Chapter 58

The breaking news of Carter's death aired for maybe two minutes. The effect it had on us lasted longer. Not because we were stunned by the loss of a disgusting man we already suspected was dead. My biggest concern was what all of this could mean.

When those words reached my ears, I shook Luke awake so he could witness the news story with me. Little information was given. The body was found among a strip of tall weeds, just yards away from some highway. Stabbed twice through the chest. The news didn't care to give details. The point was he was dead. It was all the ignorant American people needed for closure over what happened in Mississippi. Nothing was mentioned about finding the person who did this. No doubt because whoever did this was a hero in their minds. Of course, you guys know that man is anything but a hero.

Now, the TV screen was black. The dim lamp light was our only source for sight. It highlighted the green in Luke's worried eyes. We were sitting cross-legged, facing each other on the couch. Luke's coat was now off and draped across my lap, hiding my clenched hands under the wool material.

"He's coming back," I whispered, my lips twisting inwards. My scowl was nothing compared to the sick sensation growing in the pit of my stomach.

"Let's not worry about that unless it actually happens."

Did this dude not get the nation-wide memo? I shook my head. "Luke, there is no 'unless.' Jackson obviously has his own plans. Fucking Christ, he hauled Carter's dead body across the country and dumped it. It's only a matter of time until he shows up here."

"Believe it or not, him ditching the body is a good thing," he said, resting his hand against the coat where my leg was under it. "It earned national news coverage. It's demented, but this will help us – specifically since we're starting the search in a few days."

He was right. Carter's corpse showing up across the country would benefit us. Our upcoming search was daunting; I didn't let it get under my skin, but it was scary knowing how close we would be getting to the enemy. However, with Carter's body on the news... it would draw attention. Make the organization think we were in South Carolina and attempt to find us. The less men around the headquarters, the better.

Though it would make our task of searching less daunting, I didn't feel any less on edge. The man who dumped Carter's body was trying to reenter my nightmares. I could already imagine those awful dreams will be starting up again tonight. How convenient. Just when I allow myself to stop dreading Jackson, this happens and awakens all my instinctual paranoia and fears.

Ugh, I needed to suck it up. Seeing Jackson again would be dreadful. But Carter's body being used as bait... could be a game changer and was better than my stupid personal issues with my oh so loving father. "I know, I know it helps," I agreed though a deep breath. "I mean, increasing our chances of succeeding is better than worrying about Jackson showing his face."

"Exactly," he nodded. "It sucks and I can't imagine your anxiety. I... truly can't. But searching for the headquarters is more dangerous than him coming back. Knowing the focus of Reid's men will be on the other side of the country, it makes me feel better. It should give you more confidence too when we start looking. Just remember that."

No matter how scared and angry simply thinking about him returning was, furthering our objective was better. That didn't mean his help was appreciated, wanted, or needed! "Like I said before, we aren't going to allow him to help if we have a choice. He comes back, we refuse him and his stupid help."

"I remember," he said, shifting closer to me until his kneecaps touched mine. He moved his hand from the coat over my lap to brush my cheek. "I'm sorry you have to go through this. I'm willing to help in any way I can."

"Trust me, I'm fine." Removing my clenched hand from under the coat, I rested it on his warm arm. He was right and all I could do was look ahead and remember why this helped us. When it came to Jackson... I just needed to get over it.

Offering me a sweet smile, he said, "You better be fine. You're the strongest one between us."

"You're damn right about that," I said, nudging his leg.

Despite the massive addition of bullshit added to my overwhelmed head, I took satisfaction and confidence from his words. Confidence that would help us search the area without as much fear. My personal issue didn't need to interfere. I needed to be strong and get over it. So what if Jackson shows up? He's not staying. I'll find one of the guns around the house to prove it too.

Yawning and stretching, I allowed my fears and dread to leave my mind for now. Unfortunately, I wasn't sure it would leave my subconscious. "I'm just worried my dreams are going to start up again," I scoffed.

His bushy eyebrows lowered. It casted two small shadows from the dim light, making the glow of his green gaze even brighter. "Is there anything I can do to help?"

