Clay pov bc I'm feeling mean enough not to give you Ken content

The need to tell George how I felt was steadily growing,

The stares I sent his way were lasting longer and my thoughts of him had already become as frequent as they could.

I desperately wanted to hold him in my arms, how I wanted to kiss him longer and with more passion than our last one held.

I needed him to be mine, and I felt as though I had a chance of my feelings being reciprocated,

I sat at the counter the next morning, watching him prepare breakfast with a large secret smile on his face, his dark eyes sending me glares to tell me he hadn't forgotten what had happened the night prior, and the glint in his eye told me that he had enjoyed it.

But would he do it with me again?

My stomach was far too busy for it to be this early, fluttering around with nerves from just being in the presence of the brunette before me,

My mind was racing far too fast with ideas for how to ask him out, making my head throb dully.

My throat felt tight and restricted, forbidding me from talking as he moved around the kitchen, not privy to the war inside.

I was practically sick with love for him, and the thought somehow brought a smile to my face as I watched his every movement, my gaze trained to his face in hopes f catching his eye and experiencing the electrifying spark I always felt when our eyes met.

Too soon, the silence was broken between us and George placed a plate of porridge i front of me, beginning to talk, breaking the spell of magical silence that had blanketed the morning.

"What do you think we should to today?" he asks.

"I don't know... I don't think it'd be a good idea to go out, though. I don't know why... just don't feel up for kt, I guess." I say, taking small, guilt filled bites of the food he'd prepared.

"We could stay inside and play video games. We played Minecraft the other day, but I have a WII with Mario Cart and Just Dance. We could play that if you would like?" he looked at me innocently, his typically auburn eyes shining a golden brown in the weak light of the morning.

I wondered if he knew how beautiful he was.

He was far too good.

"Yeah, sure, I'm down." I say, pushing my stool away from the counter, unable to handle the heavy feeling in my gut that grew with every swallow of food.

I ran to my bedroom, sitting down on the bed and trying not to let thoughts about my consumption overtake me. If they did, the hissing would begin, and there would be no escape.

If the voice came back, I knew it would have complete control over me.

Control.

I didn't feel in control these days, but I felt as though it would be fine.

As long as I had George, right?

Wrong.

I didn't have George, i couldn't have George. He was far too perfect, too wholesome.

He shouldn't have had to deal with a wreck like me, yet he did. Because he volunteered to.

The whispering was back.

He should never have saved you

You should have died by now

What do you have to live for

George would be a lot better if you were gone

I closed my eyes slowly, taking deep breaths so as not to panic. I couldnt ruin our day like that.

George should have to deal with the aftermath of my past.

But he dealt with me, didnt he?

A fond smile spread across my face, the mental image of the brunette overtaking the words that were being forced into my ear.

I looked over at the alarm clock that sat unfazed on the bedside table at my leg, telling me that I had been away from the brunette for long enough.

I walked back down the hall towards the kitchen, hearing George talk in hushed tones to some thing that I clearly could not see.

Turning around the corner into the room, I was met with George sitting at the counter still, looking at the ground as he conversed, gentle noises that resembled air following his words, prompting him to respond to something I could not understand.

"Who are you talking to?" I ask, my voice hushed so as not to startle the boy in front of me and disrupt the quiet atmosphere that rested throughout his home.

"Uhhh..." he looked nervous, something that made me unhappy.

I never wanted him to be uncomfortable when telling me something.

"I'm talking to my brother?" he says, looking up at me questioningly.

"You're haunted?" I ask, tilting my head to the side slightly.

"Y-yes?" George looks up at me, sitting up straight and attempting to be bold.

I smile, walking past him around the opposite side of the counter, placing a kiss on his head on my way.

George pov bc I can and I'm not COMPLETELY cruel

He kissed my head as he walked by,

Why must he be so perfect?

How can he be so kind after a past that clearly haunts him?

Why did he have to make the feelings that thrashed around inside my chest nearly combust at his presence.

It was getting harder to keep them under wraps.

Ken was behind me, smiling softly at Clay with approval.

He'd been watching us the past few weeks, slowly warming up to the idea that I loved the blonde.

"You need to tell him." he whispered into my ear. "It will only hurt you if you don't."

Dream was right there, smiling that stupid grin that made me want to slap his face and kiss him at the same time.

Why must he be so perfect?

"George?" he said, his bright green eyes playful as he undoubtedly noticed my staring, making him all the more attractive.

My feelings were bubbling.

They were on the tip of my tongue.

Clay was smiling at me, his eyes locked with mine, sending shivers down my spine.

Ken was behind me, his youth-filled deep voice encouraging a confession, egging the words to my lips and prompting them to spill.

"Clay..." I say, seeing his smile drop by a fraction, me never having used his real name before.

I'd only ever called him 'Dream', a sign of our frienship.

But today, friendship wasn't cutting it.

"I... I think I... I love you." I mutter, my eyes dropping, filled with fear for his response.

Bro, I literally just woke up (do not quote that Dream and George meme, I swear) and I began writing. It's been 30 minutes and my sleep deprived mind pooped out a 1088 worded chapter.

What the heck?

I hope you're all well. I'll most likely post later

Yeah..

I can't think anymore.

Much luv 🫶

Peace on earth, goodwill to men, idfk

1113 words