I swear I was happy. I was happy three years ago.

Flashback

"Hey Joon what's with the smile" my best friend said

"I'm happy. I happy cause life it's beautiful. Believe that" i said

"He's the happiest man I swear" my best friend said to the group of my friends.

End of flashback

I had friends. Everyone loved me. I was happy with my life.

"Happy with life? How?" I said and laughed again.

I want to scream. I want to scream to the world for help. But I end up screaming from pain. My soul hurts.

I end up writing songs to tell everyone what I am afraid to say. I'm afraid I'll hurt them like I did before.  Please can someone hear me? Can someone save me? Heal me?

I swear I am not weak. I was strong for too long. I'm just tired to fix everyone's problems and never fix mine. But that how I trick myself. That's how I don't solve my own problems.

But that's how I am. I never take the blame! It's everyone's fault that I'm like this, isn't it?