Alternative title: Class 1-A learns to fear arrow-shaped eyebrows and smiles that are just a little too kind.

yeah so, this is gonna be like... a book filled with (mainly) crack fics about Izuku's time at U.A. when he learns not to mess with his classmates, what things not to mention, etc. xD

as the title says, how to 'survive'

first up...

The legend of 'Sonic the Unforgiving'

(sorry, it kinda sucks, especially towards the end xD)

---

Tenya Iida was, as he liked to think, a normal teenager (even if he could be a bit pushy about the rules), and at the very least believed that his classmates respected him in some regard.

...He'd completely dropped that idea a mere 3 weeks into living at the dorms (which, honestly, was pretty impressive considering their absolute disregard for rules and relentless need to cause trouble).

Minute after minute, hour after hour, day after goddamn day, and week after week, he'd be the one expected to clean everything up.

Of course, Tenya often volunteered for the tasks, but as the days went along, he noticed that, despite him helping more, the U.A. Dorms were deteriorating even further!

One day, he decided to confront his classmates, and once he gained his answer, he, for once, was at a loss for words.

"All right!" Tenya called out, standing in front of the dorm TV as the rest of his classmates watched some Disney movie, "I'd like to ask for your attention!"

"Iidaaaa," Kaminari groaned, waving his hand, "Move to the side, it's just getting to the good part."

"Yeah, c'mon, man. Can you just let us finish?" Kirishima requested and, although he was more polite than the lightning-quirked boy, considering the previous attitude he had received it really wasn't that much of an accomplishment.

Iida let out a breath, bending down to pick up the TV remote before spinning around and pausing the movie. When he heard a chorus of groans and angry mumbles, he turned around, remote in hand. "I apologize for interrupting your movie, but as soon as we're done here, you can return right to it. I feel that this is important enough to address now, and won't be waiting any longer."

"Just get on with it, four eyes," Bakugou grumbled, and Iida chose to ignore the way his eye twitched.

"What is it, Iida?" Midoriya asked, more respectful by leaps and bounds.

Iida allowed himself to relax slightly - though not by much - and nodded to himself. "Well, I've noticed an issue regarding our living space here, and-"

"Huh?" Sero raised a brow, cutting the boy off, "I don't see anything wrong."

"Well you see, I wasn't fini-"

"Yeah, it seems alright to me," Jirou agreed.

Iida bit the inside of his cheek. "I'm still-"

"Hey, guys, let the man talk," Shinsou said boredly and, although it might've seemed helpful, he seemed far too disinterested for Tenya to see it as a kind gesture.

"I understand that-"

"Ah, you're right," Kirishima nodded towards Shinsou before turning towards Iida with a smile. "What was it, Iida?"

Tenya remained still for a moment, taking in deep breaths and trying to keep a blood vessel from bursting. "As I was saying...," he said in a strained voice before calming himself slightly, "Although I'm happy to help around the dorms, I've noticed that, even with my assistance, things seem to be getting progressively worse."

"Ehhh?" Bakugou spoke up, his signature scowl on his face. "What are you on about, dumbass?"

"Language," the blue-haired boy forced out, clenching his fist in order to hold onto the last threads of his sanity. Before the blonde could speak up about his short reprimanding, he continued. "For one," he began, "I often find trash littered around the dorms. Not to mention the laundry that you all often forget to take to your room for hours, and your late night escapades when you choose to stay up far too late and barely make it to school on time." He took in a deeper breath with each item on his list, but at least hoped that his classmates would understand. "Cleaning up after yourselves, remembering to bring personal items back to your room, doing all of your work on time, ensuring that-"

Shinsou raised a brow. "Are you just gonna list off every fault you can see or what?"

"Well-"

"Yeah," Mina commented far too smugly, "I always get to school on time."

"Only because I wake you u-"

Kaminari huffed. "And every time I bring something down, it always ends up back in my room."

"I always bring it t-"

"I may play video games late at night, but I still go to sleep at some point," Sero said, smirking to himself.

