Time jump backwards:

Blood dripped off my chin and landed on my bare chest. It slowly slid down across my chest and tummy, a sickeningly beautiful contrast to my pale skin. Once it reached my tummy, I couldn’t stop my eye from straying to the dark bruises that littered my stomach and sides. They made me sick staring at them, made me remember how weak I truly was.

“Stop that,” Harry barked from across the room. I ripped my gaze away from my stomach and looked over at him. He was on his knees in front of the bath, one of his hands cupped under the clear stream of water that began to fill the tub.

“Stop what?” I asked him, even though I knew the answer. The muscles in my tummy twisted into knots when Harry glared over at me, giving me his warning look. But, instead of doing what he had intended it to do, it made me strangely aroused.

“Quit acting dumb, little einstein, and get over here,” he snapped, and I knew that he didn’t mean to make me cry, but I couldn’t stop the tears from collecting in my eyes. His eyes widened when he seen the tears start to trail down my cheeks, and he quickly stood to my feet. “Louis, baby, shh. I didn’t mean to make you cry,” he whispered, his eyes going into gooey orbs.

Small little tears soon turned into ugly fat ones and they just wouldn’t stop. I couldn’t make the bloody things stop falling, and I hated it. I was already weak enough to Harry without him seeing me like this, with red puffy eyes and tears mixed in with my blood. “You didn’t,” I said between my gasps of breaths.

I had never wanted to be like this in front of Harry, to be a sobbing mess that was literally falling apart in front of his eyes. “Then what’s wrong?” Two strong arms were wrapping around my waist and I was being lifted from the toilet before I was set down in his lap.

“I hate myself,” I managed to say, wanting nothing more than to pull away from Harry and hide, but my body betrayed me and turned into his. I hooked my arm under his shoulder and hugged him tightly against me, my face burying in the crook of his neck. I didn’t care about being cautious of my face. All I cared about was this awful feeling that was in the pit of my stomach.

“Louis,” it sounded like he wanted to say more, like he had planned on saying more, but much like me, it sounded like he had a ball lodged in the middle of his throat. That one simple word had so much pain laced in it that I had no idea who was hurting more. Me, or him. “Don’t say that,” once again, he sounded like he was in pain, like each word was forced past his constricting throat.

That only made me cry harder. My tears stained his skin and soaked his shirt, but he didn’t seem to care. His arms just stayed wrapped tightly around my body, and he stayed rocking me back and forth. Comforting words were whispered in my ears, words about how amazing I was and how beautiful I was, but I didn’t believe any of them. They were all lies. Nobody told me the truth but Seth, because he didn’t care if he hurt me or not.

Even after my tears stopped falling, I stayed clinging to Harry like my life depended on it. The white towel he once had slung over his shoulder was now on the floor, and there was a large wet spot on my pants from where Harry had grabbed me. We must have stayed there for a while, because by the time Harry situated me so I was cradled in his arms, his shirt was completely dry.

He set me down on the counter and ignored my protests as he peeled off my pants and socks. I realized that he wasn’t going to stop no matter what I said, so I slumped back against the mirror and watched through half open eyes as he threw my bunched up pants and underwear in the corner, followed by my socks.

“Come on, princess,” he whispered, the word making my insides twists and erupt in small butterflies. He slipped his arm under my legs and lifted me up, letting my head rest against his shoulder as he carried me across the bathroom before he gently set me down into the warm water. “Relax,”

He reached off to the side of me and got a small fluffy towel that he dipped into the water. I leaned back in the tub and let my lead like limbs sink into the water that eased my nerves and helped my pain. Gently, like a person who was washing a baby, Harry began to rub circles into my chest, turning to once white towel into a light pink one.

“You’ll be okay,” he whispered, and it wasn’t until then that I knew I would be. I would be okay, we would be okay. I knew that I would be completely fine if I had Harry, because without him, I wouldn’t have made it through this school year.

Present:

Sunlight poured down on me, and my skin eagerly soaked in the rare vitamin D. “Louis, dear, would you like a breakfast muffin before Harry takes you home?” Anne called from the doorway. I smiled to myself because wow, this woman was far too kind.

