• • •

San

I don't appreciate the exact feeling I get once I step into the familiar clearing that showcases my relative's home in the nearest distance. The feeling's intrusive and gut wrenching, forming and twisting knots in my stomach. They leave me almost breathless. My lungs beg for air as anxiety burns through my veins like wildfire, and I chew on my chapped bottom lip, the metallic taste of my blood sizzling my tongue. But it doesn't matter though. It'll heal soon anyway.

I don't know why I'm like this. At least, I don't know why I'm like this when I'm only just paying my grandmother an impulsive, but very needed visit due to how unstable my emotions are at this point in time.

And she was already aware of it. Hongjoong and his parents had agreed to call up a driver that'd transport me over to where she lives, and even though I could tell then that Hongjoong wasn't too pleased about my sudden need for absence, I was -- still am -- grateful for his coorperation. He, and his parents especially, seemed like a set of insanely friendly people, and I found that comforting despite me envying the relationship they had in the tiniest bit.

The marble beneath my feet shines, reflecting my narrowed brows, dark eyes and hardened jaw. I look tired, and I feel tired as well, and the image that greets me when I stare at the ground only worsens my mood. I look horrible.

I take a couple steps forward, the small bag I brought along for the weekend trip to Hongjoong's house tight in my grip. I try to keep my head clear as I become more and more covered by the numerous wild trees that shield my grandmother's entire fortress from view, but it's hard to so. Extremely hard.

My mind's nothing but a fog, white noise that draws out the static in my ears and the eerie thumping of my almost dormant heart. And if things can't get worse enough, an image of a boy proceeds to insert itself into the mess I call my thoughts, crackling through the void like a flashlight flickering in the dark, and I remember how I was supposed to swim with him today.

I lightly scoff to myself. The promise sounds almost like some stupid wish now considering the dire situation my mental state is in, but yet still I can't seem to shake off the disappointment I feel at the realization that I'm probably not going to be seeing him for the rest of today.

I tell myself it's not worth it. I can't keep thinking about him because there isn't a valid reason to. But, like the stubborn roots of the trees surrounding me, his face refuses to untangle itself from the soil of my mind. No, his face forces itself to stay there. The coffee brown of his eyes digs itself deeper into the crevices of my head, and his glowing smile wraps around my vision, warming me up like the sun.

And like a tree needing its next dose of sunlight, I can't get enough. I grumble at this, wishing I had a way to get rid of all these thoughts about him.

The fortress's gates await me with open arms, weathered due to the climate yet welcoming in every way possible. I quicken my steps until I approach the large wooden doors, not mindful of the way those gates immediately shut due to the old protective magic guiding them. Chinese characters and symbols decorate the sturdy exterior of the doors, and the small outdoor lamps have already been lit, complementing the fuzzy peach and lavender backdrop of the evening sky.

The thought of lavender makes me remember Wooyoung again. Makes me remember his kind smiles and round, curious eyes. His earthy toned skin, his comforting touch and this distinct air of his that's slightly awkward, yet unique and adorable.

What am I, a clingy boyfriend? I think bitterly. I should really stop thinking about Jung Wooyoung. Imagining his face feels like an invasion of privacy, and not to mention it makes me feel like a total creep.

"Choi San," a voice, borderline accusatory, starts, "what trouble did you manage to land yourself into this time?"

A stern pair of eyes meet mine from the now opened doorway, but the harshness in them quickly fades, leaving behind warmth and happily crinkled eyes. Even after all these years, my grandmother always gets me with how fast her demeanor changes. Either way, I let myself sink into her touch as her arms engulf me, the dark waves of her hair tickling the sides of my jaw.

"Oh, dear," her fingers run down my black locks soothingly, "it's happening again, isn't it?"

I can only nod, not having the energy to speak.