A small smirk reached my lips. "I don't know what you can do, but I'm getting some marshmallows."

Getting to my feet, my eyes didn't leave Luke's growing amused ones. "What?"

"I want some damn marshmallows. Is that okay?" I shot back with my growing smirk.

Just because I was stalling from going up to bed, it didn't mean we needed to continue this moping party. The last thing I wanted was more sympathy, especially over something as silly as my dreams coming back.

Catching my light and joking attitude, he slightly shook from his suppressed chuckle. Raising up from the couch with me, he wrapped an arm around my back. Staring down into my eyes with amusement. "Fine, then let's get you your damn marshmallows," he said, guiding us to the kitchen.

Pushing aside the seriousness must have worked. To my surprise, once we had a little snack and headed up to bed, my subconscious didn't ambush me. Falling asleep didn't take hours to achieve and I didn't have any nightmares either.

***

A few days ago, Luke admitted why he began jogging in the first place. It was to get away from seeing me with Chrissy. Apparently though, it made him remember just how much he enjoyed it and found it to be refreshing.

He was anxious to keep the daily ritual going. When we woke up and got moving for the day, Luke started preparing for his jog. Knowing the truth, it did make me happy to see regardless of why he started, the point was he liked it. It energized him to take on the rest of the day – which was needed for what was in store for him when he gets back.

He wouldn't be long, but long enough for me to get the awful deed out of the way. Well... awful to him. It needed to be done. I waited until the last minute so he can't complain. Maybe he thought I even forgot. But nope, as he was about to see, I didn't forget. Call me cruel, but I was excited to surprise him.

"Better hurry back," I said.

Standing before me, ready to walk out the door to my right, I couldn't help but admire him. His tight running shorts and shirt, detailing his body. Then the man's beautiful face....

Wrapping an arm around my back, he pulled me in and kissed my cheek. "What if I don't hurry?"

"I guess you'll see," I said jokingly, hands resting on his chest and craning my neck up.

"Is somebody hinting towards a threat?" Coming to wrap both arms around my back and hold me against him, he lifted a flirty brow.

"Possibly," I smiled.

After our playful banter, he was soon out the door. Luckily for me, there was no rush. It wouldn't take long. Not only did Luke not know I was dying my hair. He also wasn't aware the hair dye I bought was temporary. The blonde would be out after just a few washes, which was better than my original idea of permanent dye. But, he didn't need to know that just yet.

You can't blame me. Knowing how much he loved my hair, I couldn't pass up the chance to surprise him. And hey, I am sure you folks are going to get a kick out of it too. He's just lucky I didn't go with bright green and give him a heart attack.

Then again, green didn't sound bad once I finished dying it blonde. Looking in the mirror after I was done, I forgot how awful it looked. The light color with my already light skin and pale brown eyes... it made me cringe. Hello again, dumb blonde. The one upside at seeing the final product was becoming even more excited for Luke to get back.

When he did... Ooh boy, was it good.

I was sitting at the kitchen table, studying the map of the land displayed in front of me. It was a good way to calm my excitement and prepare for our search. When I heard faint footsteps moving up the porch though... I was already standing. The automatic grin was hard to suppress when I rushed over to the fridge and opened it. It blocked me from his sight when he comes inside. Not to mention, it helped me act as casual as I could, looking through the fridge.

The front door opened feet away to my right outside of the kitchen. The sound and click of the front door closing made me bite my lip. "Hi, sweetie," I heard through Luke's fast breathing.

I turned to my right and shut the fridge door, eliminating the border between me and Luke. All that was between us was the kitchen entrance, which only half covered me since I was directly next to it. Not like it mattered. Glancing to the man, his attention was on untying his shoes. Ugh... the suspense was intense.

Pursing my lips to hold as neutral of a face as I could, I moved to lean my shoulder against the frame of the kitchen entrance. Watching Luke only feet away. "Hey, how was your run?" I asked in as normal of a voice as I could. Staring at his bent body and dipped head, I took him in from his side. A few beads of sweat escaped his brows and crawled down his flushed face. Fingers finished with the laces, he straightened himself and kicked off his shoes. Then, he turned towards me.

