It was the blinding light. Or maybe it was her lack of focus on anything else but the stage and the agenda file. Whatever it was, it made her oblivious to her surroundings and when she finally looked straight ahead, she forgot to look away.

Mr. Raza's rambling was a background noise. The eyes of other people around didn't even register with her. She stood straight, rooted to her spot and kept on looking at the person standing at some distance of mere feet.

All those years, even in hindsight, even as a possibility, Elaf never let herself envision this moment. She never thought it was something for her. It was too good to be true.

So now, when she was standing in this very moment, she didn't know what to do or say. She just kept on looking, getting her fill. Of him. Of his face. Filling the crevices of her memory where he was vivid but in a bygone detail, something that had passed and was no longer a part of him now.

Sarim was aware of the exact moment her eyes fell on him and then forgot to blink. He let his gaze linger on her. Years of longing and when you finally have the person you are so used to seeing in your dreams, the reality becomes so good that you start second guessing it.

This wasn't the Elaf he had seen in that hospital room all those years back. And he was pretty sure he wasn't the same Sarim for her as well.

She tucked her hair behind her ear.

Hair. Long strands which were coming out of her catcher. Gone was the shoulder length cut he was so used to seeing. Also gone were the baggy, and sometimes simple comfortable shirts and jeans. Clad in a long shirt and trousers with her shawl on her shoulder, she was not the Elaf Sarim was used to. But she was still Elaf.

Maybe.

Her eyes had left him and that's when the spell was broken. Mumbling her apologies to Raza, she almost fled the room and Sarim's gaze followed her till she was out of the door.

And without even trying a sigh left his mouth.

Relief? Dread? Anticipation?

Maye a mixture of everything.

But he had finally seen her.

After six long years.

_____

She didn't know how she reached her desk but the moment she did, she was surrounded by her colleagues.

"Did he scold you?"

Ali asked. He was talking about Raza sir but Elaf couldn't even place him. Her mind was too jumbled up with just one man and one name.

"He must be. He can never leave a chance of rebuking any of us. Nothing new."

Mahnoor added. She was relieved that finally the file was there with Raza and now they could breathe in peace.

"Did you see the new head though? How was he?"

Areej wasn't going to back down without getting any details about this new change, the anomaly in their monotonous routine.

"Changed."

Elaf mumbled in a daze. Areej raised an eyebrow. Elaf looked at her and then shook her head. She needed to be in control of whatever whirlwind of emotions was going through inside of her. This wasn't good. She couldn't just lose her sanity like this.

"I just returned the file to Raza sir."

She made it clear that she couldn't give any answers to Areej's questions and that was disappointing, for Areej at least. She huffed and nodding at Elaf sat in her seat.

Elaf looked down at the plain surface of her work desk and closed her eyes.

She wasn't dreaming. This was actually happening.

It was almost comical that the life altering changes that were lurking around both of them still couldn't hide them from each others' eyes. He knew it was her and she knew it was him.

He was there in his Head of the wing glory, something now that she thought with a somewhat calm mind, wasn't that much of an absurdity. He was always best at his work, knew the procedures and was excellent in whatever he got his hands into.

And she was where everyone had always told her she'd be. Working a desk job and being a junior in the team.

The contrasts between them were stark but for a moment, tiny, infinitesimal and barely there moment.

She let herself just think of both of them as just Elaf and Sarim.

Who had run into each other after six long years with all the said and unsaid and delays and missed chances and stolen glances.

And just like that the moment was over.

Elaf straightened up in her seat and settled her hair to make herself look presentable and not shaken at all.

She could do this. Facades had always been her good friends. Then on stage and now in this running life. She'd do just fine.

But she forgot that the person she was going to put this facade on always saw through her every mask. Both on stage and both off.

The voices coming from the conference hall was an indication that it was over. Elaf dug herself some more into her seat and looked straight at the computer screen in front of her. The sound of footsteps and chatter was growing louder. Mahnoor, Ali and Areej were already sitting alert at their stations. The entrance soon opened and Mr. Raza and the team came inside talking all the while.

The head was silent though. Elaf hadn't looked up but she knew he was just observing. His gaze was around but mostly around her.

Mr. Raza was talking about this team of his and all of them were putting on a humble face. Even though Ali and Mahnoor were offended by how Raza was making this about himself instead of them when they were behind the hard work. But that was Raza for you.

