2016 had been a pretty monumental year for Leia and Taylor, together and individually. 

Leia had gone from a very small and niche signer-songwriter to becoming a household name in less than a year. Her debut album had topped the charts, she'd moved into her own apartment in NYC and had even been able to start to pay for all of Georgie's University tuition.

She'd met lots of incredible people - Taylor included - and while she'd experienced a pretty low moment in the form of Dylan Redcrown, her year had been overall out-of-this world. She'd had a lot of incredible and outstanding moments, but falling in love with Taylor had definitely been her top.

Taylor's 2016... well, that looked a lot different. She'd gone from being one of the world's most loved popstars to having millions of people tweeting #TaylorSwiftIsOverParty and inevitably feeling like she was unable to show herself in the public eye because of the Kanye and Kim drama.

Her mental health had been the lowest that it ever had, and she wasn't sure who she could and couldn't trust these days. Only a few of her friends had really seemed to check in on her on a regular basis, and many had backstabbed her as soon as the drama started.

The only good thing to come out of 2016 for her was Leia Hudson.

Despite everything in her life falling apart, Leia seemed to be the one thing Taylor was able to count on as constant these days. They'd spent the first week of 2017 curled up on each other's sofas, both pop-stars having no commitments over the holiday season despite Leia's ever-growing album schedule. 

Leia had decided that she wanted some stability for Georgie for a few months, so she'd made sure that she was planning on being home in Manhattan for at least a few months. This had pleased Taylor - NYC felt so lonely without Leia around. It didn't used to feel that way... the city used to excite her and comfort her. Now the very thought of stepping into the city and being recognised almost sent her into a panic attack.

Taylor had been very firm with Tree and her team when deciding that she wanted to take a break. It seemed that no matter what she did, the hate never seemed to stop. She'd even disabled all of her instagram comments and had deleted the twitter app from her phone. Tumblr was tough... but she would miss her fans too much if she stopped that too.

So when Taylor had told Leia that she had no plans to perform in 2017, Leia couldn't say she was initially surprised. She had assumed Taylor was just in a mood, and making another small throwaway comment that she didn't think she'd thought through. 

The night after Super Saturday Night in February, Taylor returned to her New York apartment, her shoulders sagging with exhaustion. Leia was waiting for her, curled up on the plush sofa with a mug of chamomile tea. As Taylor walked in, Leia's eyes widened at the sight of her girlfriend. 

The blonde's usual radiant energy was dimmed, her blue eyes clouded with a mixture of fatigue and something deeper - a sadness that seemed to cling to her very being. Leia put her tea down slowly, unsure what to say as Taylor kicked her sneakers off at the door and leaned down to scratch behind Meredith's ears.

"Hey," Leia said softly, slowly rising to greet Taylor. "How was it?"

Taylor let out a long, shaky breath as she stood up and shrugged off her coat.

"It was... it was fine," she replied, her voice barely above a whisper. "But Leia, I... I can't do this anymore."

Leia's brow furrowed with concern as she guided Taylor to the sofa. They sat down together, and Leia took Taylor's hands in hers, noting how cold they felt. She almost wondered how long Taylor had been standing outside the apartment door, almost as if she was too ashamed to face Leia. Taylor's gaze dropped to their intertwined fingers, unable to meet Leia's eyes.

"I meant what I said before. I'm not going to be seen in 2017. I can't... I can't face it anymore."

The weight of Taylor's words hung heavy in the air between them. Leia felt her heart constrict, realising the full extent of Taylor's pain. 

"I just... I just want to pretend I don't exist," Taylor continued, her voice cracking as tears pooled in her eyes. "No more performances, no more public appearances. I have to... I need to disappear for a while."

The words hung heavy in the air between them. Leia felt her stomach drop, her mind racing to process what Taylor was saying. Leia felt helpless. She wanted to comfort her girlfriend, to tell her that everything would be okay, but the words felt hollow and almost... hypocritical to come from her mouth. How could she possibly understand the weight of the world that Taylor carried on her shoulders - especially when Leia was rising in not just the charts, but popularity too?

