Chapter 38: This Love

"Brod may topic ka na ba? Shet, wala pa akong idea hanggang ngayon. Baka maubusan ako ng topic..." Sinasabunutan ni James yung ulo niya at mukhang problemado. " 'To parang walang problema ah."

"Nag-iisip pa lang. Sa Monday pa naman yung pasahan ng proposal," I replied as I busied myself with my problem set. Walang magagawa ang pag-wo-worry at baka lalo pa akong magka-mental block. Iisipin ko na lang munang matapos yung kaya kong tapusin. My thesis needs full attention kapag wala na akong ibang iniisip. I vowed kila Mama na gra-graduate ako on time and I'm going to make good on that promise.

I pulled my concentration back dun sa susunod na number. Apat na lang ang hindi ko nasasagutan. There's twenty minutes before my next class so I judged the time to be enough para hindi ako ma-late, tutal kaunting lakad lang naman papuntang Eng'g mula dito sa tambayan namin na nasa tabi ng Main Lib.

"Prince Constantino?" I looked up and froze.

Oh shet, anong ginagawa niya rito?

"Bro, mauna na 'ko ha," James patted my shoulder at napatingin ako sa kanya. Shet, traydor!

Naupo siya sa harap ko at hindi ko alam kung paano mag-re-react. My throat suddenly felt dry.

"Tita Mariz..."

"I thought of contacting you sooner pero nasa ospital ka daw," she sat down on the bench opposite mine. I've only met her a few times pero ibang-iba ang hitsura niya ngayon. She looked like she aged ten years since the last time I saw her.

"My daughter wants to see you." She said simply. Walang paligoy-ligoy. She's the kind of woman who is used to getting what she wants. Napabuntong-hininga ako.

"I'm sorry Tita," I want to be truthful. Seeing me again would give her hope. Ito ang natutunan ko sa conversations namin ni Aya. It's more cruel na paasahin ko siya samantalang wala na akong feelings para sa kanya.

"Don't make me beg, Prince." Even in her misery, she clung to her pride like a lifeline.  

"I don't think ako ang kailangan niya. She needs professional help."

"Sinasabi mo bang nababaliw ang anak ko?!" Her face darkened with fury.

"Tita, I think kayo po ang kailangan niya. Matagal niya na po kayong hinihintay," Her slap was so sudden na hindi agad nag-register sa akin yung hapdi. She looked really shaken at nagbabadya ang mga luha sa kanyang mata.

"Walanghiya ka. Tinuturuan mo ba ako kung paano maging magulang sa anak ko?"

"Pasensya na po kayo, hindi po sa ganoon ang gusto kong sabihin pero alam ko pong kung ako ang nasa lagay niya, magulang ko po ang una kong lalapitan." Natigilan siya at tinignan ako ng masama. Hindi na niya tinatago yung luha niya sa mata. Naawa ako sa kanya pero ayokong magpadala. Ayoko sa lahat ang babaeng umiiyak pero mas nananaig sa akin yung mukha ni Aya na umiiyak. Sorry, pero mas hindi ko yata kaya na siya ang umiyak for other people's whims. "Ayoko pong umasa siya."

"Pasensya na po, may klase pa po ako." I stood up, gathered my papers,  and excused myself. 

"Prince," I heard her call my name once more and I stopped. "Talaga bang hinihintay niya ko?"

"Opo Tita, na-mi-miss na po niya kayo."

-----------------

"Bakit ang haba ng nguso mo?" Pabagsak na umupo sa tabi ko si Issa. Last class na namin at atat na akong makauwi.

"Yung immersion kasi natin third monthsary namin ni Prince." Nung in-announce kanina ni Prof ang schedule ng immersion namin for Anthro 1 sa Zambales ay nalungkot ako.

"Hashtag love problems pala," Natatawa niyang sabi at ginulo ang buhok ko. Napa-buntong hininga ako.

"Saklap."

"Di bale, three days lang naman. Para ma-miss niyo naman ang isa't-isa," she chided me and I stuck my tongue out at her. "Gabi-gabi naman siya nasa inyo di ba? Grabe ka girl, di ba nagagalit sila mommy mo?"