All this time, Elaf made herself look as busy as she could. And no one called her out on that. She was usually this way as well. Keeping to herself and not leaning away from her work. The team was almost at the end of the room and few of them had already gone out of the door when Elaf sighed and looked up.

Only to get startled because he was looking right at her. He paused. She blinked. His eyes narrowed and she gulped. And then he was gone.

And she knew she wasn't going up this façade for long.

____

Even though he hadn't been around for years, what Sarim never forgot was the hustle of Karachi and its traffic. He used to curse it. There was nothing to glorify about it but it was the most telling sign of his home city and whenever he visited back home, he would get the instant feel of Karachi the moment he would be on the road.

But right now, driving through the same roads, with city lights falling through the windshield, he didn't stop to admire the beauty of this city through all its blemishes. He was way too occupied for that.

Today was eventful. To say the least.

Who would've told him that a very normal day at the office would turn into this.

Turn into him running into the one person he had never thought he'd find so randomly.

He had never thought of this possibility. It was painful. Something that would always remind him of how everything had panned out. How they could be so much and there they were. Nothing even though she was somehow everything he had ever wanted.

And even the tiny recess of his mind allowed him to think it through, the barely there chance of maybe running into her, he had never thought it would be as random as what happened today at the office.

She was there right in front of him and he just stared. Shocked. Startled. Confused.

The initial shock had worn off the moment Elaf had left the conference hall. His sharp mind started working as he listened to Raza and his pathetic attempts at covering the haphazard work he had done over the years.

There were theories in his mind of how Elaf was here but nothing seemed to click and at the end it dawned on him that he didn't even know much. His friends never really talked about her when he was there in the states. Their reasons made sense to him too. Elaf was a sore subject of his life and they didn't want to give him any worry when he already had his plate full in a new place and new country. He never explicitly asked them about her. Afraid of finding out something that would break his already broken heart but now he wondered if he did right? Also, he was sure that they also didn't know much. He was sure about Hesham and Izaan because if anything, they would've told him. And Safwa's case was altogether different. He knew for a fact that she and Elaf were as lost with each other as Elaf was with the rest of them.

But now she was there. In his reach and he would be damned if he didn't try knowing what was the deal with her. Before anything else, they were friends and as a friend he deserved to know that.

He also deserved to know that as someone who spent the six years of his life pining after her even though it was of no use. It was more for his own peace of mind, something to hold on to or letting go entirely. This unsaid between them couldn't go for another six years. No.

They'd have to talk. Like adults. They weren't the same kids anymore.

____

Yusra heard the main door opening and looked through the kitchen window. As expected, the person coming inside was Elaf. Yusra heaved a sigh of relief.

This new place was different from their old area. Jauhar was a pretty neat neighborhood but the same couldn't be said about Nazimabad. Especially when she had a daughter who had a 9-5 job and commuted alone. Daud's illness had made things pretty different and difficult. Yusra would be on edge until Elaf returned home and only then she'd be at peace.

Elaf had a habit of stopping by her parents and then going to her room to freshen up. But today she mumbled a greeting and was in her room the next moment. Yusra found it out of the norm but didn't say anything.

Elaf closed the door and stood in the middle of her room. It lacked the artistic touch the old one had. But that was about the Elaf who had dreams in her eyes and this was about the Elaf who was fighting everyday to make it through the day without crumbling.

She never let it show though. Not one frown in her perfect closed off demeanor.

But today the first fissure had formed and the reason was the person Elaf hadn't, even her wildest dreams, thought of running into.

Sarim Haider.

When they moved back to Karachi some six months back, Elaf had an idea that no matter the vastness of this city, she'd stumble upon people she left in her past. Maybe Hesham or Izaan. Safwa too. Marva or Rabea, Mishal?

But she never thought her past world would collide with her present misery and that too in the form of Sarim Haider. He had left the country the last she knew.

Elaf ran a hand through her hair. Her composure was crumbling because she was scared of the reality of her life coming in front of him but also, she was oddly relieved.

She missed him.

She missed him so much.

And she knew he had the power to walk through all her defenses and see every scar she tried her best to hide.

She didn't want that.

But she wanted that.

A muffled groan left her mouth.

