Chapter 10

It was like the first time all over again.  Just like it was when I first arrived here and was starting my new life without Luke.  With a new home, a new identity, new people, and most importantly no Luke.  Only this time... I didn't have any hope of returning back to my old life like I had hoped at the beginning.  Before, I was promised a year and even then it was hard.  But at the very least, I believed the job would get done and I could go home.  After three years, no sign of Reid getting caught, and time damaging us... I knew it was unlikely.  But now I knew for certain I couldn't return.  Even if somehow they catch Reid, I couldn't go back.  Luke was so hurt and damaged, it wouldn't be good or healthy if I reentered his life again like that.  He deserved better and I wanted him to just be happy.

I hope he would follow what I said the other night.  I knew it would be hard for him like it was for me - more so than what he showed me.  He acted as calm as he could just as I did. Who knows though.  Because right now, I was a wreck.  I was a complete wreck with no desire to pick my mood up.  I'm always forced to pick my mood up and even now, as I heard the front door open, I would at least have to try and act semi-normal. It triggered a groan from deep within me.

It was like... maybe five or six in the evening.  I didn't look for a while but that was a good guess I was sure.  However, upon hearing my front door open from where I was laying in bed, I did know it was late enough for Jackson to walk his ass over here.  Maybe he expected dinner but I knew in the back of my mind he was just curious.  After all, this morning I woke up and didn't go over there for breakfast.  I didn't talk to him at all today - and he knew I would especially want to. 

I asked Jackson yesterday to check in with the FBI - if he could do that - and he said he will see what he could do.  After all, Spencer got that weird visit from the FBI and questioned him.  It just didn't sound like something the FBI would do so Jackson was going to check into that today.  Of course, me being here in bed and wrapped in a certain someone's coat wasn't what he was expecting I know.  He probably wanted to know what held me back from running over there to see if he got the job done.

Upon hearing the front door open, Jack jumped down away from where he was laying with me in bed and happily went to greet our visitor.  For me, I could only groan into Luke's coat I took three years ago and always kept.  Still had his scent, even just faintly.  But it did help a little.  Especially as I grabbed the collar of it and pulled it up higher around my neck and face a little.  It was big on me obviously but it felt calming to wear his coat.  It's all I did all day.  Just lay here in bed and cry a little here and there.  But don't you worry folks.  I ain't going soft on you guys.  I was just... well, hurting quite badly.

"Jackson, I don't feel good!" I yelled out, taking a deep breath.  I heard the door close and could only sigh.  There was no avoiding him.  Clearing my throat some more from where I was laying on my side and facing the door, I waited and watched for him to enter.  I could hear him coming down the hall.  Instantly, I made sure my face was blank with nothing besides some of my usual annoyance with him around. 

"And guess who doesn't care," I heard his familiar voice through the still air of the house as I heard him coming closer down the hall. My ajar door my eyes were pinned on, I saw Jack prance his way back through the doorway first and jump back up on my bed to just lay down with me, tail wagging as he looked to where Jackson followed and pushed the door open more as he casually walked in. 

His face was blank, void of emotion like it usually is.  Eyebrows raised over his observant eyes, he was in his usual wear of jeans and a plain dark shirt, today navy blue.  Hair slicked back dark brown, I saw that all was the same. However, as he entered my room, he stopped and just... stared at me blankly.  Looked me over where I was laying over my made bed in that coat around me.  Head to the pillow as I stared up at him, I pursed my lips.  I didn't need him here.  I just didn't care to deal with anybody today was all.   

He stared at me for the longest time. I think he seriously saw now I wasn't kidding when I said I wasn't feeling good.  He probably assumed I was sick and that kind of 'not feeling good.' Instead it was a much shittier feeling.  "What's wrong?" he asked in a mumble, clearly not wanting to ask and look as if he cared - even though he did.

"I just don't feel good is all.  Head hurts," I lied and offered him what I could.  Just a small smile that I could bet he could see right through.  But I was trying.  "It's been going on all day for some reason so I was just trying to get some rest," I nodded in a nonchalant manner. Just please go... I'm in the middle of some real pathetic shit that I need to be alone for.

He just shook his head as I finished speaking.  "Don't lie to me."

"I'm not," I groaned.  "Now tell me... did you contact the FBI?"  I knew that would keep his accusation in the dark - for now. Plus I was interested.  After all, this was more than a little suspicious.  If Spencer said the FBI questioned him, that's got to mean something.

