[SHADOW]

"Arrgh Shadow, what are you doing?!" Sonic yelped in surprise as I grabbed his neck and squeezed it slightly, the rain still thundering down around us.

"You wanna know how I feel?" I growled at him, tightening my grip.

"Uh- yes!" he choked, gasping for air. I could see he wasn't afraid. We are closely matched in strength. I still wanted to intimidate him though. I can't help it – it's my nature to be domineering.

But I wasn't expecting him to fight back. His next move took me by surprise.

Pushing his chin into his chest, he suddenly grabbed my wrists and yanked them downwards, planting his knee into my stomach with full force.

"Aarghhh!" I cried as my grip on him was broken and I grasped my stomach in pain.

But he didn't stop there. He got me by my shoulders, putting his right foot behind my ankles and pushed me down on my back. I smacked down on the sodden ground, splashing mud everywhere. He proceeded to jump on top of me, pinning me down by my arms, his face just above mine.

"You're still no match for me Shadow!" he said in triumph, a stupid grin on his lips.

"Get off me hedgehog," I growled at him. I was furious that I'd let him catch me off guard like that.

"So tell me Shadow, how'd ya feel about me?"

Rage surged throughout my body.

"Never!!" With that I thrusted my hips upwards and knocked him forwards. He let go of my wrists and put his hands on the ground to stop himself falling flat on his face. With my arms free I grabbed hold of his chest and swung his body round into the mud, soaking him and covering him in muck. I pressed my elbow into his shoulder and with my other arm pushed myself upwards so I now was on top of him.

"Hey!!"

"You had your chance. You think you can mess me around and get away with it?" I growled and put my face close to his, flashing my pointy fangs at him.

All of a sudden, as I looked into his eyes a flash of amnesia ripped through me like the wind blowing away all of my memories. For a second I couldn't remember who I was, who the hedgehog I was sitting on top of was, why we were here or what we were doing.

"Huh?"

Then, in an instant my memory returned like nothing had happened, apart from it felt like I had been slapped around the head.

What was that all about?

"Shadow?" Sonic's wide eyes looked up at me. It was almost hard to be angry with him when confronted with that stupid face of his.

For a moment we lingered in suspense. I could feel my frustration melting away as my heart started taking over from my head. He continued to look at me, waiting for my response. I could feel my lips being pulled to his by some invisible force.

NO! I can't trust him...

Instead of letting myself get carried away, I pulled back, raised my arm and punched him around the face with all of my might. His face scrunched up in pain.

"I despise you." I said coldly and stood up, shaking myself off. I crossed my arms and looked down at him in the dirt. He looked broken. I had hurt him physically and emotionally. He didn't even bother to get up or fight back. He just lay there rubbing his cheek. It felt good to pay him back some of the discomfort he had caused me.

"If that's true," he said finally, looking up at me, "then finish it right here, right now."

"Huh?" I was taken aback by his ultimatum.

"You heard me!" he shouted. "You've secretly always wanted me gone haven't you? So was this your plan all along? To get me to like you so I became weak and then kill me when I least suspected it? Well now's your chance. Here you go Shadow, I'm giving you what you really want."

A tear rolled down his cheek as glared up at me with wild eyes full of rage and sadness...

I shut my eyes and put my head down, letting out a big sigh.

Is that what he thinks?

My resentment dissolved into heartache. It wasn't what I wanted at all. I was hurting, yes, but I didn't want him dead. He has admitted to me now that he likes me.

Maybe I'm being too hard on him. But how do I know if he's being sincere?

Part of me longed to know the reason behind these abnormal visions and dreams. Not to mention what the fuck was that attack of amnesia all about?

There's some effect he has on me when I look into his eyes. It's like something is trying to tell me something. There's a message here that I just can't quite hear. There's more to this than what meets the eye, I know it. There has to be...

"I'm not going to kill you idiot," I said softly.

I surprised both myself and Sonic by what I did next. I reached down to him and held out my hand. He hesitated but took it. I pulled him up off the wet ground.

Another thunderclap tore through the sky. A flash of lightning followed after a few seconds. The time gap between the thunder and lightning was increasing, meaning the storm was passing.

"Let's get out of this fucking rain," I said.

Sonic nodded and followed me inside my den. I noticed him looking around sadly, taking in the sight. The space was almost completely bare now with no furniture or decoration. That still lay broken in a heap outside waiting to be used as firewood. The only things that I had left were some pots, pans and supplies that Knuckles had left me, blankets to sleep in and some that rags that I use for cleaning. I felt embarrassed to have Sonic in my home when I hadn't had the chance to fix it up yet.

I walked to my room and grabbed a couple of the larger rags from the floor. They weren't very fresh but they'd have to do.

"Clean up," I said walking back towards Sonic, throwing one of the rags at him. He glanced at it and sniffed it, then looked back at me, scrunching up his nose in mild disgust.

"Fine then stay covered in mud. Do what you want." I snapped at him, a little offended.