“Aww, thanks love, but i’ll be fine,” I said, turning around to face her and having to cup my hand over my eyes to even get a good look at her. I felt queasy even thinking about eating one more bite of food, considering Anne had already made me eat an entire bowl of some weird breakfast casserole thing.

She pouted, which I would have known even if I wouldn’t have been able to see her, before she shoved the brown paper bag under her arm, which I was assuming held a few muffins in it. “Fine, but call us if you need anything!” she reminded me for only the thirtieth time today. I nodded and promised her I would, even though I probably would never call her even if I was on my death bed. Nothing against her, I just hate asking for help.

Anne huffed and went to go back inside, but Harry walked out just as she was getting ready to walk in. “Take this and make sure that boy eats it. He’s too small,” I heard Anne hiss to Harry before she shoved the bag into his arms. I laughed loudly and watched with a smile as Harry rolled his eyes, took the bag, and jogged down the stairs.

We both climbed into the car, and after promising Anne i’d come to visit her soon, we were pulling out of the driveway. “That woman,” Harry said under his breath. He shook his head and glanced in the rearview mirror to make sure nobody was behind him before he finished backing up.

“Is lovely,” I said, peeking into the bag Harry had handed me. Sure enough, there were three large blueberry muffins in the bag, and underneath them was a small clear bowl with some of the casserole from this morning in it. “Want a muffin?” I asked Harry, but scoffed as soon as I did. I didn’t know why I bothered asking him if he wanted food, because he always did. The little shit was always hungry.

“Feed me,” he said, rather than saying a yes or no. I rolled my eyes and grabbed a muffin out of the bag, then peeled back the paper lining. They smelled divine, and, because I promised Anne I would eat one, I took a small bite of it. The blueberries were tart, but the amount of sugar she had put in them seemed to level it out and make it absolutely delicious.

“Mmmm,” I moaned, licking my bottom lip to collect some of the crumbs. As I was chewing, I leaned over and lifted to muffin up to Harry’s lips, watching as he devoured half the muffin in one bite. “Jesus,” I said, looking down at the poor thing in horror.  “He was gone too soon,” I held my free hand against my chest and made my chin quiver.

“Oh shut up and feed me more,” I laughed, but did as he said and with two more bites, the muffin was gone and crumbs were littering his lap.

“It’s a very crumby day,” I said, nudging Harry with my elbow. He rolled his eyes and I burst out laughing because jesus, was I funny or was I funny?

“You are oh so hilarious,” he said, obviously unamused which made me laughed harder. My stomach hurt and I felt like I couldn’t breath, but I couldn’t stop laughing. This was far too amusing to me, and I had no idea why. It was just a stupid pun.

I managed to calm down, and once I did, I made a scene of wiping away the fake tears from underneath my eyes and flicking them off before I rolled the bag up and set it between my legs on the floor.

“Do you really have to go home?” Harry asked me when he turned down the street my house was on. I sighed, and wanted to tell him no, but I didn't. I had to go home. I haven’t been at home for over two weeks, well, except to get clothes and a few other things.

“I really have to,” I mumbled, tugging at the end of mine, well Harry’s, shirt. It was a light blue one that was small enough that it didn’t completely drown me, but it was still big on me.

“It’s not like they care if you’re there or not,” he mumbled under his breath, but it was just loud enough for me to hear. I don’t know why, but I felt hurt that he would say that. I mean, I know that my mom and sister doesn’t care if i’m there or not, but it just hurt to have someone else point it out to me.

“Yeah, well, just because they don’t miss me doesn’t mean I don’t miss them,” I snapped, fighting back my tears. I didn’t miss my mom so much, but I did Lottie. We may only get along when I am high out of my mind, but she was still my sister and one of the few people I had left in my life. “But thanks for reminding me my family doesn’t care about me.” My tears falling was inevitable now.

“That’s not what I meant,” Harry sighed as he pulled up infront of my house. I ignored him and climbed out of the car, my eyes glancing at the brown paper bag but I didn’t grab it.