He watched me for a long moment, staring down into my eyes as I watched him near my bed.  Stared intensely might I add.  His gaze was full of suspicion even as he answered me. "I was unable to reach them for now.  Maybe I will be able to later.  I'm sure though everything is fine with that.  However, either way, I know there is something going on with you.  You're lying.  What's going on?" He asked me sternly, eyes wider and lips screwed up in a slight scowl as he stared down at me.  "And why the hell are you wearing a coat?"

"Why the hell would I not wear a coat?" I muttered as I watched Jackson slowly groan and sit down on the side of my bed, turned slightly to look to where I was laying down.  It only made me groan too.  He sat down.  That means he is going to go hard on me now.  He knew something was up.  Oh the joy.

He ignored my stupid quip and all I could do was hope he wasn't going to be too stubborn on the matter.  He is a stubborn ass and I knew if he wanted answers, he would really push.  I took a deep breath against the material of the collar and of the pillow my head was on as well. "I'm going to give you a chance," he said in a slow and deep voice I didn't like.  At least he didn't look annoyed.  Rather interested and curious but stubborn on the matter.  Eyes searching mine, I saw him take a deep breath too.  "So tell me the truth.  I will not judge, I will probably not even care.  I need to know.  As your guardian."

"Look, it's really nothing and no big--"

"Albany," he said in a quieter voice.  Just as stern though.  It made chills run up me.  He doesn't use my real name a lot and because he did for once, it made a shiver run over my body.  Hairs raising on my arms, I gripped the hem of the sleeve of the coat and tried keeping a straight face.  My other hand started to nonchalantly pet Jack as he moseyed his way up to me.  His tail wagging and hitting against my leg, I noticed his excited beady eyes shoot from me to him. He clearly didn't feel what I was feeling - or Jackson. Lucky pup.  Jackson continued.  "You punched me in the face, thinking nobody told your boy toy that you were safe.  You dyed your hair, have been acting strange with me, and flipped out when you heard Spencer was questioned.  And now..." he shook his head and motioned with his hand that wasn't propped against the bed to my body.  "Look at you.  I would have figured you would have sprinted to my house and demanding to know if I contacted the FBI."

Sighing, I watched as Jackson shifted slightly, turning to face me more.  A leg bent under him as he came closer, his other still hanging off the bed, I watched him carefully.  One hand still propping him as he leaned his body, it made me do the same.  I knew he wasn't leaving any time soon.  Sitting up slightly as I pursed my lips and glanced down to Jack, I rested my elbow on the pillow and propped my head up to look at him straight.  "And...?" I pushed. All his points connected together perfectly.  I just wanted to push his accusation right out if he had one specifically.

"And you are making me worried!" he said in a much louder voice, desperately searching my eyes and leaning closer to me. Wanting an answer and for that moment, just a second, his guard was down.  And I could see into him.  See his true concern and care and it made my heart jump to know someone thought I mattered.  But I couldn't let my defenses fall like that.

"You have no reason to be," I nodded to him, hoping he understood that.  "Everything is fine now.  I just don't feel good today, okay?"

"I have every reason to be worried," he shot right back at me.

"Please Jackson.  Later?" I asked him - and in a nice voice.  I knew he cared and honestly, it kind of stung for some reason. 

"No."

"I feel like shit.  Now I get to look at you," I said, jokingly and trying to at least lighten his heavy and pressing attitude at the moment.  It only made him continue staring at me. 

"I know it has to do with your old step father," he said to me instantly, and shocking me with those words. His voice saying that... was very persistent. It only made my stomach twist that much harder and deeper.  Like pins to the skin digging in more.  Just the subject of him alone did me in a lot of the time and I would want to shut down.  And with him being right with his guess... I didn't like hearing that at all.  Or what he said next.  "I know that is his coat," he whispered with a dead scowl, eyes bright and fire.  And it made me audibly swallow and look down and away from his penetrating gaze.  I was a little surprised to hear he knew that too.  But then again... of course he would.  He was there with me when I took it from the house along with a few other things. It was hard to get things by him. 

I knew deep down that Jackson understood I had always been hurting over this man.  He never said anything though and probably because it wasn't his problem, even if he was concerned.  This whole time, I believe he knew I loved Luke.  Hell, I confessed it before to him when I first met Jackson and he was trying to get me into Witness Protection.  And again, he never said anything on the matter really.  Rarely at the beginning, he would come over and try to cheer me up.  But it was like he was really caring for me now.  And to care for him meant that he would be nosy, demanding, and stubborn. That he would try to get answers of all kinds out of me.

