Chapter 44

House sweet house. Not home sweet home. Because guess what, it's not my home.

I took pleasure in knowing this wasn't my home. Otherwise, this two-story relief from motels would be daunting. It was hard enough to be standing before it, realizing this was real and happening. So, knowing we were renting and this was temporary was nice. It gave me hope that this mess will be over soon. Of course, that doesn't mean I won't take advantage of living under cover here. We needed a break. I needed one.

Staring up at the house from the driveway, Luke and I leaned against the grey truck we rented. That's right. For all the vehicles we cycled through on this trip, our standards grew. Peggy and Kyle wouldn't have anything but the best. Or rather the stolen red car associated with a mass murder was something we didn't need to be seen in.

"It's more impressive than the pictures showed," Luke said from beside me. Glancing up to him, his eyes moved over the house with admiration. The bruise on his cheek was darker, but it matched with the blue gloomy sky. Apparently, that was something we need to get used to here in Washington.

The house at least stood out. It was surrounded with white siding. The front door was accompanied with a long wooden porch. There were a few other tasteful interruptions of the siding. Below the two identical windows along the second floor, the roof jutted out and continued for a few feet. The long brown slant under the windows reminded me of our old house in Ohio. The only difference was it offered the long porch some protection. Including the door, the white porch swing, and the bay window to the right of it. Attached to the far left of the house was the garage. There was no mystery about that though. We already saw what was behind that garage door.

We arrived to this town, Virron, a few hours ago. However, there were some things we had to do before coming to the new house. That included some paperwork and dropping Carter off at his trailer until later. But there was a major issue we needed to address. And that was fixing the car problem.

We didn't feel right abandoning the car anywhere. What if the cops find it? It would get on the news and Reid's guys would see that Luke and I are at least in Washington. That's why after we rented the truck, Luke and I drove up to this house separately. From the truck, I immediately opened the garage door with the clicker Bill gave us. Then, Luke zipped into the garage with the red car. We just as quickly shut it from sight. It's not like we were worried; just being safe. I highly doubted our neighbors were spying on us.

Even if they were spying, they would have a hard time. Our neighbors were maybe half an acre away on both sides. Thankfully, between that small space, there were plenty of trees and brush. It created a high fence between every house on the street. Those trees were small compared to the two big pines in our front yard. That was one thing I couldn't get over yet. The absolute beauty.

When we reached Washington and I woke up my long rest, there was a clear difference. The trees were massive, the overcast sky tinting them a dark color. The ground they were rooted in was unpredictable. There were many hills and mountainous regions, many showing jagged rocks covered in foliage. Especially around here. Across the small street from our house, the ground was hilly. It offered no support for any structures. It shot up towards the sky every few yards, supporting beautiful green giants. High in the distance, the tree tops lived in a soft misty fog.

"Do you think someone died in this house at some point?" I asked. "Maybe this place is haunted."

His soft chuckle under his breath drew my eyes back to him. "I don't know, but I doubt it. The house isn't that old."

"You never know. Look at how big these trees are. Wind picks up... tree falls over. Then bam. Ceiling caves in and you die while taking a shit."

Running a hand back through his hair, his lips settled into an amused smile. "That is a good point. This house including the roof does look renovated..." he teased.

"Well you know what, I'd take ghosts over neighbors. I bet it's only a matter of time until they come rushing over to introduce themselves. Hopefully when they do, they will have a 'welcome to the neighborhood' gift. Like pie."

"What, you think they will be nosy?" he asked, a soft smile still on his lips. It was a nice sight. Especially because I knew how uneasy he was about coming here; who knows how long we will be here without contact with his family.

I scoffed, glancing to our left where the neighboring house was blocked by trees. "I don't know, but it will be interesting. From where we just ate dinner, this seems like a very friendly place with nice people." I frowned. "This could suck ass."

"Stop," he chuckled. "What is so wrong with friendly?"

"Friendly means socializing. Waste of my time, man. Plus, we would need to put in extra effort since we will be putting on an act."