Just as he took a step towards me and the kitchen, his eyes reached me and he froze in place. His brows shot up, glazed forehead crinkling in surprise. "You didn't even warn me, woman!" he said through his hard breath, throwing his hands up.

Surprising him was worth those ridiculous words! Laughter busted through my lips. My arms crossed over my stomach instinctively to keep me upright from my shaking amusement. His reaction was too damn good; didn't even warn him?! "I did warn you!"

"Days ago! You didn't give us enough time!"

"Us?" I asked, hands cupping over my mouth as I laughed. Us. Good god, this was a beautiful freaking moment. Luke and my hair... I knew they had a special bond. Didn't realize I needed to worry about being jealous though.

"Yes!" he exclaimed, fighting a smile. Feet in motion, he moved up to where I was standing in the narrow kitchen entrance. He dramatically rested a hand above us on the wall and leaned in close to me. That told you he meant business. "I wanted to savor my time with your hair and you killed it," he said flirtatiously, eyes playfully searching mine.

"You had plenty of time," I said, smiling.

Gaze dancing from my eyes to take in my hair more, he chuckled. "Exactly, I figured you forgot about it and wouldn't do it."

Yep, I knew he assumed I forgot. Smirking and leaning up closer to him, I whispered. "Sounds like that's your fault."

Shaking his head, he ran his hand up through his hair. The motion left it slicked back even more. "I don't know.... Sounds like I need to punish you," he said teasingly.

Well... holy hell yes.

The man suddenly had a point. Guess I'll just have to suffer the consequences. "Oh yeah?" I smiled. A blush ran up through my cheeks. Who would have thought my little joke would lead to this? For how many times I teasingly tell him to punish me, the man was finally taking my advice.

"Yes." A small smirk tilted at the corner of his lips. His sweet gaze was loving yet growing in heat. "What do you think of that?"

What do I think? I understood he wanted to make sure I was on board, but how couldn't I be? Sign me up! Not expecting him to use this as an excuse to get rough with me, I had a hard time not smirking back. We planned on making breakfast after his jog, but this seemed worth prolonging it. A hotdog in the pants is always better than eggs.

"I-I think I was out of line to not warn you before you went on your run. Discipline seems necessary," I nodded.

His smirk grew to a warm smile. He leaned even closer until I could feel his radiating and sweaty body heat. "It is necessary. My beautiful girlfriend needs to learn I'm not a punchline," he said in an intimate voice.

The hairs along my arms stood on end. While he was hot and sweaty from his run, the heat under my skin was building for a different reason. "How are you going to punish me?"

Searching my eyes, he leaned down and closer. Hovering just above my face and his mouth close to mine. The words he whispered against my lips... it made my heart jump unnaturally high.

His low sexy voice was laced with power. "I'm going to take you right here, right now, then you will accompany me to the shower where I will continue to fuck you."

Well... let the vagina ass-whooping commence! Holy hot damn and Satan, this was awesome. I suppose we should just wait until later to tell him it's temporary dye, right guys? Staring up into his beautiful face, not giving a damn about his sweaty state, my body was already reacting. The man always looked sexier after a run. To hear him say that as well and start this, it was hard to contain myself.

Once he leaned back, he then spoke in a more humorous tone. "Afterwards, I'll make us a delicious breakfast, even if I'm full if you get what I mean," he said, sliding his hand down and cupping my mound through my shorts.

Shit yes, I knew what he meant! That bright green in his eyes were filled to the brim in desire and heat. Biting my lip, I wedged my fingers under his shirt and pealed it off over his head. "I think someone saw a couple dogs humping each other while on their jog," I said, dropping his damp shirt on the floor.

Laughing and shaking his head, he wrapped a strong arm around me. "Or despite your blonde hair, you, my sweet lady, cause animalistic urges to take over until I can't stop myself," he said, devouring me in a hot kiss that sent my mind and chest spinning. The need in me rising with his, I gripped him to me. Our hands flew over each other... and it went from there, ladies – and genitals, for obvious reasons.