I closed the door and looked through the window at Harry. “Goodbye, Harry,” I said when the window began to retreat into the door. Waving at him one last time, I turned around and ran up my old, worn out stairs, tears blurring my vision.

I could hear Harry yelling after me, but just as I was closing the door, I seen his car speed off. I leaned back against the door and took in a deep breath, trying to steady my heavy breathing and rapidly beating heart. I hated how something so simple had hurt me so much, and it wasn’t like he was even trying to hurt me.

Shaking my head, I pushed up off the door and walked a little further into the house. The entire house was swallowed in darkness and the old washing and drying machine was heard clanking obnoxiously loud in the bathroom. There was no other noise in my house except that, and I began to grow worried until I heard the clank of a bottle falling to the ground, followed by my mother cursing.

Great, she’s already drunk.

I took in a deep breath and walked through my house that seemed even smaller now since I had spent so long in Harry’s mansion sized house. The floorboards creaked under my feet, and I had to admit I missed the sound. It might annoy other people, but after having spent so long in this house, these small noises comforted me.

“Mom?” I asked quietly, my knuckles raking against her door. When I got no response, I grabbed the small, metal doorknob that had many chips and dents in it, and turned it quietly. The door squeaked as I pushed it open, but it wasn’t loud enough to bother my mom. I peeked my head into the room and seen a small figure on the bed, curled up in my mom’s old blanket. Her room smelled like dust and alcohol, the mixture having my nose itch and my stomach churn.

“Mom?” I repeated, looking around her room before I crept over to her bed and set down on the edge of it. I placed my hand on the person’s hip and shook them gently, trying to wake them up. I was a little confused because I had just heard her bottle fall against the floor, which was now nudging against the top of my shoe, but all my confusion vanished when the person rolled over and smiled at me, all their teeth gone but their three bottom ones and one on top.

“Hi beautiful,” he murmured, his voice thick and raspy, but not in the attractive way. I jumped off the bed and took a step back, fear striking through my body.

“Who are you?” I asked, my voice shaking. The guy’s brown eyes snapped open and looked at me in confusion for a second before his features were over ridden with anger.

“Stupid bitch told me she didn’t have a boyfriend,” he growled, his legs kicking against the blankets as he struggled to get out of them. I began to walk backward, my hand behind me in search of a wall or something.

He finally got free and stood up from the bed, the only thing covering his hairy body was a thin piece of boxers, but they didn’t even do a good job. “Who the fuck are you?” he asked, his lips pulling back and revealing his yellowish teeth. I had an uneasy feeling in my stomach, one that was telling me to turn around and run away, but I was frozen in place.

“I-I’m her son,” I squeaked out, only managing to get those words out before he took three large steps towards me. He reeked of b.o and alcohol with a strong hint of urine. I felt my breakfast making it’s way up my throat, but I swallowed thickly and forced it down.

“She only has that stoner bitch of a daughter,” he said, taking another step forward, and I took a step back. Shaking my head frantically, I took another step, desperate to get out of here. I was just now feeling better after my body being pummeled by Seth. I didn’t need one of my mom’s crack head boyfriends to beat me up again.

“No, I… LEAVE ME ALONE!” I scream loudly when he grabbed my arm with his callous covered fingers. Track marks littered his arms and the back of his hands, and his face was covered in pick marks, signaling he was going through withdrawls.

“Don’t fuckin….” The door slammed open and before I could register what was happening, my arm was being yanked forward because the guy was being tackled to the ground.

Blood began to drip from my arm from the guy’s fingernails digging into it, but I was more focused on the boy with black hair that had the other man’s arms pinned on either side of him. “What did I tell you about touching her kids?” the black haired boy asked, the lower half of his body pressing down on my moms boyfriends lower half, trying to hold him still.

But when did Zayn meet this guy? And when did he lay a hand on Lottie? A new topic on my mind, I ran out of my mom’s room and up to Lottie’s, leaving Zayn and the creeper wrestling on my mom’s floor, but i’m pretty sure the younger boy would win it without even trying.