What would she tell him? That she was exactly the idiot he always warned her not to be. That in her attempt of being a good daughter, she was left with nothing good in her life. That she approached the situation blindly, running amuck and not even stopping to see sense. That she didn't give her own father the margin of being a human and herself the benefit of being more than her father's daughter.

And the sob story of the past six years. The struggles. He could see that for himself. The difference in their sittings in their career lines was telling.

She didn't want him to pity her. Or worse try getting her life on the right track for her. This wasn't his responsibility and surely, it wasn't his baggage to deal with.

She'd have to draw the line and make sure to keep it intact. He deserved much better than to clear the mess of someone who told him she didn't want to see him when he had just put forward the truth about her own reality.

He deserved so much better than someone who'd return his hoodie because she was a coward.

Opening the tab in the bathroom, she splashed the cold water on her face and then looked at herself in the mirror.

He deserved better.

And that's what she deserved.

____

Safwa was getting the hang of the fact that her new coffee house was slowly turning into what Granna's was for her group of friends. It was a refreshing thought, something that filled her with so much happiness, genuine happiness to speak of, not the semblance of this emotion she often used to feel.

Hesham was a regular by now. He'd visit almost everyday. His excuse was the macaroons that he loved but Safwa knew he just loved the place and whatever it brought in the form of memories.

Sarim came once with Irma and Zimal and then he got lost in the busy world of his work. But he told her the coffee was so good he'd like to stop by just for that and he did. More than often.

Izaan didn't look back after the inauguration day but that was a given. Safwa didn't expect him to just barge in there whenever he needed to. But that's the thing with Izaan Shoaib, he was full of surprises.

He visited again, ordered his usual and then left silently. But Safwa always knew whenever he was here. He'd come in the evening or late night and Safwa's evenings were dedicated to the coffee house only. She stretched her usual open hours one more time for him, knowing well that he had just come after getting done with a surgery. The same understanding which was the crux of their relationship back in time. It was almost sad how things never remain the same but whatever makes them, it leaves a mark.

She wasn't expecting what happened tonight though. She was there at the counter when Hesham entered inside. Safwa gave him a huge smile which turned into a raised eyebrow seeing Sarim right behind him. And not long after that Izaan was there as well.

It was almost close to the finishing hour so there weren't many people around. They took the same table they were used to at Granna's and once Safwa had taken care of everything at the counter, she joined them. Talks flew, mostly on Hesham and Safwa's part. Izaan never spoke much anyway and tonight Sarim also was uncharacteristically quiet.

"Safwa."

They were silently enjoying the music in the background after Hesham had narrated a morbidly funny story about one of his cases when Sarim spoke. Safwa looked at him. The rest of the two were also attentive.

"Did you ever contact Elaf? After I was gone."

Safwa hadn't expected him to straight out ask this. Elaf wasn't someone even she and Hesham talked about often and they talked about everything. It was a deliberate try but whenever they'd be around Sarim, during videos or conference calls, they'd specially avoid even mentioning her. He never probed them for anything about her and that was their cue that he appreciated their silence over the matter but tonight, his body language was already different and now he was asking about Elaf.

Safwa leaned into her seat and nodded. He himself was asking about this, which he had never done the past six years. Good thing they were going to talk about it because Safwa was tired of not getting the outlet to release this pain over the matter. It was better to talk it out than to let it consume them from within.

"For a matter of fact, I did."

The guys were looking at her. She picked at her nail looking at nothing in particular.

"I wanted to reach out, you know. We were best friends and I wanted to be there for her and have her as my support system just like old times. She couldn't visit because you know the people she was living with and I didn't want to go there, to the Durrani House. I thought let's forget it. It's about Elaf. I will just meet her and come back. So I texted. Asked her if I could come over. Never got a reply. Tried calling but it never connected."

She was still playing with her fingers. They could tell there was more to this and were listening intently to know.

"I still went there. I was maybe desperate because I was just so lonely. And I knew that she didn't have it easy as well. So I pushed every thought out of my system and drove there to Durrani House."

Her face showed disappointment before she continued.

"Ran into that jerk on the patio. What was his name? Ruman. Yeah. That one. He asked me what I was doing there and I told him that I wanted to meet Elaf. He laughed in my face. Told me that I should give up. Elaf had better things to worry about than keeping up with her snob friends. That's what he called me. He also very politely asked me to get out and never come again because Elaf wasn't going to keep in touch with me. And that's how I got insulted just because I wanted to meet my best friend. I never tried again. Didn't see any point."

