I know what you’re thinking.

I was stupid and I was acting like an idiot. I was pretty much every name in the book, I know, but that still didn’t make me change my mind about anything.

I know it was stupid not to tell River, but how could I? The whole thing probably didn’t even matter; it was probably just a prank. Why have him worry about something when he didn’t have to? I was already used to River worrying about me, and I didn’t want to have him worry anymore.

Call me an idiot; call me whatever you want, but I was sure that this was the best thing to do. Ever since after what had happened with Mr. Higginson, River had always worried about me so much more than he had to. I didn’t blame him, but still… This was just something else that he didn’t have to worry about.

And it was the same with the Jay thing, too. River didn’t have to know about that, because I wasn’t interested in Jay in the slightest. I didn’t want River to go kick his ass or something when there was absolutely no chance that I’d leave him for Jay. Because I was sure that if River, Rex, and Seth all ganged up on someone, the person would definitely die. Especially since Seth’s killed three guys by himself before…

I wasn’t going to tell him unless I absolutely had to. You might think it’s dumb, but I don’t. I don’t want him worrying when he didn’t have to.

It had been two weeks, and I hadn’t gotten another note. It was probably just a one-time thing. I used to get notes every few days, but now it had been weeks.

I picked up my phone as I continued to sit on my bed. Alice would be gone with Rex for a while, and I was sure that Seth was with Marnie and River was in his dorm. I let out a breath of air as I dialed the number into my phone and pressed it to my ear.

“Delilah, it’s been so long!”

“You always say that.”

“Because it’s true!”

I let out a small chuckle as I listened to my best friend’s banter. It was true that I hadn’t talked to her in weeks, but I didn’t have any time to. After what had happened with Jay and the new note, not to mention all the school work I had to do, I just didn’t have enough time to call.

“How are things with you?” I asked, resting my chin on my knee. “Is Arianna still evil?”

“You bet,” Julie sighed, and I could just tell that she was shaking her head. “You know you’re the only person that has ever stuck up to her, right? It’s almost scary! It’s like she rules the school! If you were here, Delilah, you’d stick up to her again! And she’s always talking about how much of a loser you are and how you’re probably all alone at your new school because all your friends and your ‘emo lover’ left you.”

“That’s not true!” I shouted, louder than I had meant to. I bit the inside of my cheek as I continued, “You can let her know that I’m actually very popular here at Arkwright. I’m probably the most popular person here! Other than Jay Harris, maybe.”

“Jay Harris?” Julie asked excitedly. “You never told me that you go to school with Jay Harris!”

“I didn’t?”

“No! Are you friends with him?”

I sent a flat look at the floor. “You could say that, I guess.”

“That’s so cool! Arianna’s going to be so jealous! You know how much she loves Jay Harris! Jay Harris and Ben are the only two people on this planet that can make Arianna act like a complete and total idiot! Wow, she’s going to hate you even more!”

Another flat look at the floor. “Thanks, Julie.”

“Sorry!” she apologized with a giggle.

“Yeah, so I’m definitely not alone,” I confirmed with a nod, even though she couldn’t see me. “I’m the opposite of that, definitely. Almost everyone loves me here.”

“Almost everyone?”

Though it seemed like she did, I always had the feeling that Kendra really did hate me. Even though she continued to say that she was over River, I’d always think that that wasn’t true. And even though she seemed interested in Gabe, I’d always think that she still liked River.

I wasn’t about to tell her that Jay had confessed his feelings for me, or about Kendra and River, and definitely not about the note. I wasn’t going to tell anyone about that note, since it was probably just a stupid joke from some sick minded person who got fun out of tormenting people.

“I’m sure there’re people here that don’t like me,” I excused quickly, trying to sound believable. I was sure that there were people at this school that didn’t like me because they were jealous or something, but I wasn’t about to think of that right then.

When there was a knock on my door, I jumped and almost dropped the phone. “I have to go, Julie,” I told her, my heartbeat still beating quickly. “I’ll talk to you later. Bye.”

“Bye!”

I placed my phone on the bed and stood up, walking toward the door. I was sure it was just Alice, who always forgot her key, so I’d just open the door for her for the thousandth time.

But when I opened the door, it wasn’t Alice. It was Kendra.

Obviously not noticing my eye roll, Kendra invited herself in as she smiled brightly at me. “Hi, Delilah!”

“Hi, Kendra.”

“Where’s Alice?”

“With her boyfriend.”

“Oh, that’s cool,” she giggled, nodding as I closed the door. “I was just wondering if you knew when the next time Gabe was coming to visit. I really can’t wait to see him again! He’s so hot!”

I blinked, actually expecting this from Kendra. She sure liked to speak her mind. I’d never been able to do that, and I was sure that I wouldn’t ever be able to. I cared about what people cared about me way too much for me to speak my mind.

“Um, I’m not sure,” I lied with a shrug, trying to give her a smile. “He kind of just pops up, you know?”