"What about Headmaster Jung? Didn't he set you up with a magic caster like I asked him to? If not I won't hesitate to call him and give him a piece of my mind -- "

"Ma -- " I interrupt, hating the way I stutter, shaking like a leaf in her hold. Wooyoung's face burns itself into the back of my eyelids in its irritatingly pleasant glory, and I shake my head to pry it off. "No, I -- I got assigned to a witch for a roommate, just like you'd asked. I-I just needed to -- to get away. For a while."

My grandmother, just like always, understands my ramblings perfectly. She nods and lets me inside, the walls of her abode practically leaking security and peace. Most of my nerves have reduced entirely, and I'm brought back to the memorable times I shared with my grandma in this place. This place had probably seen all my best, and worst, moments.

"You should go sit down," Grandma advises. "I'm gonna go make you something warm to eat."

I turn to her, frowning a bit. "I don't need to eat anything. I already fed on some blood earlier today, so there's no reason why you should cook me anything."

Grandma just purses her lips, her red-rimmed gaze piercing through me like a silver dagger. "San... you and I both know there is a reason why."

If her stare's the piercing dagger, then her words are the deadly stab to the heart that stops me from breathing.

"And after you're done eating," Grandma continues, noticing how stiff I've gotten, "I'll do something about cleansing your aura."

• • •

Wooyoung

I'll be a huge liar if I said I'm perfectly content as of now, because I'm not. Arriving back at my college dorm has never felt emptier, especially when it's now void of the one person that kept me on my toes with worry, yet brought easy smiles to my face and brightened my mood whenever he was around. The first night without San was spent feeling restless, my head overflowing with questions that I just couldn't find the answers to. And then the night ends.

And then a day passes, and then two. Then three. Five. Then a whole week.

Classes zoom past me in a blur, and I can't concentrate on any of my courses for the life of me. My thoughts keep drifting off, keep settling on a certain vampire with dark hair and a set of dimples that light up his whole face. A vampire with a pretty smile, light freckles and guarded eyes that hold things he'll never be able say out loud, things buried deep inside his scarlet gaze.

Even my friends, despite not knowing San for a long amount of time, are puzzled by his absense as well. And I'm pretty sure they can all tell how worried I get from time to time because to his sudden disappearance. But anytime they comment on it, I always shut their assumptions down, because denying things is a lot easier than admitting just how much thoughts of San had been plaguing my mind as of late.

• • •

On Saturday, Yunho has the brilliant idea of bringing us to the school's recreational courtyard to, in his words, 'have a long overdue bonding moment'. And yes, I am just as excited about this as I am crushing dry, smelly leaves for a potions lab.

Yunho whizzes past me and towards the shed of wizarding brooms by the rental at the edge of the court, his chestnut brown mop of curls bouncing along with his every movement. His smile is as bright as ever as he comes back out with two brooms, and I arch my brows at him, folding my arms. I suppress a shiver at the chill in the air, quickly mumbling a warming spell to heat me up since my long coat isn't doing anything for me.

"You're sulking too much," Yunho explains, passing me a broom that's suitable for my size. "You're gonna make it snow early."

"Yeah, right," I snort, but a part of me feels grateful that he took the time to hang out with me despite how cranky I had been lately. "That's just superstition."

"I'm serious. I get the worst tomato-face in winter," Yunho replies, positioning his much larger broom. "I'd like to not look like Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer for a little while longer, thank you very much."

I position myself on the broom, chuckling a little at my friend's words. Yunho, despite having the power to bend any part of the earth at will, also has a bit of witch blood in him, which enables him to use a wizarding broom like I can. "Okay, okay Yun. I understand. What I also understand is that," I balance my weight on the broom, hiking it upwards to float, "I'm so gonna kick your ass at this!"

Yunho immediately flies after me, guffawing at my overdramatic use of the 'evil laugh'. "Not on my watch, Wooyoung!"

I slam my weight on my broom, accelerating its speed as it crashes through the air, every bit as chaotic as I feel right now. The wind coasts through my dark brown locks, pressing against my exposed forehead, but at that moment, I swear I feel more alive than ever.

