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I Don't Like The Way


I don't like the way I roleplay,
I don't like the way I talk,
I don't like the way I type,
I don't like the way I look,
I don't like the way I see,
I don't like the way I cry,
I don't like the way I surrender,

I don't like the way I put chemicals on myself,
I don't like the way I compare myself,
I don't like the way I falsely hope,
I don't like the way I apologize after I've done nothing wrong,
I don't like the way I am accused of being the enemy,

I don't like the way I reach in,
I don't like the way I close in,
I don't like the way I get hurt from nothing,
I don't like the way I see my friends sad,
I don't the way I've become so careless,
I don't like the way I study for the unexpected virtue,

I don't like how I think about killing myself by looking at everything,
I don't like the way I see the world as it is,
I don't like the way I loose motivation in my own mental state,
I don't like the way I try choking myself,
I don't like the way I ask, "If I killed myself, what would you do?"

But what I do like,

                                   is being alive.

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