I shook my head, "hindi naman. Si mommy nagsabi na dun kami sa bahay. Hanggang 10PM lang naman siya pwede. Saka mas kampante din sila kuya."

"Wow ang swerte naman ng boyfie mo. Kung sa amin yan, naku baka sermon ang abot ko kay Papa."

"Sabi ni mommy, mas mabuti na daw yung sa bahay siya magpunta kaysa kung saan-saan ako dinadala." I pulled out my copy of Neil Gaiman's The Ocean at the End of the Lane para magbasa muna habang naghihintay sa susunod na class.

"Hi Aya, Issa..." may umupo sa kabilang tabi ko. I glanced casually and saw Jonathan Arroyo, yung shiftee galing Devt. Stud na ka-group namin sa Anthro 1. Matipid akong ngumiti bago bumalik sa pagbabasa.

"Hi Nathan," I glanced at Issa at todo-ngiti siya. Crush niya 'tong si Jonathan at siya ang nagyaya na sumama ito sa grupo namin ni Mitch para makumpleto yung requirement na apat per group.

"Hi Issa," he smiled back at her. "Ano nga palang plan natin for the project?" Tinutukoy niya yung immersion namin.

"May guide questions naman sa module. Susundan lang natin yun. Meron nga lang additional topic na dapat nating i-tackle," Hala 'tong si Issa napaghahalata ang sparkle sa mata.

"Ikaw Aya, anong gusto mong topic?" Nathan leaned on my shoulder to look at my book. Medyo nakadikit na siya sa mukha ko kaya ramdam ko yung hininga niya. "Gaiman fan ka?"Ugh. Medyo umusog ako palayo. Ang FC!

I nodded at him, "We can tackle about their family system. Or kung gusto niyo mas simple, yung marriage system nila."

"Yeah, we can make a survey and conduct interviews or FGDs (focused group discussion)." Sinesenyasan ako ni Issa. Hay naku Issa, palit na tayo ng lugar at kinikilabutan ako dito!

"Hey, you guys have plans later?" I lifted an eyebrow. Nako koya, ang obvious mo di masyadong halata.

"Ako wala. What do you have in mind?" Literal na lumipat na si Issa sa kabilang tabi ni Nathan. Okaaay...

"Manlilibre ako ng dinner," he grinned at me.

"Yes! Sabi mo yan ha?" Issa gushed and punched him lightly on the arm. "Hindi ako tatanggi."

He's still looking at me. Ano ba 'to? Di ba siya nakakaramdam? "May date kami ng boyfriend ko." I said simply and his expression fell. Bumukas na yung pinto ng classroom at nagpasalamat ako. Sa wakas. I closed my book and stood up.     

Hinintay namin na makalabas lahat nung estudyante bago kami pumasok sa room. Agad akong kinapitan ni Issa. "Girl ang gwapooo..." I rolled my eyes upward at kinurot niya ako sa tagiliran. "Kainis ka. Alam ko kanina pa siya nakatingin sa'yo noh. Thank God may Prince ka na kaya akin na lang siya." Humaigali, loka-loka rin 'tong si Issa!

"Iyong-iyo na. Happy na ko kay Prince ko."

"Ikaw panira," she pouted at me. "Pero ang cute-cute niya di ba? "

"Okay lang," I answered glumly.

"Hay naku girl wag ka nang malungkot diyan. Di ka ba happy for me? May date ako mamaya!" Kinindatan niya ako. "Sana ito na ang simula ng aking love life..." she looked dreamy at nakunsensya naman ako.

"Good luck," I tried to smile pero nasa utak ko pa rin yung monthsary naming masasagasaan ng immersion. Nag-vibrate yung cellphone ko and I checked my messages.

Alfred <3 Nii-chan: Sama kayo ni Prince tomorrow. Clark Speedway. 5AM alis tau.

Me: Ok po. <3 

"O, good mood ka na. Si Prince?" She nudged me.

I shook my head, "Si Kuya Alfred. May tournament siya bukas sa Clark, pinapasama kami ni Prince."

