“I want your love and I want your revenge, you and me could write a bad romance,” I sang along with the radio, looking out the window at all the lights that passed. “Oh-oh-oh-oh-ooh!”

“Your voice is beautiful, but shut up,” Seth snapped at me, reaching over to the radio and shutting it off. “I hate Lady Gaga.”

“You hate Lady Gaga?” I screeched, not even able to fathom the thought of it. “How is that even possible? Are you insane or something? She’s amazing!”

“She’s a freak.”

“She’s so talented!”

“She’s a dude.”

I crossed my arms over my chest and pouted as I stared back out the window, any retort dying in my throat. Lady Gaga wasn’t a man, but how was I supposed to respond to that? How could he not like that song? He was insane.

When I reached for the radio again, Seth gave me a pointed look. I rolled my eyes and stuck my tongue out at him, getting the urge to flip him off but deciding against it. I didn’t want to get him mad at me or anything. Right then he was just annoyed, not angry.

I reached for the switch on the radio again, and Seth snapped, “Don’t touch the radio. I don’t want to hear you singing when you’re drunk anymore. It sounds all weird.”

“You said my voice was beautiful,” I reminded him, smiling just a little bit. “You like my voice.”

“Usually,” he informed me, rolling his eyes as his grip on the steering wheel tightened just a little. “But when you’re drunk you sound all weird and just not good. You slur way too much.”

“Well, what do you expect?” I asked with a giggle. “Of course I’d slur. I’m drunk.”

“Obviously.”

I hit his shoulder playfully, giggling as I did so. Did all drunks do that? Did they all giggle? It sure seemed like they did, since that was exactly what I kept on doing. It was just so much fun.

Have you ever been drunk before? I hadn’t before that night. It felt really weird, like something I hadn’t ever experienced before in my life. It felt good, but then it felt bad as well. I just couldn’t explain it since it was just so weird.

I think I could have gotten used to this, but I knew that it wasn’t a good idea.

As we passed by streetlights, I giggled as they zoomed past. They were like shooting stars…

I wish that River would get his memory back soon, I wished in my mind, smiling to myself as I kept my eyes shut. I want River to hold me and tell me he loves me again, just like he used to.

But would that ever happened? It sure seemed like it wouldn’t. With the way he had been dancing with Kendra, he seemed like he liked her now. He never danced with me like that… It was always just slow dancing. I guessed that that was romantic, but still…

I was just glad that I was out of that club. There was no way I could have been able to watch Kendra and River dancing. They were the reason why I was drunk now, and they were the reason for all of my problems.

“What about Rex and Alice?” I couldn’t help but ask, my words slurring as I played with the handle of the door that Seth had luckily locked. If he hadn’t, I’d probably go flying out the door. Even though I did have my seatbelt on… But knowing me, I’d find a way to do it. “Are we just leaving them there at the club?”

“I’ll text Rex later and tell him that him and Alice are going to have to take a taxi home,” Seth shrugged, as if it was no big deal at all. I laughed a little, imagining a wandering Rex looking for Seth’s car in the dark parking lot after the party. But then I saw Alice wandering as well, and then it wasn’t very funny anymore.

When Seth helped me out of his car, I let out a giggle and clung onto him so I wouldn’t fall. Everything was just so funny to me right then. The crack I had almost tripped over, how big the school was, and the color of all the cars in the parking lot made me just want to burst out laughing.

“Don’t make me have to carry you, Delilah,” Seth sighed, trying his best to get me to stand up correctly, but all I would do was fall right back into his chest, which was now covered by his shirt. I was in my dress as well, because I couldn’t just walk across the parking lot and through the school’s campus in my bra and underwear. Seth had to put it on me, but I still knew that I couldn’t walk through school like that.

“Carry me,” I whined, draping myself over him so I didn’t have to stand up on my own. “I want you to carry me.”

“Delilah.”

The way he said my name was so hot. Had I never noticed that before? He just said it so low and it sounded so seductive and I could have listened to it all day. He was just so hot that it was almost ridiculous.

“I love the way you say my name,” I smiled, wrapping my arms around his neck. “Say it again.”

“No, Delilah.”

He rolled his eyes when he realized that he had said my name once again. I knew he was internally slapping himself in the forehead, and I couldn’t help giggling at the image. How cute was he? “You said my name! Your voice is so hot. Your face is hot. Everything about you is just so hot!”

Seth rolled his eyes at me, but I swear that his cheeks were pink. “We need to get you to your room before you start spewing out everything, counting your guts.”

“I’m not scared to tell you all my secrets,” I informed him, still draping myself over his shoulders. “And I don’t feel like I’m going to throw up.”

“You will.”

“I liked kissing you back when we were at Bentwood,” I admitted, smiling like a complete idiot as I still stayed attached to him. “I’ve always thought you were hot.”

“We have to get you back up to your dorm before you do something dumb,” Seth sighed, ignoring what I had been saying as he ran a hand through his brown hair. But I saw that his cheeks were no longer pink, they were red. “Now just walk up the stairs and I’ll be right behind you.”

“Carry me…” I looked up at him, my arms still wrapped around his neck, and I bit my lip. I made my eyes big as I batted my eyelashes. “Please, Seth? Will you please carry  me up to my room?”

Seth narrowed his eyes at me for a moment before I finally felt myself being picked up off the ground, and I let out a squeal because it was so much fun, like I was on a ride at an amusement park. Seth had no trouble walking through the parking lot and onto the school’s campus. He was strong, so I knew that I was in good hands with him.

“You’re so cute,” I giggled into his neck as he walked me through the campus. “You’re like my prince charming or something.”

I could tell Seth rolled his eyes. “You should go to bed, Delilah.”

“Say my name again,” I requested, smiling into his neck now. “The way you say it is just so cute.”

I used to call River cute. I’d used to call him cute all the time, because I knew that it annoyed him. His reactions were adorable, so that was why I would tease him. But here I was, in the arms of another guy and I was calling him cute. Even though I didn’t even know what was going on…

When we finally got to my dorm, he set me down but let me lean onto him as he reached into the pocket under my dress for my keys.

“Hmm,” I moaned, smiling over his shoulder. “That feels good.”

This immediately caused him to retract his hand from my dress as quickly as he possibly could, and I could tell that he was either uncomfortable, turned on, or both.

“Can you get your keys out yourself?” he asked in my ear, his voice husky.

He was so turned on.

“Sure,” I giggled, reaching into my pocket and swiftly pulling them out. Before I could stab them into the keyhole, Seth snatched the keys from my grasp.

“You were going to stab the wall,” he informed me with a roll of his eyes, sticking them in himself.

Oops.

When the door opened, he gently pushed me inside. I continued to stumble, but he held onto me so I wouldn’t fall. After closing and locking the door behind us, he led me over to my bed and carefully sat me down on it.