Yunho's still tagging along behind me, his face set in a rather childlike expression of determination when I turned around to grin impishly at him, and I only smirk when he flies past me with a freezing whoosh. Oh, he's messed with the wrong guy.

I press against my broom, making myself smaller as the broom swims past the green heads of trees and low, thin clouds. There's only a limit to how far the brooms can take us, and that's up to the clearing in the distance showcasing a small abandoned town left in ruins. I dive lower into the greenery, zig-zagging through all the obstacles until I'm sure Yunho's lost sight of me. I can still see him up ahead though, his form almost touching the bright blue sky.

And then I'm suddenly up in the air in front of him, giving him the fright of his life. I let out another round of my evil laugh and zoom back into the direction we came from, but then almost flip over when Yunho's broom clashes against the back of mine.

"Wow, real mature Yunho!" I call out as he whisks past me, and I laugh loudly when he just sticks his tongue out at me like the overgrown puppy he is.

I make a move to head straight for him, only for him to turn his head and say --

"You looked real cuddly with San last Saturday night in front of that pool. Did you guys end up kissing or something?"

I know Yunho's only teasing me, because that's how he is and he likes to joke around (he also wants to distract me from getting back to the college grounds first), but I can't help but feel a little bit stunned.

"Hey, wait -- How did you know San and I hung out at that time?" I ask, but Yunho just winks and races into the trees, getting significantly ahead of me, but I'm a bit too dazed and surprised to act quickly.

Eventually, I regain my momentum though, but by the time I arrive back at the courtyard, Yunho's already there, 'innocently' grinning at me.

My boots crunch the cropped grass of the courtyard as I march towards him, digging my pointer finger into his rib. "Jeong Yunho. I demand an explanation young man."

Yunho's larger hand grabs mine and presses it against his cheek. He then leans into it.

Aft first, I'm a bit stupified at Yunho's display, not really getting what he's trying to say, but soon after it hits me.

And then my giant friend's suddenly getting slapped on the arm repeatedly. He winces and pouts, wriggling out of my grip.

"Ow ow ow ow! What did I do?"

"That enchanted orange flowered plant!" I exclaim. "You'd been spying on us!"

"No, I wasn't," Yunho denies, but then guilt sheds into his gaze. "Well, I wasn't at first. I'd just been catching up on my courses on plant possession, and Mingi wanted to see what I could do since he had trouble falling asleep. Then you showed up, and Mingi and I ended up watching you and San talk. It was so cute."

"So you're telling me Mingi saw us as well?"

This time, Yunho's grinning proudly. "Yep. He thought it was cute too."

In retrospect, I'm not even sure why I'm even mad my friends had managed to catch sight of San's and I's conversation by the pool, but some part of me -- this small, hidden part, had desperately wished that whole thing between us had been a private one. I end up sighing.

Yunho peers down on me, his expression suddenly turning serious. He plants a hand on my shoulders. "Woo, it's okay to feel worried for San. You don't have to pretend that you're not. I guess you two must've became good friends, because that look on your face alone shows that you care a lot about him."

"But -- " I begin. Yunho only cuts me off.

"No buts," he says, and I can only snort at his lame attempt at a joke. He chuckles as well. "Anyway, what I'm saying is, you gotta chill, dude. I'm worried about San's disappearance as well but I know he's gonna show up sooner or later. Stop stressing yourself out."

"But...what if something bad happened to him?" My voice is pathetically small, and I can't believe I just muttered those words out loud. Yunho, however, just laughs.

"Nah. Last time I checked, he's a vampire. And vampires are pretty strong guys."

I don't know if that's supposed to make me less worried, or even more stressed out.

"Also," Yunho continues to talk. I follow him to the broom rental shed and wait outside. When he heads back out, he slings an arm over my shoulders and ruffles my hair. "I have an idea of how we two bros could spend the night." He lightly tugs at my hair as if he's trying to tell me something.