"Wow, ikaw na talaga. Tanggap na tanggap ah."

Natawa ako, "actually kay Kuya Alfred pinakanahirapan si Prince. Sobrang protective kasi nun, as in."

"Hindi naman sinagasaan si Prince?" She joked.

"Grabe ka!" I couldn't suppress my smile."Naninindak lang yun. Mas nakakatakot si Kuya Ali. Nambubugbog lang si Kuya Alfred pag may nananakit sa amin."

The professor entered at natigil ang daldalan namin ni Issa. In the middle of the discussion a crumpled piece of paper landed on my armchair. I looked behind me and saw Nathan grinning. I turned back to face the board when I felt him nudge my chair with his foot. Hindi ko pinansin pero inulit niya kaya lumingon ako at tinignan siya ng masama. Inginuso niya yung papel. I sighed and opened up the note.

See you tomorrow. Smile ka naman babe.

Kinilabutan ako but I suppressed my annoyance. Kaasar din 'tong isang to, ang epal! Kating-kati na akong umuwi at nagpati-una na ako na makalabas ng classroom pagka-dismiss nang prof. I felt someone tug my arm at di ko napigil ang sarili ko. Nainis ako nang makita ko kung sino.

 "Wag ka ngang feelingero," I pulled my arm out of his grasp. "stop following me. I could report you for harassment." After what happened with Hernandez, I'm more wary of guys who feel a little too close for comfort.

"Whoa, feisty..." he let go of me immediately. "Ang sungit mo naman babe. Ano bang ginawa ko sa'yo?"

"Look, I'm not interested--" I started to say but he put a finger on my lips. 

"We'll that's too bad because I am very interested in you."

---------------------

I put down the pencil and stretched my cramped fingers. I glanced at the clock, 11PM. The nurse would be here anytime at pagagalitan na naman ako for staying up late. Pero batong-bato na talaga ako dito sa ospital. I tried watching DVDs all day pero masakit na yung ulo ko after a week of doing nothing but that. Na-mi-miss ko na yung mga kabarkada ko sa basketball at lalong-lalo na yung kulitan namin na magkakapatid. Nagpapalitan sila ng pagbisita since they are busy with school and work at naiintindihan ko naman. It's simply not enough. I have too much energy and I'm itching to go move my body. I can't believe I'm looking forward to physical exhaustion.

Buti sana kung kagaya ako ng ibang pasyente na pwedeng lumabas para maglakad-lakad pero the doctor said I should stay inside the burn unit dahil baka maimpeksyon ako. One more month.

Masisiraan yata ako ng bait.    

I've been reprimanded for doing practical jokes on the nurses and doctors. The best one was when I mixed my pomegranate juice with my pee. They were at a panic at akala nila nag-breakdown na yung kidneys ko dahil may maling gamot silang naibigay. Naloloka sila kapag pinagpapalit-palit ko yung mga tags ng gamot at pag fini-fill-out ko yung chart on my own. Once, I filled out the charts with doodles at kahit pinipilit magseryoso nung doctor ay natawa pa rin siya lalo na dun sa caricature ko ng head nurse.

The best part is hindi nila ako pwedeng batukan unlike Kuya Alfred. The perks of being a patient.

Ang tagal naman niyang dumating. I sighed. Gabi kung bumisita si Red. Kapag akala niya tulog na ko, doon siya pumapasok sa kwarto through the window. Tapos nakaupo lang siya dun sa pasimano. Feeling ko tuloy ako si Kaoru at siya si Kenshin. Baliktad ano? Pero yung mga oras na yun ang pinaka-ina-anticipate ko the whole day. Those silent moments where I watch her watching me.

Ang cute talaga ng baby cake ko.

Bumukas ang pinto. "Mr. Zabala hindi ka pa rin natutulog," Nakasimangot si Nurse Anna pero alam kong kinikilig siya kapag ngumingiti ako. Naririnig ko silang nag-uusap nung ibang nurses pag nagtutulug-tulugan ako. Nag-s-spin the bottle pa nga sila kung sinong susunod na mag-che-check sa akin.   