I took a long and deep sigh.  "Later.  Please. It's nothing that bad, trust me.  I will tell you later."  Tell you later when I can come up with a solid excuse and story to cover.  He didn't need to know that Luke was here, that we met a couple times.  He didn't need to know the risk either that was slowly making me paranoid.  "I appreciate your concern," I said in a genuine voice.  "But just not now, okay?" Just please leave and let me be.

Biting my lip, I started to toy with the ring against my palm that wasn't propping me up.  I just wanted him to go.  Blame me for being the typical emo-sounding kid but being alone would be nice. I even tried a supportive smile as his expression was blank again. His expression was calculating as well.  Jackson just stared at me for the longest time.  Silence filled the room and all that was really there were his intense eyes.  "Alright," he said in a quiet voice after what seemed like forever.  But he wasn't done.  "I'll leave you.  However, I want you out of this stupid funk you're in.  Let's go somewhere tomorrow and just get out.  How does that sound?"

If I wasn't so upset from what happened last night and Luke leaving, I would have laughed.  I did feel a small smile crack across my lips just for the fact that Jackson never suggested anything like that before.  I mean, this is the type of guy who stays home or goes out to get shit done.  And usually alone.  You didn't see him happy much or full of joy.  He was either annoyed, blank, sarcastic, an ass, or a good talker, and occasionally really nice.  But fun?  Ha.  He must really want me to feel better for some reason.  What was up with him?  Staring up at him now with my own eyes narrowed, he didn't even look happy to have suggested that.  But I could tell he meant it and wanted to. 

"I'll do it.  Just to see your ass out of your comfort zone," I nodded.  Who knows.  It could be fun. I didn't mind being around Jackson.  "But I really don't know if I will be in the mood tomorrow.  What about the next day?  I have work tomorrow anyway."

"I won't be out of my comfort zone.  And yeah, next day is fine," he said in a bland voice.  And with that, I saw he knew that today just wasn't that day for me and he would respect that.  Because with that, he stood up from my bed and crossed his arms, peering down at me.  "Do you want me to make you something to eat before I leave? Or decide that I just don't want to cook for you?"

I smiled softly, happy he offered.  "No but thanks anyways."

And with that and more curious looks from him, he left quickly after.  I was actually quite surprised he left that quickly.  I expected more pushing and pushing to the point where it would shake me up. But it just resulted in more things to consider and think about that wasn't just the horror of never seeing Luke again.  Like what the hell will I tell Jackson?  I said I will tell him later and stuff.  I needed an excuse and because the dude is observant, and knew it had to do with Luke, that only gave me so much to work with.  But that would come later.  I just needed the rest of the day.  I felt weak and tired and sad.  I'm not some whinny cry baby.  But like last night, today was needed.  Tomorrow would suck.  And the next day... who the fuck knows what me and Jackson are going to do when we hang out. 

***

I was still in a sour mood.  Luke was all I could think about and I had a bad feeling he would be all I could ever think about after this and our upsetting departure from each other.  But I couldn't be hung up on him like that in front of Jackson today.  I needed to at least try tonight and get out of this slump.  And I was surprised to find it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be with Jackson.  It actually was turning out to be quite fun, even with Luke circling the back of my mind. And even with this being a typical setting for Jackson anyway. 

I wasn't shocked in the least by where we went.  Jackson wasn't exactly creative. But it was actually very fun.  I mean, what's better than drinking together at his house?  Drinking at a bar with other annoying people. Usually going to bars is just not my cup of juice but hey, it actually wasn't bad.  It was fun and for a bar that is in walking distance, I realized we ought to come here more often. 

We sat at the bar, had a couple drinks.... Laughed and talked about whatever.  It was strange but Jackson was still his negative self, just in a good way.  He loosened up a bit, smiled more, and we actually had a good time.  Especially when the time came to shoot some pool - something I only did a couple times before.  After all, with the drinks and competitive spirit between us increasing, we knew it was time to get serious and play a game.  And by that point, I had drank enough to make me not nearly as panicked about the FBI.  Not worried, not nearly as sad as I was about Luke.  It was still there and I was still down.  But with the need to beat this jackass's ass at pool, it required a lot of attention - which I was very thankful for too.

"Alright, you ready to see how you beat a girl gracefully?" he said, narrowing his eyes in mine from where he was standing across the pool table from me.  Thankfully, this wasn't a crowded area like it was out by the bar.  This was in a room off to the side from the bar.  Wooden paneling lined the walls and the feel of it kind of reminded me of Seymour's.  It was nice.  The chatter from the bar traveled in muffles to us through the opening of the room.  Which meant more insults were fired throughout the game that could be heard clearly.  It had been a very cut throat game.  Now we were getting down to the nitty-gritty.