I just shake my head. "What?"

"I've heard a good ol' makeover can strengthen spirits." Yunho then pats my head, laughing when I try to swat his hand away. "And you've had that same hair colour for a while..."

"Yeah, well I'm okay with brown hair," I refuse, gazing up at the sky. Its bright blue shade has been replaced by a smokier, more poignant one. A sign it's nearing evening time.

I get reminded of my best friend. "Also, Yeosang's gonna hang out at some diner with me tonight."

"Well, change of plans. You're coming with me today Woo. Plus, Yeosang's probably already asleep," Yunho answers, but before I can argue he's pulling me deeper into the school grounds, and I realize I might as well just do as he asks. My friend can be quite stubborn when it comes to certain matters. (Like the colour of my hair, for some reason).

• • •

Pressed against a spinning chair in the livingroom, Yunho and Mingi staring closely at my form from the couch, I feel no less than a cornered alley cat as Jongho studies the state of my hair with a contemplative look on his face. His gloved fingers stroke his jaw, and I gulp, really hating the fact that I'd forgotten my roommate of last year had dyed the hairs of countless people over the course of our time spent living together in the same dorm.

"After minutes of pondering which hair dye will be most suitable for Wooyoung," Jongho starts as if he's some kind of news anchor, "I have decided to let you guys," - he points at Yunho and Mingi - "choose what dye you'd think would be best."

"So my opinion as the guy who's literally getting his own hair dyed doesn't matter, huh?" I ask. Jongho just pats my head.

"Hush, kid. The adults are speaking."

"You're literally younger than I am-"

"Hush."

"Ooh, I vote electric orange!" Mingi shouts from the couch. "It'll make his eyes pop!"

I can only shudder. "Uh, no way am I getting my hair dyed orange."

"I vote icy blue!" Yunho states, practically beaming in his seat.

"What about fire red?" Mingi adds.

Yunho scrunches his face. "Nah, I think I like icy blue better."

"Nope. Fire red is where it's at, Yun."

"Blue is better."

"Red is."

"Blue."

"Red."

"Bluuueee."

"Reeeeeddd."

"Blue blue blue blue blue - " "Red red red red red red - "

"Enough!" I exclaim. I can't believe my friends, basically sharing the same brain cell. "We'd get nowhere if you guys keep arguing! Yunho" - I point at him - "you want blue, and Mingi" - I point my other hand at him - "you want red." I clap my hands. "Then I'll get my hair dyed purple. Simple as that!"

That shuts them up.

"I approve of this guy's choice right here," Jongho laughs, high fiving me. "But, the question is, what shade of purple?"

Mingi almost jumps out of his seat. "Violet!"

"Lavender!" Yunho exclaims.

"Royal purple!"

"Periwinkle!"

I groan. Here we go again.

"I just want my hair dyed a cute ass purple, okay?!" I interrupt, and everyone becomes silent. That is, until Jongho speaks.

"Your wish is my command."

The dyeing process is tedious, long and overbearing.

Okay, it isn't. It's not that slow, but I'm still a bit irritated at tonight's turn of events. Mingi and Yunho watch with sparkling eyes as Jongho finishes up the process, and I don't understand why they're like that until I see the end result of Jongho's work.

Staring at myself in front of the mirror, I almost don't recognize myself. My brown hair's completely gone, replaced by this soft, charming lilac purple that frames the curves of my face in loose curls. There's ash toned, silver highlights adorning some of the strands, which make the brown in my eyes stand out nicely. They turn almost transparent in the light, buzzing with the magic in them.

"Okay, I admit it. I look awesome. Thanks, Jongho," I grin. Jongho, having already taken off his gloves, high fives me again.

"You look like a baby," Yunho coos from behind me, but I'm into too much of a good mood to retort.

"A sexy baby," Mingi adds.