"Eto matutulog na," I grinned up at her. She blushed prettily. "Hindi mo ba ako ipaghehele?" I pouted.

"Ikaw talaga sir!" She slapped my shoulder hard and I flinched. Shet ang saket!

"Naku sir sorry po, kayo naman kasi..." she fussed over me at maluha-luha ako sa nangyari. She adjusted my bed and took my sketchpad and pencils away. "Matulog na po kayo. Good night."

"Takot ako, baka may moo moo..." I said in a little boy voice.

"Naku sir, kayo talaga puro biro." She fanned her face with her hand and smiled at me while batting her lashes. She turned the night light on and the main lights off. The room became flooded with a light bluish tint.

Any minute now.

In another heartbeat she slid inside the window that I purposely left open. Soundless as a shadow.

I drank her in. I so badly want to touch her, trace her face, her lips... hold her hand but she's like a shy wild creature. Pag nagsalita ako aalis siya.

So I kept quiet. The last thing I want is to scare her away.

She stared at me beneath her fringe of long, dark lashes. If I touch them, would they be as soft as I imagined them to be?

'Tangna Aidan, nagiging makata ka na dahil sa confinement mo.

Nakataas ang isang kilay niya at halatang naiirita despite her efforts to keep a straight face. Kilala ko na yung facial expressions niya from her nightly visits. I spend hours watching her while she just sits by my bedside. The first few times umaalis siya kapag kinakausap ko directly kaya hindi ko na in-attempt ulit.

Why do you have to be so damn difficult, Red?

Pero ako na ang baliw kasi lalo akong nag-e-effort na mapansin niya kahit lagi niya akong iniiwan. Tuwing hindi niya ako pinapansin, mas lalo akong pursigidong magtagal siya sa aking piling. Pati nga si Kuya Ali pineste ko na sa vacation niya para lang makuha yung number ni Red pero kahit libong text na 'ata na-send ko di man lang nag-reply kahit isa.

Tonight she chose to sit beside my bed. My breath hitched when she made herself comfortable  beside me.

Okay, bago 'to ah. I've never been this close to her since that night when she cleaned my wounds. Pinigilan ko ang sarili ko na magsalita, pero shet ang hirap. Nung bata pa ako sabi ng nanay ko pinanganak daw akong maingay at di mapigil yung bunganga ko kakadaldal. I was shocked when she flicked my ear!

"Landi mo," the remark caught me off-guard. Pero di ko mapigilan yung ngiti ko nung mag-register sa akin yung sinabi niya. Nagseselos ba ang baby cake ko? Tae, kinikilig ako.

She picked up my sketchpad and I panicked. Oh, crap. Tiyak aalis 'to. Napalunok ako when she flipped open the cover.

Please wag mo ihampas sa akin yan.

Or okay lang ihampas mo sa ulo ko pero wag ka umalis.

But surprisingly she had a soft smile on her lips as she slowly flipped more pages. She stopped at the latest page that I've been working on. Naramdaman kong pinagpawisan ako ng malapot. Eto  na, dasal ka na Aidan dahil katapusan mo na.

And the weirdest thing happened. She picked up my pencil and began sketching. I sat there mesmerized as she worked. I didn't dare break her concentration. She looked so serious working... mas nakaka-in-love.

Hindi ko na namalayan na nakatulog ako. I woke up with the sun shining on my eyes. Napabalikwas ako and my sketchpad fell on the floor along with my pencils.

"Ah, crap" I slid down and picked it up. Ano kayang ginawa ni Red sa drawing ko?

The sketchpad almost fell from my hands when I saw what she drew.

What the hell?

I closed my eyes and hugged the sketchpad to my chest. I could feel a sting on the corners of my eyes.

"Good morning kuya," Adam came inside the room, "musta? Sayang di ka pa makakalabas. Sama sana tayo sa tournament ni Kuya Alfred." He waved a hand in front of my face.

"Kuya?" He looked bewildered. "Anong nahithit mo at mukha kang high?"

"Sabi ko sa'yo eh." I slapped the sketchpad on his chest. He looked at the page and his jaw dropped.