 "I've had to tell you to go to sl-"

Ojiro raised his head slightly. "Y'know, I don't even think I've ever seen trash left around before."

 "Yeah," Satou agreed, "Like, my ingredients are always put away and the counters are always wiped down by the time I wake back up."

Tenya blinked. "Who do you think does that for-"

"All these damn nerds have a point for once, four eyes," Bakugou scoffed, "So what in the fuck are you even complaining about?"

Tenya opened his mouth to speak only to realize that, although he had so many things to say to his classmates, he couldn't even bring himself to speak.

"Well, mon ami?" Aoyama said, "I do need my beauty sleep - even if I still look fabulous without it - so it'd be best if we could finish the movie quickly."

The blue-haired boy simply scanned the group of his classmates and, while some at least had the decency to look a bit sheepish, a good chunk of them seemed borderline annoyed.

 "I... see...," Tenya finally let out. "I'll just get going, then."

Just when he'd passed the couch, Mina spoke up. "Uh... Iida? The remote?"

Tenya remained still for a moment.

 Tsuyu turned her head, looking over the couch. "...Iida? Are you okay? Ribbit."

"I'm just fine," he finally said.

"Then can we have-"

Before Sero could finish his sentence, Iida had already thrown the remote straight at the boy, causing him to let out a yelp as he ducked, and finally allowing the remote to hit Kaminari directly in the face.

Kaminari let out a shout, rubbing his forehead and hissing as the remote fell into his lap.

"What's his problem...?" Satou muttered.

"The darkness must've gotten to him," Tokoyami replied solemnly.

Ignoring his classmates' comments about him, Tenya simply headed up to his room, closing the door behind him with a sigh. "I better set an alarm so I can clean up after them in the morning," the boy said tiredly, pinching the bridge of his nose. After placing his glasses on his bedside table, though, he paused.

...Or maybe...

---

"THE FUCK?!" Bakugou shouted, lighting off a few explosions and consequently waking up most who hadn't already.

"Hmm?" Izuku mumbled sleepily, rubbing his eye. "What's wrong, Kacchan?"

"WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN 'WHAT'S WRONG,' YOU DAMN NERD?!" he barked, gesturing past the main hall, "JUST TAKE A GODDAMN LOOK!"

Izuku raised his head, blinking to ward away his tiredness, only for his eyes to widen. "Wh-What?!" he yelped.

"What's going on?" Ojiro asked, stepping up from behind them, and the pattern continued.

The majority of Class 1-A slowly clustered in the hallway before spilling out into the main room, looking around in a slow-rising horror.

"What happened here...?" Uraraka asked, voice nothing more than a terrified whisper.

"It's...," Kirishima began.

Jirou completed the 'sentence' for him, nose wrinkling. "Disgusting."

The first thing that hit them was the smell. A mixture of odors intertwined to create a disgusting combination within the air - an unholy smell that, although its components wouldn't be so bad, made something horrified when combined.

Cheddar-cheese, ranch, barbeque (and whatever other flavors they had in their pantry) chips. An excessive amount of flour, the lingering burning from Satou's messier cupcakes (when the batter had dripped into the oven), and a good amount of other ingredients. Overfilled trash. Yesterday's mixture of teenage odors that did not create a pleasant smell for the morning. And, unfortunately, that's not even where it ended.

"Doesn't someone usually febreze this place when we leave?" Kaminari muttered, pinching his nose.

Before anyone could answer, Hagakure flicked on the lights in the TV area and practically shrieked.

"What's wrong?" Ojiro asked worriedly, rushing over only for his face to pale. "Holy shit."

Slowly, the class congregated to meet the two, each of their expressions twisted in some form of horror.

Wrappers of all kinds were carelessly tossed around, crumbs and popcorn littered the couch and ground, the remote was stained with cheesy fingertips and, oh god who spilled red juice on the carpet because that would not be fun to get out.

"Guys...," Jirou said, already having moved onto the kitchen. "What the hell?"

And as soon as they looked over, they saw exactly what she was talking about.