I barged into her room, finding her sitting on her bed, a pipe held to her lips. She looked over at me, her bloodshot eyes peeking just above the top of her elephant shaped pipe. “Lou!” she shouted, dropping everything on her bed before she ran to me and wrapped me in a hug.

I sighed and hugged her back, her familiar body fitting with mine perfectly, but not as perfectly as Harry's did. I pulled back first so I could examine her body, and I was just about to give up until I seen the large hand shaped bruise on her arm, almost hidden underneath the sleeve of her shirt. “Jenson’s an asshole,” she said and shrugged when I looked up at her and silently asked her for an answer.

I didn’t know who Jenson was, but I was guessing he is my mom’s new boyfriend. “Where’s Zayn?” she asked as she sat back down on her bed and resumed what she had been doing.

“Has Jenson pinned to mom’s floor,” I said, walking over to her bed and sitting next to her. She offered me the pipe after she took her hit, and no matter how tempting it looked and smelled, I didn’t take it. I promised Harry last week I would stop doing that, unless it was with him, and I planned on keeping that promise.

“So, how’s lover boy?” she asked, waggling her eyebrows which had both me and her laughing.

“Good, good. He’s a little mad at me right now,” I said, sighing when I remembered how we left off. I looked down at the pipe between her legs and it became more and more tempting, but then I reminded myself that if Harry found out, he would take away the fluffy dog stuffy he got me not too long ago.

Rolling her eyes, Lottie lifted to pipe back up to her lips and took another hit before asking, with smoke filled lungs, “When aren’t they?” I laughed and shrugged.

“How are you and Zayn?” I asked her before she could ask anything else about me and Harry. I may love Lottie, and I may be completely comfortable around her, but I didn’t like talking about my relationship. I felt like what me and Harry did, or how we were, was between the two of us. Not the two of us and everybody else.

“Oh god, I think he broke my vagina,”

“How the hell do you break a vagina?”

“You play with it too much,” she winked at me and leaned across me so she could set her lighter and things on her nightstand table. I gagged and acted like I was revolted, but I was actually happy for her. She has been so used to just fucking guys because she felt like nobody would love her, so I was happy she found someone like Zayn.

And, speaking of the devil, he came walking into the room just as Lottie set back down. Her eyes went soft and mushy, and so did his, until he ripped his love filled gaze away from her and looked at me. “Hey, Lou.”

I nodded in acknowledgment, but didn’t say anything. “You okay?” he asked, and I just nodded again. Was it supposed to be this awkward when you were in a room with your sister and her boyfriend?

Scratching the back of his head, Zayn nodded and pursed his lips, a look of guilt forming on his face. “What?” Lottie and I asked in unison, both of us glancing at each other with a smile before we looked back at Zaynie boi.

“Your mom is kinda really pissed and wants us to leave for the day,” he said, his tongue ring slipping between his teeth.

“Well, I can just go to your house,” Lottie said, and great. At least she knew where she was going.

“You can come too, if you’d like,” Zayn said, looking at me and I debated on whether or not I wanted to, but then my phone began to ring in my pocket. I held up a finger and fished it out, then rolled my eyes when I seen Harry’s name lighting up the screen. He calls at all the right times, doesn't he? I sighed and answered the phone, then lifted it up to my ear. I was expecting to get yelled at for acting the way I had in the car, so I readied myself.

“Hey, princess,” Harry said, making me blush lightly. He had started to call me that ever since he helped me bathe that one night, but I was still trying to get used to it.

I turned away from Lottie and Zayn and smiled into the phone. “Hia,” I mumbled.

“Listen, i’m sorry about the way I acted,” Harry said, and I went to respond, but someone yelled ‘Harry, tell Louis what I told you to,’ I smiled because I instantly recognized Anne’s voice, but then I began to feel a little worried because what did she want Harry to tell  me?

“Mum” which is how he refers to Anne when speaking to me now, “Wants to know if you would like to come over and have dinner here.” I rolled my eyes. This woman worried way too much, especially about me eating, but then I remembered my current situation.

“I would love to!” I said, then added, “even though I literally just left,” Harry laughed into the phone, then told his mum who squealed in delight.

