It's been exactly a month since I was humiliated at the cheer tryouts. Ever since then, I literally withdrew into my shell.

I went to school but in a large hoodie, a black nose mask (thankfully that wasn't weird because of COVID) and black sweats or cargo pants. I also wore shades when I could without drawing a teacher's attention.

I went to dance classes 4 times a week and the gym every day, around 5 am.  These were my therapy and happiness. The only stressful part about the gym was meeting my daily protein requirements but apart from that, it was all great.

I definitely hadn't seen a massive change, it was just a month of course but my body was now toned and  I was stronger now. I felt healthier mentally and emotionally. I had also left social media and started reading a lot of books. My favourite books were those by Robert Greene.

I also learned how to apply makeup better to give a natural yet alluring look.  I felt so much more better as a person. I had invested in clothes that made me feel and look good, completely changing my closet. And to top it off, I had also used the time to focus more on my studies so I was still doing great academically.

I also went into skincare, learning how to use the right ingredients to achieve healthy skin so that I can look good without makeup and even when I have makeup on, my makeup would sit pretty on my face.

After literally wishing myself out of everyone's minds and vanishing from people's view for 30 days, I was finally ready to show up at school as the put-together Lauretta that I was now.

.

I turned on NF as I dressed up and put "Clouds" on repeat. I needed intense motivation for today.

I wore parachute pants with a black crop top and black boots. I did a quick makeup routine mainly consisting of eyebrow gel, lipstick and eyeliner. I did a fit check in my mirror and loved what I saw. Then, I made my way to school.

I had begged my dad almost every day for the 30 days, using my grades as a bribe for a power bike. I knew it was pricey but I knew it was something my parents could afford.

Thankfully, he accepted and got me the bike. Bikes were something mostly driven by men (fewer in high school) and so I knew arriving at school with one would cause a buzz; which was what I wanted.

.

I had cleaned and taken care of my bike every single day before this in preparation for this day. So she was shining and glistening under the hot sun as I rode into the school grounds.

As expected, the roar of my bike was enough to attract the attention of the students. Everyone turned their eyes to see who the person under the helmet was. I took my time unbuckling myself from the bike, enough time to intensify people's curiosity.

When I took off my helmet, the looks on people's faces told me that they would be talking about this for this week and the next and if I'm lucky, an extra week. Everything was going as I planned.

I walked into class and found a seat at the back, not because of anything but just because I loved staying at the back now. I had to stay at the back when I was trying to stay lowkey during the 30 days.

As people walked into class, I felt their stares. The girls, gossiping. The guys, blatantly staring. I had my headphones on, still listening to "Clouds".

When the teacher walked into the class, I looked up only to meet Tyler's eyes. He was staring at me before I looked up. I didn't know how I felt for a few seconds so I stared back.

Then reality hit and I looked away. He was only staring at me because my physical appearance had changed. That was the harsh reality of life, no matter how much we try to start movements and go all body positivity or whatever positivity, the world was still primarily and primitively superficial and looks always matter.

Classes went by fast. Down the halls, in the toilet, no matter where I went, people were staring at me. If I had appeared at school with only my appearance different,  people might not have noticed, actually,  most people wouldn't notice. That was why I needed something big to draw attention to me, my bike, and now that caused people to pay attention to me whether they wanted to or not. This caused them to notice my different appearance and style.

.

It was lunchtime and I was at my normal table, except this time, I wasn't invisible. I almost felt uncomfortable from the extra attention but I had prepared for this. Music, good music which was NF for me. A great posture and a blank face.

I brought my own food because I needed to eat healthy and of course, a lot of protein which I knew I would never get in the cafeteria of a high school. However,  I got a smoothie from the cafeteria and added in protein powder.

From the corner of my eye, I saw Tyler's table, they were my real targets so everything they did mattered more to me than any other person's. I noticed Tyler taking glances at me, great.

Halfway through my lunch, I saw Sofia and Linda get up and make their way to my table. I almost smirked, but not yet. When they got to my table, I pretended like I didn't notice them.

Took them a few seconds to realise I would never acknowledge them and of course that had the mental effect I expected it to have on them, their bossy demeanour shifted a little.  Linda finally tapped me and motioned for me to lift my headphones.

"Hey Lauretta.", she said smiling.

She was going to pretend like nothing ever happened between us and that was absolutely fine, I wanted it that way.

"Hey", I replied.

"I like your fit", she said.

"Thanks.", I replied.

"Do you want to come to our table so we can introduce you to the rest of our friends?", she asked.

"Oh.", I said and added nothing, looking them straight in the eyes.

They felt uncomfortable.

"But if you feel you don't want to, it's okay.", Sofia said.

"No, it's just, I'd feel uncomfortable around the rest. I'd prefer if it was just you guys.", I said, putting on my best act of vulnerability.

"Oh, it's alright, we could join you. The guys could have fun on that table. It'll be just us at this table.", Linda said smiling as she and Sofia sat.

I smiled. This was too easy. And as predicted,  about 10 minutes later, the guys came over to my table.

Without trying, all the popular guys were at my table.

This was going to be fun.

Thank you all for sticking with me.

Tag for the chapter:  HighKingAzanar