He pursed his lips, looking down. "Yeah, that's... going to be rough and demanding," he mumbled. His smile returned a quick second later before I could analyze his words. "Are you ready to head inside? Check the place out?"

Nodding, I glanced towards the house. What did it look like? It was fully furnished, but with what? Where will I be sleeping? Luke retrieved the house key from a container holding most of our valuable information. Then, we walked up to the house and through the door.

Standing in the foyer, the muskiness of an unoccupied house hit my nose. Besides that, there was a lot to take in. A few feet in front me and to my left was a staircase that hugged the wall. Slick dark wood floors hugged the steps as well as the rest of the floor. Except for the kitchen to my right. It had an entryway as wide as a door. All I could see was the floor tile and a fraction of the dark countertop. As for a few yards in front of me, the foyer opened into the living room.

Slowly moving forward, I took in the wide area. The back of a dark green cloth couch was the first thing I saw. It was placed in the middle of the room and facing away from the entrance. A wooden console table accompanied it, fixed along the back of the couch. The high narrow table surface was nearly even with the back of the couch. It supported a few knickknacks. Like a small wood carving of a bear, a basket of fake flowers, and two tall candles on both ends.

Rounding the couch, I took in the rest of the room in. Adjacent to the couch was a matching loveseat. Both were arranged around a wooden coffee table. Under it all sat a massive tan rug, delicate designs sewn along the edges. The furniture also faced a flat screen TV. It was sitting on a stand along the back wall across from me. It shared the wall with a sliding glass door a few feet to its left. Cozy and soft brown curtains were hung from it, pushed aside and allowing dim gloomy light in. There was also a hallway dividing the right wall of the living room. I had a good guess that the bathroom was down that way.

Looking that way, my gaze caught Luke. He flicked a switch along the wall. The ceiling light turned on. "What do you think?" he asked.

I did a once-over again of the room. I was pleased for the most part. It wasn't a dump like I half expected. To mark our territory though, we needed to add a few things. "There's nothing on the walls. And even worse, the walls are plain white. We should change that. I'm thinking bright piss yellow," I smirked.

"Piss yellow?"

"Yeah."

"I don't think so," he shook his head, scoffing. His eyes started focusing more on me, searching my face. In worry or confusion, I wasn't sure.

"Fine. Then when we go shopping, we are finding some cool shit to hang on these walls. Besides that, I think it's very nice. It's comfy."

"Right, it feels homey." He nodded in agreement, still studying me. "I'm hoping the upstairs is the same."

Surprisingly, it was. The upstairs was all short white carpet, stretching along the hall. There were two bedrooms across from each other a few feet from the top of the stairs. A bathroom as well was further down.

The carpet and rooms were not the first thing I noticed though. When I reached the top, I froze on the last step. It forced Luke to pause behind me. My eyes locked on what was staring at me at the end of the hall.

I spun around. "Fuck this, man. Let's trade with Carter. I'll take the trash trailer."

"What is it?" His brows shot up in curiosity. A step above him, we were at eyelevel.

"I'm not living in a house with that," I laughed, jutting a finger behind me where the massive beast was staring at us.

Scrunching his eyebrows in confusion, he looked beyond me. Face going smooth, he looked back to me. "I'm guessing you are talking about the moose?"

"Yeah I'm talking about the fucking moose! Jesus Christ!"

While he tried containing it, it was hard for him to stifle laughter. "It's just a mounted moose. Not something I pictured. Not my taste either. But I don't think it will hurt us."

"Dude, I don't care. I don't want to see this where I'm living," I chuckled.

His sweet smile and laugh aimed down to me was beautiful. But do you think that means I'm going to live down the hall from a moose? I don't think so. Animal mounts didn't scare me. When I was a waitress, I saw them every day. Deer, elk, whatever, were hung on the restaurant walls. It's no big deal. But would you like a moose staring at you while you are trying to live your life? Would you like it watching you when you get up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom? Judging you because it can hear how big of a shit you took? I don't think so.

