Mal was at Uma's one Friday night. It has gotten harder being in their co-worker's company every Friday night, so when Uma called it off that day - Mal was grateful. That's how they ended up in Uma's apartment.

It has been more than a week since she had talked with Evie and it felt even more - with them not talking at all. She was avoiding her, or perhaps Mal was avoiding Evie. The blond didn't know where they stood now or will things ever be the same. Perhaps it was too late and she should focus on other things instead dwelling on her feelings toward the other woman.

Yes, feelings. Despite Evie's non-existent ones, Mal has come to terms that she, in fact, has feelings for the brunette. First, she couldn't remember when and how it happened, then when she thought about it - maybe it was there all along. That led her to ask herself if it was obvious? It was to Jay, probably Carlos as well. Did Evie know all this time too?

"So, will you tell me what has crawled up your ass lately?" Uma had asked, handing her a glass of wine? She was too distracted that she didn't even reply when Uma asked her what she would like to drink.

Mal took a sip of her glass and was surprised when it wasn't wine she tasted.

"What is this?"

"Apple cider," Uma replied, taking a sip from her own drink.

"Since when do you drink cider?"

"Since recently,"

"Uh-huh," Mal eyed her.

"Now, stop dodging my questions. You know I have noticed that you have been acting off lately. At first, I thought maybe you are sick with all your morning leaves. Then I thought maybe you are burnout from the work, but now - I can't put my finger on what is going on with you,"

"Harry came to see me a few weeks back," Uma didn't expect such a quick answer.

"Oh,"

"Yeah,"

"Why haven't you told me earlier? What happened?" Uma pushed further.

"He wants us to be friends now. He's engaged," Mal replied, staring blankly at the table in front of them.

"And? Are you ready for that?"

"No, I told him I need more time. He's okay with that,"

"Is that what really bothers you?" Uma inquired then. Mal was answering too easily.

"Not at all,"

"What then? Who's ass I should kick?" Uma chuckled and waited for the blond to look at her.

"I don't know where to start," Mal sighed.

"Then start from somewhere,"

"Do you remember in tenth grade when we went to that party so we can make fun of it?"

Uma nodded not fully understanding where this conversation was going.

"Then when we played spin the bottle and we had to kiss in front of everyone. I was so freaked out after that and it was really hard to talk to you later."

"Yeah, I remember. You avoided me for a while week before I cornered you in the school's bathroom," Uma added.

"Yeah, and then we talked and everything went back to normal after that, it even brought us closer," Mal finished. How she wished it was this simple with Evie.

"Mal, where are you going with this? You won't tell me you are in love with me all these years, would you?" Uma laughed just slightly concerned this is what her friend was implying.

"God, no," Mal chuckled and it felt like this is the first time in weeks that she has laughed.

Silence followed after. Mal not knowing how to pour her thoughts into her best friend after that. She knew that Uma wouldn't push her to talk unless she is ready to do so.

"I kissed Evie," the blond blurred suddenly, startling Uma. Mal realized then that was the first time she has said this out loud to anyone. And suddenly the truth was out and she couldn't stop her mouth from continuing. "I kissed her," she repeated. "She kissed me back and it felt.. liberating."

"Oh my God," Uma murmured taking in the information.

"But then she disappeared and when she was back Harry was there as well and it all felt too complicated all of a sudden. Then when we talked about it, it got so out of hand and now she's avoiding me," Mal finished her drink in one swift motion. Her throat was burning.

"Mal, you know when you and I kissed all these years ago I didn't have feelings for you, nor you for me. This is a different situation," Uma spoke softly.

"Well, it shouldn't be," the shorter woman said in frustration, putting the glass rather forcefully on the table. "She doesn't like me like that. You should have seen her, Uma. Her eyes were ice cold," Mal's eyes finally found hers and that was all Uma needed.

"But, you do have feelings for her, don't you? I still remember that karaoke night, that tension could cut rocks,"

Mal wanted to cry, but there were no tears left anymore. Admitting all that to someone made it even more real.

"What should I do?" Mal asked then so quietly that Uma barely heard her.

"I will tell you something that I should have told you long ago when you asked me this - fight for her. Don't let it slide and pity yourself along the way. Stop waiting around and asking yourself what to do - just do something before you regret you didn't. Don't let her go the way you did with Harry, you didn't try to stop him from leaving."

Mal then told her everything - about Jay's warnings and Evie's words. And even after that, Uma kept telling her to not give up and fight.

-

The next day when Mal woke up she was determined to confront Evie. They hadn't talked in what felt like months and Mal was missing her presence in her daily routine.