Not only were all kinds of snacks, ingredients (and whatever the students had decided to randomly leave laying around) crowding the counter (along with the nearby tables and even the floor), but almost every single cabinet was left open (even the fridge??), and nearly every surface that wasn't covered with items was layered with flour.

Of course, it didn't end there.

As the students wandered around, they slowly found further issues, including (but not limited to), a clogged toilet, several items that they had forgotten to take back upstairs, clothes randomly left in the laundry room, and even more messes on the floor and counters of other rooms.

Once everyone had found themselves back inside the main room, Uraraka fell into one of the only clean chairs and held her head in her hands. "How'd this all happen in one night?!"

"Well..." Jirou paused, glancing around. "We were just watching a movie last night."

"And," Kaminari mentioned, recoiling, "We did bring out a whole lotta snacks for that."

Tsuyu pressed her finger to her chin. "Not to mention Satou's baking. Ribbit."

"I'm pretty sure I forgot like, half of my stuff down here," Kaminari muttered sadly.

Kirishima groaned. "I completely forgot I had my laundry going!"

"I believe I misplaced one of my trusty mirrors...," Aoyama said sadly.

"Alright but," Sero spoke up confusedly - though the boy was clearly incredibly tired - "How did the other rooms get like that?"

"Probably because you idiots kept insisting that you went everywhere together," Shinsou snorted. "And you all - for some reason - decided to bring your things with you too."

"Hey!" Hagakure argued, "I don't wanna be going down some dark hallway by himself, thank you very much!"

Shoji looked confused. "Then... turn the lights on...?"

Tokoyami shook his head. "Revelry in the dark."

"The most important question is," Midoriya mentioned, "How was none of this noticed?"

"Iida," Todoroki replied simply.

Bakugou scowled. "Ehhh? The fuck you mean, Icy Hot?"

Todoroki simply tossed the boy a cold glare that, if it weren't for Yaoyorozu finally speaking up, the blonde might've attempted to murder him for.

"Iida was the one doing everything around here," she said firmly, though she looked a bit upset with herself. "Picking everything up," she said, looking around the room before wincing at Sero who almost had eye bags comparable to Shinsou's, "Making sure we got enough sleep..."

Ojiro put his hand on his forehead. "Taking out the trash..."

"Bringing our stuff back to us if we forgot it," Kaminari muttered, and Aoyama nodded from beside him.

Satou frowned. "Wiping all the furniture down..."

"Making sure it didn't smell like someone died in the main room," Jirou said bluntly.

By the end of it all, everyone had increasingly uneasy expressions on their faces.

Before anyone could say anything, though, steps came thundering down the hall, and Mina appeared in the doorway, clearly out of breath. "Why did... no one... wake... me up?!" she heaved.

Izuku looked surprised by his sudden revelation. "It seems like Iida's gone on strike..."

"Well yeah, but...," Hagakure asked confusedly, patting Mina's back as she joined them and tried to calm her heart rate, "Why?"

"I don't..." Before Jirou could finish the thought, she slapped her hand against her face. "Yesterday."

"What about yesterday, Earphones?!" Bakugou demanded.

"Remember, Kacchan," Izuku said, looking disappointed, "Iida was trying to get our attention..."

 Sero buried his head in his hands. "And we just told him to leave so we could watch our movie..."

"Huh..." Shinsou blinked. "Guess those complaints really were valid."

"Oh god...," Uraraka whispered, horrified, "What have we done...?"

 Kaminari looked like he might fall over. "We got rid of the only person who actually did anything..."

 Sero simply blinked. "Fuck."

"Do you think he'd help us if we begged?" Ojiro asked hopefully.

"Uhm... Probably?" Izuku shrugged, smiling sheepishly. "I mean, he's Iida."

"Yeah... Yeah." Kaminari gave a slight, strained laugh. "Everything will be fine. Of course he'll say yes."

---

"No," Tenya replied simply, causing his classmates' hopeful looks to fall.