“Tell him we…” Anne began. “I’LL BE OVER IN A FEW MINUTES,” Harry shouted into the phone, trying to be heard above Anne’s, and just before the line went dead, I heard Anne yell, “Damn you Harry,”

I chuckled and shook my head, then put my phone back into my pocket and turned to look at the couple that was now sitting on the bed together. “So?” Lottie asked, her hand running up and down Zayn’s chest. Her head was resting on his shoulder and his arm was around her waist, his chin resting on her head.

“Thanks for the offer, but someone’s coming to pick me up,” I said, standing up from the bed. I looked down at my arm and seen there was still blood oozing out of the wounds, the fresh blood sliding over the dry blood.

“Oh lover boy!” Lottie shouted, her footsteps following after me as I walked into my room and grabbed an old shirt I could use for my cuts. I grabbed an old raggedy white one and held it over my arm as I walked down the stairs, ignoring her ridiculous comments about me and Harry. Both her and Zayn followed me out of the house and down the steps, all three of us standing together in a circle on the lawn.

“Is his cock big?” Lottie suddenly asked, forgetting she was supposed to be singing that one song from ‘Dirty Dancing’. I choked on my saliva and looked at her with wide eyes.

“That is none of your business.”

“He does, doesn’t he!?!”

“No, Lots, you’re forgetting. Poor little Lou here is still a virgin. Probably doesn’t even know what a cock is,” Zayn said, his elbow nudging me. He winked at me, then walked over to Lottie and wrapped his arm around her shoulders.

I wanted to tell them that I wasn’t a virgin, but Lottie knew when I lied, so I kept my mouth shut long enough for me to think of something to say. “I know what a weiner is,” I huffed, crossing my arms over my chest, making it so the injured one was on top.

Both of them laughing, Lottie began to pat Zayn’s chest as little snorts escaped past her nose. “Weiner!” She shouted when she got a small little break from laughing, but that word had them laughing more.

“Oh fuck off, both of you,” I growled, turning my back on them. I heard Zayn say something about me being able to say fuck, but not cock.

I rolled my eyes and ignored them, deciding that if they were going to be assholes I wasn’t going to talk to them. “Alright mate, ‘m sorry.” Zayn said, patting my shoulder but I pulled away from him.

“Don’t touch me,” I grumbled, still pouting. I didn’t like it when people made fun of me for being so innocent when it came to things like that. It wasn’t until a few months ago that I was even comfortable thinking the word cock, let alone saying it. And I wasn’t all that innocent. I mean, i’ve practically air humped a guy because I was so fucking horny.

“We’ll leave you and Harry alone,” Zayn said, and when I looked up at him, I could see how hard he was trying to hold back his laughter, but I knew he meant it.

“Fine,” I sighed, “But I do know what a cock is,” I clarified, blushing lightly when the word left my mouth.

Zayn stifled his laughter, and when I glared at him, he just lifted up both of his arms, like he was saying he surrendered, and took a step back. I huffed and glanced down at my arm. The shirt was now a deep red color in patches from my blood. I carefully, or as carefully as I could, pulled the shirt up. Biting down harshly on my tongue, I ignored the tears that pricked my eyes as the shirt pulled at the fresh wounds, and threw the bloody material down to the ground.

I wished Harry was here, because shockingly enough, he was good with things like this. I didn't care to know why, though. I'd rather that stay a mystery. “Lemme see,” Zayn said, and I didn’t have a chance to protest before he was grabbing my arm and flipping it over so he could see each scratch. “He just barely popped through the skin, but your arm will be sore for a while,”

I rolled my eyes because even I knew that. “Thanks,” I said, going to pull my arm back but a black car slowly creeping up behind Zayn had my body erupting in butterflies. “Harry!” I shouted, waving at him as he pulled up to the curb and stepped out of the car.

My eyes widened when I seen what he was wearing. He had on loose basketball shorts that just reached his knees, a black tank-top and a white bandana. “Oh shit,” I breathed out, pushing Lottie away when she looked at me and grinned.

