Chapter 56

"That first week or more after we first met, my priority was just trying to handle my life being uprooted. Therefore, for a while, I didn't spare you a second look. I didn't think much of you. I was just trying to form a friendship. The fact that you disgusted me at first did not help," he chuckled. "When you started warming up to me, and when I got over the shock of having a stepdaughter, I... started to notice you more. Appreciate your looks, I suppose. Slowly, over time, every time I saw you, you were more and more... pretty. Like when I saw your hair down for the first time and brushed it out. Eventually I admitted to myself that I found you quite attractive."

We were laying on a blanket in the backyard. Luke had his arms folded behind his head and I was in the same position beside him. Both staring up at the fluffy clouds against a blue canvas. The sky was slowly getting darker with the threat of rain, but we were making our cloud-watching experience last. After hearing what he said, I wouldn't give a shit if it started snowing. His words had me smiling like a lunatic.

"Such a bad boy. Thinking I was hot shit when you were married," I tsked.

He laughed from next to me. "Hey, I... tried justifying it."

"Tried justifying what? Being attracted to your wife's daughter?" I teased, admiring the white shapes of a big flamingo holding a sword.

"Trust me, I felt awful about it. But I tried convincing myself I wasn't a bad person. People can be physically attracted to more than just one person. Still felt guilty, but I could live with it. It wasn't until I actually started to have feelings for you that I fell apart."

I suppressed my feelings for a long time and tried drowning my memories. To fully face them, happy and welcoming, it was beautiful. Even better, these weren't just memories. I was getting a peek behind the scenes. Turning my head towards him, I smiled. "You fell apart when you started having feelings for me."

"You did not make it easy either," he said, glancing to me and playfully poking my side.

"When did you know?"

"It just... happened. We spent more time together and I couldn't get enough of you. Your fun spirit and the way you made me feel. I could be myself with you. During that time, I denied my growing feelings. I was holding onto your insanity and the fact that I was married. Then, it... hit me. I realized I loved you after Clare attacked you in the school locker room."

Beyond my giddiness from having access to his thoughts, it was simply powerful. That point in time, I never knew and always wondered how he felt about me. Obviously, it's clear he did fall for me and wanted me; we eventually gave in to each other. However, to hear his side, when and what was happening in his head, it was a little surreal. I was soaking it in like a sponge with a big smile I couldn't hide.

Taking my mind back to that place, I suppose it made sense. "I'm assuming it's because after she attacked me, you found out the truth by looking at those tapes." That was the one thing that pushed him to my side: seeing evidence of Clare in disguise at my school the day I was attacked.

However, Luke surprised me. Leaning up and on his side, he propped his head up with a bent elbow and hand. He offered a flirty raised brow. "Nope, it was before that, my sweet lady."

"You loved me before you learned I wasn't crazy? I figured it would be when you finally saw I was telling the truth." The show was getting good now, wasn't it folks? Biting my lip from where I was staring up to him, I was completely drawn in and curious.

"Yes." His eyes turned adoring. "I was slowly acknowledging I had feelings for you in the weeks leading up to that day. I just didn't realize I was in love with you until that day. Remember why Clare attacked you?"

"Yeah, you both had a fight." To think that fight had anything to do with his feelings for me, it didn't cross my mind until now. But... wow. Maybe it did help him face his feelings. Recalling what was relayed to me, Luke and Clare had been fighting over how much time he was spending with me.

"She hated how much time I was spending with you. Hearing my wife say that, it made me feel more guilty, sick, and awful. Because not only did I enjoy spending time with you. I enjoyed being with you more than her. And trust me, I already started feeling like a disgusting bastard long before that. So, it did not help my struggle." He reached down to where I was on my back. With the hand that wasn't propping his head, he curled a hair around my ear. "Then, later that day at my parent's house, it hit me. You were hurt and relaxing in bed. When I got there and saw the state you were in, I became restless. My need for you was growing. I was holding onto Clare, my marriage, just clinging, but... I couldn't ignore what you were doing to me. Thinking I was a complete pig, I drank heavily that night. Do you remember that night?"

Oh, did I! Things had been becoming tense between us. Because of our mounting need for each other and because we were sick of me getting abused. However, that was a game changing night. I nodded from where my head rested back on my folded arms.