"I... I don't know what to say," Leia admitted, her voice soft.

"I don't want you to say anything," Taylor replied, her voice a little wispy - as if she was in a dream and not really sitting on the sofa with her. "I don't need you to say anything. I just want you to support me on this, and not try to make me feel like I'm letting everyone down."

Leia felt that statement was aimed at someone, but she knew it wasn't an attack on her. She could see Taylor's frustration and devastation at how everything was working out.

"Come here," Leia whispered, letting go of Taylor's hands and pulling her into a tight hug.

Taylor leaned into Leia, her body shaking with silent sobs. Leia wrapped her arms around the blonde, holding her close as she cried. The room fell silent except for the sound of Taylor's muffled tears and the distant hum of the city outside.

____

Weeks later, the crisp February air nipped at Leia's cheeks as she hurried down the bustling New York sidewalk. She was reminded that it was almost March, and three months had flown by without a single moment of hesitation.

Taylor was staying true to her word, and hadn't booked any more public appearances for the rest of the year. She was becoming a recluse - staying in her apartment more and more and convincing Mark, Drew and the rest of her security team to occasionally play scrabble with her when Leia was busy. Georgie had even taken to dropping in to the Cornelia Street apartment to check on Taylor on her way home from classes.

Leia shivered a little, the city around her humming with its usual frenetic energy. Despite that, she felt oddly disconnected from it all. Her mind was a whirlwind of tour dates, set lists, and costume fittings, punctuated by moments of worry for Taylor.

As she approached the sleek glass building that housed her management team, she took a deep breath, steeling herself for the meeting ahead. The revolving doors whooshed as she entered, the sudden warmth a stark contrast to the biting chill outside.

The soft ding of the elevator reaching the 23rd floor snapped Leia out of her reverie. She walked down the hallway, her footsteps muffled by the plush carpet. The walls were adorned with platinum records and magazine covers featuring various artists, including her own. It still felt surreal to see her face among them.

The conference room was awash in natural light, floor-to-ceiling windows offering a panoramic view of the city skyline. Riven and Adrian were already there along with various other faces from the label that Leia was slowly starting to get used to, heads bent over a scatter of papers and laptops. They looked up as Leia entered, their faces brightening.

"There's my boss!" Riven exclaimed, his infectious energy filling the room. He stood to give Leia a quick hug, the scent of his cologne momentarily enveloping her. 

Leia gave him a weird look as she sat down beside Adrian, unsure why Riven was more excited to see her than usual. They'd been in these tour planning meetings since the start of 2017, so it wasn't like this was unusual for him to see her at.

"Leia," Adrian greeted her with a nod. "Let's get started, shall we?"

For the next hour, they pored over the intricate details of the summer tour. Cities were confirmed, venues locked in (they'd gone from small intimate venues to upgrading to arenas with the predicted demand that her label had been tracking), and promotional strategies discussed. Leia found herself getting caught up in the excitement despite her initial reservations. The idea of connecting with her fans across the country, of sharing her music on such a grand scale, was exhilarating.

Georgie was - of course - coming with her on each tour date. Their parents were skeptical at first, but after realising that Georgie was already in the limelight and being on tour with Leia meant that she wouldn't be staying alone in New York for the Summer, they quickly agreed. Besides, Leia had told Georgie that she could come on one condition - she looked after Tate when Leia was weighed down with other touring tasks.

"So, for the announcement," Riven said, pulling up a mockup of a social media post on the large screen at the end of the room. "We're thinking of doing a series of teasers leading up to the big reveal. Maybe some cryptic Instagram stories, a few tweets with lyrics that hint at the tour theme. What do you think?"

Leia nodded, her eyes scanning the proposed content. "I like it. It's mysterious enough to get people talking, but not so vague that it'll frustrate the fans."

Adrian chimed in, "And we could culminate with a live stream announcement. Give the fans a chance to interact directly with you."

They continued to brainstorm for another forty minutes, until Adrian called for a break. All of the other members of her new team decided to head down to the coffee shop on the seventh floor, while she opted to stay back with the two original members of their team.