He arched an amused brow. "You scared of it?"

"No, it's dead. But it's still on the wall watching you."

"If you aren't scared, why are you still facing me?"

"Jeez," I laughed, moving up the last step. I walked to the end of the hall. Though it was dark up here, the glint in its glazed eyes was evident. The huge antlers and head attached to the wall became daunting. I looked back towards Luke. He stood where I left him, smiling sweetly. "See? I'm not scared. Now get your ass over here," I said

He looked slightly confused – even concerned – at my outgoing demonstration. When he reached me and the moose though, I gave him specific instructions. "Look into its eyes." He did. "Now... imagine being watched. By these eyes. Are you comfortable with that? Does it get you hard?"

"No," he laughed, chest and shoulders jolting in humor. "Fine, I'll take it down. Happy?"

This moment wasn't about the moose. Don't get me wrong; moosey needed to come down. Making a big deal about it though, it wasn't because I was a drama queen. It just felt good. To laugh, focus on something irrelevant, and forget everything else. Thinking and saying anything not serious... it was a breather.

Unfortunately, the free feeling didn't last.

After we claimed our rooms, checked out the rest of the house, we brought all our things inside. It was unpacking time. And I could already feel my joking defenses growing weak. With Luke unloading his own things and getting settled, I didn't have anyone on the other end of my stupid remarks. I had myself and my painful luggage.

Standing at the end of my queen bed, I stared down at the bag I lived out of since we got on the road. It was the clothes I struggled to find a washing machine for at the motels. The clothes I always wore. Along with that, there was my other small bag filled with toiletries. My brush, make-up, toothbrush.... These were the things I saw each day. But after I unpacked those and threw the now empty bags onto the floor, I hauled my suitcase on the bed.

For a long moment, I just stared down at it. I rarely opened it before because necessities weren't in it. However, more important things were. And the last thing I wanted right now were painful reminders.

Sighing, I unzipped it and started to pull out folded irrelevant clothes. My heart was already racing before I saw the first gut-retching item. But when I did... it hit me harder than I expected. After lifting a camisole out, a plastic bag was revealed. It held Jack's collar.

The sight of my little buddy came back to me. The shadow of his sprawled out body on my bed had first made me assume he was laying down. The unfortunate truth came when I flicked the light on. Jack's lifeless beady eyes without life. Limbs spread unnaturally. Blood everywhere from deep cuts. I miss you buddy.

"Fuck," I groaned, taking a deep breath with my thickening throat. I took it out of the baggie, running my finger over it. I could hardly handle it. Sucking it up, I put the collar back in the baggie and moved on.

It was making me uncomfortable. My irritation was growing. All these clothes... reminded me too much of my home in Connecticut. A home that apparently was supposed to be my home forever. I hated that. I hated even more how quickly I was forced to leave.

That feeling intensified when I reached Luke's coat. Sinking my teeth into my lip, I sat down on the bed. Dragging the coat into my lap, I stared down at it. Immense amounts of... love and loss crossed me at the sight of this coat. It was the coat Luke wore in many of my memories of him. With him. I wrapped my arms around him when he was in this coat. Held him and kissed him.

This was also the coat I wrapped my own body in. When I missed him, when I needed him, when I needed to feel him close. Smell him. This coat was painful and sweet. It could either calm me down or make me break down. It's not like Jackson ever cared about that. He wanted me as far away from him as possible. He wanted Luke gone. Because he is a selfish fucking bastard! One I wanted dead!

And if he hadn't rushed me out of the house, I could have taken more. These things... they were all I had. My furniture, the rest of my clothes, everything I owned was across the country. It was in a home I was supposed to be bound to for life. Because of my fucking father! I wanted my things. I wanted more than this. I wanted the things I took from Ohio to Connecticut. I wanted the bows that Luke gave me. I wanted the dinosaur he won me. I had been able to bring those things to Morgan's life. But that is as far as they went. Jackson rushed me out before I could grab more because we were being hunted.