I did know when Gabe was going to visit, but that didn’t mean I was about to tell Kendra. She seemed more obsessed with him than she did with River, and I could tell that Gabe wanted absolutely nothing to do with her whatsoever. And I didn’t blame him, since none of us wanted anything to do with her either. She was too annoying for her own good, and she didn’t even seem to notice.

“Oh, okay!” she giggled, smiling brightly. “I guess I’ll talk to you later, then!”

She skipped to the door, opened it, and then skipped out of my room, and I only blinked. She left the door open, causing me to cuss loudly in my head, and I made my way to go shut it.

“Hi, River!” I heard Kendra greet in the same annoying way she had greeted me.

When my fiancé stepped into my room a few seconds later, he rolled his eyes after he shut the door. “I don’t remember her being this annoying when we were kid.”

I shrugged. “People change, I guess.”

River smirked as he inched closer to me, causing me to smile as well.   

“What time’s Alice getting back?” River whispered in my ear as he wrapped his arms around my waist from behind, burying his face into my shoulder. His breath gave me tingles, and it managed to calm me down a lot more. I was with River, the person that loved me more than anything. I was safe.

“I--I’m not sure,” I answered, a little flustered. Alice was going to go hang out with Rex for a while with Seth and Marnie, and I didn’t know how long she was going to be gone for. Knowing her and Rex, it could be for a long time, but I couldn’t have been sure.

“Then why don’t we have some fun until they get back?”

Normally, I would love that idea. Truthfully, I still loved it and I really wanted to do whatever he had in mind. But right then I got more butterflies in my stomach, and they weren’t just because of what River was implying.

“And that kind of fun would be?” I asked, trying to stick to my normal, playful self whenever River and I did something like this. I could tell that my voice was kind of shaky, but I did my best to keep it under control. He was going to know something was wrong if I kept acting this way.

River trailed kissing up from my shoulder to my jaw. “Something like this, maybe…? Or maybe we could go farther…”

He turned me around, pressing his lips to mine. Though at first it was a soft and respectable kiss, it quickly escalated into a total make out session on the bed. This was totally normal for us, and I was actually expecting it, but I definitely wasn’t expecting for the door to burst open right when we were starting to get somewhere.

“My eyes!” both Rex and Alice shouted in unison, causing me to roll my eyes.

They really were a perfect match.

River just didn’t have his shirt on; was it that grotesque to them? Sure, he had a scar going down his chest, but it wasn’t anything bad. I didn’t even notice that it was there most of the time.

“What’s all the screaming about?” Marnie asked, bounding through the door next. Seth was right behind her, not to my surprise, and when he saw that both River and I were on my bed, he smirked like the idiot he was. It seemed like all he could do was smirk.

“Someone’s having a little too much fun in my room,” Alice informed her, her hands clasped over her eyes.

River shrugged his shirt on, grumbling something that I didn’t catch. I blew it off, laying back onto my bed with an impatient sigh.

“Our room, Alice,” I corrected her. “And you weren’t supposed to be back for a while.”

“Actually,” Marnie started, coming up beside Alice and prying her hands away, “we never said when we were going to be back. I’m sure you just assumed it was going to be a while. Sorry that we interrupted you before you got some action.”

“Oh, God,” I groaned, covering my eyes now. Could this be any more embarrassing?

“You sound like Rex,” River informed her, leaning back next to me as well. I had to agree with him, since that I was such a Rex-ish thing to say.

Looking over at my blonde best friend now, I rolled my eyes once again when I saw that his hands were still clasped over his eyes. I just didn’t understand him sometimes, and I didn’t think that I ever would. I didn’t get how I could be such best friends with someone so strange, but I loved him anyway.

“Okay, Rex, we’re fully dressed now,” I informed him flatly, crossing my arms over my chest as he peeked from behind his hands. Seeing that it was safe, he dropped his hands to the side and continued to grin like an idiot at me, as usual.

“I don’t get how you’re always the one to walk in on us,” River told him, a flat look on his face. “It’s always you.”

“It’s because he bursts in without knocking,” I informed him, and then cut a glare at Alice. “Like someone else I know.”

“Hey, it’s my room, too! You shouldn’t be doing anything nasty in here without knowing that you have the possibility of getting caught!” Alice defending, crossing her arms over her chest and sticking her nose into the air. “And maybe if you locked the door, it’d be a little harder to get inside.”

“Because you always forget your key,” I added, causing her to glare at me.

“Shut up.”

Hah, I caught her.

“You have an apartment blocks away,” Seth told us, as if we didn’t know. “If you want to go sleep together or something, go walk a mile back to your apartment and go do it there.”

I covered my face with my hands, letting out a groan. I’d never understand how they could all talk about sex so openly and easily. I didn’t get how it seemed that they loved to tease me about this sort of thing, and I hated it. It’s supposed to be private, isn’t it? It sure didn’t seem like it.

“Come on, we’re leaving,” Alice demanded, grabbing Rex by his collar and pulling him to the door. Marnie followed after them, but Seth stood there and just stared at me for a moment. It seemed like he wanted to say something else, but he caught it off and instead said, “Use protection.”