It was early afternoon when Mal finally decided what to tell her - and finally found the courage to do so. She walked to their shared balcony and knocked on the glass door of Evie's apartment.

Mal noticed the unknown woman too late, the anxiousness making her act impulsively. The woman was sitting on a chair with her back to Mal so she was limited in what she was seeing.

The woman was wearing a black suit, her dark hair falling in well-formed curls down her back. She didn't bother turning around when Mal knocked on the glass door. The more she looked at her, the more Mal started thinking that this was a mistake. Evie was already there with someone new, continuing her life as if nothing has changed. And nothing has changed for her - only for Mal. The world was crashing around her again. She will always be the one who is hurt in the end.

But then Evie appeared on the other side of the glass, looking at her with big eyes. And Mal knew that there always will be a glass door between them.

"Mal, what are you doing here?" Evie asked after pushing the glass door open.

"I- uh," the blond stuttered. She quickly pushed her miserable thoughts down and remembered that she was here to fight. No matter what. No matter that it might be too late. "I came to talk to you,"

Evie's eyes softened at her words, almost as if she knew everything that Mal wanted to tell her already.

"Mal," Evie sighed, her name rolling off her lips like honey. "I can't talk right now," the brunette added. Her body tensed; the softness in her features turned into anxiousness.

"I know but this is important," Mal could barely feel the determination she had earlier.

"Okay, but I can't right now. Please," Evie's voice turned into a whisper. "Later, alright?"

Mal wasn't left with any other choice so she nodded adding a barely audible "Alright" before the door was shut again and Evie has disappeared out of sight.

Mal lingered there, taking one last look at the woman sitting on the chair. Her eyes lingered on the small hand mirror the woman was holding. Their gazes met for a few seconds on the mirror reflection before it was snapped shut and the blond walked back to her apartment.

-

It was already nighttime when Mal thought that she should talk with Evie tomorrow; or never at all. But then she somehow made it to Evie's living room. Maybe she shouldn't have walked in, but the glass door was opened and she decided to act before she change her mind.

Evie was sitting on the bar plot that separated the kitchen area from the living room. She was drinking wine from a bottle, maybe glasses are overrated? Mal thought she looked younger that way, like a lost teenager at a party.

"Hi," the blond greeted standing in the middle of the room.

"Hey," Evie said back, taking a sip of the bottle. "What are you doing here?"

"You said we can talk later. Now's later," Mal stated making a few steps toward the brunette.

Evie's brown eyes stared at her, slightly dazed from the alcohol. Mal tried holding her gaze but miserably failed when Evie's lips parted and Mal couldn't look at anything else.

"What do you want to talk about?" the taller woman asked after a few seconds, putting the bottle next to her.

"I thought a lot about you and me," Mal said making a few more steps. She waited for her to reply with "I didn't know there was a lot to think about" but she was surprised when Evie muttered:

"And?"

"You said you don't have feelings for me, and that is fine. We can't go back to being friends either. You are trying to push me away. And I told you it is up to me what I do. So I'm acting now, deciding for myself. I'm sure you won't fight me on this one, because I won't let you," Mal was now standing in front of her. Her heart was beating in her ears. This is not what she had in mind earlier, but after seeing that woman in Evie's apartment it was a hard smack that made her realize - Evie hasn't changed. She was like that, being with people without any emotional obligations. So Mal decided that it was better this way instead of losing her at all.

"And what is that?" Evie sighed. Mal was so close to her that she felt the alcohol on her breath.

"This is it," Mal whispered before kissing her. She tasted the wine in her mouth and it felt as intoxicating as Evie not pushing her away, but kissing her back. And it was all Mal needed, Evie wanted her back and for a while, that was enough. It had to be.

So Mal kissed her again and again. And she let her hands wander under Evie's shirt. Evie gasped against her lips before kissing her again until they were both breathless.

Evie slid down from the countertop, her body flush with Mal's. Her mouth attached to Mal's once more, her fingers buried in blond locks.

Mal loved it, it was much more intense than the first time they kissed. All innocence was lost, only wandering hands and curious lips. She gripped the end of Evie's shirt pulling it up.

When the shirt was off, Mal didn't have time to look at Evie's naked torso. In the process, she knocked the wine bottle which spilled all over the countertop and the carpet. Evie attempted to look at the casualties, but the blond didn't let her. Mal kissed her, wrapping hands around her naked waist and pulling her as close as possible.

She wouldn't let anything stop them now. Not one stupid bottle, not if the world was falling apart around them. She didn't know if there would be another opportunity to do this.

And so Mal touched everything she couldn't see and she heard everything she has never heard.

If this was the only way she could have Evie. So be it.