Year 847: Warm Season

"So, any bets on how much longer before Sadies snaps and kills the guy?" Connie asked.

A handful of the cadets had gathered on the deck outside the mess hall, watching as (F/N)'s figure passed by the stables for the third time since dinner.

"Don't be mean, Connie." Mina said.

"I'm not trying to be mean." Connie said defensively. "All I'm saying is the guys not exactly military material, ya know?"

"And you are?" Annie asked coldly.

Reiner placed a strong hand on Connie's shoulder to stop him throwing a fit. "I'll admit, the guy does seem to have a few screws loose..."

"Yeah, a few hundred." Connie muttered.

"...but" Reiner continued, talking over Connie, "that doesn't make him any different from the rest of us. No one who ever witnessed a Titan has ever been quite the same."

"Yeah," Armin nodded his head, "not to mention he said he's from Darmstadt."

"Darmstadt?" Mina asked, resting her chin on the pillow she was hugging.

"It's a small settlement in the west of Wall Maria." Sasha explained. "They were primarily a mining settlement, if I remember."

"Point is, they never received word when Shiganshina fell." Reiner told them. "I didn't think there was anyone from Darmstadt who survived. Word was Titans had eaten devoured most of the town by the time the military arrived. The rest were trapped in the mines due to cave ins from the Titans' footsteps. The order to retreat was given just a few hours later."

"So, you think he's the sole survivor?" Mina asked. "That'd be enough to drive anyone insane. I'm surprised he's as normal as he is."

"Normal?" Connie asked, flabbergasted at the direction the conversation had gone. "The guy eats out of the garbage!"

"It's not like there's really anything wrong with the food." Sasha said sheepishly. "Tasted fine to me."

"Well, you're not exactly 'normal' yourself, potato girl."

"If you're definition of 'normal' is 'the majority', then there are plenty of us here who aren't normal." Annie said, her face expressionless. "Reiner and Bertholdt, Eren and Mikasa, Armin, myself. For us, 'normal' would mean decaying inside a Titan's stomach."

Connie shook his head and stuffed his hands in his pockets. "All right, all right." He said. "All I was tryin' to say is the guy's a little weird, I wasn't trying to start anything."

[Attack on Titan]

Year 848: Rainy Season

Marco wheezed as the air was knocked from his lungs from his back hitting the ground for the third time in just as many minutes. "Ow, dammit." He groaned, rubbing the back of his head. He looked up as a shadow of the man that had just thrown him on his ass blocked out the sun, his hand outstretched. Taking his arm, he was pulled to his feet.

"Go again?" (F/N) asked.

"Nah, I'm good thanks." Marco laughed. "I don't think my pride could take another hit. You've really got a knack for this hand-to-hand stuff."

One of the partners in the pair next to them snorted in amusement. "Oh, please." Jean scoffed. Grabbing the wooden dagger from Marco, he lightly tossed it in the air a couple of times as he confidently approached (F/N). "This type of stuff is all about distance. All you have to do is keep 'em from runnin'." He boasted. "If you keep all up close and personal like, there's nothin' they can do."

Jean's partner, Mina moved to stand beside Marco as Jean dropped into his fighting stance. With a confident smirk, he launched off his back foot and lunged for (F/N) with the dagger. However, instead of backing up and out of range of the dagger like they'd been taught to do, (F/N) rushed in, his left hand swiped the dagger aside while his right immediately shot for Jean's throat. Planting his foot firmly behind Jean's stance, he twisted his body and threw him over his leg. Mina and Marco snickered behind their hands as Jean fell hard on his back.

"Get off of me." Jean tugged his arm away from (F/N) who moved to help him up. "The hell was that?" He asked as he got to his feet. "You're supposed to back away from the knife, not run towards it."

(F/N) shrugged. "I didn't know fights had any rules."

"Idiot, no one in their right mind runs towards a knife!"

"Stop trying to come up with excuses, Jean." Mina said. "You lost fair and square."

"It's not an excuse!" Jean defended. "It's common sense. You create distance and attack the wrist at the tail end of the attack."