I wanted my things, I wanted my things, I want my fucking things! I want my bows! I want Luke! And guess who didn't want that for me? Jackson! Oops, nope! I mean fucking dad! Jesus. I buried my nose into the coat. It was all I could stand. Falling back into the pit of the previous night, I stood up. At least I came prepared. The big pack of cheap beer was the only thing in the fridge. It was the only thing I needed.

I delicately laid Luke's coat back into the suitcase. Flinging open the door, I immediately spotted Luke in the room across from mine. His side faced me from where he was attending to the dresser. I watched him for a long second. He folded his clothes and laid them in an open drawer. The man was enticing. How nice would it be to just go up to him and kiss him? Jesus, fuck me. Well, a girl can only wish...

I rolled my eyes at myself and stormed downstairs. I needed out. Out of my stupid head. Escaping in humor or talking was pointless now. And throwing bread at people wasn't an option.

Marching into the kitchen, I snagged the whole unopened pack of beer. As I turned with the heavy case straining against my fingers, Luke was standing a foot away in the kitchen doorway. This time, his worry was intensified. Those sweet eyes stopped on the big case of beer.

"You alright?" he asked slowly.

"Eventually. Like always."

"If there is anything--"

"Anything you can do?" I considered it. "Unless you can haul all my possessions across the country, I don't think so. I have no idea what even happened to everything in my house! And I doubt you can deliver Jackson to me on a bloody platter. So, I'm going to drink," I said, raising the case with a tight smile. "Would you like to get drunk with me?"

He sighed, shaking his head.

"What? You want to watch over me while I irresponsibly drink?" I scoffed.

"Yes," he nodded instantly, eyebrows dipping more in distress and irritation.

Hearing that made me want to run upstairs and grab his coat, wrap it around me. He didn't need to care so much about me. All it did was give me another reason to drink besides Jackson.

Before I could get to my beer party, a knock came from the front door behind Luke. When Luke walked the few feet and opened it, a man stood there. He had brown hair and, thanks to the contacts, brownish hazel eyes. He also wore a grey ballcap we picked up just outside of town. After all, even though 'Trent' was playing the drunk incapable brother, he still needed to show his face sometimes.

"Hello," he grinned. Even though I knew it was mocking, his smile was friendly and sweet. It was foreign on his face. "I heard this street earned itself a few new occupants. My name is Trent Doyle," he said, voice higher. "I thought I would stop by and welcome you to the neighborhood."

Sighing, I set the heavy case on the floor and walked over to the two men. Getting a better look at Carter, I had to give him credit. For a guy whose face is strung across news stations, he did a good job with his appearance. Even more interesting was his sudden voice change and his acting skills.

Luke thought so too. He nodded to him in approval and let him inside. "For how good that was, you might want to remember your backstory," he said, shutting the door.

Carter looked around him, taking everything in with critical eyes. "Just because I can be charming doesn't mean I'm not a lazy drunk. Many deadbeat drunks are charming. So, more importantly, you might want to remember we are one brother short," he said, looking between Luke and I on either side of him. "Dear brother Kyle will be expected to come by and check up on me. Or, if you don't mind, I would prefer visits from Peggy instead." He rested his contact brown eyes on me. They couldn't hide the teasing glint I was sick of.

"I'm surprised you're even staying in that trailer," I mumbled. Carter said it himself. Jackson could keep his promise, show up, and kill him since he knows exactly where we are living.

"I'm staying there for tonight only. I'm not worried. I'll find another place to stay."

"By tomorrow?" I asked.

Carter nodded, smirking. "What? Don't have faith in me? All it will take is finding a new place. Like an apartment. My information and new address won't be fully updated for Jackson to find."

Luke cut in. "Do what you want. You just cannot be recognized. That matters most."

"Copper, calm your shit," he groaned. "Out of every one of us, I am the one who has the most to lose if that happens. I'm going to stay low. Even when I get a new place."