“Are you okay?” he asked, his hands on either side of my face.

“I’ve never been better,” I grinned, grabbing his face as well and forcing him to come closer. Our lips crashed together forcefully, but Seth wasn’t kissing me back. He was trying to push me away, but I wasn’t listening. I just wanted to kiss him.

When he finally got me away from him, we were both breathing heavily. “Delilah, we can’t do anything. You’re drunk. I’d be taking advantage of you if we did anything.”

“So?” I questioned, cocking my head to the side as I smiled goofily. “Maybe I want you to take advantage of me, Seth. Maybe I want you.”

Seth breathed in sharply but turned his head away from me. “You love River. You’re drunk. You love River. You’re drunk.”

He seemed to be chanting this inside of his head as I leaned forward and planted kisses up and down his neck and jawbone. I felt his muscles tense but I didn’t stop myself from kissing him even more and pulling him on top of me onto the bed.

“I want you,” I whispered in his ear, tugging his shirt over his head. “I don’t want any river. The Nile’s way too long for me.”

Seth rolled his eyes, pushing himself away from me and reaching for his shirt. “You’re too drunk to even understand what’s going on. I don’t want you waking up tomorrow morning regretting anything we did together.”

“We already made out,” I smiled, sitting up more and wrapping my arms around his shoulders. “And I don’t regret that.”

“Well, making out is a lot different than sex. And anyway, you’re still drunk, so of course you won’t regret it,” Seth sighed, removing my hands from around his neck. “I’ll regret it, Delilah. River’s my best friend and even though he can’t remember anything right now, he will one day. And he’ll love you more than I ever could.”

“River’s mean,” I complained, wrapping my arms around his waist now so tight that he wouldn’t be able to pry me off, even if he really wanted to. “You’re not mean. You were, but you’re not now. You’re nice to me. You’re nice to me when River isn’t. And you really do like me, don’t you?”

Seth looked away from me. “Delilah, let go.”

“I don’t want to,” I pouted, sticking my tongue out at him. “I want you to kiss me. I want you to make me really forget about River and Kendra and everything horrible that’s been happening to me. I want you to make me forget about Jay and the new notes. Just make me forget.”

“Delilah,” Seth groaned when I started to run my hands through his hair.

“Don’t you love me?” I asked innocently, batting my eyelashes once again.

Seth looked away from me, his jaw tensing. “Of course I love you.”

I smiled, kissing him once again and running my hands through his hair once again.

“Delilah, stop it.”

But I didn’t stop, and now Seth wasn’t stopping me either. Neither of us were stopping now, and then I didn’t think I would regret everything, but I knew when I woke up in the morning everything would be different.

 *~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~*

“You just made the biggest mistake of your life.”

I opened my eyes, looking around the white room I was laying in. Where was I?

I sat up, looking around to see who had just spoken to me. The voice was familiar and aggravating, so I knew that it couldn’t have been any of my friends. It was also female, so I narrowed it down to either Kendra or Arianna.

I looked over to see Kendra smirking at me, her arms crossed over her chest as she gave me a look that made me want to smack her. “You made such a horrible mistake, you slut.”

“What are you talking about?” I demanded, trying to stand up from whatever I was sitting on, but I found that it was no use. It was like I was glued to the ground or something. “I didn’t make any mistake.”

Kendra grinned at me evilly. “Just shut up and wake up.”

As I opened my eyes, I found myself wanting to shut them once again. Why did my head hurt so much? I couldn’t remember a time when my head hurt as much as it did then. Was this even humanly possible? It sure didn’t seem like it. Was I dead or something? I looked over at my clock to see that it was seven in the morning. What day was it? Saturday?

When I tried to sit up, I come to realize that my pounding head wasn’t the only thing that was stopping me. I rubbed my eyes and looked down to see a muscular arm wrapped around my waist. What? Why couldn’t I remember anything?

When I looked over at who the arm belonged to, my eyes widened. I expected to see River, but that definitely wasn’t who I saw. Who I saw was Seth, who wasn’t wearing his shirt.

Because I was.

What had happened the night before? Why couldn’t I remember anything? Did I have some type of amnesia like River did? No, I couldn’t have, because I could remember pretty much everything but the night before. What the hell happened?

I looked around the room to see my dress on the floor, along with Seth’s pants and my bra. This was looking even more worse by the second and I had no idea what had happened…

Did we do what I thought we did? We had to, right? I couldn’t think of any other scenario with events like this… If only I could remember what happened the night before! Was this how River felt, since he couldn’t remember anything at all passed nine-years-old?

I continued to lay on my side as I looked around the room, Seth’s arm still wrapped around my waist. Alice’s bed was untouched, so I knew she hadn’t been there all night. So where was she? Did she spend the night with Rex in his dorm? Was that why Seth was here?

Maybe Seth and I hadn’t slept together. Maybe Alice wanted to spend the night with Rex, so they kicked Seth out and they came here? That still didn’t explain why Seth and I were in the same bed, and the fact that I was wearing his shirt. And unless Seth always slept in his boxers, it didn’t explain that either.

The first thing I felt was guilt. I mean, I hadn’t slept with anyone ever, besides River. And even though we were technically broken up, the real River didn’t know this. I still loved River, of course I did, but had something happened the night before to say something differently? I didn’t want to give Seth the wrong idea or anything…

But did I really give him the wrong idea? The feelings I was feeling right then was different than before. What had happened the night before that would get me to feel so differently?

But now I couldn’t stop thinking about that dream that I had had. Why was it Kendra that had said that I had made the biggest mistake of my life? It wasn’t like she knew if Seth and I had had sex or anything. It must have just been my imagination messing with me…

If Seth and I had slept together I would have remembered, right? Why would I forget? Unless I hit my head or something like River had…

Did I hit my head? I began feeling around my scalp to see if I had any bumps or bruises, but it felt perfectly fine and unharmed. If I didn’t hit my head, why couldn’t I remember anything that had happened the night before? River must have felt horrible, because he couldn’t remember nine years of his life.

So if I didn’t hit my head, it had to be something else. I quickly went through different things that would cause me so easily to forget. Only one thing came to mind, but I couldn’t believe that I had done it.

I got drunk.

I couldn’t remember, but I was sure that I gotten drunk at Jay’s party, and it resulted in me sleeping with Seth. Unless he was drunk himself, why didn’t he stop me? Seth wasn’t the type of guy that would take advantage of a girl… Right? The only girl that he had ever been with that I knew of was Marnie, but she never said anything about Seth forcing himself on her. It just wasn’t like him.

Though he was big and intimidating, especially with his background and everything, Seth really was a sweet guy when you got to know him. Sure, he was a complete asshole to me when we first met, but that was before we got close. After he told me everything about Avery and how he had a crush on me, and especially after I told him about the notes I was getting, we got a lot closer to each other.

