The cold wind brushed through my hair, and I couldn’t help but find it soothing and calming, just what I needed. Everything had been so hectic lately.

Keeping Jay and the note a secret from River was harder than I thought. Usually he could tell when I was lying to him, but for some reason, now he couldn’t. I wanted to tell him more than anything, but I just couldn’t There was nothing he had to worry about… I hadn’t even gotten another note yet…

But it still gnawed at me, little by little. I felt so guilty for lying to him… He didn’t deserve any of that. He told me everything…

At least, I believed he did. I was sure there were some things that he didn’t want to share with me. Like things from his past, or things with his family. Both were touchy subjects when it came to River. But after learning about his past and what his family had done to him, I didn’t really blame him. It was a miracle that he was on good terms with Tanner now.

But I felt even guiltier about not telling him about Jay. He’d really get angry if he learned Jay tried to get me to break up with him… Even if I tried to tell him that I’d never do that, he would still be angry and probably go get Seth and Rex to go help him beat Jay up or something…

They were good fighters separately, so I was scared what they would be like together. Seth had killed three guys on his own, Rex kicked the crap at out Paul, and River did a pretty good job on Avery. But I had seen them fight together only once, and that was with Mr. Higginson. And yet, Mr. Higginson was still able to overpower them… That was probably what scared me the most.

I used to never like being alone. I still didn’t like it very much, but now I found it soothing and calming. I wanted to be completely left alone as I continued to sit on the park bench in silence, my arms wrapped around my legs as my chin rested on my knees.

Rex had gotten Seth and River in trouble, so they all had detention. Rex just wouldn’t shut up in class, and Seth and River were his unfortunate victims. So I couldn’t hang out with them. Marnie had to do something at Eden, and then Alice had work. I thought about just hanging out at the coffee shop with her, but I remembered how Avery went there a lot. I definitely didn’t want to see him when I was all alone, especially since he was probably with Bekka.

But I enjoyed the peace and quiet that surrounded me. I could hear the soft laughter of the children that played on the playground a few feet away from me, but it didn’t bother me in the slightest. I thought about what it was like when I was a child, how I didn’t have anything to worry about and all I cared about was having fun.

I missed those times. Though I hadn’t known any of my friends back then, I still kind of wished I could go back and be a kid again. Because back then, I didn’t even know Mr. Higginson. And when I was six-years-old, he was only sixteen.

It was weird thinking about him as a teenager, as a child. He’d always just been my teacher, and then just my stalker after that. But he was a person; he had a family and friends. But that definitely didn’t erase what he had done to my friends, family, and me. He was still the insane nutcase that tried to kill my fiancé and kidnap me for himself. And I’d never forget that part about him.

But what was he like when he was my age? Did he have brothers or sisters? He had told me the night at the fair that he was visiting his sister… I knew that that was a lie, but what if he really did have a sister that was sick? Not that I’d feel bad for him, but I’d feel bad for her…

No. He was just lying, I was sure. But the thought was still in my head. Did he have any siblings? What did his family do when they found out what he had been doing?

And what about the faculty at my old school? My stomach dropped when I thought of them. Everyone at my old school was informed about what had happened, even though I had no idea why. I was sure that it was Arianna’s doing, but then the principal had to tell the teachers what had happened.

I was sure that they were surprised. How couldn’t they be? Mr. Higginson always seemed so nice. It wasn’t like he had been my favorite teacher or anything, but he definitely wasn’t the worst. Even though he was the worst now… He wasn’t back then.

I shook my head, trying to rid the thoughts I had of Mr. Higginson. Jeez, why did I always have to think about him? It wasn’t necessary, and it was just a burden. But I knew he’d always be in my mind, no matter how hard I tried to get him out.

“You look like a loner.”

Well, maybe I wanted to feel like a loner. I really didn’t want to be bothered by anyone at all.

The voice made me jump so high that I almost fell off the bench. My fingernails dug into the wood of the bench to stop me from falling off, and I cussed loudly in my head at the pain I felt.

Great. Splinters.

I looked over to the person who had scared me, and I glared hatefully at Jay. Why was he here? How had he found me so easily? What, was he stalking me now?

No, Delilah. Don’t think like that.

The air was chilly since it was now early November. We were getting closer and closer to the day I had first met River, Rex, and Seth the year before. It was late November when I had gone to Bentwood, a few days before December. Right after Thanksgiving…

“What are you doing here?” I snapped at him, rubbing my hands over my arms lightly. I always seemed to never bring a jacket anywhere. Usually River was there to give me his jacket… It was sweet, but sometimes I wished that he would just keep it on. I didn’t want him getting cold.