Luke shoved my back against the wall next to the kitchen entrance. Hands flying to the hem of my shirt, he flung it off over my head. The sensations and the downright raw need was overwhelming. "You want to stick it in me, don't you?" I moaned, gripping him through his compression shorts.

With my shirt off, he was rushing and forcing me to maneuver to get my own shorts off. Leaving me in a bra and... well, there goes my underwear too. Oh fuck, he felt amazing! Kissing me again... and again and again not stopping. Ugh, I was losing it. Gripping his tight shorts and underwear, I dragged them down his legs before he forced me back up to the wall.

"Just like you fucking deserve," he groaned with a chuckle, slamming his sweaty chest back against me. Cupping my cheek and kissing me hard, his other hand made it all possible. He positioned me lower against the wall, then wrapped my leg around him. Guiding his shaft, he... Ugh!

He slid in me, staring into my eyes and watching to see I was okay. When I released a deep moan, he pressed closer and held my thigh around him. Smashing my lips up in his, he started thrusting. Harder and faster. Deeper! My fucking god! Jerking us together with me against the wall. His grunts and my potential shouts were covered and muffled by our strong hasty lips.

From there, it only became more heated and intense. A moment I wouldn't forget between us. We continued thrusting, getting consumed in each other and our vulgar words. Talking dirty and even... doing a few other things.

It was beautiful and dirty and explosive! By the time he dragged me up into the shower, it was a miracle neither of us came yet. Then again, Luke prolonged it until we were upstairs and accessed a condom. No matter how dirty we get, we were smart and safe. I understood why and how it would be easy to forget about protection though. The pleasure that passed between us by the time we climaxed was insane!

The feeling gradually dissipated and the sparks evaporated from our bodies. "Oh my god, you're crazy," I breathed after disconnecting our lips. Staring up into his bright eyes, I couldn't hold back a smile. "Who would have thought a gentleman could get so dirty."

"You're just as wild," he laughed.

The bright bathroom was appreciated. Luke's bare body was one thing; facing him soaking wet in the shower was something else. The water droplets sliding down his face caressed his smooth skin and dampened his longish facial hair. The drops continued down the man's chest, and stomach, strong arms... all of him.

After cleaning ourselves off under the shower, I was craving those strong arms around me again. Pulling him closer from where the streaming water was focused on my back, I wrapped my arms around his neck and shared the warm water with him. His arms wound around my back, fingers grasping me closer.

"We keep this up, my blonde hair will be gone in no time," I said, tilting my head and sending him a dramatic wink.

He raised an eyebrow, massaging circles into my back with his thumbs. "Whys that?"

"Because the dye is temporary and will be out after a few washes," I said, unable to hide my beaming grin.

"What?" he asked, his own smile growing.

"Seeing how deeply you cared for my hair – and as you just proved – I didn't want to put you through that kind of pain," I teased, playing with the tips of his wet hair between my fingers.

"Can't say I'm disappointed," he said, moving a hand up to brush my wet hair back and away from my face, coming to caress the side of my head. "Interesting how you left out that little detail earlier when I was getting upset and needed to punish you."

"Slipped my mind," I smirked, leaning forward and resting my head against his chest. Over the shattering water from the shower head above us, the soft chuckle he released was music to me. It shook his skin under me and enticed me to close my eyes and relax against him.

He laid a kiss against my forehead. "I'm assuming you weren't only thinking of me when you decided to not use permanent hair dye."

"You are assuming right. Changing up the color every couple times we go would keep me effectively in disguise. Plus, it gives me the chance to test out the whole rainbow."

"That's a lot of colors," he chuckled.

Tilting my head up and opening my eyes to his sweet ones, I cupped both his cheeks. "A lot more opportunities you will have to punish me," I responded with a suggestive tone.

"A lot of times you'll need to shower too."

Luke and I proceed to wash up. Using the shampoo while he possessed the soap, all I could do as I scrubbed my hair was smile and watch him. Take in his bright eyes and energy as he lathered his body and rinsed off. I just... couldn't believe it. Believe my luck. I had him as my man.