So was this really a mistake? I couldn’t help but ask myself this question. Seth was really such a sweetheart and River was acting like the asshole now. Even though it kind of wasn’t really him… But still. Everything was just so messed up right now and I just didn’t get it.

“Morning,” Seth suddenly greeted, and I bit my lip to stop myself from jumping in surprise. His grip around my waist tightened just a little as he leaned forward and began planting kisses up and down my neck.

I made a small noise, arching my neck for him to get better access. He continued kissing, and I didn’t want him to stop. Whatever I couldn’t remember that happened the night before didn’t matter as Seth’s hands roamed up and down my body.

“What happened last night?” I couldn’t help but ask, not stopping Seth from doing what he was doing. “I can’t remember anything.”

“You don’t remember?” he smirked against my skin, causing chills to travel down my spine. “Do I have to remind you?”

His warm breath tickled the skin on my neck, and I couldn’t help but breathe in sharply. He was going to remind me? What was he going to do? If we slept together, does that mean that he was going to do something like that?

When he got on top of me, I sucked in another breath. We really did sleep together! But the strange part was, I didn’t feel guilty. Even when I thought of River, I didn’t feel guilty in the slightest. We weren’t going out, and he was supposedly sleeping with Kendra, so why couldn’t I sleep with someone else?

He raised his shirt that I was wearing so it pooled around my stomach, and he was about to remove my underwear as well until there were loud knocks on the door that immediately stopped us. He let out a sigh of impatience, pulling his shirt down so it covered me once again.

“I—I’ll get it,” I whispered, wiggling from under him and making my way over to the door. Who would be coming over this early in the morning? Was it Alice? She was the only person I could think of…

When I opened the door, I saw that my suspicion had been right. Alice stood in the hallway, grinning at me. Her hair was messy and her clothes were wrinkled, and I could only assume what she had been doing with Rex in his room. I really didn’t want to think about it, because it I was sure that it was the same thing Seth and I had done.

“Have you seen Seth?” was the first thing she asked me, catching me off guard and causing my eyes to go wide in the sockets. “Rex and I went back to their dorm after we caught a taxi and he wasn’t there. So we thought he was with you and I spent the night.”

“Um, I don’t know where he is,” I lied, biting the inside of my cheek as I tried to hide behind the door. “I haven’t seen him since we got back from the party last night.”

Alice grinned at me, noticing and looking down at the shirt that went all the way down to my knees. “Who’s shirt is that?”

I blinked. What was I supposed to say? She had a suspicion that Seth and I liked each other, but could I let her know about what we had done? She was one of my best friends, but what if River got his memory back or something? This wasn’t going to be good.

“Mine,” I excused, stepping into the hallway and shutting the door behind me so she couldn’t see inside. I leaned against it, just in case she decided that she wanted to get inside to see who else was in there. “It’s my pajamas. You’ve never seen it before?”

Alice was smirking now. “Oh, I’ve seen it,” she snickered, crossing her arms over her chest. “I saw it on Seth last night.”

Oh, crap!

“You’re crazy,” I waved away, crossing my arms as well after I had done so. I had to act as cool and as calm as possible so I didn’t look like a complete and total liar, but I didn’t really think it was of any use. She had already found out and we had been caught. There was no way I was getting out of this. “It really is my shirt, and I can’t believe you can’t remember it. You must be insane.”

“My name’s not Kendra,” Alice informed me with a roll of her eyes, as if I somehow didn’t know. “I’m not insane. We’re friends, Delilah. You don’t have to lie to me about what you and Seth did since you and River aren’t together anymore. You remember how I acted when I first met you two. He’s hot.”

Oh, I remembered what had happened when we had first met. She had hit on Seth and he had used me to get her to back off. When she spat in my coffee, I thought that I’d hate her forever. I guess that didn’t happen.

“Okay, we had sex,” I blurted, biting my lip after I had done so. I had said that a lot more willingly than I thought I would. But how was Alice going to react? I knew that she liked to joke about Seth and me, but what would she do when she actually got confirmation?

“Oh, my gosh!” she squealed, grabbing onto my shoulders and hopping up and down a few times. This action caused my head to spin, and I bit the inside of my lip to stop myself from groaning. “You two finally did it! I can’t believe it! Oh, my gosh! This is so unbelievable! This is awesome! Is he inside right now?”

I nodded, continuing to bite my lip until my head calmed down. When it never came, I fell against the door a little. I was starting to feel sick now.

“Delilah, are you okay?” Alice asked, placing a hand on my shoulder in concern. “You look like you’re going to be sick or something. Did you drink at all last night?”

“A little, and I think I might be sick,” I groaned, clutching onto my stomach with one hand while grabbing on the doorknob with the other. “Go back to Rex’s dorm. Seth’s in here, so I’ll be fine.”

Alice nodded. “Alright. Now get back inside before you puke all over me and the hallway. You know Headmistress Pease won’t be very happy if you do. And I’m sure Seth misses you.”

I glared at her for her last comment before nodding, quickly opening the door and running into the bathroom. I didn’t lock the door, so Seth came in right when I began puking into the toilet. I obviously wasn’t doing a very good job of keeping my hair up, because Seth was quickly at my side and holding it up for me.

“And this is what happens when you drink too much,” he sighed, and I could just tell that he was shaking his head at me. But I didn’t really blame him, because I knew I had made a huge mistake in drinking so much that I had gotten this drunk.

When I was finally done puking, I brushed my teeth and crawled back into bed. I had Seth put his shirt back on and I was now in my normal pajamas, and I felt like falling asleep all over again and not waking up until I had to go to class on Monday, but I knew there was one thing that I had to do.

“Hey, before you go… hand me my phone, will you?” I asked weakly, my eyes closed as I pointed around for the coffee table randomly. Where was it in the room again? I couldn’t really tell where it was. “I need to call my mom.”

It might not have been such a good idea to call my mom when I had a hangover, but I knew that I’d never call her if I didn’t do it right then. If I didn’t call her then, she’d never know that River and I weren’t together anymore.

“Sure,” Seth shrugged, walking over and picking it off the table before walking back over and handing it to me. “Here you go.”

“Thanks,” I breathed, still not opening my eyes.

He knelt down and kissed my forehead softly, and I smiled as my eyes still stayed closed.

“I love you,” he whispered, and I couldn’t help but smile. I cracked my eyes open, lifting my head up a little as I slowly brushed my lips against his. I didn’t say it back to him, but I didn’t have to. He knew how I felt.

When he finally left my room, I dialed my mother’s number and let out a sigh when I pressed it to my ear. I hadn’t talked to her since I had gotten in a fight with her about marrying River so early, and I wondered if she was still mad at me. It had been a few months, but that felt like years to me.