“This is a public park,” Jay informed me, as if I didn’t know. He plopped down on the bench next to me, putting his arm up behind my shoulders. I scooted away from him, a look of disgust evident on my face. Even though he hadn’t really put his arm around me, it was still close.

“Aw, come on, Delilah,” Jay smirked. “Live a little.”

“I do live,” I spat at him. “I live with my fiancé River.”

Jay sighed, keeping his arm behind me. “Why do I have a feeling that that marriage isn’t going to last.”

I gave him a sour look. “I don’t know. Why do you?”

“Because you’re too young,” he answered his own question, and he wasn’t smirking any longer, surprising me a little. “You’re too young for a serious thing like marriage. You’re way too young. Seriously, you may think you love him or something, but what about in ten years? Or even five years? Who knows how you’ll feel then? Maybe you’ll meet the person you’re really supposed to be with. Maybe you’ve already met him…”

I gave him a flat look. “Are you insinuated that you’re the person I’m supposed to end up with?”

Jay looked away from me and at the children playing a few feet away from us. “Nope. Just saying.”

“It sure sounded like that’s what you were saying.”

“Whatever.”

“We’re not planning on getting married until after college,” I informed him, as if he had the right to know. “We’re not going to get married until we’re both an appropriate age and we both have jobs. So that’s a least four years. So if River doesn’t want to be with me for the rest of our lives, he’ll figure it out during those four years.”

“What if you want out?” Jay now asked quizzically. “What if you find out that you don’t want to spend the rest of your life with him?”

I raised my nose up in the air. “That’s not going to happen.”

“But what if you get pregnant or something in those four years, and then one or both of you want out?” he inquired, an eyebrow raised.

“That isn’t going to happen!” I shouted.

“You sure you’re not pregnant?” Jay asked once again, looking away from the kids and at me now. “Because you’re sitting by a bunch of kids, looking all depressed. Are you sure you’re not just lying about being pregnant or something? You can’t really lie about it for much longer, because your body’s going to betray you soon.”

“I’m not pregnant!” I shrieked, causing concerned mothers to look over at us with their eyebrows furrowed. My face grew hot, and I glared down at the wood of the bench. “I’m not pregnant.”

“Uh-huh.”

“I’m not!”

As I looked up from the bench and to the trees that surrounded the park, I let out a scream when I saw Mr. Higginson leaning against one of them, smirking at me. He quickly ducked behind it, still smirking as he went hiding into the rest of the trees.

Jay was staring at me strangely. “You alright?”

“I’m fine,” I gasped, breathing in and out to calm myself. These damn hallucinations… They were always so real! Why was he still torturing me like this? Hadn’t I suffered enough after everything he had put me through? Apparently I didn’t, since I still had to see him so much.

When my breathing started to get back to normal, Jay was still looking at me funny. I rubbed my forehead, letting out a long sigh before looking back up at the trees cautiously once again. No one was there, just like I thought. There were just trees.

Damn hallucinations.

“Whatever. But what I just don’t understand is what a girl like you sees in some emo like him,” Jay sighed, shaking his head and crossing his arms over his chest. “Why not go out with me? Like I’ve said before, I’m handsome, rich, famous…”

“And River’s all of those things except for famous,” I snapped at him, crossing my arms over my own chest. “And I like it that way. I don’t want paparazzi hanging all over us like we’re some kind of plaything. I’m sure you love it, but I definitely wouldn’t. The kids at school are already enough.”

“Who said I liked paparazzi?” Jay asked, putting his arm behind me once again. I didn’t scoot away this time, but I did glare at him. “Paparazzi are a big pain. I hate it.”

“Sure you do,” I sneered at him. “Where are they, anyway? Shouldn’t they be all over you now? I mean, you are the most famous person on the planet, aren’t you? I’m surprised no one’s recognized you yet…”

Jay sighed. “Me, too.”

As if on cue, a sudden flash blinded me for a moment. Just as I was starting to focus once again, more flashes went off. I blinked, trying to figure out what was going on until I could hear shouting from various people.

“Jay! Jay Harris! So the rumors are true! You really are in New York! Does that mean that the rumor that you’re going to the Arkwright Academy is true?”

“Jay! Who’s this mystery girl?”

“Is she your girlfriend?”

I heard Jay’s name shouted many times, drowning out any questions that anyone else had asked. How was I supposed to get out of this? These people had taken pictures of me…

I found myself freezing when I realized this. These people took pictures of me… Just like Mr. Higginson had!

The memory of Mr. Higginson’s van full of pictures of me flashed through my head, causing me to start shaking. There were just so many pictures… In some of them I was alone, but then in some I was with family and friends. There were picture of Avery and me, pictures of me with Seth, Rex, and River… I felt so violated even though I was fully clothed in every picture. I never knew that he was following every move I made, seemingly always two steps ahead.