I didn't really care at this point. Whatever floats his boat. If he wasn't staying here, that is what mattered. Checking up on him will be hard enough to deal with. Of course, it was clear he might be a regular visitor here. He continued looking around, admiring the house.

"Well, this house—" Before he could state his opinion, his gaze stopped towards the kitchen. The case of beer was in sight. "I see someone is about to have a party."

"That's the only thing we're solid on," I mumbled. Moving closer, I rested a firm hand on his shoulder and guided him back towards the door.

"What?" he laughed, looking down at me with excitement I couldn't bear. It brought back everything he told me about. "Why can't I have some fun too? I am the drunk in the family. Wouldn't it make sense to let me drink with you?"

"Nope," I snapped, opening the door for him and pushing him towards it. "We'll come by tomorrow."

"Peggy, come on. Just admit you don't want me interrupting hanky-panky time."

It took another minute until he left, laughing his ass off. I could see in his gloating eyes that he took pride in seeing what the truth was resulting in. I didn't care. Carter could not make me feel shame because of the disgusting piece of shit he is. Not to mention, he was the family drunk, not me. Who was he to talk.

"Alright," I muttered, grabbing the case of beer and heading into the living room. When I sat down on the couch, Luke slowly followed and sat on the adjacent loveseat. "Let's find something good on," I said. I turned on the TV, dragged the case I set on the floor closer, ripped it open, and grabbed a can. I opened it as I flipped through the channels.

***

For the first night in a house with my own room, you'd think I would end up sleeping in my bed. Yet, where do I wake up? When I managed to open my eyes to the blinding light before shutting them, it was enough to make me realize I slept on the fucking couch.

That was the last thing I cared about. Squeezing my eyes shut, I grabbed the pillow under me and put it over my face. It didn't help my pounding head. Especially when I became more conscious and attempted to remember why I was on the couch. Besides the obvious, dumb asses. I know I got drunk.

Besides that, there wasn't much I could recall. How did I end up sleeping here? What happened? I was drinking, watching TV with Luke... then what? Well, there was at least one thing I could say with certainty. TV didn't keep my attention. With each beer can I drained into my system, things became hazy. I managed to remember a few fuzzy moments though.

What did I do again...? I remember shouting random shit, talking to Luke. But there was more. What was it? Oh great, that's right. After enough drinks, I got up and started dancing like an idiot. Thank god I wasn't able to see myself. Unfortunately, Luke wasn't as lucky. God, I must have looked like a fucking moron. It's been so long since I got full-blown wasted. But from all my drunk moments in the past, I never got up and danced. Then again, I don't know if I ever got as drunk as I did last night.

What else happened? Ugh, I wasn't sure. Well, there was at least one plus from not remembering: Luke. I was glad I couldn't remember his reaction to my intoxicated state. Imagination alone was enough for me to picture his disappointment. I'm sure he did not have a fun time watching me drink.

Jesus, how embarrassing. Luke didn't deserve my shit. I would have to apologize today. Today as in later though.

Yes, later. No more thinking. Hugging the pillow over my head, the darkness and soft state I was in helped me slowly ease back towards sleep. My pounding head welcomed slipping back into nothingness. It felt great. However, I was unable to fully go back to sleep. A loud and annoying zing hit my ears and echoed.

Moaning, I held the pillow tighter. What was that? Thanks to the ringing noise vibrating through my ears that didn't seem to stop, I realized it was the doorbell. The damn doorbell. It was the worst sound because it tempted action. Maybe it was just Carter. Right? What if it wasn't though? Goddamn it!

Struggling to my feet, I instantly froze in place with a groan. Heaviness flooded my body at the sudden movement. I felt like absolute shit. Literally. Like I just got shot out of an asshole going 90 miles per hour. I wasn't use to standing, my head hurt, my eyes stung from the blinding daylight.

Squinting my eyes through narrow slits, I made my way to the door. And when I opened the door... fuck! The light was ten times worse. I didn't even have a chance to take in whoever stood before me. Hand flying up to shield my eyes, I grunted. Peggy was no bitch though.