As the room cleared out and Leia was left alone with Adrian and Riven, her publicist turned to look at her with a gentle smile as his voice dropped slightly lower in case anyone was lurking around outside.

"So, um, about the guest list," he began, his tone carefully casual as Adrian shot him a warning look, having already told Riven to be delicate when bringing the next question up. "Do you know which dates we should add Taylor to? I'm assuming she'll want to catch a few shows across the Summer?"

The room fell silent, the earlier excitement evaporating in an instant. Adrian closed his eyes, rubbing at his temples as he noticed the instant drop of the smile on Leia's face and knew that they'd hit a sensitive topic.

 "Um," she began, her voice barely above a whisper. She cleared her throat and tried again. "Taylor... she won't be coming to any of the shows."

Riven and Adrian exchanged a quick glance, confusion evident on their faces. They'd discussed this and thought Leia would be more skeptical on how they would carry out hiding Taylor at the shows, but they certainly hadn't expected her to be instantly dismissal of the idea itself.

"Is everything okay?" Adrian asked carefully, his brow furrowed with concern. Leia had the feeling that he was no longer looking at Leia Hudson, the global sensation, but rather Leia, the girl that he viewed as a third daughter.

Leia hesitated, her gaze dropping to her hands as she fidgeted with her rings. She took a deep breath, trying to find the right words to explain the complex situation without betraying Taylor's trust.

"Taylor's... taking some time for herself right now," Leia said slowly, choosing her words carefully. "She's not planning on making any public appearances this year. Including at my shows."

Riven's eyes widened in surprise, while Adrian nodded slowly, a look of understanding crossing his face.

"I see," Adrian said gently.

"Is she okay?" Riven asked, his usual exuberance subdued. "I know Tree said it had been getting to her..."

"She's... struggling. The past year has been really hard on her. She just needs some time away from the spotlight."

There was a moment of silence as they all processed the weight of the conversation. Leia felt a familiar pang of worry for Taylor, mixed with a twinge of guilt about her own rising success. There was something else though - a slight simmering of anger at the fact that this was happening to Taylor during the one time Leia wanted her to be by her side the most. She pushed it down.

"How are you holding up?" Adrian asked gently, his fatherly concern evident.

"Ehm," Leia paused, going to say she was fine. But when she reopened her mouth, nothing came out. Adrian nodded, a look in his eyes that she couldn't place.

"Well, let's focus on making this tour the best it can be," he said, his tone gentle but encouraging. "Taylor may not be able to attend, but we can still create something amazing for your fans."

Leia nodded, grateful for the shift in focus. As they dove back into the details of the tour, she felt a renewed sense of purpose. She might not be able to fix everything for Taylor, but she could pour her heart into her music and create something beautiful in the midst of the chaos.

And hopefully, it would distract her from the hurt in her heart that Taylor wasn't coming to support her.

____

 Her tour tickets officially went on sale on the first day of March.

In less than eleven minutes, all of the dates on Leia's tour had sold out. 

There were seventy-four shows planned across the span of 3 months. She would start her United States leg in Washington, before finishing in California and then starting a limited number of shows in Canada, a few in the UK and Europe - where she was also set to perform at various music festivals during her time there such as Glastonbury, and then finish the tour off with her last five shows back in the USA.

And all of that... had sold out.

Leia's dad had been the first to call her, the man having been on video calls with the tour representatives from her label as they updated him and Adrian on the figures as they came through.

Leia's phone buzzed incessantly as congratulatory messages poured in. She stared at the screen in disbelief, her hands shaking slightly as she tried to process the enormity of what had just happened. Seventy-four sold out shows. It was beyond anything she could have imagined when she first started writing songs in her bedroom.

"Leia! Did you see?" Georgie burst into the room, her eyes wide with excitement. Tate bound up from where he had been curled against Leia's legs, sensing the energy shift that came with Georgie and starting to bounce too. "You sold out! Every single show!"

Georgie threw her arms around her sister, squealing with delight.