Luke continued. "I was outside on the deck, drinking, and you showed up. I was sick to my stomach around you. Because honestly, all I wanted to do was kiss you and I hated that." Shaking his head, he offered a small smile. "After I was being an asshole to you, you asked me to look at the surveillance footage from the school. I agreed. Then, I couldn't stop wondering why."

"You couldn't stop wondering why you agreed to look at the security cameras?"

"Yes. And... I figured out why I agreed to do it. My conclusion was I loved you. Deep down, I wanted you. Wanted you more than her. And I could not live with that. So, I wanted proof you were crazy because I... I wanted to save my marriage. I wanted to not love you and that's why I agreed."

To think... he realized he loved me that night. The reason he agreed to check the school's tapes was because he wanted a reason to not love me. Guess it was more than him just slowly questioning Clare's credibility. Staring at the man, I shook my head. "Damn."

He nodded. "Validating you were truly crazy would force me to remain loyal to Clare."

"Talk about a slap in the face," I snorted.

"Yeah, I wasn't ready for that," he scoffed, running a hand up through his hair.

Learning the truth, it broke Luke's heart. He started throwing up outside of the police station when it happened. He was overwhelmed and hurt, but it also reinforced his feelings for me. That was proved days later when he kissed me. But man... I didn't realize he loved me before that. Before he even saw the tapes at the police station.

Swept up in this story, loving that I now knew what he was thinking, his motivations, it was incredible. Hearing this and matching his thoughts to what occurred that day... my god. It made me anxiously prop myself up on my side too and face him closer.

The gentle breeze was slowly picking up and I had to snag some loose strands away from my face. Despite the subject of conversation, our eyes danced in lightness. Luckily, that was all behind us. Staring into those beautiful green eyes, I couldn't help but chuckle. "You know something... I always knew I fell for you first," I said.

The guy's lips widened. His hand crawled closer along the blanket until he snatched my fingers to hold in his. "I'm not sure if I can believe that since you were so reluctant to love me," he said teasingly, but his eyes were calling me out. I completely understood. I was difficult when it came to showing him my feelings.

"Yeah," I nodded. "Took fucking forever to say it, but it doesn't mean I didn't love you long before that."

"You must enlighten me," he chuckled, brushing his thumb over my hand.

"No better time to fall in love than when taking a bath with you," I said, winking.

Raising a brow, he studied me for a moment. Decoding my words and scanning his memory. His grin slowly grew until it was brushing his palm. "Wait. You mean when I was cleaning you after those punks beat you up?"

"Mhmm."

He laughed and pulled me closer with his hand in mine. "No way," he shook his head, white and straight smile making the surprise in his gaze more powerful.

"Yes way!"

Our clasped hands all that separated me from pressing against his chest, I breathed in his sweet scent that the calming breeze enhanced. He shook his head with an amused and gaze. "That was quite early on, Miss. Reluctant."

"I know, I couldn't believe it either. But yes, that's when I first faced I was falling for you."

Moving his head down slowly, he connected his smile to mine. Kissing his sweet and gentle lips, I squeezed his hand in mine. Yeah, you could say our questions were off to a good start. But hell, I would be fine doing this all day. I couldn't get enough of him, of being close to him. I couldn't get enough of knowing he was mine again. Of knowing all we emotionally went through paid off.

"I don't think I ever stopped falling for you. Just keep going deeper," he whispered, laying another kiss.

Causing my insides to swarm again, I scoffed. "That's what she said," I whispered back, leaning up and pecking his gentle lips again.

In response, he leaned back down on the blanket and took me with him. On our backs and staring up at the sky. The only difference was he wrapped his arm around me, holding my side against his. Hells yeah. Of course, while I loved being this close, I was still replaying all he said. It triggered another question. Something I never fully understood.

"When you fell for me, you moved on fairly easily and fast with me. I know it hurt and you did care about your marriage, but you moved on from Clare. Why weren't you able to move on after me?" I always wondered. After his failed relationship with Clare, he moved on. After me, he didn't.

My eyes scanned across the darkening sky. Luckily, the sunlight wasn't drowned out yet and allowed everything to stay bright. Including the rustling tree on our property line to our right that took up a portion of the sky. The clattering leaves had nothing on Luke's green eyes. They searched the flattening clouds as he answered.