I spoke to the invisible stranger. "Hello?"

"Good morning," a woman said in a worried voice. "My name is Grace; I live three houses down. I... thought I would welcome you to the neighborhood! I'm sorry if I woke you; I can come back later if you would like."

I dropped my hand and fought through the light. The woman was slightly taller than me, but quite slim compared to me. Wearing a peach polo shirt and jeans. Dark brown hair cut to her shoulders, she had a round face with a tanned complexion. The wrinkles around her concerned half smile and neck told me she was around her early 40s. She had big lips too. Maybe she was the neighborhood blowjob whore.

"Hi," I said, clearing my voice. Not wanting to give the neighbors the impression that I was a bitch, I offered a smile and outstretched my hand. "And don't worry about it, it's okay. I needed to get up anyway. My name is... Peggy," I forced through a suddenly tight mouth. I hated it, hated that name. It burned leaving my lips.

The woman, Grace, leaned forward with a bigger smile and shook my hand. "It's nice to meet you. My husband drove home from work last night and told me he saw your truck in the driveway. I just had to come by and say hello to the new renters."

Her smile was nice and casual. It helped my painful head from overthinking the act I was putting on as Peggy. "I really appreciate that," I nodded. "We just got here last night. It's a nice town. I like it so far. And the area is so beautiful. You guys must get tons of tourism around here," I said. The woman wouldn't leave without conversation. Might as well learn a few things about this place if I could.

"We do, but it's not noticeable. There are more beautiful places than just this town. It's like this all over the state." She paused. "I don't mean to pry, but you aren't from around here are you?" she asked, voice offering respect.

It was a good thing I was solid with our backstory – and an angel to not scream at her for interrupting my sleep. "No. Came all this way from Indiana. It was a long trip," I chuckled. "But it will be worth it. My—"

I was about to jump into the reason why we moved. Then, footsteps coming down the steps made me pause. Turning around, I took in Luke in a baggy shirt and shorts. His nervous eyes were steady on me.

There was no wondering why. His stress didn't need an explanation. After all, he recognized that this was the first instance of personally communicating with someone. Not only was there reason to be nervous about keeping up our story, but I'm sure my acting like a lunatic last night didn't help his confidence in me.

Before he reached the bottom of the steps, Luke took a distressed deep breath and swallowed hard. The next second, it was all gone. Nearing me and in view of the woman, he wiped all signs of a conflicted Luke from his face. He replaced it with Kyle.

A polite smile reached his lips as well as a curious brow. Coming closer, I was surprised by the nonexistence distance he created between us. Standing beside me now at the door, he pressed his side into mine. If that didn't trigger my cheeks to flush, his arm that came to wrap around me did. It's not like I could show any sign of surprise. This was who Peggy and Kyle were.

Smiling, I craned my neck up and took in his welcoming expression aimed at the woman. "I'm guessing we are meeting a nice neighborhood greeter?" he asked, glancing down to me.

"You are," I said. "This is Grace. She lives a few doors down." Glancing back to her, I gestured to the man with his arm around me. "Grace, this is my boyfriend, Kyle."

Before she could respond, Luke offered her his free right hand. "It's so nice to meet you. I'm sorry we aren't in the most presentable state. We had a long night." Luke stepped back and turned, arm still around me. He swept his free hand towards the interior. "Would you like to come in? We don't have coffee, but we can offer water," he said, blushing. "We have a lot of shopping to get done."

She raised her hands with a sweet smile. "No, that's nice of you, but I won't be able to stay too long. And I understand. Moving is quite a chore. All the way from Indiana apparently. Talk about a long haul," she said with incredulous eyes, shaking her head as she looked between us.

"Yes, it's already been quite the adventure," he said, moving back to standing evenly beside me. "My mother lives here. She um," Luke paused, smile dropping. "She is quite sick. When something like that happens, being close to family matters most. So we along with my brother moved out here to look after her."

