A/N SORRY I'VE BEEN GONE FOR A WHILE
(also, I've never been in a public school before, only all girls private school and coed international so I'm going to mix the coed part with the private school part <3)

And Summer Turns to Fall

SEPTEMBER 21st, 2007

It was the first of Autumn, 2007, and a lot of change was happening. Natasha and Maria had agreed, though it took awhile, to let Sasha have one more year with just them two. Only one more year before trying to find their daughter early child care, followed by some sort of private school institute where she could be safe. Correction, safer.

But now wasn't the time to talk about that sort of dreaded disappointment, it was the start of Fall. Yet again the couple were making their way down to the Barton's before Lila started daycare.

"Remind me why we're not flying?" Maria grumbled, then sighed. "It's almost a sixteen hour drive!"

"Don't be dramatic, Masha. It's fifteen and a half." Natasha giggled, putting the last of their items into the trunk.

"Same shit."

"Get in the damn car, Hill." Nat responded as she opened the passenger door before walking to the other side and getting in.

Maria chuckled. "You forgot something, baby."

"And what is that?"

Maria holds Sasha out for Natasha to see, "The baby, baby. You forgot the baby."

She was expecting a laugh, but got a playful glare and an eye roll instead. "I expected you to put her in the car before getting in yourself, Hill. Use your brain!"

Maria grumbled to herself as she put Sasha in the carseat. "It's seven in the morning, the start of Autumn and I haven't had a sip of caffeine yet." She, not forcefully but definitely not lightly, shut the car door. "My brain said goodbye when I went to sleep last night! Which wasn't until two AM last night and you're to blame!"

"Oh, you wanna play that game, Maria? You can sleep while I drive, and yet I'm the one who kept you up. That doesn't seem fair yet you don't see me complaining, любовь. Catch some sleep before I wake you up for your shift. "

"Noooo, sleep the whole day," Maria complained. For the record, this is a two day roadtrip.

"Ah, we'll see about that."

⧗ⴵ🦅🛡

SEPTEMBER 23rd, 2007
Warnings: me being terrible at writing toddlers

"SASHA! LOOK! COLORS!" Lila shouted, running up to her cousin. "I took three!" She held up a deep auburn leaf along with a navy green and yellow.

Sasha smiled lightly, taking initiative to take them from Lila and place them on the dirt. "Pretty," she responded, tapping her on the head.

They waddled around, collecting the few colored leaves that had made their way to the Barton Farm early. Until Lila took a leaf out of Sasha's hand, and Sasha hit her.

"NO! MY COLOR!" Sasha cried.

Maria came over with a worried expression, scrunching her eyebrows and bending down to the girls' height.

"What's going on?" She asked worriedly. She saw the situation happen, and let's be honest she laughed, but she still didn't understand why Lila took the leaf and why Sasha hit her cousin on the head.

"Lila stole color!" Sasha pouted, pointing her finger at the traitor.

Lila looked appalled, "Sasha hit my head!"

Maria frowned, taking each of their hands. "Well, girls. Both of what you did wasn't nice, was it?"

Lila rolled her eyes. "Whatever," she mumbled out.

"No, not whatever, Lila." Maria replied. "You shouldn't have taken Sasha's leaves. But also Sasha shouldn't have hit your head."

"I sorry, Mommy!" Sasha said, taking her other hand and grabbing her mother's. Truthfully, she wasn't. But she wasn't going to say that to her mother, and she was going to be the favorite. Let's just not tell Maria that... Lila stole her leaf!

When Lila heard Sasha apologize first it pushed her into action, just as Sasha intended. That manipulative baby! "Me too, Auntie Masha! I'm more sorry!"

"No, me!" Sasha sent a glare towards her cousin. Lila wasn't going to win.

Maria rolled her eyes with a small grin. "It's alright, babies. Can I teach you something?"

"Huh?" Sasha groaned, taking her hands away and putting them on her hips.

"Can I tell you about colors?" Maria tried again.

'Lila mimicked Sasha's actions. "What mean, Auntie Masha?"

"Well, do you know why you guys have different colored leaves?" Maria smiled, holding out one red leaf and one brown.