“Delilah?” I heard my mother ask from the other line, and I was so happy to hear her voice. “I’m surprised that you called. I thought that I might never speak to you again, even though you’re my daughter and everything.”

I couldn’t tell if she was angry or not, but I didn’t really care very much at that moment. I hadn’t spoken to her in months, and I wanted to tell her everything that had happened, but I didn’t want her telling me that she told me so when I was finished.

“Mom, I have to tell you something,” I started, biting my lip as I tried to think of a good way to tell her. “And it’s really important.”

“Oh, God,” she gasped, and I could hear her hand slap over her mouth. When she removed it, she continued. “You’re not pregnant, are you?”

“Of course not!” I cried out, a little too loud even though I was the only one in my room. “I’m not pregnant, Mom. Nowhere near it.”

Even though I just had sex with my best friend…

“Then what is it?” my mother pressed on. “Hurry up and tell me.”

“Well, River and I broke up,” I admitted, staring down at the ground, for some reason ashamed. “Actually, we broke up a few months ago, right after the car accident. I know that I should have told you sooner, but I was still trying to get over it and try to think of the right way to tell you.”

“I told you so, Delilah,” my mother scolded me, and I let out a groan. I knew she was going to say that! That was the main reason why I didn’t tell her about us breaking up from the start! “I knew that you weren’t going to spend the rest of your life with that boy! But did you listen to me? No, you didn’t. You fought with your brother and me about it, and you haven’t come into contact with any of us for months! And all because of that boy!”

“That boy is the love of my life,” I snapped, not even meaning to do so. What was I doing? I was trying to convince her that I was over River, but obviously I wasn’t. I didn’t think I ever would really be over River, even though I had just slept with Seth.

“And yet you’re not together anymore.”

“You know, this is why I didn’t call you sooner, Mom,” I snapped once again, my hand clenching into a fist. “Because I already knew exactly what you’d say. I knew that you didn’t like the fact that River and I were going to get married, but I honestly don’t care about your opinion.”

“Is there anything else you have to say?” my mother asked angrily, and I could tell she was tapping her foot against the floor. “Because I don’t really feel like being yelled at by my daughter over the phone. How about I just send you back home and away from Arkwright so we can talk about this properly?”

“I’m not yelling at you, Mother,” I told her slowly, as if she was so stupid that she wouldn’t be able to understand me if I spoke any faster. “And yes, I do have something else I’d like to say.”

“Well, say it then.”

“I’m going out with Seth now.”

Was I really going out with Seth? I didn’t even know myself. I guess we were, since we had just had sex and he told me he loved me and everything, but I wasn’t even a hundred percent sure about how I felt for Seth.

“You’re going out with your ex-boyfriend’s—” my mother began, but I quickly cut her off before she could say anymore.

“Fiancé,” I corrected, feeling my right eye twitch ever so slightly.

“—Fiancé’s best friend?” she finished with an exasperated sigh at the end. I was glad that I was making her frustrated, because I was way passed that. I was pretty much fuming by now.

“Yes,” I answered, not scared of what she had to say. I could have always just hung up on her if I wanted. “Yes, I am.”

“That’s a really slutty thing to do, Delilah.”

Any comeback I had died in my throat at that. Did my mother just call me a slut? The woman that was supposed to love and support me just called me a slut? She didn’t have any idea about anything that I had to go through with River and Kendra and these feelings I was having for Seth through it all. She had no idea what this was like.

“You have no idea what you’re talking about,” I spat, voicing my thoughts as my grip no my phone tightened even more. “You don’t know what I’ve had to go through over here. You don’t know what happened with River or what happened between Seth and me or anything! What gives you the right to call me a slut? You’re my mother!”

“I have the right because I was in the same situation you’re in right now!” my mother shouted abruptly, causing my whole body to freeze. She had been in the situation before? When? She would always tell me about her past boyfriends before my dad, but she never told me anything about having to choose between best friends or even anyone.

“What are you talking about?” I demanded, not knowing what else I was supposed to say.

“Your father and Nick were best friends in high school,” my mother explained, and I could tell she was trying to calm herself down so she wouldn’t yell at me. “And I was the object of both of their affections. And yes, I fell in love with your father, but who am I married to now?”

“Nick,” I answered, even though I knew that I didn’t have to.

“That’s right,” she sighed, and I could just tell that she was shaking her head. “I really loved your father, and I still do, but he was gone for ten years. There was absolutely nothing I could do to get him back. No matter how hard I tried, there was no way to find him or to prove that he was really dead. Nick and I grew closer while he was gone, and I saw what I was missing out on, and I fell in love with him.”

That really did sound exactly like what was happening with Seth, River, and me now. I just couldn’t get River back, and now I was growing closer with Seth. But my dad eventually did come back, so did that mean that River would, too? I mean, history is doomed to repeat itself, right?

“I felt like a complete slut,” my mother continued, and it felt weird for her to call herself that. “I mean, even though I thought your father was dead, I was still fooling around and falling in love with his best friend. I felt absolutely horrible.”

And so did I. Even though River was off with some other girl, I still felt guilty for being with another guy. Because River didn’t really know what was going on, but I did. Technically we weren’t really broken up, and technically I was cheating on him. And that made me feel absolutely horrible, just like my mother had when she was with Nick.

“I know the feeling,” I agreed with her, biting my tongue to stop myself from saying anything else.

“I think you should call your brother and tell him what’s going on,” my mother informed me, and I heard her sniffing. Did I make her cry? Did the story she was telling me make her cry? I now felt tears in my eyes, and I gulped to stop them from falling. “He isn’t home, so try your phone. I’ll talk to you later, Delilah.”

“I’ll talk to you later.”

When my mother hung up, I cried for a little bit until I finally called Jake. What had I done? River still loved me. And unless he never got his memory back, he always would love me. But here I was, fooling around with his best friend like it was no big deal.

“Hello, Delilah.”

When I finally called my brother, a voice that I definitely wasn’t expecting answered instead of his own. I quickly pulled my phone away to see if I had called the wrong number, but it was Jake’s number all right. I then remembered why this person would be picking up his phone, and my nose wrinkled in disgust.

“Arianna,” I greeted flatly, very unhappy that I had to hear her voice at a time like this. “It’s been a while.”

“It has.”

“How have things been?”

“Alright, I guess. It’s been a while since anyone over here in Washington has heard from you, isn’t it?” she asked me bitchily, and I wished I could have reached through the phone and strangle her. There was a reason that I never spoke to her and we weren’t friends anymore. It was because she was a self-centered bitch.