Her blue eyes withdrew into surprise and sympathy, the light hairs of her eyebrows raising. "Oh my gosh, that is awful. I'm so sorry you're going through that. Hopefully she will get better."

I almost wanted to laugh. She was so nice and here we are, dumping another hard lie. Luke pursed his lips, looking to the ground. "Thank you for your wishes, but the doctors only gave her two years." Luke shook his head. I bit my lip and rubbed his back in comfort. "That's why we were willing to move out here. Our mom didn't want to go back to Indiana, so we came out here."

Her cheeks turned red, eyes horrified. "I am so sorry this is happening." Attempting to help, she added. "At least you came out here and are doing everything you can to be there for her."

"Yeah, we are happy to be here," Luke said in a lighter tone. "It will be tough. But we will find work, make the best we can out of the time we have, and get through. We already have great neighbors it seems."

"Thank you," she scoffed. "So what kind of work do you guys do?"

"I use to be a self-defense teacher," Luke said.

"And I've always worked minimum wage jobs," I shrugged. "So there really wasn't much tying me down in Indiana. Plus, I am quite close with Kyle's mom," I said, feeling a need to justify why I came too. To be fair, I felt Luke and I both were revealing more than she was asking. But this was a good first attempt at our act and we wanted to be perfect.

Tucked against his arm, I drew warmth from his body and our casual words. This was all bullshit talk, obviously. Hearing his confidence though each time he spoke, and feeling his protective arm around me, I felt home. It was the greatest feeling I experienced since we arrived. Hell, maybe Grace wouldn't mind moving in with us. We'd be forced to stay this close all the time.

Good and bad effects came with this lovey-dovey act though. Like the feeling that crossed me when Grace rested her eyes on mine and responded.

"Regardless," she said, smile turning sweet for me. "It's wonderful that you were willing to go across the country with your boyfriend." Grace's eyes flicked up to Luke's. "She is definitely a keeper," she chuckled.

Instantly, I felt Luke tense beside me. I couldn't stop myself from glancing up to him, holding my smile in place. Behind it, I felt my joy in being this close to him crumble. My heart was sprinting. Luke's had to be too. After a long second of just smiling, he forced his eyes down to mine. His smile grew for the sake of our appearance. But those green eyes shed enough care and tension to turn my insides out.

"She really is. I don't know what I would do without her," he said, eyes in mine. "She's my world and keeps me strong."

His green stare froze my world. The façade we successfully were putting up was too convincing for me. Ironically, that zapped me back to Albany. Albany, the loser who wanted this man and couldn't have him like Peggy could.

Fake and convincing smile growing, Luke looked back to Grace. He hid the pain evident in his gaze, but his tightened jaw was clear to me.

When I glanced back to her with my own plastered grin too, I spoke. "Well, I have no idea what I would do without him."

For the smallest of a second, the moment after I said those words, my smile dropped. My eyes hit the ground in front of Grace. Hearing myself say those words... snapped my focus. Chills ran through me. Because what I said to her was 100% Albany's words. And after hearing my words, realizing how true they were... it scared me.

Our first meeting with our new neighbor wrapped up quickly after that. Grace said that she had to get back home. Her oldest can only stand watching her eight-year-old for so long until a yelling match takes place.

She offered us help whenever we may need it and went on her way. Watching her retreating figure from the door didn't feel good. Because I knew what was about to come. Reality.

Acting like Peggy felt wonderful for a few reasons. The first one was powerful: I didn't have to deal with Albany. All my issues, including why I had a hangover, disappeared. I was a new person in those moments spent talking to Grace. The second reason was more exciting. It started with the tingle Luke's close presence and warm arm brought. Being this close to the guy I can't stop craving and thinking about... yeah, you can bet that felt fucking good.

Yet... it turned a little too real. When he looked into my eyes and said those words, it snapped my own personal feelings back into play. I would be fooling myself if I believed only Kyle was behind those words. Facing that, and facing my real feelings about Luke, was too much for me to handle. I pushed it all out and turned my attention back to my achy state.