"How to beat a girl gracefully... You punch the shit out of her then give her a flower?" I asked, chuckling as I moved with my pool stick off to the side of the table, watching him adjacent to me.

Scoffing and rolling his eyes at my stupid joke, his eyes fell back to the green felt of the table.  Under the dim and cheap light above the table, it allowed him to line up his balls.  It's already to be assumed he didn't have too many balls - and you would be right! That was the case in pool too. He had only one left to pocket, I had maybe six left to get in. It was getting intense even though it was clear I would probably lose.

I watched him as he lined up the pool stick, getting low to aim the cue ball towards the three ball he looked he could maybe get in.  Of course, it also meant  getting dangerously close to the eight ball in the process. "I'll laugh my ass off if you get the eight in," I grinned over to him.  It would mean him losing the game and like I said, we were getting quite competitive at this point. 

Jackson, bent over slightly with the end of the stick between his fingers - yes, yes that's what she said - and aiming, he paused and found my eyes.  He only arched a brow, not making any other change in his concentrated expression.  "And I'll laugh my ass off when I win," he responded calmly, his stance never changing when he glanced back down to where he was intently focusing where he was looking to hit.  Which was where the three ball was close to the corner pocket and where the eight ball was touching it.  He would have to hit it perfectly to get the three in and if he did, he wins.

And guess what?  The guy fucking did it.  He hit the cue ball and it return, it knocked the three ball in perfectly with a noise when it went in.  He won.  I didn't even want to fathom this terrible loss. Because god damn it, he won.  "Aw what the cock!?" I groaned loudly, enough for maybe a few people out by the bar to hear.  But I didn't care.  My eyes narrowed on Jackson, who I saw was close to cracking up at my reaction at losing. His pursed lips quivering slightly as his eyes moved down, he stifled it as he leaned back and against the wall of the room, letting me finish up my dying words of the game.   "That's really not fair.  I knew from the start this was rigged," I said in a strong voice to hide my slight amusement. I tossed the pool stick lightly on the table after Jackson set his up there too and he started laughing.

However, he quickly composed his face as he looked at me.  He crossed his arms, his face straight again and he just scoffed.  "I won, you lost.  Go fucking cry.  But only after one more drink."

Rolling my eyes, I grabbed my bag from where I set it on the ground as we were playing.  After all, money just won't do in my pockets; I needed a license with just turning 21 and drinking so that's why I had to carry this annoying purse around.  However, Jackson was nice enough to pay for everything tonight.  Including the one more drink for each of us we agreed on as we walked out of the little room and into the much more louder bar area.

I was happy to consume more as you guys could probably guess.  But Luke still was there in the back of my head.  I managed to block him out mostly but he had always been there.  Then we got that last drink and as I chugged it down, and just as Jackson sipped at his drink and eyed me, I felt the subject near... and Luke wouldn't leave my head from then on.  The subject of that question that Jackson would ask me again even with how great tonight was.  After all... he wanted an answer and I said I would give him one.  Maybe that was his reason for going to the bar with me - to loosen me up to tell him what's been up with me.  But I doubted it.

We were slowly starting to walk home along the main street here that went in the direction of our little court we were living in.  The sidewalks were crooked, shadowed by the clouds hiding the moon... Spaced out street lights made things harder to see but I managed.  Enough to glance up to Jackson a couple times as we walked and saw his expression.  I could feel the question in the air near, even with alcohol in my system.  I saw it coming from a mile away.  Yet it still sent chills over me....

"Listen, I still want an answer.  What is up with you?" he put and I could strangely hear his tone change.  To something more appealing and a little lighter, less serious.  Maybe so the topic wouldn't seem as daunting to me.  Maybe he was trying to trick the answer out of me.  Staring up at him as he brought it up, his eyes stood out and shined.  A glint.  Almost a caring glint but a suspicious one that stared at nothing in front of him.