Putting aside the shock of getting back with him, I was more consumed in a state of wonderment. Today was the perfect day. Just like the past few days were. There was nothing but easy and simple everyday moments. When I was living normal life as Morgan, that same easiness and simplicity was there too. It was a great feeling. However, there was one thing that made a big difference. Under this life, I had Luke. Someone that made me happier than I have ever felt before. A guy that brought the lightest feeling to the surface of my skin. Being with him made me feel all kinds of happy-go-lucky shit.

I could already feel my cheeks heat by the time we rinsed our bodies and were ready to get out. I wanted to tell him something that made my heart jump, something I realized now.

Before we shut the water off, I pulled him back to me. Swallowed with him under the water, I ran my fingers up and around his neck. The rushing water splashed against my skin, but his sweet eyes were clear. His touch just as real when he rested his strong hands on my hips and held me to him.

"I want to tell you something," I said up to him, a massive grin on my face.

His soaked hair draining the drops down his smooth face, his lips spread like mine. White teeth came into view, cheeks catching the water that dripped down him. It was a lovely sensation I felt too. The warm water on my skin and the steam it caused to raise above us. It was nothing compared to the reason my head was spinning like an excited little kid.

"What's that?" he asked.

My heart jumped. We've said some deep crap to each other these past days. Then why was I suddenly feeling reserved? It could be I was about to admit was something I've never said or thought before.

Pressing my chest against his, craning my neck up to meet his eyes, I spoke in a softer voice. "I have never been happier in my life than I have these past days."

Yep, and I wasn't lying. There hasn't been a time before now when I've ever felt free and alive. Even when Luke and I were together before, there was too much chaos. Too much bullshit and a lot happening. Even though we are in the middle of a unique issue, I felt like I was living a normal life with the man of my dreams. Sure, the house was temporary. The identity was temporary. But when you get down to it... we weren't facing death every day. We were living as normal as possible. I was in a relationship with Luke, living with the man in a house. It was the closest I've come to my wish coming true: a normal life where I could be happy with the man I wanted.

I think Luke understood that too. He didn't need clarification. Staring down into my eyes, his hands on my side slide to my bare back. Caressing my skin over the water. I could feel his heart pick up through where his wet chest pressed against mine. "Well then," he breathed, shaking his head. Eyes sparkled under where his hair stuck to his forehead. "Happiness is all I ever wanted for you."

"It's all because of you."

He raised a wet brow, smile turning into a smirk. "You sure didn't make it easy for yourself. Denying me this whole time," he mumbled.

"Asshole," I chuckled. Slipping my hands away from him, I tried backing up from him towards the back of the narrow tub.

He didn't allow it. With a laugh synced with mine, he folded me back against his bare body. Under the rushing water with him, his happy lips dipped down and found mine. Kissing me with sweetness.

Pressed gently against his mouth, I couldn't help but release a muffled chuckle on his lips. Especially after I reached around him and smacked his wet ass, the sound slightly echoing.

"Don't even start," he said, breaking away with a scoff.

After I innocently shrugged, we shut the water off and got out. Moving on with the rest of our day. A normal and perfect day, the type of day that I never wanted to stop coming.

***

My blonde hair laid straight around my shoulders and down my back. The days of wearing my hair in a bun were behind me for the most part. However, the vulnerable sensation that surrounded me did not feel good. It made me want security, safety, made me want to tie my hair up. Even with me looking different – and the device that could detect a structure or disturbance if in range – I didn't feel as safe as I expected to feel.

The magnitude and preparedness of what we were doing hit me during the two-hour drive here. This was it. Everything, all of what we did, was for this. The struggle of crossing the country, of the drama we faced, new identities and lives... all for this. All to find the headquarters. Actively facing the wide landscape, the endless trees that rose in the distance, it was scary.

We were as close to the heart of the enemy as we've been so far. It did not feel good.

Luke and I decided to start searching the southern area of the land first. It worked out too because we wanted our vehicle out of sight. We found a narrow gravel drive into the woods, which stopped at an old and rusted oil well. It looked like we were the first visitors it had in a long time. Weeds shot up among the gravel. The long overhanging branches even brushed against the truck when we first entered.