“I guess a lot’s just been going on for me,” I answered flatly, not in the mood to deal with her. I already had to deal with her for two and a half years in high school, I didn’t want to have to deal with her and I was in the crisis I was in right then. “Could you just give the phone to my brother? I’d like to speak to him.”

“How’s your emo boyfriend River?” she asked, completely ignoring me and going on with what she wanted to speak about. Typical Arianna. “Are you two still incredibly disgusting like the last time I saw you?”

“Actually, we broke up,” I couldn’t help but inform her, and I wanted to hit myself in the head after I had done so. Why was I telling her this? She didn’t have the right to know anything about me! “And he’s actually not emo anymore.”

“So you’re single?” she asked, and she seemed a little more excited than she should have been. If I said yes, she would have rubbed it in my face how she had a boyfriend and I didn’t, but then I’d just say how Ben James wanted me and not her. But then I was sure she would come back with saying how she was now going out with my brother, which I hated more than anything.

“Nope,” I answered with a smile, and I hoped that she realized that I was grinning like crazy. “I’m actually not. You remember Seth?”

I knew she was fuming now, and I loved it. “Yes, I remember Seth.”

“I’m going out with him now.”

“You’re kidding me!” she shouted, and I bit my lip to stop myself from bursting out into fits of uncontrollable laughter. Her reaction was just like how I thought it would be! “There’s no way you could be going out with someone like him! There’s no way!”

“Why?” I asked, not very amused. “Because you deem him worthy for yourself?”

“Yeah!” she cried, and I just couldn’t stop grinning. “If I think a guy’s hot, there’s no way he should be interested in you!”

“Like Ben James?” I couldn’t help but sneer as I asked her, biting on my lip to stop myself from laughing.

“I hate you so much.”

“The feeling’s mutual.”

“Here’s your brother,” she finally snapped, and I felt like jumping up and doing a happy dance, but I knew that would just make me puke once again. “Hopefully I’ll never talk to you again.”

“Love you, too!”

Even though I knew that this wouldn’t be the last time I’d speak to Arianna Devon, I hoped it would be the last as well. But if she was in a serious relationship with my brother, I was going to have to suck it up and deal with her if they ever got married.

But that didn’t mean I could hope.

“D?” Jake asked when he was finally given his phone, and I couldn’t help but smile at his nickname for me. “Is that really you? It’s been so long I don’t even know myself.”

“Alright, smartass,” I started, rolling my eyes at him when he started laughing. “I’m just calling to let you know that—”

“Yeah, Arianna already told me. You broke up with your boyfriend and now you’re going out with some other guy,” Jake finished for me, sounding very lazy and like he didn’t really care at all. “So you’re not going to be getting married right after graduation?”

“Obviously.”

“Well, that’s good,” he sighed, and I could tell he was smiling. I definitely wasn’t happy enough to smile. I hated the fact that all my feelings were so mixed up. Who did I love? River or Seth? “I didn’t want you throwing your life away on some high school boyfriend that you’d probably get bored with after a while.”

There was no way I could have ever gotten bored with River. I didn’t say anything to fight back, because I knew it wouldn’t have been a good idea to snap at him. I didn’t want to fight anymore, and yelling at him would have started that. But I knew I never would have gotten bored with River, if we weren’t even going out anymore.

“Yeah, I guess.”

“Well, I’ve got to go, D,” Jake informed me happily, but the last think I could do was smile. “I’ll talk to you later, alright?”

“Alright,” I sighed, playing with my pajama pants.

“Bye,” Jake laughed, and I hated picturing him grinning. He was with Arianna, who was my enemy but still the girl that he wanted to be with. I was stuck in between a guy that was in love with, and then another guy that didn’t know he was in love with me. I didn’t know who I was supposed to choose anymore at this point.

“Bye,” I repeated, though it sounded more like a cry for help to me.

After I hit the end call button, I wanted to throw my phone against the wall. I knew that it wasn’t a good idea, so I just dropped it onto the carpeted floor and collapsed back onto my bed. I really needed a good amount of sleep before I did anything else.

Just as I started to drift off, there were three loud and powerful knocks on my door. Why did everyone want to bother or annoy me today? I seriously just wanted to sleep this headache and nauseous feeling off.

I let out a groan, forcing myself up as I glared at the door. Who was knocking so early? It had to be Alice, right? Since Seth had gone back to his dorm, he probably kicked Alice out and she hadn’t brought her key or something.

Trudging over to the door, I opened it up to look at who was in the hallway. When I saw that it was no one, I was about to shut the door until I saw the folded white paper that was taped to the door. Letting out something that sounded like a groan and a sigh combined, I plucked it off the door and walked back inside my room, making sure to shut and lock the door behind me.

I sure hoped reading this didn’t give me an even bigger headache.

My darling Delilah,

I know what you and Seth did. River won’t be happy. I know I’m not.

                                                                            It’s What You Do to Me, Delilah

Well since it was so short, it didn’t give me a headache, but it sure did scare me.

Who the hell could this person be? It couldn’t have been Mr. Higginson because he was still in jail, but if it wasn’t him then who could it have been? It just didn’t make any sense. There was no way I attracted some other creepy stalker. How could this not be a prank? It had to be some kind of sick joke, right?

When I first started getting these notes, I was sure that they were just something someone thought was funny for a prank, like Gabe had done months before, but now I was starting to think differently.

These notes weren’t stopping, this person wasn’t getting bored. And it scared me.

I was now officially terrified.

*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~*

“Think of me,” I sang slowly as I closed my eyes and let myself find the keys on the piano. “Think of me fondly when we’ve said goodbye…”

It was so nice of Mrs. Davis to let me use her classroom so I could practice singing and playing the chords to Think of Me on the piano, and I couldn’t have been more thankful. I couldn’t play the piano, but the chords were easy for me. I was getting better and better every time I played it, and I was actually able to do it now with my eyes closed.

“Remember me every so often; promise me you’ll try…”

I breathed in and out, trying not to remember the first time I had ever sang this song. I was with both Seth and River, and Rex was there as well, and we were all in Bentwood. Ms. Vierra had forced me to come up and sing in the front of the class, and I was completely mortified. But that was what had brought me to Arkwright, all because of that.

That was probably why I liked to close my eyes when I sang this. Because I’d float back and remember the time I had to sing it at Bentwood, and even though River and I weren’t together back then, he had his memory and Kendra wasn’t in the picture.

“On that day, that not so distant day, when you are far away and—”

“You can sing and play the piano. You’re very talented for a psychotic girl.”

I snapped my eyes open and spun around to face whoever had spoken. I was pretty sure I knew who it was, since there was only one person that called me crazy. And that person, of course, was River.

I wasn’t going to tell him that I couldn’t really play the piano, I was just playing the chords, because I knew he didn’t care very much,.