"Mingi, I would say that I think it's totally creepy that you just called Wooyoung a 'sexy baby', but, I can kind of see what you mean," Jongho answers, and I fight the urge to roll my eyes at my friends' behaviours.

"And, don't forget to add those bonus points for me on the school's website when you head back into your rooms," Jongho reminds us.

"We will," Mingi assures with a smile, and Yunho and I nod along. Those bonus points are what help students gain awards at the end of the year for any sort of help they've been rendering inside the school. And Jongho, resident fruit smashing champion, really likes winning stuff. And since he's a cool, friendly guy, I'm willing to help him out.

"So...how do you feel?" Yunho asks me the second we leave Jongho's dorm.

"Great. I guess."

"Remember what I said earlier today?"

I scoff. "I did."

"Aaaaand...?"

"I feel better with my new hair," I admit, "Are you happy now?"

"Hell yeah." Yunho grins. Then, he laughs, and my lips curve into a smile. And then it drops, 'cause now I'm thinking of San again.

• • •

The third day into the new week, I enter my dorm after a particularly draining Potions lesson, only to realize that there's someone inside the kitchen.

I'm about to react, only to come to a standstill when the person turns around.

"S-San?" I sound as surprised as I feel, staring at the boy in front of me that looks so familiar, yet not at the same time.

"Hey, Wooyoung." San says, and clears his throat. The space between us shortens, and my face breaks out a broad smile. He returns it fully.

"Your - your hair," I start, unable to form a proper sentence. Just him being there fills the entirety of my senses, and I'm lost in his eyes and dimpled smile.

San rubs the back of his neck. "It looks weird, right?"

"No, I -" I quickly shake my head, "Blond looks good on you. Really."

San with sandy blond hair is something I never knew I needed to see. A feeling erupts inside me, one that urges me to stroke through the strands with my fingers. I'm suddenly really glad San can't read my mind.

San smiles, looking a bit relieved. "I...also like your new hair."

My cheeks feel like they're gonna blush. "Thanks. Yeosang says I look like a grape, so it's nice that you think otherwise."

San laughs, and really, I can't help but join him. I'm so damn glad he's back again, even though questions are still splashing over the shore of my mind. For now however, I decide on ignoring them.

Instead, I step closer and hold him in a hug, shocking the both of us. He tenses in my hold, but doesn't move away. I can feel his slow heartbeat against mine, can smell his sweet minty scent, and suddenly this moment feels a whole lot more intimate than I'd originally intended.

"I - You were like, absent for a whole week and a half, so I got, uhm, worried," I let out. San's face is resting on my shoulder, and my whole body heats up like it's being submerged in flames. Yet, I continue to speak. "I like, I wanted to contact you to know what was up, but I - I couldn't."

San stays silent, and I keep talking.

"So yeah. I actually thought at one point that something horrible happened, and I thought that for a while and I just wanted you to be safe. So I'm so glad you are."

San listens to my word vomit, and then he pulls away just to look right at me. His red gaze is kind, displaying fiery warmth that's dissolved of its usual iciness, yet it still bores right into me, and I have to fight the urge to look away.

Fuck, why do his irises have to twinkle in that way?

"I..." San starts, searching for the right words to say. "I'm sorry you got worried about me, Wooyoung. But... I'm better now. I feel better."

I nod, staring at my feet. "I'm glad."

"And I could... I could give you my number if you want, in case something like that happens again. So we can...talk..." San's tone is bordering on awkward once more, but I smile to try and ease the situation.

"Sure!" I beam. "Of course, San."

"And do you like, also wanna come with me to Hongjoong's dorm tonight so we could all hang out? I'm pretty sure he'll be very happy to see you again," I add, hoping with all my heart he'll agree.

"Um, okay," San replies. He looks extremely amused the second I pump my fists in the air and whisper-yell yes over and over again. His nose forms that cute little scrunch while he chuckles. "You're...kind of a weird guy."

I can only laugh at his harmless accusation. "Yep, I know."

• • •

a/n: thoughts?