After slowly managing to turn the truck around in the tight overgrown area, we parked the truck facing out towards the road dozens of yards away. According to our map, which we managed to program into our device, we parked just outside the range of where we were to search. Let me tell you... it was a lot we needed to search too.

From the road we just turned off, we could see endless trees that went for miles and miles. High up and in the distance, thin layers of fog covered the waves of tree tops. Yes... my legs would fall off before my ass gets that far.

At least facing the trees now in such a crowded space, we couldn't see into the wide and daunting forest. All in sight were the numerous massive tree trunks and the gradual uneven ground. I suppose on the bright side... it was bright out. The sunshine fought through the tall nature, shooting rays to the forest floor and highlighting the rich colors. Like the clinging moss along trunks and the rich brown of roots and dirt. The beautiful picture we would be traveling through would offer a nice distraction.

"Ready?" he asked.

Glancing to where he stood beside me, having finished setting up the device, he sent a supportive smile down to me. Which would be a nice distraction (along with the rest of him too). The man's eyes were covered by large rounded sunglasses and his hair was spiked up straight. Those few small things were enough to make him look quite different. It generously allowed me to tease him too.

"You bet, spike," I said, patting his shoulder.

With a small smirk, he turned around to the truck parked behind us. He grabbed the gun I didn't notice he sat on the hood and handed it to me. "I don't know... you seem pretty nervous."

I tried ignoring the heavy weight of it. After all, it's not like we needed a loaded gun. We would be fine. Just to be safe though, I told him I wanted to carry one. I tucked it into the holder strapped to my belt. Then, I folded the hem of my shirt over it. The gun was high enough, my dark blue shirt hid the weapon from sight.

"Hey, I'm just ready for anything," I said, glancing back up to the man. Then, I pointed down to his cargo pants. Earlier, I noticed he slipped his gun into one of the deep pockets when I wasn't looking. "Just like you are," I smirked. Luke... always prepared, yet not wanting me to worry. "Mr. We-Don't-Need-To-Be-Armed." He said we would carry a few guns just to be safe, but we could keep them in our packs. Clearly, I wasn't the only one paranoid.

"You never know when a wild animal is going to leap out of nowhere. We need protection." Readjusting the straps of the backpack he was wearing, he continued more seriously. "I'm excited to do some hiking. I just like to be ready too."

I knew he was just trying to calm my nerves (and maybe his too). But he was right and there really wasn't much we needed to be afraid of. The device would alert us about any opening in the trees within a mile – which would most likely mean a structure. There would be no reason why Reid's men would just be wandering the woods miles from the headquarters. Additionally, and even more impressive, this device had technology advanced enough to pick up large life forms within the same distance. I know, where the fuck did Carter get one of these?

Luke was holding it in his left hand so we could constantly keep an eye on it. With his other hand, he playfully tapped the cap I was wearing. "Shall I lead the way?" he asked in a nonchalant tone. Though his eyes were covered by dark lenses, I knew his flat lips were hiding a smile.

"Why would you need to go first? Because you're the man?"

"Obviously."

He was too fun. With the teasing air and relief, I wasn't as nervous as before. Giving him the finger, I turned and moved from the thin gravel into the trees. "You'll be the one needing protection," I scoffed. Biting my lip, I heard him rush to catch up to me.

It was the first of many times we would come here and search the land. Eliminating what we covered and expanding into what we didn't. It would be a process, but even with our doubts and paranoia, it was the biggest step we needed to take. This was the reason for our struggle. Now, we just needed to make our work worth it. It wouldn't be fitting though if things didn't get fucked up eventually though, right?

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Hey guys! I hope you enjoyed the chapter! Be ready though... things might start getting crazy :P

Also, in the next chapter, I'll show more art work by MadaleneCrisson like I did before. She is awesome!

I don't do dedications and that's a rule of mine. But I'm making an exception this one time. She was a loyal reader who passed away at the beginning of this month. So, this chapter is dedicated to LilMama07