottle to Kennedy's headstone. "We've been married for seven years now." With that, I take another swig of the alcohol. I'm sure my head's gonna explode now by how much I drank already. "Wanna know what I'm doing for our anniversary, babe?"

"I'm gonna sit here and remind you of how you're always fucking mine," I say. "From the moment you walked into my home till now, you've always been mine."

My jaw clenches when I remember the words of one of my co-workers.

"You know what she said? My co-worker? She said I need to get fucking married again." A glare comes onto my face. "Doesn't she see the ring I wear every second? The ring that you put on me. I am fucking married. I'm married to you."

I shake my head. "Why do people want to erase you from me? They act as if you're replaceable and that putting another woman beside me is gonna make me forget you."

I look at mom's headstone. "Dad didn't replace you. It's been fifteen years and he doesn't even glance at other women."

"Oh shit, Kennedy, I forgot to tell you something." My lips press together unhappily as I look at her headstone. "Dr. Gabriel died last week from a heart attack."

My head tips down at the memory of his funeral that Corey, Toothy, dad and I flew to California to attend. He was a great man. I didn't even realize he was that old.

I raise my bottle to the air. "To Dr. Gabriel." And take a huge sip, tasing bitterness and a bit of the rain on my tongue.  

My phone rings again and I finally move my head around to look for it.

Spotting it a few feet away from me, I lean and snatch it off the floor, answering the phone and pressing it to my ear.

"Jake!" Toothy exclaims immediately. I don't miss the panic in her voice.

My eyebrows furrow, worried.

Toothy knows I'd be sitting by mom and Kennedy the entire day. She wouldn't disturb me unless it's something really important.

"What happened?" I ask.

"I know you don't want to be disturbed right now and this is probably the worst time to call you but—"

"Just say it, Toothy." I cut her off.

"Corey's missing."

I frown. "Missing? What do you mean missing?"

"I don't know!" She exclaims. "He isn't answering his phone and I haven't seen him since yesterday!"

I furrow my eyebrows. "Sure he isn't just playing hide and seek with us?"

"For more than twenty-four hours? He's seriously missing, Jake."

I grit my teeth. "I'm on my way."

Ending the call, I stuff my phone into my pocket.

I look at Kennedy's headstone. "Sorry, babe. You've always known how Corey is. Some serious shit happened with him after you left. Something went seriously wrong with him and Autumn. He's kinda not the same anymore." I say. "But he's still an idiot."

Gathering my shit, I stand up. Icy chills go down my body as the wind picks up and blows through my drenched body. The rain's coming to a stop.

I take a step but stumble with blurry eyes and a pounding head.

Shit, I'm drunk. I can't drive home like this.

Reaching into my pocket, I grab my phone and dial.

He picks up within the first ring. "Hey."

"Hey, dad."

"You spoke to Toothy?"

"Yup. Corey's missing. I know." I say. "Listen, come pick me up? I'm kinda drunk right now and can't drive."

"On my way." He replies.

With that, I end the call and stuff my phone back into my pocket.

My gaze lands on Kennedy's grave.

A wave of emotions hit me all over again. I realize I'm still gripping her knife in my hand. I stumble over to her grave and curse when I slip because of the slippery ground and land right beside her headstone.

I right myself into a proper sitting position and look at her headstone.

"You're still fucking mine." I point out. "I'm not marrying anyone no matter how young people tell me I am. I'm equally yours as much as you are mine. Till the end of the fucking world. You hear me?" Tears break out in my eyes and before I know it, they're sliding down my face.

Fuck, I'm seriously drunk if I can't control my emotions rightly.

I touch the knife's blade with my other hand. Not too sharp, not too blunt. Just like how it was supposed to be made, fun for Kennedy but not dangerous.

A pang hits my chest and I close my eyes at the pain. A shaky sigh comes out of my lips. When I open my eyes, tears fall down again.

My body leans towards Kennedy's headstone, my mind not even realizing my actions until the knife in my hand reaches the headstone and grazes one long line.

I pause for a second, gazing at the line with a long look.

My hand raises again, placing the tip of the knife against her headstone. My eyes blur with tears as I graze the words onto her headstone with trembling hands.

Being, done, I sit back and gaze at the words.

Anger flashes through me and I burst. "Everyone can fuck themselves! You're not replaceable. You hear me, Ken? I still love you so fucking much, I don't even care about the pain anymore. Anything is worth it if it's coming from you!" I don't even realize I'm yelling. "Fuck my co-worker! She can marry whoever the fuck she wants to. Fuck everyone who told me I should move on and start a new life! I love you and only you!"

I'm breathing heavily by the time I'm done. Closing my eyes, I let myself cool down, taking in deep breaths.

Opening my eyes, I read the words again that are forever marked on her headstone and will never disappear no matter who or what tries to erase them away. I read the words over and over again, gazing at them long enough for them to create a permanent image in my head.

'Jake's Kennedy'

𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐄𝐍𝐃

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Words: 1,400

Date of publishing: 21st June 2022