Thankfully, I had my excuse on hand.  Of course, remembering that he mentioned he knew it had to do with Luke.  I was just thankful I wasn't drunk for this question.  I might have actually told him what had went on days prior. So, taking a deep breath and pursing my lips, I glanced up to him where I could see his eyes watching me as we walked.  "I was just... missing my old life.  And it was really just because I noticed someone come into Seymour's that I recognized from my life before...." Don't worry folks; I had it covered.  A good lie and one Jackson would believe in my opinion. "It was some kid from my old high school. I avoided him, left work, and the guy never saw me.  But it was just... unnerving.  The fact that he might have recognized me if he saw me... it got me thinking that if he had recognized me, then Albany Higgins wasn't dead.  Maybe people were still looking and it got me paranoid seeing the articles.  To know maybe someone could find me from my old life - or Reid - it seemed more like a possibility.  It's made me scared and just remembering my old life is all. It got me missing Luke."

I knew it should do well with him.  I had an explanation for each thing because I knew the type of man Jackson was: tough and curious with a need for more.  More answers.  He wouldn't nod his head and call it a day.  He was a good interrogator at heart. "So..." he licked his lips.  "You're telling me you punched me in the face because you recognized some kid from school?"

I nodded, noticing we were getting closer to our corner which we would turn down and head down another short road where the sidewalk ended and grass grew around the shoulder of the road. Sighing, I stared down at my feet moving.  "Yeah.  It got me paranoid and from that, I discovered those articles online.  Which made me think the FBI never told Luke I was safe because the articles suggested he was still looking for me."

"What were the articles like?" he pressed, his voice hardening.  That's one thing I didn't expect.  Especially because I told him this before and he just said it was odd and that he didn't know if the FBI said anything or not.  Jackson gave them my message and they didn't follow through, which I found out by talking to Luke.  Not articles.  Hell, maybe there were none.  I never found any. Or, like I knew, the FBI most likely hid them from me.  Luke did everything he could and I'm sure that filled up every aspect of media Luke could access to spread his word. 

"Can't recall but it was from a year back about the troubles the Prenta family was going through."

He nodded slowly and looked down, taking a deep breath as he pursed his lips and didn't look at me for a long moment as we walked.  Walked in silence and through shifting shadows thanks to car lights occasionally hitting us. My eyes finding him silent at my side, we slowly followed the curb as it turned into a different road that was leading us home. "You were flipping out.  You were upset," he said, scoffing at that thought to keep up his stone face he was projecting.

"Well yeah.  The FBI is lying to me and I now, I see some kid from my old life... eventually someone is going to think Morgan looks a little too much like Albany - especially if news is still circulating and the FBI has been hiding that from me too."

The sidewalk ended, and we stepped onto the grass on the side of the road and kept walking.  Much shorter of a walk than it is from home to Seymour's.  But long enough to make me notice how quiet Jackson got.  Looking up to my side and into his eyes, I watched him shake his head and offer me a slightly sympathetic gaze.  One that was gone just as quickly as it was there.  "I tried getting a meeting in with them, like I said before.  And like I said a few days ago, I couldn't reach them for some reason.  So... it's hard to say this being a part of the FBI but I do think that there is something they aren't telling you.  But for now... until I can contact them, just try to calm down a little. Relax.  You just saw some kid you recognized from before.  You know how much your looks have changed - and now that you dyed your hair again?"

His voice was blank like usual as was his face I noticed as we continued walking.  But his voice held truth; even if I fed him a lie, it still held some truth.  I mean what could I do right now about the matter?  The FBI didn't tell Luke shit, they probably blocked news from me about my old life getting around, now questioning Spencer...?  But what could I really do?  He was right, I just needed to calm down until I can see those lying dick heads again.

We kept walking... and walked more with a few more questions from Jackson as we got closer. Questions that weren't as pressing as I figured they would be on me. Then we got there, turning down the street of the court and our houses were already in sight.  Lit from the openness of the area, the street lights... I would be happy to actually get home and go to bed, even though I knew that meant just a few more tears and hopeless thoughts about Luke.  But after a nice night and a little drinking, maybe I can just fall asleep. After all, I noticed, the more times you fall asleep and wake up, the more something can fade.  I just prayed it could apply to this situation.

We continued walking side by side in the street, knowing this little court didn't have any traffic and especially at this hour.  And when we got close enough to our driveways that were both across the street from each other, we said our good nights. 

"Alright, now you better be by for breakfast tomorrow, got it?" Jackson spoke up, having paused with me in the street.  Facing me with his back to his driveway as my stance was the same, I looked him over slightly. He was always standing straight like someone of authority.  I cocked an eyebrow and stared up into his stone eyes and blank smooth face.  His words actually made me crack a small smile. 

"And why do you want me over for breakfast?  You like me coming over for company, don't you?" I teased.  It's not like we admit those kinds of things to each other.  Holding back my smile, I saw his answer coming and it made me chuckle as he spoke. 