She became silent. There was no denying that Safwa was a sweetheart for her friends but she was a Kirmani and someone who never accepted insults well. It was no surprise that she never looked back even though she missed Elaf so much.

"Why'd you ask? After all this time?"

Sarim shook his head.

"No reason. It's not a taboo we can't talk about."

"I always wanted to tell you because I felt that you deserved to know but you were out there making a life for yourself and I didn't sit right with me to tell you that there was no way to reach her now. I just thought that it should stay with me."

It made sense and Sarim was once again in awe of how wonderful friend Safwa was. She could share this bit with all of them but she in a way saved both Sarim and Elaf. Sarim from the implication of what Ruman had tried telling Safwa, that now Elaf belonged to him and she saved Elaf from her friends being more disappointed in her choices.

They dropped the topic after that. It was late and they were ready to leave. Hesham was with Safwa as they helped Nabeel winding up the closing when Sarim felt Izaan standing close to him leaning against his car.

"Everything's okay?"

Sarim looked ahead. Safwa and Hesham were ready to leave.

"Hopefully."

Izaan nodded and Sarim didn't miss his eyes following Safwa as she sat inside her car.

"Everything's okay at your end?"

Izaan shook his head and smiled. The same melancholic smile which was now a part of his life.

"Hopefully."

He patted Sarim's arm and went towards his parking spot. Sarim stood there. His mind was trying to join the dots but he was coming empty handed.

It was only fitting if the person in question herself told him what the hell had happened.

_____

Putting the cuff of the sphygmomanometer, Izaan smiled at Abba as he collected his things.

"You look relaxed today and your blood pressure reading is also telling of it. Good going, Abba."

Kamran Ansari shrugged his shoulders but the smile didn't leave his face.

"Nothing a good place with good company can't do."

Izaan's smile deepened. He knew what Abba was talking about. But he didn't say anything.

"Abba is absolutely right. Safwa has outdone herself. That place is so cozy."

Memoona added as she entered the room with Abba's breakfast.

"And don't forget the collection of books she had there on the shelves. And the music was good. 90's charm. It had Safwa written all over it, that place. Food being nice was already a given."

Memoona nodded along as she placed the tray on the table in front of Abba. She momentarily looked at Izaan.

"Did you visit?"

It was a trick question. His family, especially his mother and grandfather tended to do that a lot. Just to know if the string connecting him and Safwa was still there. They were subtle but Izaan always read right through them.

They should know that string was never getting severed. It was maybe the thread holding him together.

"I did."

Memoona raised an eyebrow but looked relieved.

"I'm off now. Abba, take care and Amma, don't forget his after lunch medicine."

They both nodded at that and saw him leaving the room. Kamran Ansari's smile had faltered. Memoona felt it too. The shift in the room.

"Life didn't do just with these two kids, Memoona."

He mumbled. His breakfast was forgotten.

"They fit like a glove together. And even the years between them couldn't do much to make their love a forgotten thing of the past. It's sad, seeing them apart like this."

Memoona felt her eyes welling up. The fate Izaan and Safwa had even though they had no role to play in it, often broke her heart. Their family hadn't broken the bond they had with Safwa and Izaan was right in front of their eyes most of the time. They were the witness of how love had never left them. They had left each other though. It was heartbreaking seeing the longing they both still felt.

"Izaan didn't deserve this. Neither did Safwa. Both of them had to pay for the choices others made. Izaan left Safwa but was it his own choice? Never."

Abba's voice used to bobble whenever he talked about them. Izaan was his pride and Safwa was the daughter he loved to bits. Seeing them both being where they were due to what others chose for them was painful.

"Ibsam is also my grandson and I still love him with all his imperfections. But it was bold of him to complain that he never got as much freedom and free reins to do whatever he wanted to do in this house. You know who never got to do that? Izaan. Ibsam chose his life by his rules, without even caring how it would affect his family. Izaan lost the one person he had reached out to love and cherish forgetting all his inhibitions. This isn't right, Memoona. This is unjust to Izaan."

He was right and he had often tried telling that to Izaan but Izaan helf the baggage of Ibsam leaving to the extent that he never thought that in this whole fiasco, he was the one who had lost the most.

"It's my wish to see my boy happy before I die."