"We didn't even ask you anything yet!" Mina groaned.

The boy turned back towards the front of the class. "I'm sure I already know what you're going to say and, if none of your behaviors are going to change, my answer is no."

"FINE!" Bakugou barked, clearly annoyed. "WE DON'T NEED YOU, FOUR-EYES! WE CAN FUNCTION PERFECTLY WITHOUT YOU!"

Iida simply nodded. "Oh, I'm sure you can. Now class is about to start, so it'd likely be best for all of you to get to your seats."

The rest of the class watched uneasily as Bakugou returned to his desk, stomping and scowling (why he spoke for all of them, they didn't know, but his classmates kinda hated him for it). After a moment, each student - sans Iida and Bakugou - exchanged nervous glances, wondering if they'd really be alright.

---

Uraraka slammed her forehead into the table. "We're doomed."

Kaminari sighed, leaning against the counter and slumping down. "Who ever thought cleaning would be so hard...?"

"How does Iida even get it all done?!" Mina yelled, clearly overwhelmed.

"I believe he wakes up hours before us all," Shoji responded.

Shinsou raised his hand slightly, and he looked even more tired than usual. "I can attest. I've seen the guy rushing around the dorms like a nervous goddamn rabbit."

"Then why'd you never say anything?" Kirishima asked confusedly. "You must've known how manly Iida was if you saw that."

 The purple-haired boy shrugged. "I just thought he was weird."

"You know what else is weird," Uraraka sighed, cheek pressed into the table. "The fact that Iida's not here to yell at us all for swearing."

Sero frowned. "Yeah, it always seemed annoying, but I dunno... I'm kinda expecting it at this point. It feels weird when he doesn't say anything."

"I think it's just fucking fine," Bakugou growled, attempting to scrub out the stain in the carpet. The longer it refused to come out, though, the angrier he became. "GOD DAMN IT, GET THE FUCK OUT OF THE CARPET YOU LOWLY JUICE! DIE, DIE, DIE!" He then let out a shout that seemed to be a show of some sort of primal rage. "FUCK YOUUUUUU!"

Kirishima nervously watched as Bakugou furiously moved a towel back and forth on the carpet, refusing to relent in whatever battle was going on. "Yeah, uh... I think we should probably go with Ojiro's begging plan."

The class gave a resounding sigh. "Agreed."

---

"So you agree to do anything I tell you?" Tenya asked, raising a brow.

Class 1-A nodded, with the sole exception of Bakugou.

"Bakubro!" Kirishima whisper-yelled, "Agree!"

"No fuckin' w-"

Tenya slowly turned towards the blonde, the cold, unforgiving look in his eye causing him to freeze. "Ah... Then I'm afraid I won't be able to help..."

"Nonononono!" Mina sputtered, turning towards Bakugou. "C'mon, Bakugou! Please!"

The rest of the class turned towards the boy, giving him expectant looks, and he finally relented. "Tch. Whatever, four eyes. Just lead the goddamn way."

"Great!" the boy smiled, causing the chill in the room to disappear (Todoroki was seriously confused as to how he caused it in the first place, and briefly wondered if Iida was a secret brother of his before being forced to quickly dismiss the idea when the boy continued). "Firstly..." He turned towards Bakugou, a passive-aggressive look in his eyes. "Stop swearing."

Bakugou's eye twitched, and he stepped forwards. "I'm already listening, four-eyes. Why do you always have to have a stick up your goddamn ass?!"

Tenya paused for a moment before nodding. "Alright, that's fair. Would you perhaps, prefer, if we talked this out in your language?"

The blonde looked a bit confused, only for Tenya to take a step towards him.

"Is this fucking better? Is it more under-fucking-standable to you, Katsuki Bakugou? Are my words getting the fuck through? Or do you have goddamn bolts for brains, and can't think up even the shittiest of thoughts? Have the explosions constantly bursting next to your goddamn brain finally gotten to you? Is that it?" He stepped forwards with each word, only to find himself standing right in front of Bakugou, bending down with a smile that threatened to kill. "Did this help you fucking understand?"