"Eh, my way's faster." (F/N) shrugged again.

"Faster? Dumbass, what happens when you get stabbed?"

"It's not an issue so long as the knife stays put." (F/N) replied. "That's why I keep rushing forward. So, you can't pull the blade back out."

"What are you, crazy?" Jean scoffed. "That's never gonna work!"

(F/N) titled his head then lifted the bottom of his shirt above his stomach. Left of his naval, about two inches/five centimeters long was a scar. The wound must have been deep based on the look of it. Marco, Jean, and Mina stared at it in shock as (F/N) considered it for a few moments. "No, I'd say it works." He said plainly, lowering his shirt. "What?" He asked, seeing their expressions.

"Whatever." Jean muttered as he walked away. "Come on, Marco. I'll teach you how to do it the right way."

"Uh, y-yeah, sure." Marco said hesitantly, following Jean.

Whistling, (F/N) twirled the wooden dagger between his fingers like a modern-day drummer would his sticks. He wondered if today would be the day they finally served meat in the mess hall. Based on how the past months had gone, probably not, but he held out hope.

"Um, excuse me."

"Hm?" (F/N) stopped spinning the dagger and turned to see Mina standing next to him, bashfully kicking at the dirt. "What's up, Mina?"

"Well, I was just wondering if you could teach me that move."

"Oh." He said in surprise. "Uh, sure."

They drilled the routine for the next thirty minutes, (F/N) primarily acting as the aggressor so Mina could get the hang of the drill. Every so often they would switch roles so he could correct something. He was just in the middle of reminding her that if she does get stabbed that it's essential to keep the knife in, so she doesn't start bleeding out, when Eren was thrown across the field, skidding to a halt at their feet. Mina slowly approached to see if he was okay, but (F/N) quickly grabbed her and pulled her away as Reiner's large body fell from the sky and landed atop Eren.

"Hey Annie, your technique seems pretty solid." Mikasa strolled up, speaking to the girl who had floored Eren. "Teach me."

The commotion had started to gather a crowd, the other cadets forming a circle around the two girls, eager to see them fight. Marco was the first to back one of them with his confidence, followed by Jean who heatedly opposed him. Meals were wagered over which of the two frightening girls would emerge victorious as they squared up with one another.

"Hey, (F/N)." Sasha walked up beside him. "Why don't you jump in there. I'd put my money on ya."

He smirked. "Yeah, I think I'll pass."

"I think you'd do alright." Mina said with a blush.

"Yeah, come on, (F/N)!" Connie nudged him in the side. "Weren't you just sayin' last night you used to break your own fingers to get out of school? I bet your crazy ass could take 'em."

"Look, I know what you all think of me. And yeah, I've done a bunch of crazy bullshit in my life. But I'm crazy, not stupid." 

[Attack on Titan]

Year 848: Harvest Season

"Hurry up and get your ass in here, Sasha!" Connie hissed as the girl struggled to climb her way in through the window of the boys' barracks.

"Just give me a minute, this isn't as easy as it looks." Sasha retorted.

"Maybe if you didn't pig out all the time, you'd fit a little easier."

"Here, give me you hands." (F/N) said, trying to pull her through.

"Hey!" Jean called from his bunk, poking his head over the side. Connie jumped in surprise and (F/N) lost balance, falling backwards, and pulling Sasha through the window where she fell on top of him. "Again, with this shit?"

"Shut up, Jean!" Connie whispered. "You'll wake the others."

"Please, Bertholdt's the only one who can sleep through the sound of you idiots." Reiner sat up in his bed.

"Shit!" (F/N) hissed as he and Sasha scrambled to their feet. "Back out the window, hurry!" He whispered, pushing on Sasha's back.

"Come on guys, it's not like it's a secret." Eren yawned. "If the three of you are gonna keep sneaking out every night, why not just meet outside?"

"Oh yeah." Sasha said thoughtfully as her top half dangled out the window.

"And next time you two dumpster divers wanna feel each other up, do it somewhere else." Jean said, throwing the covers back over his head.