“Is there something you need?” I snapped, looking away from him so I wouldn’t have to see him. If I looked at him, I’d just feel guilty for what had happened over the weekend between Seth and me, even though I couldn’t remember one thing about it. There was a time when River and I would do those types of things together, but that seemed like forever ago. I wondered if we'd ever be able to do things like that again. “I’d like to get back to work.”

“Chill, I just forgot my notes,” River scoffed, shaking his head as he passed me as he rolled his eyes. Since when did River ever say chill? That had to be Kendra’s doing. That was so something she would say, and I hated that she got River to say it now as well. “I’ll be out of your way in a few seconds, psycho.”

I was getting tired of him calling me crazy or insane, or anything that was like that. I wasn’t the crazy one, his stupid supposed fiancée was. He’d know someday that I was right. I just couldn’t wait for that day, even if it was too late to be with him. I just couldn't wait for him to see the mistake he had made. I couldn't wait to see how he had been tricked.

“Can’t you come up with any better insults?”

“Not really. You know, you got Kendra suspended,” River snapped at me as he looked under a chair for his stupid notes.

“Well, that’s good,” I informed him, crossing my arms over my chest as I tried not to smile. I didn’t want to get him too pissed off, but then again I kind of did as well. “She deserved it. She’s the one that attacked me, you know. Not the other way around.”

“Sure, whatever. Like I’ll believe that,” he scoffed, still searching around.

So what if I had started a fight with her once? It was one time! But I guess one time was enough for River to think that I started every kind of confrontation I had with his beloved little fiancée.

Even though I did kind of start it. But I didn't hit her first this time, she hit me! I didn't even get a chance to hit her back, but at least she got suspended and not me... Even though it would have been better if she had been expelled... But then she'd probably find a way to get River out of the school so he wouldn't be closer to me.

“Having trouble?” I asked flatly when he was still looking for his stupid notes, not even looking away from the piano as I placed my hands were they supposed to go to now.

“No,” River denied, though he was still looking around for these notes that he had been talking about. I finally looked away from the piano and looked around myself without even getting up from my bench, but I didn’t see any type of paper anywhere besides on the piano.

“There’s nothing in here,” I told him, and he turned to glare at me. It didn’t bother me, since I had gotten so used to it since he had lost his memory. “Why are you still looking? There’s nothing in here. And we both have last period in here, and I’ve been here since classes are over and no one else has come inside, so no one could have taken it. Are you sure you didn’t leave them in another class?”

River looked away from me, as if trying to think of a good excuse. When realization dawned on me, my eyes widened a little and my jaw practically disconnected from the rest of my head. “Did you… just make up that you were looking for your notes so you could come and see me?”

River’s eyes widened, and I swore that his cheeks turned bright pink. “No! Are you insane?”

I smiled, standing up from the bench and coming closer to him. He took a step away from me, still looking nervous, until he almost ran into a wall. He came in here with an excuse just to see me? That was a good sign, wasn’t it? Did that mean he remembered?

My smile quickly faded when he moved his arm, causing his sleeve to move up and reveal his wrist. When I saw fresh, new, red cuts just like I had had months before, I completely froze.

And that must have been why he was wearing long sleeved shirts all the time now. He used to just have scars, but now they were red cuts that looked like they had just been inflicted.

“River,” I whimpered, covering my mouth with my hands as I stared up at him. Just like the first time I had seen this, my eyes watered almost automatically. He had started cutting himself again? Why would he do something so stupid like that?

I was the reason he had stopped. And he didn’t have me anymore.

I stepped forward, grabbing onto his wrist. He recoiled before trying to pull out of my grasp, but I made sure to hold on tightly. When he tried to pull away again, I quickly shot our hands up and pinned his wrist against the wall above his head, just like I had done to him before.

But it was different than the first time. The first time this had happened, River wasn’t wearing a shirt and we were in his bathroom. Instead of having nothing in his hand, he had a razor, and I was trying to get him to stop cutting himself. That only resulted in him cutting his wrist right in front of me and for me to slap him across the face.

“I’m taller than you, you know. And stronger. Just because you can pin me against the wall doesn’t mean I can’t unpin myself.”

I blinked, my eyes going wide when I realized that this was exactly what River said when I had pinned him the first time. How could he not remember when he quoted himself perfectly? He had to be messing with me now or something!

Before I could even say anything, River squeezed his eyes shut and shook his head. “Ugh, déjà vu. This seems so familiar to me…”

My eyes widened even more. Déjà vu? He thought this was familiar! What was I supposed to say now? Was I supposed to tell him that it was familiar because it had happened before? What was I supposed to do now? This was all so confusing!

“This has happened before,” I whispered, staring down at the ground as I continued to clutch onto his wrist. “You don’t remember? River, this has happened before.”

“Stop lying,” he spat, ripping his wrist from my grasp but not moving himself from the wall or away from me. “How am I supposed to believe anything you have to say? You’ve lied and gotten so many people to lie for you. I hate people like that.”

“Then hate Kendra!” I shouted, stomping my foot as my hands balled into fists at my side. “If you hate people who lie, then you hate Kendra! She’s been lying to you the entire time! Why would you believe her? Don’t you feel anything at all? You can’t say you don’t feel anything for me at all! You have to—”

My shouting was abruptly cut off by River grabbing the sides of my head and pulling me closer to him. Our lips crashed together, and at first I couldn’t believe what was happening. But that didn’t stop me from wrapping my arms around his neck and pulling him even closer to me. I hadn’t kissed him in so long, and I missed the feeling of his lips and body against mine.

“You think I haven’t felt anything for you at all?” he breathed, his forehead pressing against mine. “Every time you’ve yelled at me or bitched at me, I’ve been so turned on it isn’t even funny. I don’t know how, but I have a connection with you. I can feel it.”

I stretched up on my toes and kissed him again. I was finally able to kiss him after what felt like years, even though it had only been a few months. It just felt like the longest time when I wasn’t with him.

“We’re meant to be,” I told him once he finally pulled away. “We really are, River. Believe me.”

River looked me up and down, and suddenly looked like he regretted what he had just done. He quickly backed away from me, wiping his lips with the back of his hand as he shook his head.

“No, we’re not,” he told me, causing my eyes to go wide in shock. “All I’m feeling for you is lust because you’re hot. That’s all it has to be. I just want to get into your pants.”

“You’ve been in them before,” I snapped, my eyebrows furrowing as I glared at him now. Even though Seth had been the one in my pants only days before, I wasn’t about to mention anything about that. I knew that wouldn’t help River get his memory back at all. “You’ve been in them so many times before.”

River shook his head. “You’re crazy.”

“You can’t tell me you felt absolutely nothing during those kisses,” I laughed without humor, one of my hands balling into fists as I stared up at him. “You had to feel something, River.”

“Yeah,” he agreed with a nod. “Lust. Only lust.”