Bakugou remained frozen, looking up at the boy that stood above him. Meanwhile, the rest of the class' faces paled further with each swear that left from Tenya's lips, and the whole interaction left many to short-circuit.

Kaminari blinked, hands twitching up to his face. "Did... Did... Huh?"

Sero slapped his hand over his mouth, not sure whether to laugh or to cry. "No way..."

"I've never heard him curse before...," Uraraka mumbled uneasily.

Mina let out a breath she hadn't even realized she was holding. "I don't think any of us has..."

"Uh... Is it just me or... Is Bakubro..." Kirishima trailed off, gesturing towards the blonde.

The boy in question was gritting his teeth but looked as pale as the rest of them, eyes darting around wildly (trying to look anywhere but up) as Tenya loomed over him.

Tokoyami tensed. "I can almost feel the darkness radiating off of Iida..."

 "No kidding...," Ojiro muttered.

"Wh-whatever," Bakugou spat out, nearly stumbling backwards. "I'll stop or whatever, four-eyes."

Izuku blinked at his former bully being reduced to something akin to a stunningly quiet, obedient child, but he quickly looked away when Bakugou tossed him a scowl (admittedly weaker than normal, but still there).

Once Bakugou joined the rest of the class, arms crossed, Tenya straightened himself, walking to the front as if he were some sort of drill sergeant.

"Alright, now we should get to cleaning! And," he said with a harsh glare that directly contrasted his smile and caused the class to gulp, "If I hear any complaining, I won't hesitate to leave immediately."

"Y-yes sir!" Kaminari blurted out and, while people might've poked fun at him before, the class just couldn't find it in them. After all, they had been forced to find out just how powerful of a force Tenya Iida could be.

Tenya smiled slightly at Kaminari's words (and he briefly wondered if he'd made an awful mistake in boosting the boy's ego) before turning around and heading towards the closet.

"Uh... What's he doing?" Kirishima whispered confusedly.

Sero leaned towards the boy, raising a brow. "I think that's where the cleaning stuff is...?"

After a moment, Tenya came back out, wheeling over a cart of cleaning supplies that caused the class to shiver. "Here's the plan," he began, facing the class, "Kaminari, Kirishima, and Sero will all be washing the couch. And yes," he said, noticing their open mouths, "I do mean wash. You'll have to pull out the cushions and deep-clean them, but they'll be much cleaner - and they'll smell better - than before."

The three boys closed their mouths and gave an uneasy nod as Tenya moved onto the next group. "Satou and Koda will be wiping down the furniture." He paused for a moment, but when no objections came, he continued. "Shoji and Uraraka will be picking up trash in this general area, while Hagakure and Asui will be doing the same in other areas. Similarly, Tokoyami will put everything that's been left out in their proper places.

While Uraraka gave a thumbs up, Tokoyami, Shoji, and Tsuyu gave subtle nods (even Tsuyu wouldn't call Iida out on the whole 'call me Tsu' thing) and, although Hagakure slightly sighed, she eventually nodded as well.

"Aoyama and Ashido will be tasked with finishing up and folding the laundry before returning them to their properly labelled baskets," Tenya said next, glancing over at the two. Mina groaned, but gave a thumbs up anyways.

Aoyama looked as if he might fall over but, fearing Tenya's wrath, forced a smile. "Of course, mon-ami."

"Ojiro and Jirou," he said, catching their attention, "Please return anything you see to their proper rooms. And, when Ashido and Aoyama are done with the laundry, bring that up as well. Oh," he added, "Aoyama, Ashido, Ojiro, and Jirou - this goes for all of you. You'll do your jobs normally, but if anyone requests that their items aren't touched, you'll oblige. And, while you're waiting, Ojiro and Jirou, please clean up anything else you see, because I'm sure that you won't have to return all that much." Once of them gave confirmation that they agreed, Tenya continued.

