A/N: Kudos to you if you understood the title reference

"You know, I haven't seen Scott in a while," Rhodey mentioned as he scrambled eggs.

"Who is this Scott?" 

Rhodey looked around at Loki. "Why are you still here?"

The man scoffed. "Because I have nowhere else to go."

"Well, why don't you go back to your Ascard or whatever it's called."

Thor spoke up. "Asgard is now in Norway."

Natasha looked at him from her seat on the counter where she was sharpening Clint's arrows, as all her knives were already as sharp as she could get them. "Norway? But you guys had a whole entire planet, right?"

"Yes, but you see," Thor began, and Clint reached up to turn his hearing aids down. "After our father died, our sister, Hela, who is the goddess of death, came, and destroyed Mjolnir-"

Loki sighed exasperatedly. "We found out Thor is the middle child, our sister is evil and the goddess of death, she attempted to kill us and succeeded in killing half our people, and we eventually defeated her, but in doing that we had to cause Ragnorak, which destroyed our home."

"Thank god," Clint muttered, putting his hand back down. 

"Back to what I was saying," Rhodey continued. "Has anyone seen him?"

"No, I don't really keep tabs on him." The entire kitchen stared at Natasha. "What? I don't."

"We all know you keep tabs on everyone," Clint replied. She sighed. "Fine, but I only do it so he doesn't do something stupid."

Sam shrugged. "He's not really as dumb as he acts sometimes, but he's not the brightest either. Especially compared to that Hope girl."

"So no one has seen him?"

"Seen who?" Tony asked, walking in.

"Scott," the entire room said in unison. Tony blinked. "And why are we concerned about him?"

Natasha rolled her eyes. "Because we are apparently caring and compassionate people."

"No, seriously, why are we concerned about him."

Rhodey rolled his eyes. "Because Tony, we care about people?" Tony raised an eyebrow, unconvinced, and Rhodey sighed. "And also cause we don't want him to do something stupid and reckless."

"There it is!" Tony said and immediately pulled up holographic screens as a toddler walked into the kitchen.

She looked at Natasha and said something that would turn this story into a mature rating. Natasha looked over at Tony pointedly, who gaped at his daughter. "Where did you hear that?"

"Mr. Pirate said it!" Morgan responded cheerfully. Tony sighed. "I'm too old for this."

"And she's too young for it," Clint added.

"Shut up Barton."

-~-~-~-~-~-

Coffee Einstein
Ey

Queen of All Dorks
Do you NEED something?

Coffee Einstein
Yes actually

Anyone seen Scott?

Deaf Dork
Scott?

Right-Hand Dork
Scott?

Punchable Bird
Giant Ant-Man

Right-Hand Dork
Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Him

Coffee Einstein
Yes him

Fighting Spider
Isn't he on this chat?

Deaf Dork
Really,

Queen of All Dorks
He's probably Lego-Man

Punchable Bird
Yup that's him

I hate this name so much

Fighting Spider
Then

Legolas
Why don't you

Fighting Spider
Change it?

Coffee Einstein
...

Queen of All Dorks
Cause I'll just change it right back

Deaf Dork 
Lil

*lil

*lil

*LOL

Right-Hand Dork
LOLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

Coffee Einstein
Ahahahaha

Deaf Dork
Shut the fork up

Fighting Spider
LaNgUaGe

Queen of All Dorks
She didn't actually write it she just typed the word lol

Deaf Dork
,,,

I'm leaving

Right-Hand Dork
Bye Evie!

Try not to make typos in Italian!

Deaf Dork
Stai zitto Peter o ti troverò nel sonno

Right-Hand Dork
0.0

Fighting Spider
LOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

-~-~-~-~-~-

"What if Scott is actually missing?" Natasha handed Clint his arrows back. Tony shrugged at the question. "We find him."

"Is it really that simple? I figure it'll be harder. Things don't usually go the way we plan."

"You're not wrong," Clint told Sam, "but finding someone is usually easier than trying not to get blown up."

"Hear hear," Bucky said sarcastically.

Tony frowned. "I... can't seem to locate him for some reason. Odd."

"That's bad, right?" Natasha asked.

"Yeah, that's bad."

-~-~-~-~-~-

The Bad**s Friend
Peter seems off again

The Twin
I haven't niticed anything

The Guy in the Chair
Me either

The Bad**s Friend
Uh huh.

I'm serious, his tingle thing isn't working

The Twin
*dies of laughtwr*

TINGLE XDDD

The Bad**s Friend
*rolls eyes*

I threw a cup of gelato at him and it legit knocked him down

And wasted my money

The Twin
Weirf

The Guy in the Chair
Not the gelato ToT

The Twin
ToT

COME BACK GELATOOOOO

The Guy in the Chair
We are gathered here today in honor of Gelato-

The Bad**s Friend
I'm done with you two

The Twin
I WILL MISS YOU DEARLY MU FRIEND

GELATO, WHY DID YOI HAVE TO LEAVE US

The Bad**s Friend
Imma leave now

The Guy in the Chair
Do you have anything else you would like to say?

The Twin
Yes.

Gelato, my dwar friend, you were always there for me in my timr of need.

I will misd you morw then you woll ever knoe

The Guy in the Chair
Beautiful.

-~-~-~-~-~-

Static came out of a radio sitting on a car hood in the middle of a parking garage, and a young woman jumped up. "Scott? Scott are you there?"

An older man looked up from his work. "It's been two weeks, I don't think-"

"No, I heard something! Scott!"

Another crackle came from the stereo. "You guys gonna pull me up or what?"

Hope breathed a sigh of relief. "We're trying! Where have you been?!" Hank stopped her. "Pull him up first Hope, and then ask him!"

Hope nodded and did so, and Scott came out. Hope punched him.

"Ah! What was that for?!" He asked offensively, rubbing the side of his face. "You've been gone for two entire weeks, Scott!" Hope shouted.

"What? I've only been in there for about 10 minutes, see?" He showed them his phone. Hank furrowed his brow. "But how is that possible?"

Scott shrugged. "Quantum physics are weird."

"I thought you were lost in there, or-" Hope stopped. Scott hugged her. "It's ok, I'm here now." Hope leaned into him.

"I'm not leaving."

I know, you all are thinking, Morgan, how do you make such accurate typpos?
Well, I'll tell you my secret: Number one, I hang out with Evie enough to know what she makes typos of the most
And number two, if Grammarly corrects it right away than it's definitely common.
See you... whenever I update lol

(And yes Evie, I am working on Parker Luck)

-Morgan