"Wait, you two what?" Connie asked, turning to look at (F/N) who gently smacked Sasha's bum, eliciting a small 'eep'.

"Right, sorry." (F/N) laughed nervously, pushing Sasha through and stepping one foot out the window. "We'll just duck out."

"For God's sake, just use the door!" Reiner sighed, throwing his pillow at Connie's face.

"Alright." (F/N) whispered as the three crouched together behind the mess hall. "You guys got what I asked for."

"We stashed 'em behind the water barrels like you said." Connie said, moving the heavy wooden cylinders to the side. "What do you need with our bedsheets again?"

"I'll explain later, come on." Still crouched even though guards were only stationed along the perimeter of the boot camp, (F/N) led the other two to the woods nearby. "I was talking to Thomas the other day, and he told me about these traps his family used to set to catch the foxes that were killin' their chickens."

"What's that got to do with our sheets?" Sasha asked.

"Well, I don't have any rope and Sadies is the only one with a key to the supply house. I had to improvise."

"Improvise what?" Connie asked as they ducked into the trees.

"Just give me the damn sheets."

Laying the sheets on the ground, (F/N) folded them in half diagonally and started coiling them up. He then tied the two ends together and fabricated a slip knot about the size of his fist.

"My bedsheet is already up in that tree." He said, pointing to a tall oak. "Climb up there and toss it down."

Nodding, Sasha scurried up the tree and lowered the long piece of fabric, already twisted up.

"Right, so the way this works is once an animal steps on this trap, the bedsheet will tighten around its ankle and that tree branch will act as a pully system and lift the thing into the air. And there's plenty of animals out in these woods. I can already taste it." He drooled. "Rabbits and foxes. I think I even saw a herd of deer out here one time."

"Wait, you're telling me you're trying to catch something with this?" Connie asked disbelievingly. "There's no way that'll work, right Sasha?"

"Oh man," Sasha shivered, her eyes gaining that dangerous glint she got whenever she was hungry, "if this works out (F/N), you can touch me anywhere you like."

"Heh, I'll hold you to that." (F/N) smirked as he finished tying off the bedsheets to the counterweight.

"Aw, gross." Connie gagged. "I'm out of here."

"Whatever man." (F/N) said as he started kicking dirt on top of the trap to hide it. "Just don't expect me to share any of my bounty with you come morning."

The shaved recruit teetered back and forth on his heels, weighing his options. "You're sure this trap works?"

"Pretty sure, yeah." He said. "We could test it if you want. But I used a boulder sitting at the edge of a hill as the counterweight, so I don't know how high it'll take ya."

Giving it some more thought, the boy finally caved. "Alright, fine." He said, throwing his hands in the air. "But if things go south, I'm telling Sadies this was your idea."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever." (F/N) waved his hand dismissively. "Now hurry up and start climbing. We'll hide in the trees, so we don't scare anything away."

Scaling up three different trees, the cadets positioned themselves so they'd have eyes on the snare, eagerly awaiting an unsuspecting critter to fall prey to their trap. But the hours slowly ticked by without so much as a chipmunk skittering nearby. Sasha's insatiable appetite and (F/N)'s... whatever it was, kept the two wide-eyed throughout the night, but Connie's eyes had long since grown heavy. Confident in his friends' abilities to keep watch, he leaned up against the trunk of the tree and closed his eyes. He was asleep within seconds.

Almost no time seemed to pass, but the sun was up by the time he snapped awake at the sound of a sharp 'thwap', followed by (F/N) hissing 'oh, shit.' Before he knew what was happening, Sasha and (F/N) were jumping from branch to branch, quickly making their way back to camp, leaving their successful catch hanging. Rubbing his eyes, Connie poked his head over the large branch he was on. The remaining drowsiness immediately left him as his eyes locked with those of Commandant Sadies, dangling by the ankle.

"Care to explain yourself, Cadet Springer?"

Shit.

Author's Note: Before you ask, no they did not. Second base. Just some consensual groping, nothing more.