After we shut the door and our arms dropped, I avoided his eyes and began walking towards the kitchen. "And... no fucking pie," I muttered. I shouldn't complain though. Grace at least seemed nice.

Passing the stainless-steel fridge that hugged the corner next to the entry way, I went up to the sink and let the water run to cold. Opening the dark wooden cabinet above my head to the right, I grabbed a glass. Before I could relieve my scratchy throat, I paused with a sigh. I knew it was too good to hope for a playful response.

Receiving silence, I shut the water off and turned around. Luke stood there, leaning against the doorframe. The man trained himself well. Nothing but blankness was on his face when my eyes reached his. And it hurt me more. Seeing the blankness validated how fake and staged our sweetness was a moment ago.

It also validated that he was probably still trying to digest last night. Which reminded me of what I knew I needed to say. "Listen... I'm sorry about last night."

Luke gave me a generous smile. It came with a skeptical eye. "Sorry about what?"

"Getting wasted. And letting you be the caring adult."

He shrugged, walking into the kitchen more and to his left. Across from where I stood at the sink, he leaned his back against the black counter top. "I wasn't going to stop you."

Playing it off as no big deal was him trying to put it behind us. I now gave him a skeptical gaze. "It didn't bother you?"

He scoffed, looking down. "Depends on what parts you're talking about."

My need to know the remaining details of what happened overtook me. "Well, what happened? Look, all I know is we watching TV. Then I danced like an idiot, was talkative, and started shouting stuff."

Head dipped down, he froze, allowing only his eyes to rise to mine. There was a humorous glint in them. "You don't remember getting sick?"

Perfect. I shouldn't be surprised though. "No," I mumbled. "What happened?"

Tilting his head up with a smirk, he shook his head. "Dancing and stumbling around made you throw up on the floor."

Oh Christ. Sighing, I chuckled to myself. Believe me when I say it was in embarrassment and disgust though. There was nothing good about getting sick with Luke as a witness.

"You cleaned it up?" I cringed.

"Yeah. After I helped you wash your mouth out," he said softly, pursing his lips.

Fuck. He did not deserve that. "What else happened?" I groaned.

"Not much. After that, you were ready to sleep. You were very persistent about your sleeping arrangements. 'No unwanted kid deserves a bed' were the words you used. I couldn't convince you to go upstairs so you slept on the couch."

Of course. Leave it to me to get drunk and act pathetic. Then again, it's not like I didn't understand my words. The last two nights, I felt like worthless trash for a reason. Not like it mattered. Luke didn't need to be dragged into my mess. Shaking my head, I looked down to my feet.

I hated apologizing for things like this, but he deserved to hear it from me again. "Like I said, I'm really sorry."

"Don't be," he sighed.

"No, I am. Let me be fucked up, okay? You don't need to watch," I said in a quick voice, looking back up. I couldn't meet his eyes though. Luke's were back to the floor.

"Like I would ever be able to do that," he mumbled in despair under his breath. It was so quiet, he probably didn't intend for me to hear. Louder, he said, "I want to be there for you."

I chuckled to myself. Why was I fighting him? Saying sorry was all I could do. It wasn't like he would walk away from being there when I needed him. Luke gave me space when I needed it, which I appreciated, but he still was there for me. Still there to watch after me. The fact that he didn't push me to talk about it showed how strongly he felt about his part in being there for me.

Knowing that, along with the experience we just had with Grace, it left me feeling strange. Weak almost. Luke's caring nature and the act we put on left me unsure about a lot. Many of those things I wasn't willing to face. One problem at a time. Just because we began out show as Peggy and Kyle didn't mean I needed to confront my heartache.

It's why I was entirely fine when the subject changed. Luke's gaze back in focus on mine, it was like nothing happened. Hearing the carefreeness in his voice was a gift to both of us.

"So... you done drinking for right now?" he teased. "Because there is a lot we need to do. I think it's a shopping day. And do you know what that means?" he smiled.

"What's that?" I chuckled.

"We're buying some pie," he grinned.