"I'm so proud of you," Georgie whispered, her voice thick with emotion.

As the initial shock began to wear off, Leia felt a surge of conflicting emotions. Pride and excitement warred with a gnawing sense of guilt. Her first instinct was to call Taylor, to share this monumental moment with the person who meant the most to her. But she hesitated, her finger hovering over Taylor's name in her contacts.

She wasn't sure why she paused. 

Leia took a deep breath and pressed the call button before she could talk herself out of it. The phone rang once, twice, three times. Just as Leia was about to hang up, thinking Taylor might be asleep or busy, the line connected.

"Hey," Taylor's soft voice came through, a hint of sleepiness in her tone.

"Hey," Leia replied, suddenly unsure of what to say. "I... um, did I wake you?"

"No, no," Taylor assured her. "I was just reading. What's up? Tour selling okay?"

Leia felt a lump form in her throat at Taylor's nonchalant question. Of course Taylor knew today was the day tickets went on sale. She had helped Leia pick out some of the tour outfits just a few weeks ago.

"Yeah, it's... it's selling really well actually," Leia said, trying to keep her voice steady. "All the shows sold out in eleven minutes."

"Oh my god, Leia!" Taylor's voice suddenly came alive, filled with genuine excitement. "That's incredible! I'm so proud of you!"

Leia felt a rush of relief and warmth at Taylor's words. She could hear the smile in her girlfriend's voice, and it made her own lips curl up in response. She felt guilty that she'd even doubted that Taylor would have reacted any other way.

As Taylor continued to gush about how proud she was, Leia felt the knot in her stomach slowly unravel. She'd been so worried about how Taylor would react, given her own struggles with the spotlight. But here she was, genuinely happy for Leia's success.

"I wish you could be there," Leia found herself saying before she could stop herself. The words hung in the air between them, heavy with unspoken emotions.

There was a pause, and Leia could almost hear Taylor's internal struggle. When she spoke again, her voice was softer, tinged with a hint of regret.

"I'm sorry I can't be there for the shows," Taylor said, her voice barely above a whisper. "I wish I could, but..."

"I know," Leia cut in, not meaning to be sharp but her voice having an ever so slight edge to it. "It's okay. I understand."

Another pause, heavier this time.

"I love you," Taylor said finally. "And I'm so, so proud of you."

"I love you too."

They sat in silence for a moment, the weight of their separate struggles hanging between them. Finally, Leia spoke.

"Do you want me to come over? We could celebrate quietly, just the two of us."

"No," Taylor said quickly. "No, you should be out celebrating with your team. This is huge, Lei. Don't let me hold you back."

Leia wanted to argue, to insist on being there for Taylor... but she didn't. She held back a frustrated sigh, instead letting out a hum and listening as Taylor changed the topic to how she was thinking about redecorating the kitchen in her apartment while Leia was away on tour. They spoke a little while longer, but Leia was sure Taylor could tell her mind wasn't there - it was on her tour.

As they said their goodbyes, Leia felt a bittersweet ache in her chest. She was on the cusp of the biggest adventure of her life, but the person she wanted by her side couldn't be there. 

She looked out the window at the New York skyline, the city buzzing with its usual energy. Her lips cracked into a smile as she slowly started getting ready for her celebratory meal with Riven and Georgie, excited to step back outside and embrace the city that seemed to know her better than herself.

Somewhere out there, Taylor was hiding from that same city, seeking solace in solitude.

_____

"...and not only have sources claimed that Leia Hudson is getting excessively cosier with her newfound pop-star bestie, but it appears that the girls may be more than just friends. Sources claim that the two spend more time in each others apartments than their own, even spending several nights together before one will depart the others apartments."

Leia sunk further into the chair as Tree continued to read through the article that had caused them all to have an emergency video call meeting at 5am on a Saturday morning, only a few days after Leia's tour dates had sold out.

The silence that followed Tree's recitation was deafening. Leia's eyes darted between the faces on her screen, taking in the varied expressions. Adrian's brow was furrowed in concern, Riven was biting his lower lip nervously, and Taylor... Taylor's face was a mask of carefully controlled panic.