He let out a small snort of laughter through his nose proceeded to wipe the mud and rain off himself. I did the same with the other rag. The silence between us was awkward as hell.

"I suppose I should offer you a drink," I said, hoping a distraction would make me feel less uncomfortable.

"Do you er, have anything here Shadow?" He replied looking around again.

"Knuckles left me some of his shit." I said, silently thanking the echidna, whether he knew or not that his gesture would prove to be so beneficial.

I grabbed a pot and walked back outside to the river. The rain had calmed down and a brilliant blue sky could be seen through the growing cracks in the clouds. The morning air had that fresh, warm scent to it, the one that signals spring is coming. I noticed some of the trees had grown small buds at the tips of their branches.

Sighing deeply I knelt down at the rivers edge to fill up the pot.

What am I going to do now?

I've got Sonic in my house.

He's just confessed his feelings to me but I just don't know if I can believe what he's saying. He says one this and does another. He can't seem to make his mind up... These fucking mixed messages...

But then again, this is different to anything I've ever felt or experienced before. Do I give him a chance?

I'm so confused...

I carried the pot back inside and placed it on the stove to heat up, chucking in a handful of some green tea leaves from Knuckles' stash. I glanced at Sonic. He was watching me and scratching the back of his neck, which I've realised he does when he's nervous.

"Er Shadow," Sonic said with a nervous chuckle, "You know that's not how you make green tea?"

I frowned down at the tea feeling irritated that he was being a know-it-all.

"Tea is tea! I'll make it however I want!" I snapped back at him. We stood in silence once more.

It was a first: Sonic and I being in the same room and not knowing what to say to each other. I was cringing from deep inside at how awkward this was.

Sonic was the first to break the silence.

"So are we gonna talk about this Shadow?"

I tensed up. I wasn't ready to spill my feelings out to him. I stayed silent and looked away.

"Ok how about I start," he voice shook as he spoke and he shuffled his feet nervously.

Here it comes, I thought.

"I was confused at first. I've always looked up to you. You're strong, powerful, you fight for what you believe in, and you've always won. But that night I thought we'd lost you... Well it triggered something in me I didn't know was there. I didn't want to you to be gone. I realised I wanted you here more than anything."

I looked up at him in disbelief. Was this really coming out of his mouth?

"That night I spent next to you on your floor... I just... Wanted to be closer to you. To protect you. To make sure nothing was ever gonna hurt you again. And then... I started getting these waves of attraction and... and desire even..."

His voice trailed off. I could see the sincerity in his face.

My heart started beating faster. I wanted it so badly to be true.

"And then at my house, in the kitchen, like wow Shadow you really took me to another planet."

I blushed profusely and looked at the floor.

He continued, "You really broke apart everything I thought I knew about myself. At first I couldn't face it. I've never even had a real crush on anyone before. And then it turns out to be you of all people! And you seem to like me back am I right? Does that mean you're-"

I looked back at him, my blush fading away. "I am what I am. I live and I love. I choose not to label myself."

I paused and thought for a second.

"Stop thinking for a minute and ask yourself not 'who am I,' but 'what do I like.'"

Sonic gulped and nodded. "I'm just trying to figure it all out," he replied. "Really the answer to that question is you Shadow. It's you."

"I see." I said. "So then why did you deny it to Tails, right in front of my face? And even tried to hide it in front of Knuckles just before. I hate being belittled and if you're embarrassed of me then don't even bother trying to win me over."

Sonic looked ashamed for a moment. "I'm sorry. I just wasn't ready for everyone to know."

"It's not like you to care what other people think!" I mocked him.

"This is different Shadow! I don't care what people think of me because I'm comfortable with myself. Well I was until this happened. Now I don't know who I am anymore..."

I could see tears in his eyes again. This had obviously been pretty hard for him to get his head around.

I sighed. The hedgehog was getting under my skin again.

"So what do you want from this?" I said.

"I don't know, I mean, I'd like to spend more time with you. I'd like to get to know you. See your smile again! It might take some time until I'm ready to share how I feel with the rest of the world but I can share it with you now. Plus I wouldn't mind doing what we did in the kitchen again..." he shot me a cheeky smirk.

I felt slightly aroused and my mind wandered... Could this finally the end to my loneliness?

"How do I know you're not going to let me down? How can I trust you?" I asked him.

"I'll prove it to ya!" he said, his face lighting up. "I promise Shadow. Just give me a chance?"

My mouth was dry and nervous tingles spread throughout my fingers. Was I really going to do this?

I thought for a moment debating on whether I could put myself up for this again. I was terrified of getting hurt. I've endured enough pain for ten whole lifetimes. But being alone is painful in its own way too. Finally my heart won the battle over my head...

"Ok. We can spend more time together. I'll give you one chance at this. And if you mess me around I swear I'll make you pay for it."

Sonic looked like he was about to jump out of his skin with excitement.

"Really?" he said wide-eyed. "Does this mean you like me too Shadow?"

I looked at his annoyingly adorable face.

"Yes Sonic. I like you too." I said.