The girls both shook their heads and Sasha quirked an eyebrow.

"Mommy. don't care!" Sasha grumbled out.

"...I care," Lila replied.

"Well then, Li. Every year the leaves change colors becau-"

"Bye, Auntie Masha!" Lila interrupted, pulling her cousin with her. "Sasha come onnnn."

Maria sighed, she loves her baby, but she won't complain when she's older.

⧗ⴵ🦅🛡

OCTOBER 31st, 2007
Warnings: slur

Natasha was excited for Halloween... until she realized there was no one to babysit Sasha. Though Sasha was legally both Natasha and Maria's, they were keeping their relationship private. As of late she was starting to question why, but she knows that the world around her sees her differently than her close nit group of friends. Maria is the closest, and no one can know that. No one can know that Sasha is just as much her's as she is Maria's. Because then people would start making assumptions, then her enemies would go after the loves of her life. But also, she's truly not ready for the SHIELD agents to find a new reason to hate her. For being a dyke. Which she wasn't, by the way. She knew she liked Maria when she was nineteen- god does that feel like ages ago. But when she knew, she knew with all her trauma, she still felt a pull towards men. So what was it, being attracted towards men and women? She didn't want to hear the rumors fly around yet, if ever. She didn't want to hear even more hate being slurred around, she already had enough of that. She didn't want her relation to Maria to affect her. So she's keeping it private, for as long as she needs to.

Natasha knelt down to Sasha, who was in her stroller. "I won't be able to talk to you a lot today, and I'm going to avoiding Mommy a bit, but I promise I'll make it up tonight!" She didn't even know if she'd be able to talk to her at all incase Sasha said 'Mama' or was too clingy. It wasn't safe.

Sasha's eyes furrowed. She reached out for her Mama, who gave her her hand. "Love you." She replied.

"I love you too, my baby." Natasha looked up at Maria. "Some day it will all be okay."

Maria gave a soft smile. "Someday."

⧗ⴵ🦅🛡

"Well, hello," Clint said to Natasha as she walked down in a tight red dress. He wasn't referring to her sex appeal.

"Hi," she replied with a colder response than intended.

"Already miss her?" he laughed, but added, "I get it though, I do. It's her first party and-"

"Clint, politely, keep your mouth shut."

"Sorry, Tasha-"

Her eyes narrowed as she cut him off. "Only Maria calls me that. You can call me Nat."

He pursed his lips, if he didn't know better he'd think it was that 'time of the month.' "Sorry, Nat."

She looked away from him, towards her girlfriend and daughter. Her eyes pierced souls, everything disappearing but her loves. Why'd it have to be this way? She had to be careful of how much she admired the heads Sasha turned. Of how fucking sexy Maria looked. Of how cold she acted, when she was stuck in a daze. She didn't want to talk to anyone except the one person she couldn't.

"Mommy, I want Mama," Sasha said quietly as she nuzzled her head into Maria's neck.

"Bugs," Maria replied, boosting Sasha higher in her arms. "Can we give Mama a codename for tonight?"

"Okayyy," Sasha mumbled. "What 'bout doggy?"

Maria closed her eyes for a second. "How about flower?"

"Noooo," she grumbled, then remembered; "I want Mamaaa."

"Sashy, I'm so sorry but we can't talk to her during this party."

"I want Mama." Sasha said again, this time with more force.

"Baby, please," Maria was desperate at this point. "I want her too, but for today it's just you and me."

"Nooooo!!"

"Sasha, please," Maria whispered, holding her daughter tighter before walking out towards the bathroom. She gave a quick glance to Natasha, and a few minutes later she was there in the bathroom holding her toddler close, kneeling down to be at her baby's height on the sink counter.

"Sasha, you have to understand, I'm not always going to be able to say hi at parties," Natasha said softly. "I wish I could, but it just doesn't work out that way. We have to keep it a secret I'm your Mama for now, is that ok?"

"No! I want you, Mama!" She threw a weak hit at her mother.

Natasha grabbed her hand. "We don't hit," she said sternly before laughing and adding. "At least, we don't hit in this context."