"This can't be happening," Taylor finally broke the silence, her voice tight with barely contained emotion. "We need to shut this down immediately."

Leia felt a sharp pang in her chest at Taylor's words. She understood the need for privacy, especially given Taylor's current state, but the vigour in her girlfriend's voice stung nonetheless.

"We can issue a statement," Tree suggested, her tone professional and measured. "Something along the lines of 'Taylor Swift and Leia Hudson are close friends and nothing more. The continuous speculation from valueless sources about their relationship is unfounded, harmful and disrespectful to both parties and their friendship.'"

Leia's gaze flicked to Taylor's video feed. The blonde was chewing on her bottom lip, a habit Leia knew meant she was deep in thought and trying to keep her anxiety at bay.

Adrian cleared his throat, his eyes flickering between Leia and Taylor on the screen.

"While I understand the need for discretion, we need to be careful about how we handle this. Leia's fan base is largely supportive of LGBTQ+ rights. An overly aggressive denial could backfire."

Riven nodded in agreement. "He's right. We don't want to alienate Leia's fans or make it seem like we're ashamed of anything. Maybe we could..."

"No," Tree cut in, her voice sharp. "We can't leave any room for speculation. It needs to be clear and definitive."

Leia watched as a flicker of frustration crossed Riven's face. She knew he was protective of her image and career, and this situation was putting him in a difficult position. But this wasn't just public relations - this was personal for both Riven and Leia. He knew what it was like to have to hide that part of you... and it stung him to see Leia go through it despite being publicly out.

"What about a distraction?" Riven suggested, and Tree instantly spoke up.

"Fake relationships," Tree said, her tone now brimming with enthusiasm. Everyone on the call seemed to stall, realising that she was serious. "For both Leia and Taylor. It's the perfect distraction."

Leia felt her stomach twist, a mixture of shock, disgust and discomfort washing over her. She glanced at Taylor's video feed, looking for any indication that Taylor was as uncomfortable with the idea as she was.

"We control the narrative," Tree continued. ""Think about it. We could carefully select partners for each of you both. Interesting enough to generate buzz, but not so famous that it overshadows either of your careers. We could orchestrate a few strategic public outings, and maybe a red carpet appearance or two for you, Leia, before you go on tour. The media would be in a frenzy, and these current rumours would be all but forgotten. That way, you can continue to see each other without worrying about relationship speculation."

Adrian leaned back in his chair, his expression thoughtful. 

"It's not an uncommon practice in the industry," he mused, his tone neutral as his eyes avoided glancing at Leia. He knew she'd hate it. But he was here to ensure she could keep doing this, and if that's what it took...

Leia felt as if the room was spinning. The idea of pretending to date someone else, of watching Taylor do the same, made her feel physically ill. She opened her mouth to protest, but Taylor's voice cut through first.

"I... I think we should consider it," Taylor said, her voice barely above a whisper.

Leia's head snapped up, her eyes locking onto Taylor's image on the screen. She searched her girlfriend's face, looking for any sign that this was a joke, that she didn't really mean it. But Taylor's expression was resolute, even as her eyes shimmered with unshed tears.

Riven's face hardened, unsure what to make of the scene he was watching unfold on his laptop screen.

Leia felt as if she'd been punched in the gut. The world seemed to tilt on its axis as she struggled to process Taylor's words. She opened her mouth to speak, but no sound came out.

"It's... it's not ideal," Taylor continued, her voice shaking slightly. "But it might be the best way to protect ourselves right now. To protect what we have."

"You can't be serious," she said, her words barely above a whisper.

Taylor's eyes met hers through the screen, a mixture of pain and determination in her gaze. "Lei, I think it's the best option we have right now. It would give us the cover we need to-"

"To what?" Leia interrupted, her voice rising. "To continue to just pretend we're something we're not? To lie to everyone, including our fans?"

"Leia," Adrian began, his tone cautious. "I know this isn't ideal, but-"

"No," Leia cut him off, shaking her head vehemently. "I don't want to do it."