It was a sketch of Red and me--

kissing. 

And beneath it,

Lumandi ka pa at puputulan talaga kita.

-Red

---------------

"Hi," Alam kong para akong tangang kinikilig. Well, kapag isang Alfredo Zabala ang susundo sa'yo, aba'y malalaglag na ang lahat ng pwedeng malaglag. 

Trixie malala ka na talaga.

"Ready ka na?" He got out of his vehicle, an orange Chevrolet Camaro. "Lagay natin 'to sa compartment." He took one crate of my equipment while I took the other at inilagay ito sa likod ni Lady. I'm not gonna deny na excited ako for this trip. Lahat na nga ng ibang mga kasama kong agents inaasar ako sa office kasi lutang daw ako. Muntik ko na ngang malagyan ng tubig yung makina ni Barney kung hindi lang ako napigilan ni Shanvie nung isang araw.

"Hi, I'm not late right?" A breathless Jem arrived at the shop at natigilan ako.

What the hell?!

"You're just in time," He replied and gave her a one-armed hug. Peste talaga yang nakakalokong ngiti na yan. Bwisit, sarap mong ilaglag sa kumukulong asupre.

I looked at what Jem is wearing – pure white, skintight leather clothes and a pink scarf around her neck, white Oakley jawbone shades at full make-up.

Okay, bigti na Trixie.      

Nagmukha akong PA with my black T-shirt and blue, cut-off skinny jeans and low boots.

Hindi makatarungan ang mundo.

"You're driving Overlord for me," he handed her the keys to the Camaro, "Win today's game, okay?" Nakita kong nagbeso sila and Jem smiled meaningfully at me as she slid into the driver's seat.

"Trixie?" Lumingon ako at nakita kong naghihintay si Alfredo na hawak ang pinto ng passenger side ni Lady. Naku, kung hindi ka lang... okay, Trix hindi niya kasalanan. Wag ka kasing assumera na ikaw ang date niya today.

Peste ka, paasa!

I slid into my seat glumly. He went to the driver's side and I was pleasantly surprised when he buckled the seatbelt for me. Nakakainis ka, ang gentleman mo. Ang lapit mo pero di naman kita mahawakan. Hanggang tingin na lang ba ako talaga?

"Trix, may problema ba?" He narrowed his eyes at me. 

"W-wala," I shook my head. "Nakakita lang ako ng malaking peste." I murmured to myself.

"Ha?"

"Bilisan na natin kasi baka ma-late tayo." He nodded and started the car 

"Lady luck is on our side today, love." He winked at me before he stepped on the gas and my breath caught in my throat as the car surged forward.

He looked so excited that I can't help but get carried away by his enthusiasm.

You just wait Alfredo Zabala. I'll make sure you win this event.

-------------------

"Okay lang baby, kailangan eh." Prince squeezed my hand habang binabagtas namin yung SCTEX. "Basta celebrate na lang tayo kapag dumating ka na. I'll prepare dinner sa apartment." He smiled at me. Hay, buti na lang napaka-understanding niya. Mas malala pa 'ata yung tantrums ko kaysa sa kanya dahil dun sa immersion namin. Honestly, favourite subject ko ang Anthro pero mas feel ko talaga ang mag-celebrate with Prince. Kahit nga hindi kami lumabas basta kasama ko lang siya.  

"Ma-mi-miss kita. Sabi nila wala daw signal dun," I pouted and he laughed.

"Gusto mo hiram ako helicopter sa HQ? I'll ask Kuya Ali."

"Talaga?"

"Oo naman, anything for my Goddess," sobrang seryoso niya at natawa ako.

"Baliw!"

"O kaya sasama na lang ako para di mo ko ma-miss. Mag-co-commute ako papunta dun."

I shook my head, "Hindi na. Okay lang, may klase ka." I stepped on the gas dahil naiiwan na kami ni Kuya Alfred.   

"Baby may sasabihin ako," I glanced at him. "Pinuntahan ako ng mama ni Mel kahapon." I tensed.