"Well, you and her are a little different," he smirked. "Do you remember what I said, not long after we first met? Even before I started having issues with Clare, I told you that the connection we had was very normal. It was love, but it wasn't anything unrealistically magical. However, what I found with you was special and something I never felt before. Sounds corny, but it's true," he chuckled. "Another crucial factor. From the moment I met you, my love for her slowly died. And it hurt that entire time," he said, eyes slowly moving over the sky. Lost in the past, but content with it. It's what made this shit easy to talk about. "It really hurt to drift away from her. You didn't see it, but it ate me up. I didn't want to think about it when with you, but it was painful. By the time I learned the truth about her, I already - in a sense - grieved the loss of the connection I had with Clare. Learning she was a disgusting excuse for a person, whatever feelings I had left for her soon dissipated. Then, on top of that, a big part was the fact I immediately fell for you. Which... I was just as conflicted over, but it filled the void. It helped me. Hating her helped too," he scoffed. "So yes, there were enough things that helped me get over her."

"And don't forget. She was an old bat compared to me, right?" I said, nudging his side. "Officer Prenta wanted some young blood."

He laughed and elbowed me back. "Hey, she at least never kneed me in the crotch or threw punches if she was mad at me."

"Shut up," I mumbled. He was damn lucky he had a feisty woman.

"You shut up."

"Back to the question. You got over her, but not me."

He softly rubbed my side from where his arm was wrapped around me and spoke in a light voice. "When it came to you, things were different. First off, I lost you when I was sure I wanted to spend my life with you. And unlike her, I knew I lost the most special thing my life had ever seen. Not to mention, I couldn't move on. There was no closure. I didn't know what happened to you. When my family pushed for me to meet other women, I couldn't take it seriously."

Hearing him explain it the way he did, it helped me understand. There were so many things different about his experience with Clare and with me. Especially the closure part. If I woke up and Luke was just gone, I can't see myself moving on without having answers or knowing he was okay.

"Well, when you lay it out like that, it makes complete sense," I nodded.

He chuckled. "Now, it's my turn."

Tilting my head and catching his gaze again, I matched his smile. "What's your question?"

"I don't mean to ask such a deep and dark question, but... what color will you be dying your hair next?"

Wow. Such a serious question. "I see your relationship with my hair is still going strong," I chuckled.

"Absolutely."

I missed his teasing and ongoing 'crush' he had on my hair. He always loved my hair. I knew he still did. Like when he asked me not too long ago to start wearing my hair down. It was an intimate and awkward moment because it came out of nowhere. I haven't really worn my hair up in a bun since just for him. So, hearing him ask this... it was more than cute to me.

"Unfortunately, the smart way to go would be blonde."

Although he smiled, his scrunched face gave it away. Considering my words - or trying to find a delicate way to respond - he took a deep breath. "That... would be the... smart way to go."

It was hard to stifle a smile. "Yeah, that's what I was thinking."

"Right... it would be the exact opposite of your black hair. And much different than the dark red color you have now, for sure," he said.

Oh man, this was awesome. Flipping over onto my stomach, I raised myself on my elbows next to him. I raised an eyebrow. "Did you like it when I dyed it blonde before?" I asked, zeroing in on his façade.

"Of course!"

I bit my lip. "Bullshit."

Turning his head towards me, his eyes lit up. "What do you want from me?"

"Nobody likes a kiss ass. I know I am not the only one who found my blonde hair disgusting."

Mouth spreading into a grin, he sighed. "Fine. I hate how your hair looks blonde. Happy?"

"Yes," I chuckled.

This was too funny, plus I strangely found it sweet. "I know you really like how it looks natural, but it needs to go blonde. How upset would you be if I also planned on cutting it?" I asked, ready to cringe and laugh at the same time in preparation for his response. Because while this was amazing to hear, I was serious about the changes.

"It would be devastating," he said, groaning over a nervous laugh.

"Jesus, you sound like a girl," I said, shifting closer until I rested my chin against his chest.

He craned his head to meet my gaze. "You suck. How about now?"

I scoffed, resting my arm across him and running my hand up and down his side. "That's a little better."

He wrapped both his arms around my back. "While I don't know if I can live now..." he started with a teasing smile. "It is the smart choice. I will have to make some changes of my own too. When do you plan on doing it?"

"Maybe tomorrow or in a few days. And don't start crying just yet. I'm going to cut it shorter, but nothing extreme."

The man chuckled and tightened his arms, pulling me up onto his chest until I was laying fully over him. "I'm sorry, I just like your hair dark."

"Well I like expensive and extravagant gifts, you don't see me bitching," I said, laying a delicate kiss against his lips. "Now, my turn."