I continued to shake, but not nearly as bad as I used to shake when I remembered Mr. Higginson, which was a good thing. Maybe I was finally started to get over it, even if it was only a little. None of the paparazzi noticed, however, but Jay sure did. He looked at me in surprise, clutching onto my wrist and ignoring the paparazzi almost completely. How could he pretend they just weren’t there?

I started to believe that maybe Jay Harris really didn’t like the paparazzi.

And maybe that he didn’t really like being famous at all.

*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~*

My mother wanted me to come home with her for Thanksgiving, but for some reason River’s parents wanted us to go and spend it with them.

Normally, River would have said no right away. The last interaction he had with his father was punching him in the face in front of his entire family. I didn’t really think River wanted to be around any of those people anymore. He had already told me how he thought that they all had already written him out of their will, but he didn’t really care very much for that.

“You’re actually considering it?” I asked, crossing my arms over my chest as I sat on his bed. “Why are you considering going near your father again?”

“They’re my family, Delilah,” River sighed, sinking onto the bed next to me. “They invited both of us to go. It’s not just my parents that are going to be there, but my whole family. Not all of them really got to meet you last time considering what happened…”

I frowned, reaching over and cupping his cheek. “Do you want to go?”

River sighed once again. “I really don’t know. Tanner wants me to go, since he’s going. And since he’s going, Julie’s going, too. My parents wanted to meet her.”

“Julie’s going to be there?” I asked, my eyes brightening immediately. I hadn’t seen her since I had left for the school year again back in August… It was November now! “I’d get to see her?”

“I knew that that would make you want to go,” River smirked slightly, wrapping his arm around my waist. “But, yeah. She’s going. She wanted to see you, so she got excited when she heard that you might be there. Why don’t we just go? We’ll stay clear of my dad, if you want. I can’t just stay away from my family forever. They are the ones paying for my apartment until I get my own job…”

“Fine,” I shrugged in defeat. “I’ll go. But you can’t leave my side. Not once.”

He kissed the top of my head. “I wasn’t planning on it.”

The door suddenly burst open, surprising me. I thought that it would be Mountain, but I remembered that he said that he’d be practicing with the band until six, and it was only four thirty. I then looked over to the door and saw the next person I would think it would be.

“Happy one year anniversary, Deli Sandwich!” Rex cried, running over and wrapping his arms around my shoulders. “We met you a year ago!”

“Rex!” I cried, trying my best to breathe through his hold. “We met after Thanksgiving, you idiot! It hasn’t been a year yet!”

Rex pulled away from me, looking like he was trying to think for a moment. I hoped thinking didn’t hurt him…

“Really?” he asked, his eyebrows rising. “I thought it was before Thanksgiving…”

I shook my head. “Nope.”

Someone smacked the back of Rex’s head, and I smirked and look back at them, expecting to see Seth with a smirk and a smart remark. But who I saw was Alice, giving her boyfriend a look that told him that she couldn’t really believe how stupid that was.

“Where’s Seth?” I asked, looking around in case I had somehow not seen him. Marnie was doing something for school, so she couldn’t have come over after school that day. But Seth…?

Rex shrugged, walking over and plopping down on the couch, Alice following after him. “He didn’t want to come,” he answered simply. “He was all game with going somewhere, until we said we were going to go see if you guys wanted to come join.”

Okay. Something was definitely up. It was either with River or me, but it was definitely one of us. He didn’t want to go anywhere if we were going? What had happened?

He barely even spoke to me anymore. The only interaction I ever had with him was frowns, and it was seriously starting to bother me now. What the hell was his problem? It was really starting to bother me…

River looked like he could tell something wasn’t right either, but he didn’t say anything about it. I wanted to marched right over to Seth’s dorm, barge in, and demand he tell me what was wrong. But I knew that I didn’t have enough guts to do that, no matter how close Seth and I were.

“I think he’s sick or something,” Rex said again, turning on the TV and flipping through channels. “He hasn’t been himself lately. He barely talks.”

I blinked, confused. Seth wasn’t exactly the most talkative person, but he wasn’t a mute or anything. What was wrong with him? Did River do something? Did I do something?

I froze slightly when I thought of something. What if Marnie told him about Jay? But why would Seth get all distant just because of that? It didn’t make any sense. If anything, he wouldn’t even care. Maybe he would have gotten angry, but he would have told River.

I froze even more when I thought that maybe he knew that I got gotten a note. How could he find out about that? And Seth was the kind of person that would confront me about it in private. But had he not done that yet? I wouldn’t know why he would be acting this way though.

I stood up from River’s bed, patting down my skirt. “I need to go get something from my dorm,” I lied, turning toward the door. “I’ll be right back.”