"Nakiusap siyang puntahan ko si Mel. I declined." Hindi ko mapigil na mapabuntong-hininga. Hay, Prince ikaw na talaga. Bilib na talaga ako sa loyalty niya kasi hindi siya nagtatago sa akin.

"Thank you," I replied simply. "Bilisan na natin ha. 'Tong si kuya parang gusto na namang lumipad. Buti na nga lang maluwag yung traffic security dito di kagaya sa Skyway kung hindi huli tayo." My speedometer read 180kph. Mukhang nag-eenjoy si kuya at nakalimutan na naman na hindi ako race car driver kagaya niya. I spotted his white Skyline disappear on the next turn. Medyo umaambon kaya natatakot akong sumunod pero ayoko ding maiwan at aasarin na naman ako ni kuya. Sa likod namin ay nakasunod naman sila Kuya Alphonse and his family na sakay ng kanyang FJ Cruiser.

"Baby kahit di tayo masyadong magmadali. Hindi naman tayo yung kasali," Prince reached for his bag from the backseat. "Gusto mo breakfast? Subuan kita. I made kimbap." Pag naging hubby ko na talaga siya feeling ko tataba talaga ako kasi ang hilig niyang magluto at kumain.

"Baby malapit na birthday ni papa, sama ka sa akin ha?"

"Oo naman, kaya lang okay lang ba sa mama mo?" I'm still apprehensive sa nangyari sa ospital. Alam ko yung mama niya mabigat pa yung loob sa akin.

"Akong bahala kay mama," Sinubuan niya ako. "Water?" Pina-sip niya ako ng tubig.

"Mala—AHHHH!"

Pagliko namin ay biglang may nag-cut na pulang Mustang na humaharurot. Ang lakas ng tapak ko sa brakes at muntikan na kaming humampas sa barrier sa gilid ng kalsada. Mabuti at hindi nakatutok sila Kuya Alphonse kungdi ay pati sila madidisgrasya. Tumalon yung puso ko ng dumulas yung gulong sa basang kalsada.

"FUCK! Baby okay ka lang?" Galit na galit si Prince habang chine-check kung nasaktan ako, "tarantado yun ah." I nodded weakly. Parang nawalan ng lakas yung mga kamay ko. Nilabas niya yung phone niya.

"Hello Kuya Alfred, may nag-cut sa amin." Rinig ko ang malakas na mura ni Kuya Alfred sa kabilang linya, "Pulang Mustang. Yes. Okay na po kami pero... thanks kuya."

Bumaba si Kuya Alphonse sa kotse at kinatok ang salamin ng bintana ko,"Diosa okay ka lang?" He asked worriedly.

"Opo, kuya..."

"Wag na muna tayong masyadong mabilis. Sigurado kang okay ka lang?" I nodded at him.

"Prince anong sabi ni Kuya?" I asked after a while.

"Siya na daw bahala. Goddess ako na mag-drive, okay?" He opened the passenger side at nagpalit kami. He drove steadily kahit nakikita kong nag-cle-clench yung kamay niya sa steering wheel. Kilala ko siya at alam kong mainit ang ulo niya dun sa asshole na nag-cut sa amin.

"Prince, kalma," I touched his arm.

In a few minutes naabutan na namin ang pulang Mustang at ang Skyline ni Kuya Alfred. Hinazard ni Prince si Shiro sa likod ng Mustang. Nakita kong bumaba rin si Trixie kay Lady. Jem got out from Overlord and leaned casually sa pinto.

The Mustang's door opened and kuya grabbed the front of the guy's shirt.

"Gago ka!" Galit na galit si Kuya Alfred at akmang susuntukin yung driver.

The guy raised his head and I took a step back.

"Ikaw?!" Anong ginagawa niya dito?

"Hi babe." Nathan Arroyo smiled up at me.

A/N:

Rurouni Kenshin copyright Nobuhiro Watsuki. 

Thank you to all my readers. The new arc is about to start. XD Hope everyone enjoys this ride.

Photo of Clark International Speedway on the mediabox. 3KM route for drag racing, karting, motorcycle racing and touring cars.