"Sorry." Sasha mumbled. Was she ever actually sorry though, I mean, She's Sasha Romanoff-Hill.

"It's okay, детка. Let's make it a game, ok? When we're at a party, if we don't talk the entire party you get a prize!" It pained both Natasha and Maria when hearing those words.

Sasha perked up though, which was good. "Okay!"

Natasha frowned, looking up at Maria. There was an understanding, a painful, nails on chalkboard understanding.

⧗ⴵ🦅🛡

DECEMBER 4th, 2007

There was another understanding between Maria and Natasha, that while they weren't able to celebrate any holiday, they'd give Sasha both. And by both, they meant the two major holidays surrounding December in the United States; Hanukkah and Christmas.

Fury was a bit shocked when he heard about their little plan, but not completely surprised. They would do anything for their daughter, they wanted to give her the world. They wanted to give her what they couldn't have, and they wanted to take what they couldn't have back. This was the perfect way of showing their freedom.

Natasha turned twenty-three yesterday, and so did the years her and Maria had been together for. Well, they'd like to imagine they'd been together for twenty-three years. Truthfully, it had only been three. But it felt like an eternity.

'I love you,' Tasha had said, and Maria quipped back with a smile on her face, 'wait until my birthday for that.' Her eyes could have been filled with hearts.

But today was the first of Hanukkah, and today they were reading the hand out guide on how to celebrate.

"No! Right to left!" Maria groaned as she watched Natasha light the candle. "God, Christmas is so much easier. You light the middle first, and then you light the farthest to the right!" This is their third year celebrating Hanukkah and they still don't have it down. Well, they mostly do, Natasha just forgets her lefts and rights sometimes. She's a spy, so note the sarcasm.

Natasha side-eyed Maria. "I'm trying here, Masha! But it's a bit hard considering you won't let me look at the guide!"

"Oh! You got it! Here, take Sasha! I'll sing the prayers!" Before Natasha could even reply her almost two year old daughter was in her arms.

"Hey!"

"Baruch atah, Adonai
Eloheinu, Melech haolam"

DECEMBER 25th, 2007

"Sasha, you get presents today! Go run on up to the tree, Santa came!" Maria encouraged, as she wakes Sasha up at six AM. If she gets these habits in young, maybe she won't wake her up in the following years to come.

"More presents?" Sasha gasped, clapping her hands as she sat up. "Han-uka ended!"

"Yes!" Maria said excitedly. "But remember we ate yummy food yesterday with the Barton's in our kitchen yesterday? Lila and Cooper get presents today too! But you're lucky, you get extra!"

"Yay!! I wanna see my present!"

"Alright, buggaboo, let's go see!"

On top of her playset and toy cars from Hanukkah (plus a bunch of clothes and dolls, and a kitchen set and more) Sasha got a new stuffed dog she named Barty, a new crayon set, yummy chocolates, a tent, and even more. We're not getting into all of them, we don't have time! Not all of them were from Maria and Natasha by the way!

⧗ⴵ🦅🛡

Natasha looked at Maria solemnly as she ate her sugar cookie. "I leave soon, I don't know when I'll be back."

Maria smiled, "we'll miss you, but I'm not stopping you. This is your defection to SHIELD, this is what you'll remember."

"I think I'm going to remember you, Hill." Nat said as she took Maria's hand and kissed it. "But I won't have to remember, you're never getting rid of me."

"How sweet. Let's enjoy these last few days before you and Barton head to Budapest."

Budapest. How that would haunt Natasha for forever.

<33

SORRY THIS IS SO LATE I'VE BEEN LAZY AND BUSY! BUT IT'S OUT!

TRANSLATIONS!:

любовь:
tranlation: lyubov'
meaning: love

детка:
translation: detka
meaning: baby [pet name]

Baruch atah, Adonai
Eloheinu, Melech haolam:
This is the beginning of a lot of Jewish prayers!
Although I'm Jewish I'm not religious or anything <3
This particular "Baruch..." is from the night 1 prayer of
Hanukkah (it's different on the first night!)