“Stop denying it!” I yelled, taking another step toward him. “You started cutting yourself again, River! The last time you did that was when you thought you lost me to Avery! Now you think you’ve lost me because of Kendra!”

River sneered at me. “You really are insane.”

“I love you,” I professed, taking another step toward him. “I’m only crazy for staying in love with you even though you’re acting like a total jerk to me and calling me crazy and denying you have any feelings for me whatsoever! Stop lying to me and yourself and just tell me the truth, River!”

“I want to screw you,” he snapped, just to shut me up. “Happy? Ever since I saw you that day in the hospital, that’s all I wanted from you. I honestly don’t give a damn if I’m engaged to Kendra or not, as long as I get you into bed with me.”

“I know you don’t remember, but I’ve already been in bed with you,” I reminded him bitterly, placing both of my hands on my hips. “I’ve been in bed with you countless times. And we even slept in the same bed when we both lived in your apartment before the school year started. Why don’t you believe anything I say?”

“Because I’ve been told that you’re a liar.”

“By Kendra!” I cried, stomping my foot once again. He had never been this difficult before! Kendra completely ruined him! “She told you everything! She told you everything you know, and you won’t even listen to what hundreds of other people are telling you! Kendra is the insane one, River. Kendra is the reason you started cutting again, and I was the reason you stopped!”

He sneered at me once again. “It sure doesn’t seem like it.”

I wanted to smack him. I wanted to smack him so hard that he got a giant bruise on his face, just like he had when I had thrown the book at him. How could he be so rude and cruel to me even after he had kissed me and let me kiss him? Why did he have to act this way toward me?

“You’re going out with that Seth guy,” River shrugged, crossing his arms over his chest as if he didn’t give a damn, and I was sure that he didn’t. “Why don’t you just stick to him and leave me alone? I can live without getting in your pants.”

“You’re such a guy,” I spat, shaking my head in disgust at him. “And I’m not even sure how I feel about Seth right now, so just shut up about him.”

“If you don’t like Sethers anymore, why not Kendra’s brother Jay? You seemed pretty attached to him,” River sneered, but I was way too preoccupied with what he had called Seth. Did he just call him what I thought he called him?

“What did you just call Seth?” I asked, blinking at him in surprise. Rex was the only one that ever called Seth Sethers, and even he hadn’t done it in a while. How could River know that if he didn’t at least somewhat remember?

“Is it even important?” he asked, obviously bored out of his mind. “I’d like to leave now, if that’s okay with you.”

“Rex has only ever called Seth Sethers,” I informed him, taking a step closer. “Do you remember?”

River blinked at me. “I have no idea what you’re talking about. Stop acting so insane for once in your life. I’m leaving now.”

Shocking myself, I let him go and didn’t stop him from leaving. All I needed to know was that River had made up an excuse to see me, he was cutting again and used the same exact quote he had the first time, and he wanted to kiss me and sleep with me like he had used to. That was all I cared about right then.

Because he remembered something, even if he didn’t know what.

I fell to my knees then, not knowing what else I was supposed to do. I had slept with Seth, and River was slowly getting his memory back. This wasn’t a good thing. What was I supposed to do when River really did get his memory back? If both Seth and him loved me, what was I going to do? I couldn’t just share both of them…

When the door opened once again, I didn’t feel like looking up to see who it was. I just didn’t seem to have the energy anymore to even move. All I wanted to do was sleep until all of this madness passed over us all. But it seemed like that was never going to happen.

“Delilah?” the familiar voice asked, and I looked up to see my blonde best friend staring down at me in concern. I didn’t think it was him at first because he hadn’t called my by his stupid nickname for me. “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine,” I assured, though I was sure my position said differently. I tried to get up, but I found myself failing. “I’m just tired is all. I’ll be fine soon.”

“Well, that’s good,” Rex smiled, crossing his arms over his chest triumphantly. “Because I have a fool proof plan on getting River’s memory back. No need to thank me, really. It’s what I’m here for.”

After all the failed attempts at trying to get his memory back, what he said didn’t get my hopes up. I was sure that it was impossible for us to get River’s memory back, and we were just going to have to wait until it came back on its own, if it even did.

“Alright,” I sighed, sitting up a little more and leaning into a chair. “Tell me what your plan is, and we’ll see if it works or not.”

“Do you remember my amazing idea for your present for River on his birthday?” he asked, smiling way too triumphantly for his own good.

“Birthday sex?” I remembered flatly, my nose wrinkling as I thought of it. I would never understand how guys could talk to each other about sex so easily… “I highly doubt that River would have sex with me considering how much he hates me.”

Even though he did just admit that he did want to screw me…

“No, not that idea, though it was brilliant,” Rex grinned, and I only rolled my eyes. Couldn’t he just get to the point? Obviously not, since he was Rex and all. “And I highly doubt you’d want to have sex with River after the night you had with Seth last Friday.”

With my cheeks heating up, all I could do was stare at the floor. Had Alice told him, or had Seth told him? They better not have told anyone else! If everyone in the school found out and then River got his memory back, he’d be crushed! I’d never be able to live with myself if that happened…

“I think Katy Perry’s song is perfect for you,” he now commented, rubbing his chin as if he was in thought. “Since you were drinking and all and can’t remember a thing…”

I had come to a decision then. I was going to kill Rex Haynesworth one of these days.

“You’re a moron,” I snapped at him, crossing my arms over my chest and glaring. All he did was grin and laugh.

“There’s a stranger in my bed, there’s a pounding in my head!” he sang the first lines of that stupid song, and my eyebrows furrowed in annoyance at him. It wasn’t like he had a horrible voice or anything, but the whole idea just annoyed the crap out of me.

“Seth isn’t a stranger!”

“Might as well been.”

“Can you just get to your stupid fool proof plan?” I demanded, forcing myself off the floor and onto the chair that I had been leaning against. “I’d like to get back to my dorm and do my homework.”

“The scrapbook!” he cried, waving his arms around as he grinned widely. “The scrapbook with all those pictures of River, Seth, and me, and even the ones of him and Bekka! You got Bekka to come and talk to him, didn’t you? And then there’s the pictures of you and him! It’s perfect because it’s proof! There’s no way Kendra can deny that those photos are fake when they’re in a scrapbook and everything!”

I stared at Rex for a second. And for a second, I think it was about ten minutes. I was either the stupidest person on the planet, or Rex Haynesworth was the smartest. And I never thought that I’d see the day, but I had to say Rex Haynesworth was amazing.

And I was a complete idiot. Why hadn’t I thought of that in the first place? Everything would have been so much easier for everyone! Damn it!

“That is a fool proof plan,” I breathed, still kind of out of it from the shock of Rex actually coming up with a plan that would work. “I can’t believe you came up with that. That was so smart…”

“Hey! I’m smart, you know!”

