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I sat beside her and caressed her hairs while saying softly," We need to apply this paste now baby" 

She did not looked at me and I find that strange. I again caressed her hairs and said," Mahroo" 

No response again. 

I noticed trail of tears rolling down her eye and my heart clenched at the sight. I cupped her face in my palms while asking," Why are you crying baby, are you feeling pain anywhere? Tell me?"

She finally looked at me with her tears eyes and hiccupped while saying," My whole body became so ugly." 

And with this she cried miserably. I sat there frozen. She must not have seen herself before this and now she has, she is feeling repulsed by herself. 

How painful it must be for her to witness this and bear this. I felt my eyes moist and lowered myself to kiss her forehead who was crying badly.

I gulped my emotions and said," You are not ugly jaan, its just for some time and they will get cured as well" 

She shook her head and cried," I know they will not go easily, I know I look so ugly."

My heart felt so heavy listening to her crying voice and I tried to coax her saying," No.." She did not let me complete and pointed toward the mirror that was aligned to out bed and we can see clearly in that. 

She hiccupped while saying," Look at my face shahenshah, so much marks and so ugly" I shook my head and she uncovered herself from the blanket harshly while saying," Look, all my whole body is ugly. Very ugly." She sobbed while telling me and tears spilled from my eyes looking at her loosing the hope.

I pulled her up from her shoulders and hugged her tightly. She cried loudly in my embrace and tears flowed from my eyes silently. 

I never thought this to be so hard. 

I controlled myself and whispered to her," Everything is going to be fine bacha, don't loose hope. And you are beautiful. You were beautiful for me and you will remain the most beautiful girl in the whole world for me for ever. No one is more beautiful than you. No one have this innocence, no one have this soft heart. No one have this sharp brain and no one have the bravery you possess. No one is like you and can never be. Don't feel low because of physical appearance jaan, the beauty that matters is of heart and soul and I know my baby's soul is the most beautiful one."

"And you still look beautiful, even more to me now, because I know you fight with the demons to get back to me, for me only. You beat the poison to come back to me. These marks are singing the story of your fight that you fought so bravely. I am so proud of you. Never feel low about yourself. Just look at you with my eyes and you will get to know how divine you are, how beautiful you are, how amazing you are" I finished and she looked at me with her teary eyes while saying,

"Aap ab bhi hamse prem karte hain?"

"You still love me?"

I smiled while washing her tears and kissed her cheek while saying," Pehle se bhi jyada"

" More than before."

She again sobbed in my arms and I realized we need to apply paste on her body as well.

 I looked at her and said," Paste?" She nodded being timid again when she noticed she was again bare. 

I softly roll her on her side to apply paste on her back. I spread the cloth on the bed in which she need to be covered after. I begin to apply the paste on her shoulders when she spoke," Shahenshah I know you will get disgusted by looking at all these ugly scars, please don't..."

I felt the vulnerability in her voice, the depth of her pain and I could not stop myself from kissing the scar on which I was about to apply the paste. 

She squirmed and I whispered," I can never feel disgusted by you mahroo. I worship you. You have the highest place in my heart and the matter of these scars, tell me if I kiss each of it then  will you believe that I am not a bit repulsed by them? Hmm?" 

"How can you shahenshah, I can not see my whole body without feeling disgusted, how can you not?" She said while choking on her tears. 

"Okay, let me prove you that I love you, as you are, be it with these scars or without and I am not a bit affected by them because I can see your pure soul, I can see your beautiful heart and these scars does not matter to me." I said and kissed the another one that was between her both shoulders. 

She sucked a deep breath while I applied the paste gently on the scar that I kissed. She said still crying," Don't do it please." 

And I kissed the another one while saying," You can not stop me from loving my beautiful wife, mahroo" With that I kissed her whole back and legs as well, wherever the scars were and applied paste as well while she keep sobbing softly.

I pushed her on her back.

"I am not beautiful anymore" 

She again wailed and I kissed her lips hard, sucking the life out of her in anger. Her constant degrading comments about my wife were making me raged and all the anger poured out in ferocious kiss where I dominated and did not let her take a single particle of air in. I bit her lip and she groaned in pain while parting her mouth. My tongue invaded her mouth with a force and intensity that she shook beneath me. After punishing her to my heart's content I scolded her while panting,

"I will not tolerate any bad word about my wife, get that?" 

She looked at me with hazy eyes and shocked face. She was panting still. I have never been this rough while kissing her but she just made me loose my control in anger and I end up eating her mouth.

I gently kissed her face where the scars were and applied the paste afterward. She squirm under my soft pecks when I kissed her beautiful breasts and clutched my hand tightly. Her beautiful curves got goosebumps and the little bud got hardened instantly. 

I could not stop myself from leaning in and I sucked on it softly. 

"Ahhh" She moaned and I went insane after that. I sucked it again and she moaned again. She is not fine to do such things now. I averted my gaze and kissed the other one instantly. It was hard and want my attention so I gave.

I moved down and kissed her stomach, she sucked her breath in to avoid the contact but I kissed anyway. 

Diverting her attention from the worst things she is thinking about her is the must to do thing now other wise I will lost her to darkness from where she never be able to come out. 