“What happened?” Harry asked me as he came to a stop by my side, his eyes flickering from my arm, to Zayn’s hand that was still around it, and up to Zayn. I knew this was making Harry upset, so I quickly pulled my arm out of Zayn’s hold and lifted it up so Harry could see the four long scratch marks.

“Mom got a new boyfriend,” I said, my skin bursting into flames when Harry lightly grabbed my arm and looked over the wounds.

“We’ll need to clean you up when we get back h…” Harry suddenly paused, “Wait, your mom’s boyfriend did this?” His eyes darkened and his hand was no longer holding my arm, it now being clenched into a fist at his side.

“Harry, no. Zayn already dealt with it,”

“Oh he did, did he now?” Oops, shouldn’t have said that. “Tell me, Zayn, what did you do?”

I could feel the anger radiating off of Harry, but I had to admit it was kinda hot the way his face slowly fell apart and revealed the dark mask he always wore. “I tackled him to the ground and told him to stop,” Zayn said modestly, shrugging like it was no big deal.

I wanted to tell Harry that Zayn did more than just tackled him to the ground, but that was probably the worst possible thing I could do. Nodding, Harry began to run his finger along his bottom lip.

“And… He is still walking?”

“What? Of course. I’m not going to beat the shit out of the guy,”

“I would have,” pausing, Harry looked away from Zayn and stared down at me, “I still might.”

I shook my head and grabbed his arm, desperately clinging onto his arm because I thought he really was going to go into the house. “Please, don’t,” I pleaded, ignoring the way Lottie and Zayn’s eyes burned holes into my body. “I’m fine, I promise,”

His eyes searching over my body to look for any new bruises or anything, he breathed deeply through his nose and nodded slightly. “Fine,”

I mouthed a thank you, then turned and looked at Lottie. “Harry, do I know what a cock is?” I suddenly blurted out, completely changing the topic away from the creep that was staring at us through the small window in the frontroom.

“I don’t know. Do you know what that thing was that you were riding last night?” Harry asked, smirking when he got three different reactions. I swatted his chest, Lottie gasped and Zayn laughed.

“He wishes we had sex last night,” I said to Zayn and Lottie, rather than Harry. “But yes, I know what a cock is. Tell them, Harry. They were making fun of me,”

Putting one arm around me, Harry drug me to his side and kissed my forehead. “He knows what a cock is, not that it’s any of your business.” Leaning down so his mouth was by my ear, “I’m hoping you will ride me tonight,” he breathed into my ear. I squirmed against him and flushed as I imagined what it would feel like to not only have sex for the first time, but to ride Harry on his huge bed.

Pushing the image down, I squirmed once again and inhaled deeply. “Anne is expecting us, I think it’s time to go,” Before anyone could tell me goodbye or say anything else, I was grabbing a hold of Harry’s hand and pulling him towards his car.

“What are you doing?” Harry asked when I walked him around to my side.

“Helping you open my door,” I said, not caring that it made me seem like a helpless little boy who had to have his door opened for him, because I knew I wasn’t. I could open my own door, but I just prefered it if Harry did. It made me feel special.

Harry gave me a weird look, but opened my door for me nonetheless and helped me into my seat. Making sure all my limbs were in the car, he closed my door carefully and walked around to his side. I watched his small butt in his shorts, groaning at the way the material became tight around each cheek with every step forward.

“BYE LOU LOU!” Lottie yelled just before Harry closed his door. I leaned forward and waved at them, then set back in my seat and done up my seatbelt.

“You are rude,” I said to Harry, the click of my seat belt being buckled following shortly after.

“What?” Pause, laugh, “Why am I rude?” Ignores me completely as he drives down the road, which is honestly what I prefer.

“You were teasing me,” I whined, tugging at my pants that had grown just a tad bit too tight.

Pausing at the stoplight, Harry turned to look at me with a half smirk. “Who said I was teasing?”

S/O to hqppypie for being such an awesome reader that has me dying with each comment!

And S/O to my wifey 1DLARRYLover1234 for everything she does for me. Without her, this story would have been over before it even began.