Tree leaned forward, her expression stern.

"Leia, you need to think about the bigger picture here. This isn't just about you. Taylor's career-"

"What about my career?" Leia shot back, anger flaring in her chest. "What about my integrity? My authenticity? What about how I fucking feel?"

The room fell silent again, the tension palpable even through the digital connection. Leia's eyes darted between the faces on her screen, landing finally on Taylor's. The blonde looked torn, her brow furrowed with conflict. Leia's outburst had just shown Taylor something she'd been fearing - that the secrecy was taking a toll on Leia.

"Taylor," Leia said softly, her voice cracking slightly. "Please don't ask me to do this."

Taylor's eyes welled with tears, and she opened her mouth to respond, but no words came out. The silence stretched on, thick and heavy, as everyone waited for her response. When she finally spoke, her voice was barely above a whisper, trembling with emotion.

"Leia, I... I know this isn't fair to ask of you. But right now, I feel like I'm drowning. Every time I step outside, every time I see my name in the headlines, it's like the world is closing in on me. I can't breathe. I can't think. And the thought of our relationship being thrown into that chaos..." She paused, swallowing hard. "I'm not strong enough for that right now. I need this. Please."

The raw vulnerability in Taylor's voice sent a shiver down Leia's spine. She could see the pain etched into every line of her girlfriend's face, the fear that seemed to radiate from her very being. It was a side of Taylor that few people ever got to see - the fragile, uncertain woman behind the polished pop star facade.

"Every single thing in my life is owned by someone else - my music, my reputation, my past relationships... This - us - is the one thing I have left that's not tainted."

Leia felt her resolve crumbling, even as her heart ached at the thought of what Taylor was asking. She glanced around at the other faces on the screen - Adrian's concern, Riven's quiet support, Tree's calculating gaze.

The room seemed to shrink around her, the walls of her apartment closing in. Leia could hear the distant hum of the city outside her window, life going on as normal while her world tilted on its axis.

Leia could hear her own heartbeat thundering in her ears, could feel the eyes of everyone on the call boring into her. She looked at Taylor's face on the screen, saw the mixture of desperation and determination in her eyes, and felt something inside her crumble.

For a moment, she was transported back to that night after her breakup with Dylan, when Taylor had first kissed her. The exhilaration, the promise of something beautiful and real. How far they had come since then, and yet here they were, about to take a step that felt like moving backwards.

"Okay," Leia said, her voice so soft it was barely audible. She cleared her throat and tried again. "Okay. I'll do it."

The relief on Taylor's face was palpable, but it did little to ease the ache in Leia's chest. She felt as if she was agreeing to tear herself in two, to live a lie that went against everything she believed in.

"Thank you, Leia," Tree said, her tone professional but with a hint of genuine gratitude. "I know this isn't easy, but it's the best course of action for everyone involved."

Leia remained silent, her gaze fixed on a point somewhere beyond her screen. She could feel the concerned looks from Adrian and Riven, but couldn't bring herself to meet their eyes. The enormity of what she had just agreed to was starting to sink in, leaving her feeling numb and disconnected.

Riven, sensing her distress, cleared his throat.

"Tree, why don't we discuss the details later? I'll give you a call this afternoon to go over everything in more depth. For now, I think it's best if we all take some time to decompress."

Tree nodded, already reaching for her phone. "Of course. I'll be in touch."

As the call ended and the faces disappeared from her screen, Leia sat back in her chair, feeling drained and conflicted. She glanced at her phone, half expecting to see a message from Taylor, but the screen remained dark.

Outside her window, the first light of dawn was breaking over the city skyline. Leia watched as the golden rays slowly painted the buildings, transforming the urban landscape. She couldn't help but wonder how something so beautiful could exist in a world that sometimes felt so cruel and complicated.

Three months into 2017, and suddenly things weren't seeming as great as she'd thought.

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fun fact: comments actually motivate me to update faster :) pls don't be a silent reader <3

let me know what you think is gonna happen next! i've planned out the whole story but always fun to hear what others think hehe