Ignoring anything else he had to say, I quickly walked toward the door and clutched onto his hand, dragging him along with me. We were going to get River’s memory back. Those pictures were proof, and there was no way he or Kendra could deny them.

Rex Haynesworth truly was amazing.

I was such an idiot for not thinking of this before! How could I have totally forgotten all those pictures that Rex and Seth had gotten together for me? It was perfect! It was complete and total proof, and if it didn’t get River’s memory back, it would at least show him that Kendra was lying!

This was perfect. River’s memory was going to be back soon, and everything was absolutely amazing. Nothing could go wrong with Rex’s plan. It really was fool proof.

“Where’s the scrapbook?” Rex asked once we were outside Mrs. Davis’s room, and I had to stop and think about it for a moment. Where did River put it? It was either in the apartment we had lived in or in his dorm room… But wouldn’t he have found it by now if it was in his dorm room? Or Mountain would have found it at least, and I knew that he would have showed him…

“I think it’s in his apartment,” I answered with a nod, turning toward him as I smiled. “Either his apartment or his dorm room. But I think it’s the apartment, because he probably would have found it already if it was in his dorm room.”

Rex nodded. “Got it. You got a key?”

I nodded now. “Yep, it’s up in my dorm room. Are you going to go check it out and see if you can find it?”

Rex grinned. “Of course. I just hope I don’t find anything weird or suspicious that you two use in the bedroom or something. I do not to see anything like that.”

I closed my eyes and let out a groan. Same old Rex. Same old freaking Rex…

“Let’s go get the key,” I smiled, spinning on my heal and in the direction of my dorm. The sooner I gave Rex the key, the sooner River would get his memory back and the sooner everything would go back to normal. I just couldn’t wait to be in his arms again. Nothing could ruin how great I was feeling!

But then Seth walked out of one of the classrooms, and I completely froze. Rex noticed, and he frowned a frown so deep that I barely recognized him. Rex Haynesworth did not frown unless it was about something horrible, so I knew I was in a lot of trouble.

Seth smiled at me, making his way toward the both of us. I didn’t know what I was supposed to say to him or how I was supposed to act, so I just stared down at my feet and gripped onto the strap of my backpack, trying to avoid his gaze.

I had just kissed River. I never thought I would feel so guilty for kissing my fiancé.

“Hey,” Seth smiled, leaning over and kissing my forehead. It was all tingly after he had pulled away, and I liked that feeling. “You look upset. What’s wrong?”

“Actually,” Rex started for me so I didn’t have to, “we have a fool proof plan in getting River’s memory back.”

Seth’s smile faded for a moment, but it quickly reappeared on his face, though I could tell that now it was forced. “Really? What are you going to do?”

“The scrapbook that we made for his birthday,” I answered before Rex could do so for me once again. “We’re going to get it and show it to him. It was all Rex’s idea. I was pretty stupid for not thinking of it sooner.”

“I’m smart,” Rex declared in a pouting-like way, crossing his arms over his chest and looking away from me. “I just don’t choose to use my brain all the time. It’s as simple as that, really.”

I rolled my eyes, looking up from my feet to smile at my best friend. He was always going to be an idiot, wasn’t he? But how was Seth feeling? I knew how he really felt about me, but what was I supposed to do once River got his memory back?

I guessed I was just going to have to find out.

“Okay, Deli Sandwich, let’s go get the key,” Rex told me, starting toward the stairs that headed toward my dorm.

“Um, you go on ahead,” I told him when I saw Seth’s obvious frown that Rex was oblivious to. “I’ll catch up to you in a little bit. You know where my dorm is, and Alice should be there.”

Rex’s eyes lit up, and he smirked.

“Don’t do anything nasty in my room,” I warned, my eyebrows furrowing at him.

“If only Alice had said that to you last Friday night,” Rex sang the ending of his sentence  as he walked passed me, making sure to stretch out the last word for extra effect.

Once he was gone, I turned back toward Seth, who was frowning once again.

“Seth?” I asked, unsure how to approach him. “Are you alright?”

“Yeah,” he nodded, forcing out a smile. “I’m perfectly fine. Why wouldn’t I be?”

I stared at him unhappily. “Because River’s going to be getting his memory back only two days after you told me that you love me.”

Seth stared at the ground, obviously not wanting to be reminded. I felt so bad, but I couldn’t help but be in love with River. I loved Seth too, but… Did I love him the same way? I didn’t think I did.

But then again, I thought I did as well.

Seth leaned forward suddenly, planting a light kiss on my lips. He pulled away but kept his face two inches away from mine, and he smiled. “I’ll always love you, Delilah. No matter what happens.”

I nodded, looking down at the ground. “Thank you, Seth, for just… being there for me when I needed someone. I love you, too.”

He smiled sadly at me, reaching over and soothing out my hair. “Sadly I think our love is very different.”

Was it different? I didn’t really think it was. Even though I was always going to be in love with River, I felt like I loved Seth as well. But I couldn’t have them both, I knew, so I was going to have to figure this out.

“No, Seth,” I sighed, shaking my head and staring down at the ground. “I really do love you, too.”

Seth stared at me in shock, obviously not expecting me to say this to him. But how couldn’t I? He had been there for me when River wasn’t, but then River was there for me with everything else.

What was I supposed to do? It wasn’t like I could have both of them…

“I’ve been waiting for you to say that forever, Delilah,” Seth now smiled, leaning forward and brushing his lips to mine once again. I felt so horrible because even though I did love him, I loved River as well. I was never going to be able to stop loving River, no matter how hard I tried.

I felt so confused and trapped and I had no idea what to do.

I loved River, and I knew that he at least felt something for me with his memory gone. The kiss River and I had just shared proved it. Even though he called it lust, I knew he felt something for me.

But then Seth loved me, and he even had before River lost his memory. And I was starting to feel the same way about him as well, and now I was feeling guilty. Especially now when I found out that we had a way to get River’s memory back.

But River was my fiancé… He was the one that I was meant to be with. I was just going to have to find a way to get through this tough situation once River remembered everything. I didn’t even think I wanted to know how he reacted…

“I’m off to the apartment!” Rex suddenly announced as he bounded down the stairs. “River’s going to have his memory back in no time! You’re not going to have to worry anymore, Deli Sandwich!”

I couldn’t help but smile, even though I was still worrying on the inside. I couldn’t wait for River to finally remember who I was.

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Last Friday Night by Katy Perry kept playing over and over again in my head as I wrote this. xD It's funny because I had to do a skit with that song with my group in my drama class and I had to act drunk in it, just like Delilah. 

I know, super long chapter. xD I'm trying to get this finished!

Please COMMENT, VOTE, and FAN! :D