"Todoroki, I believe the fridge was left open, so it'd be helpful if you could sort that out. Freeze things that are still salvageable and throw everything else out." When the boy gave a small nod, he turned towards Izuku. "Midoriya, while Todoroki is doing that, please gather a shopping list for all of the items we need and," he said, eyes flicking towards the newest member of Class 1-A, "Then go with Shinsou to grab everything."

Shinsou looked annoyed, but agreed nonetheless, and Izuku was quick to pull out a notebook with a determined look in his eye.

"Yaoyorozu, could you use your quirk to recreate any items that were broken, damaged, or lost?" Tenya asked. "I understand that it'll take a while due to its nature, so don't worry about that."

Yaoyorozu nodded. "Of course. I'll be sure to learn about the items quickly, if I don't know about them already."

"Thank you." After a moment, he turned towards Bakugou, who almost seemed to stiffen at his gaze. "And I believe you were attempting to clean the carpets earlier...?"

Bakugou nodded slowly, narrowing his eyes, and Iida put on an almost Nezu-esque smile that sent shivers down everyone's spines.

"Alright, then! Please continue that, then. Oh," he mentioned offhandedly, "And that means you'll be cleaning all the carpets - aside from the ones inside everyone's rooms, of course. That includes the hallways to everyone's rooms, the main room, the-"

Bakugou's eye twitched, and his teeth were gritted, but he forced himself to nod. "Yeah. What f-" Once he saw Tenya's glare, he turned away and scoffed. "Whatever."

"Ah, I'm glad you all agree, then!" Tenya said, smiling. "Please, don't let me stop you from doing what you need, now."

Shinsou raised a brow. "Aren't you doing anything?"

"Hm? Oh, of course," Tenya nodded. "I'll be relaxing in my room. Studying a bit."

Kaminari opened his mouth to protest, but upon remembering what Bakugou had been reduced to previously, he decided to keep quiet.

And, with that, everyone hurried to work and Tenya headed to his room.

"I never knew you had it in you," Aizawa said, lazily leaning against the wall.

"Ah, well, when worst comes to worst..." He trailed off, turning towards his teacher and gaining a sharp look in his eye that - admittedly - startled the man. "Sensei, you should make sure to stand straight." Almost immediately, Aizawa straightened from his slouch. "And you should probably clean yourself up a bit more. It leaves a better impression, and U.A. is a prestigious school after all. And, while I'm mentioning things, a good sleep schedule is always important."

By the time Tenya was finished, Aizawa was too surprised to even reprimand the boy and he found himself standing alone in the hallway, scratching annoyedly at his chin. "Damn brat..."

"Sensei!" A voice called from down the hall, causing the man to freeze. "Language!"

Aizawa felt a shiver go down his spine, and he briefly thought of Nezu's laughter ringing throughout his mind.

Never..., he thought to himself, shaking his head and walking back into his office. They can never meet.

---

Tales went around U.A. for days. Weeks. Months. Even further, really.

It was the legend of the 'Sonic the Unforgiving.'

Many have tried to ask Class 1-A what the legend was all about but, even when they were alone, they stiffened and paled, refusing to give up any information. It was made even more interesting, though, by the fact that even their toughest students (read: Katsuki Bakugou, Shouto Todoroki, and Hitoshi Shinsou) seemed nervous about the whole thing.

Even their homeroom teacher - who seemed to have an odd and sudden makeover with tied up hair, decent dress clothes, and less messy facial hair - would simply mutter to himself about 'terrifying forces,' forgetting the student (or teacher) who mentioned it was even there as he attempted to drown himself with his cup of coffee.

And if anyone brought up that Iida was called 'sir' by his classmates whenever he gave a far-too kind smile...

They'd insist it was a coincidence.

---

yep

i can't write crack, glad you all know now B)

also so much nodding yesyes

xDD

Thanks for reading! <3

btw these are probably all gonna take place in the same universe/time (or at least most of them will), but while there might be some random references, there won't really be a huge overlap xD

also also, requests for some quality shenanigans TM would be much appreciated B)

And here, for the meme B)