“You want me to come with you?” River asked, standing up from his bed as well.

I turned toward him slightly, offering him a small smile. “No, I’m fine. I’ll be right back, I promise.”

He nodded, walking over and plopping down next to Rex on the couch. They continued to stay fixed on the TV as I walked out the door, soundlessly shutting it behind me. I let out a breath, going to opposite way to my dorm and in the direction of Seth’s.

When I got in front of it, I hesitated for a moment. Marnie must have told him, she had to. Seth was the person that she trusted the most… Why wouldn’t she have told him?

Before I even knew what I was doing, I raised my hand and rapped my knuckles against his door. My eyes widened a little when I realized what I was doing, but it was too late to run away as he opened the door.

When he saw that it was me, his eyes widened slightly. I tried to act tough, but I was sure I was failing. How could I act tough around Seth Haven? He was Seth Haven! The toughest guy on the history of the universe! Or just the toughest guy I had ever met…

“We need to talk,” I told him, walking past him and into his room. This reminded me of the time that he had done this to me, but he was so much angrier than I was back then. Actually, I wasn’t even angry at all. I was confused. I just wanted to know what was wrong with my best friend. He never acted this way.

“Okay,” he said slowly, closing the door behind me. “What do you want to talk about?”

“What’s up with you?” I blurted, getting straight to the point. “Why have you barely been talking, and why do I see you frowning at me every time I look at you? Why did you not want to go anywhere when you found out River and I were going to be there as well? What’s up with you, Seth? Aren’t I you’re best friend?”  

Seth looked me straight in the eye. “You are my best friend.”

The way he was saying this made it sound like he was trying to convince someone. Convince me, convince himself… What was with his tone?

“Did Marnie tell you?” I asked, crossing my arms over my stomach. “Did she?”

He blinked at me. “Tell me what?” he inquired, looking confused.

“About Jay trying to get me to break up with River!” I cried out before I could stop myself. I immediately slapped a hand over my mouth, biting my tongue as well. If Marnie didn’t tell him, I guess that didn’t matter anymore! Jeez, I was so stupid…

“She didn’t tell me that,” he told me, shaking his head as his eyes went wide. “Jay tried to get you two to break up?”

“He wants me for himself,” I sneered in disgust, shaking my head. I laughed without humor. “He thinks I’m going to break up with River just because he’s famous. That’s not going to happen…”

“Does River know?”

“No, and I don’t want him to,” I answered. “I don’t want him worrying over something that doesn’t even matter. I’m not leaving him for anyone… Unless he leaves me, we’re not going to break up.”

If Seth didn’t know about Jay, then… Oh, no. Did he know about the note?

“Do you know about the note I got?” I rambled on, not having any control over my mouth anymore. “Is that why you’re being so distant or something? Why would you be distant just because I got another note? Wouldn’t you want to help me?”

Seth’s eyes widened. “You got another note?”

Oh, crap.

I was just blurting everything today, wasn’t I?

“Please don’t tell River,” I pleaded. “I don’t want him worrying. It was probably just a prank, it was probably nothing. That was almost a month ago, and I haven’t gotten another one since. Please… don’t tell anyone. River would go insane if he found out I was getting more notes. Don’t tell him, Seth. Please don’t tell him…”

Tears burned my eyes as I thought of what River would do if he found out. First he would be worried, then he’d hunt down every single person in the school, counting the teachers, and then he’d be angry. At me.

“I won’t,” Seth whispered, clutching onto my wrist and pulling me closer to him. This movement surprised me, but I didn’t pull away from him. I had hugged Seth countless times before; he was just trying to comfort me so I wouldn’t start crying. “I won’t tell him.”

“Thank you,” I whimpered into his chest. “I don’t want him worrying… After everything I’ve put him through… He was shot because of me, River. He almost died because of me!”

“Shh,” he soothed. “It’s alright.”

I knew that it was alright. In a few minutes, I’d be okay again. I was just happy that I could finally let my emotions out to someone. I could finally tell someone my secrets. Even though Marnie knew about Jay, she couldn’t know about the note.

“It’ll be alright…”

I knew that it would be. Someday, everything was going to be alright. Someday, all my problems and worries would be behind me. Someday, I would be married to River with kids of our own.

I couldn’t wait for that day.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The picture on the side is so perfect that I was speechless. I just found it and was like, "Holy crap! It's River!"

It's scarily perfect. o.o

This may be the last time I update for the next week and a half. I have a yearly week-long family reunion to Lake Tahoe starting on Saturday. I'm bringing my laptop, but last year I brought my laptop and only ended up writing three sentences. -_- But I'll try my best and try to update!

Please COMMENT, VOTE, and FAN! :D