I moved further down and breathed on her thighs. She trembled and instantly held my face with her hands while looking at me shocked. I kissed her thigh maintaining the eye contact and she moaned still looking in my eyes," Ahhh"

I smirked a little and kissed her thigh once again. Her head fell back and her grip on my face loosened. I continue to kiss her and apply paste while she continue to moan softly. 

How badly I want her to be healthy right now is known to my heart only.

I want to make love to her in my way. 

I want to cherish her.

I want to worship her.

Soon I end up applying the paste on her whole body and picked the ends of the cloth and tie the strings. There were total 6 strings. There were strings that need to be tie above her shoulders as well. I did and now she was covered with a soft, pink coloured loose cloth with her arms bare and it end till her knees. 

"Hope I proved how much I love my wife"

I kissed her forehead once I was done and get off the bed. I moved toward the dressing table only to grab the bottle of vermilion. I went back to her and she looked at me with questionable gaze.

 I smiled at her and showed her the vermilion bottle while saying dramatically," I want to prove my authority on you"

She giggled a bit and I applied  the vermillion and said," Hmm now you look mine, completely" 

I kissed both her cheeks again and she reciprocated the kiss. I feel so loved when she kiss me. 

I lay down with her while snuggling closer to her, I wrapped my arms around her while snuggling my face in her breast while she slid her hands in my hair, caressing them. 

I feel so content and calm when ever she do this. I keep laying in her arms feeling her warmth and love for me.

 I need this so much to feed my deprive heart. 

I longed for her for one whole month and now that she is awake again, I don't want to be away from her. I need to calm my deprived nerves. She keep on playing with my hairs unknowingly giving me feeling of pure bliss.

I opened my eyes and found her looking at me. 

"Slept well?" She asked me and I realized that I slept in her embrace. I nodded snuggling closer to her and she sucked a deep breath. I smiled knowingly. 

After laying for some more time I glanced at her and kissed her lips making her timid. I untangled myself from her and drink some water when I remembered that I have planned something for her. 

I looked at her and said," I have something for you mahroo"

She looked at me with squinted gaze and asked," What shahenshah?"

"Not like this, let me take you there" I said smiling widely and picked her up in my arms. She protested a bit while saying," But I am not in presentable condition shahenshah" 

"Relax, it does not matter." I said and moved out in the garden attached to out chamber and her eyes widened looking at the preparations.

She looked at me and soon a beautiful smile came on her lips as she said," This is so beautiful shahenshah" 

I smiled and observed everything. She is fond of butterflies and jugnus so I especially asked the soldiers to collect the butterflies and jugnus in jars and they bring them here and freed them in the garden, now the garden was looking so lovely with twinkling jugnus and lots of butterflies of different colours and sizes.

I ordered to bring the rose flowers as she liked the most and whole decoration was being done with roses only. Somewhere the leaves and somewhere the flowers were placed. Small firesticks were used to give it a cozy feeling and warmth.

She beamed with joy looking at everything of her liking. 

I then took her to the corner where the mattress was placed, decorated beautifully as well. There were different types of cuisines were placed but only those which were healthy for her. Jalebis and ghewar was exception because she like them dearly. 

And the same she reacted. 

I settled her on my lap and she impatiently opened the lids of few containers and beamed with joy looking at ghewar in one of them. She hugged me tightly while saying," Thank you thank you thank you shahenshah"

I chuckled at her feel so glad looking at her all happy. She talked to animatedly as she do and we had the dinner together after so long. I feed her the first bite as usual and she did same to me. 

She was so happy looking her everything. 

I then clapped and her attendees came with a plate covered with red cloth. 

She instantly turned timid looking at her and ducked her head down with rosy cheeks. The attendee left as soon as she picked the plates of food.

I tucked my fingers below her chin and made her look at me. I kissed her nose and said," A small gift from my side on our anniversary"

She uncovered the plate and a wide smile appeared on her face looking at anklets and waist chain.

 She looked at me while saying," Why these only?"

"Because I love them on you, I love their sound when you walk." I replied in a heartbeat and she smiled timidly. 

She picked up the diary I put below them and asked," And why this?"

"When you were not talking to me then these pages became my companion. They provided me warmth of yours, love of yours and helped me to stay sane. I read your diary that you wrote when I was away and now I want to you to write diary daily. I want to read about myself. I want to know the depth of your affection for me through your writing." I replied and she cupped my face in her small hands while saying,

" Why shahenshah, I am here now. I will tell you all the things by myself. I will tell you how much you are dear to me by my words and my actions. I will provide you the warmth and love. I don't think you need the diary anymore when I am here" She said and my heartbeats raced while listening to her.

She definitely don't know what she has said. How can she speak so beautifully! 

I was head over heel for her already and now her love filled words are making me insane for her. 

And she keep looking at me for some time before she leaned in and attached her lips with mine. 

I died there.

How can she kiss me after saying such things to me!

I could not respond for a while and to add more to my already fucked up state she bit my lower lip still kissing me and I went crazy.

I took the charge and my one hand disappeared in her long raven locks and other hand begin to caress her thigh. I eat her mouth passionately and she shivered when I sucked her tongue while caressing her thighs closer to her flower. 

The world seemed blurred and it was just her for me, for now and for ever.

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