"May I ask another of mine first?"

"Must be a good one if it can't wait."

"It's... something I still will never be able to understand," he scoffed. "How you are so mentally sound and there? Down to earth and mature. It might sound bad, but it always left me stunned."

I knew exactly what he was talking about. He spoke of his shock over my seemingly healthy mind in the past. It amazed him how I could function, act, and communicate. And it wasn't because he thought I was weak. "Hey, you aren't alone. Based on my abusive history, I should have been extremely fucked up - well, more than I was - and have been unable to handle any relationship," I nodded, smiling down to his amazed eyes.

"Exactly," he chuckled. "When I learned the truth about the abuse, you became... it stunned me. Because it didn't make sense. I already realized I loved you, but once I knew the truth... it became even harder to not pursue you," he admitted with a shy smile. "You literally did not seem possible in my eyes."

"Really?" I smiled.

"Yeah, and I'm not saying that to be flattering. I've never heard of anyone surviving abuse to that degree and still have the capabilities you had. Being in law enforcement, I've seem too many instances of what abuse does to people. It screws them up. For all you went through... you should have had the mentality and maturity of a five-year-old," he shook his head in disbelief, caressing my sides. "No, you... managed to grow and understand the world better than I would have thought possible. Did it damage you, change your thinking? Of course. But... the fact that I fell in love with you, and could connect fully with you, it was unbelievable. Enough so that after three years, I am wondering how you are still so strong. Did it ever... catch up to you in the three years we've been apart? You thought all that pain would cause you to lash out. Or if you didn't, how did you handle everything? An outlet of some kind? I know you said being paranoid and your experiences helped you mature, but I'm curious if there is more to how you have been able to handle everything."

Though he didn't intend it, his claims and curiosity were flattering. My chest against his started moving a little faster. He thought higher of me than I had regarding how I managed my way through life. He was right though. Even though I did drugs, had emotional issues, stole, and didn't give a shit or want to... my mind still was healthy enough to evolve properly. Of course, I didn't think of myself as a weird special case. I guess it was rarer than I thought.

His question was interesting though. Throughout all the shit we faced, I continuously said it would catch up to me. It would bite me in the ass and I eventually would break. That's why I didn't want kids; sometime, my past would catch up to me along with the reality of everything. It was still a worry. But, there were things that helped me. One thing specifically I did not want to admit.

Sighing in defeat, I rested my index finger against his chin. "Well... I suppose I would have eventually told you. But therapy helped."

His eyebrows shot up. "Real therapy?"

Luke always suggested it, and I always hated the idea in the past. After the shit storm with Clare ended though and I was in Witness Protection, I was a mess. I was a mess over so much, mostly Luke. And my therapist helped. "Yes," I mumbled. "The FBI provided a therapist. I also went through a few different programs with them to get help. I always - always said - I didn't need it. Because come on, that shit was not for me. Then, it really did help. Other than that, I can't really say. I still stand by my theory. I was raised under abusive circumstances. That treatment was normal for me. Normal enough that I could be strong. But it didn't warp my thinking because I wasn't cut off from society and people. I still had to function and interact, go to school. Even though I was abused there too, I still had a sense of normalcy and what right and wrong should be. So, of anything, that is probably it."

After I answered, he continued searching my face hovering above his with admiration. "You told me that theory before. I'm starting to think it's more than a theory. Knowing how strong you are, maybe I shouldn't be so surprised. You are a fine woman."

Cupping his cheeks, I bit my smiling lips. "You are a fine woman yourself," I said. Then, more seriously, I whispered, "Who knows what would have happened to me though if you didn't come along."

"I'm happy you didn't have to find out," he said, leaning up and pecking my lips.

"So am I. You make all the difference," I said. "Now, will you allow me to ask my damn question?"

"Yes," he laughed, rolling his eyes.

Studying his gaze, I leaned down until my nose brushed his. In a more intimate tone, I asked. "What side of the bed do I get?" After last night, we obviously were done sleeping in separate rooms. Considering Luke had the master bedroom... do the math.

Running his fingertips up and down behind me, he finally slid them under the fabric of my shirt. He began rubbing small circles into the skin of my back. "If we're in the same bed, I couldn't care less," he said, matching the intimacy in my voice.