"No, I just know that when you aren't bugging me at breakfast, something's up.  That's one problem I do not need."

"Right," I scoffed, seeing his arms folded professionally behind his back as he stared down at me.  He sighed and rolled his eyes at me just as I started backing up my driveway and away from him.  "Alright then, fine. I'll be there.  Bye ass-wipe," I said to him, laughing softly as I turned and started walking up my driveway.

"Night," he replied in amusement, shaking his head as he started walking up his own driveway.  Both ready for bed, and both needing rest I was sure.  Jackson always did and I know I sure felt my body and mind needed rest tonight.  

Sighing, and rubbing the back of my neck under my hair, I looked up at the dark house and could already feel my bed calling for me.  That and maybe food. It was something to look forward to, even after a fun evening.  Luke would still echo in my head and heart and I needed to do what I could to try to get over his sweet voice in my head.  His beautiful face and touch.... God, I just need to sleep and stop thinking.

I think that's why it took so long for me to noticed something was wrong when I walked into my own house.  

Taking a deep breath as my eyes stayed on the ground, I grabbed the handle of the front door and opened the door, heading inside.  Which felt so nice compared to the humid air of summer outside.  Cool air and no noise around me.  A stillness that had grown a little depressing after all this time in this house.  Nothing but my own noises of doing whatever in my home.  Including when I sighed, slipping my bag off my shoulder and throwing it on the counter as I moved more into the kitchen.  Yawning, I ran a hand through my hair, my eyes finding the sink in the dim kitchen.  Nothing but the little stove light I always kept on and the little light from the windows was enough to let me see as I reached for a glass in the cupboard. 

Just as I did, and was about to get myself a glass of water, I just... had to pause for a moment.  A very strange moment which I was slowly realizing. But why?  What is... off?  What is different?  I could feel it around me, that there was something wrong.  Something wasn't right, not the same.... But what?!  Everything seemed normal.  It was always like this in the house. So then what... what is it?  

I stood there for the longest moment, staring down at the sink I was about to turn on.  I could feel my eyebrows were lowered in confusion, a state of stillness of my own that matched the house.  What was it...? What's different?

Jack.

Where was Jack?  My head jerked up and I turned around.  Looking - looking everywhere around me.  To the dimly reflecting floor of the kitchen to the furniture beyond the kitchen in the living room.  No Jack.  My arms crossed automatically as I stood there in the kitchen, not understanding.  Jack always greets people at the door.  Especially me.  He is always happy to see anyone. I would have heard his paws prancing on the floors to meet me at the door.  Where was my buddy?

My heart jumped up and down to my core.  I felt a little sick at the moment, it was just that unsettlling.  Jack is always happy and excited to see me.  Where is he?  It was just that thought that continued to make my eyes shoot all over the place for him as I quickly moved out of the kitchen and into the living room.  Jack wasn't in the living room from what I could see and with that, I started down the dark hall into my bedroom.

The door open as it always is, I stepped inside and could feel myself exhale in relief.  I saw Jack on my bed.  Even if just the shape of him laying on my bed, that was enough.  Couldn't see anymore than just the fact that he was on my bed.  I just wish I knew what was wrong with him?  Sick?  Maybe.

"Aw buddy! What's wrong? Why didn't my little guy--" I cut myself off.  Or rather I didn't have much of a choice.  The words I was about to say were wiped from my existence the moment I flicked the light on in my room.  The light flooded every inch of space.  But my eyes only stayed pinned on my dog laying in the middle of my bed.  I was frozen, even as so much just shifted within me at the sight before me.

At the sight of my buddy for more than three years laying there on my bed.  His always excited beady eyes were staring in my direction. Just without any life.  There was no life in him at all like there always was.  He was always so full of fun and energy and a randomness I loved and now... it was gone from him.  And with the heartbreaking sound of my voice breaking at the horrid sight, there was no questioning that that life in him was gone now. 

Especially with the blood from his little furry self that seeped out and onto my bed.  Seeped... or spread.  It was so much for my eyes to take in, it disabled something major in my head I couldn't control.  No thoughts.  Just so much blood... coated into my poor dog's soft fur and all over my bed.  Thanks to what I saw were several deep slashes or marks that had cut deep into him and ended my little pup's life.

Before I could comprehend it, take it in and gasp and cry, I realized... I wasn't alone in my house.  Not when I heard the footsteps coming from behind me.  I was pushed hard into my room with the door slamming behind the man that was now in here with me.