I glared at him, and he gave a little wave over his shoulder before shutting the door behind him. River and I only continued to lay there for who knows how long before I said, “Well, that killed the mood.”

“You got that right.”

I let out a sigh as I sat up, River doing the same. “You want to watch a movie?” I asked, scratching the back of my head as I looked around to see if we did have a movie. I was sure Alice had a few, since she always seemed to have everything, so I continued to look around for one.

“Sure,” River shrugged, looking for one as well.

 I went through her drawers and made a face when I saw the movie I pulled out. I knew Alice like horror movies, but I didn’t think that she’d like something like this…

“Black Swan?” River asked from behind me as he looked over my shoulder, an eyebrow raised. “You want to watch that?”

“No!” I cried, shoving the movie back into her drawer. I definitely did not want to watch a movie like that. I hadn’t seen it, but I had heard about how disgusting it was. So I definitely wasn’t going to watch it anytime soon. Or ever, for that matter.

River rolled his eyes and chuckled, and we continued to search for a movie to watch. After turning out unsuccessful, we gave up and made our way to Seth and Rex’s dorm, where we were sure that everyone would be.

“So what was Kendra in your room for?” River asked, stuffing his hands into his pockets as we continued to walk.

I rolled my eyes, crossing my arms over my chest. “She wanted to know when the next time Gabe was visiting was,” I huffed, shaking my head. “I told her I didn’t know, even though I did. I really think that girl is more obsessed with him than she was with you! It’s scary!”

River chuckled, removing one of his hands from his pockets and wrapping his arm around my waist. We walked in silence for a few seconds before he said, “Yeah, it kind of is.”

We continued our way to Seth and Rex’s dorm until we were stopped by someone stepping in front of us. At first I thought it was by accident, but when I looked up at the person who had blocked our path, I was sure that it had been no accident.

“River, Delilah,” Jay smiled, nodding curtly. I wanted nothing more than to rip his throat out, but I had to act calm and normal in front of River. He didn’t have any idea about what Jay had said to me weeks before… And it was going to stay that way.

“Hey,” River replied, blinking. I didn’t think that Jay had spoken to him before, so I was sure that he was surprised. If he was just some guy form school, it wouldn’t have really mattered, but he was the Jay Harris, the most popular and most handsome guy on the face of the earth. At least, according to the tabloids.

“Can I talk to you for a sec, Delilah?” he now asked, jabbing a thumb over his shoulder.

My eyes widened, and I quickly wrapped my arm around River’s. “Sorry,” I said, speaking a mile a minute. “But River and I have something really important that we need to attend to, so I guess I’m going to have to talk to you sometime later. Sorry!”

I plowed past him then, dragging a confused River with me. Jay didn’t call me back or follow us, so I let out a breath after I started walking again.

“Want to explain what that was about?” River asked, an eyebrow raised.

“He’s, uh, as annoying as his sister,” I informed him with a nervous chuckle. “I should have expected it, you know? I mean, they are siblings. It’s not a surprise that they’re so much alike…”

I was breathing heavily, and I felt like I was shaking, even though I knew that I wasn’t. I hated lying to River, and I wished that I didn’t have to do it. But I just couldn’t worry him with something useless. He always got so worried, and I felt so guilty.

He got shot for me. I was always going to remember that, no matter what. River was shot in the chest, and it was all my fault. He had told me that he loved me out in the open, and Mr. Higginson didn’t like that. He tried to get rid of him, but River lived. I was so thankful that he lived.

“I’m not surprised,” River shrugged, slipping his arm from my grasp and entwining our fingers. “Like brother like sister, huh?”

I chuckled again. “Uh-huh…”

“Are you sure you’re okay, Delilah?” River asked again, stopping and staring at me strangely now. “You seem like you’ve seen a ghost.”

“I--I saw Mr. Higginson,” I blurted, not even meaning to. Why did I just do that? That was going to worry him, too… But not as much as knowing about Jay would have, and especially about knowing about the note.

“Where?” he asked, leaning forward and rubbing his hand up and down my arm. I hated lying to him; I couldn’t stand it. He was so honest with me, and I was so… dishonest with him. Would he want to marry some liar?

“When we were with Jay just now,” I lied, sniffling slightly as tears came to my eyes. I knew that this would prove that I had seen Mr. Higginson even though I didn’t, but I wasn’t crying because of that. I was crying because I was lying to my fiancé, the person I was going to spend the rest of my life with. Why did I have to be so dishonest? “That’s why I wanted to get away from him so quickly… and because he’s annoying.”

“Hey, it’s okay,” River smiled, wrapping his arms around my shoulders and hugging me tightly. “I’ll always protect you, from anything at all. I love you with all my heart and I won’t let anyone or anything hurt you ever again. I give you my word.”

This only caused me to cry even more. Though I was willing to do anything for him as well, I was still lying. He never lied to me.

I nodded when I pulled away from him, wiping at my eyes. He smiled, leaning over and planting a light kiss against my lips. He then took my hand once again and we made our way to Seth and Rex’s dorm, where our friends were, where I knew that I’d be safe.

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