"You are going to have to make some space in your room too. I'm moving in," I smiled. Being with him, it's not like we needed to work towards the next step. We were already living together. The best we can do is share a room. Which wasn't just overly exciting, but it would be easy. It's not like I have much to move.

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah," I said, stroking his cheeks. I was nearly tempted to run inside and get to work. With how much I was looking forward to this relationship, sharing a room symbolized a lot. It would reflect the start of moving forward together (yeah yeah, I know how I sound).

Mother nature apparently liked the idea of getting straight to work. Staring down into his eyes, his face and our surroundings started to darken. Glancing up to the sky over my shoulder, the fluffy clouds were almost fully gone. Damn whether. Any moment, it would start to pour down on us. I could even feel a wet droplet hit me every few seconds.

I glanced back down to him. "Unless you want to make out in the rain and completely turn me on, we should probably head inside," I teased.

"I'm always happily prepared to turn you on," he smirked with a husky voice. As my heart jumped at his unexpected words, he intensified it when he leaned up and swept me into a deep and heated kiss. Moving his hands down the skin of my back, he teased me by just barely slipping his fingers under the hem of my pants. It was enticing my insides to tremble, even more as I moved my lips in sync. With him causing my bouncing heart, it reminded me how this will take a while to get used to. Not like that was a bad thing.

Breaking away, blushing, I spoke in amazement. "Dude, you just say the word, I'll whip my vagina out."

Laughing, he withdrew his hands and moved them up to caress my head and neck. "I'll remember that. But if that's going to happen, we should maybe go inside."

He was damn right about that. Even though the breeze calmed, the air was growing colder and it was already beginning to sprinkle. "I can't complain," I chuckled.

Regardless of what happens when we get inside - and you guys probably have a good guess - we wanted out of the rain. By the time we got to our feet and folded the blanket, the rain began picking up. Not like it would have mattered all that much anyway. Because hell, even if we did stay outside, this was already one of the best days I could remember.

Though it turned into a rainy day, it didn't matter one bit to us. After we got inside, and had our little break between the sheets, the rest of the day was spent talking. Laying around, talking, and staying as close to each other as possible. I understand it's 'new relationship fever' and all, but it was damn amazing.

We flirted, joked around, learned more about each other. Questions turned easily into conversations that carried numerous subjects. Many were enlightening curiosities about each other. Most were silly and random. At one point, I forced him to arm wrestle me. Don't listen to what he says; I won. The point is, it was an amazing day of doing whatever and relaxing with each other. For all the fantasies I had of being back with Luke, today was better than I imagined it could be.

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Hey guys! So a few things....

I hope you enjoyed the chapter! I know its a bit short and I'm sorry, but it's been pretty busy. Today was the last day of school so hopefully I will be able to update much faster!

There is a very talented and kind person who made me some fan art and alternative covers! You will see some attached in upcoming chapters. This woman is talented! She is here on Wattpad and you can find her as MadaleneCrisson. You should check her out and the book covers she made for herself. She is willing to make a cover for anyone who needs one too. So if you are interested, I would definitely contact her! She is AMAZING!

And finally... if this chapter sucked, here is a side story:

Once upon a time, JadedViolet was writing Chapter 56 of Isolated in her room. She was tired and loves her fans so much that she was working to post that night! Then, as she is sitting on her bed and writing away, she sees at least a dozen little annoying bugs in her room. Dumbass JadedViolet had too many lights on and forgot the screen on her window has holes. She thinks she kills them all after a good half hour and after shutting the window. So she gets back to work. Unfortunately, she had to shut her fan off and its getting very hot in her room. It's hot and a dozen more bugs show up. At this point, she feels gross and plans on sleeping elsewhere for the night. But does that mean she doesn't update? No sir. She is determined. So, she shuts all her lights off and leaves her bedroom to work out in the living room while everyone else is sleeping. Half way down the hall with her computer, a massive bug flies into her mouth and she could even hear it. She is jumping and flipping out and spits the thing out. And she keeps spitting and making all the noises one would make. JadedViolet was flipping her shit. She turns on the light and she sees it on the ground. Much bigger than the small ones in her room. Beyond grossed out, she gets rid of the bug. Then, thoroughly washes out her mouth. Does she go in the shower like she so desperately wants? No. She goes to the only safe place to finish her chapter: the bathroom. Isolated Chapter 56 was finished in the bathroom because JadedViolet wanted her chapter posted that night. JadedViolet did just that and posted it from the bathroom. The end!