"Abba! Don't talk like this."

"It's inevitable, Memoona. Life is short. Happiness is shorter. Izaan has wasted so much of his and Safwa's years and we just stood by the sides watching them. We couldn't stop Ibsam. What could we even do as elders?"

Memoona had thought about this a lot too. How their role as elders was meager in this whole setting. But then she got reminded of how it was always about the choices. They could never impose theirs on the kids. They could make them see sense and that alone wasn't easy because in their situation no one was wrong. At their place everyone was right and that made this whole situation one twisted labyrinth.

She had tried talking to Izaan but his fears were genuine. She even asked Safwa to move on but she just smiled and looked away. And Ibsam, he was as out of the picture as he was years back after making his choices.

You can't right the wrongs for someone if they don't want to do that themselves.

_____

Maneuvering his way through the route leading to the hospital, Izaan focused on the way ahead but his mind was constantly reminding him of the conversation they had the other night. When Sarim asked Safwa about Elaf.

She'd said she was so alone.

And he couldn't help feeling it was all his doing.

It was. He was the one to turn away from their relationship.

It was a fair decision that time. Not exactly a choice he wanted to make but he also didn't want Safwa to stagger along him on a journey that was longer than they'd thought.

He had a family which was broken. A career where he had to work through his sweat and pain to reach somewhere. He wanted to be on his own.

It was a lot.

And it was unfair on his part to keep Safwa through this even when she had half of these things sorted. She didn't deserve to suffer through everything he had over the years. It wasn't her fault and it was definitely not her shit to take care of.

He had seen her, growing into the successful woman that she was today. She had seen her making choices and sticking to them.

Would it be easy for her to be where she was if Izaan was in the picture with all his issues and mess?

He didn't think so. He wasn't used to being a nuisance and that to Safwa? That was impossible.

She was succeeding in every way and Izaan couldn't be prouder of where she had reached.

Him in the picture or not didn't matter much.

But she was so alone and he couldn't help wanting to reach out.

He was alone too.

But he had a family, broken but a loving family and she had just Nusrat Aapa and Hesham. Her relation with Phupho had taken a turn Izaan never wanted it to take and somehow he was responsible for that as well.

Sometimes he used to question why he told her that he was never moving on from her. It was the truth. She was the only woman he loved with all his might and she would remain so. For a long time or maybe even after that. Maybe if he hadn't told her that she'd be willing to move on, get settled in her life somewhere and be happy.

But would he be able to live through that? He was strong but he doubted if he was that strong. He was just a human after all.

But they were nowhere and it was a possibility. He knew Safwa but he also knew he was making her wait without even promising anything. For how long could she stay?

She was also just a human and she needed someone who wasn't stuck up in so much even though loving her was the only bright thing in his life.

The same terrain of thoughts and the same ending point.

Nothing and everything.

Izaan sighed as he came out of his car and came straight to the reception desk in the surgery ward. His juniors were already present there and were ready with their clipboard to take patient history, a crucial step for a surgeon. He looked around. Only two patients there were his but he knew the history of rest as well. This was what his supervisor always told him. When you're a doctor, the whole ward of yours is your responsibility. He was talking with one of the Juniors when he saw Roshna standing close to the reception desk. He raised an eyebrow in her direction and she shrugged.

"What are you doing here?"

He asked as he reached her side. She looked exhausted, must be the after effects of a night duty.

Roshna pushed her hands in the pocket of her coat.

"Kumail's unwell again."

"Headache?"

He asked and she nodded. For the last few months Kumail had started getting these random headaches and even though he thought of them as mild body fluctuations, Izaan and Roshna were concerned. But Kumail was Kumail. He absolutely refused to reach out to anyone for a mere headache.

"I'm thinking of getting Dr. Imran's opinion this time around."

Dr. Imran was the most competent neurologist in the hospital. Izaan looked mildly concerned but he didn't show it.

"Do it but I think it's probably nothing."

"I hope so too. I just want to be on the safer side."

Her voice was calm and telling that she just wanted to get the doubt out of her system. They were doctors and understood these matters more closely.

Roshna gave him a smile and walked out of there towards the On-Call room where Kumail probably was getting some rest.

Izaan's eyes followed Roshna with worry lines on her forehead. But then he shook his head.

For doctors, they were getting too worked up. It was probably nothing.

_______

When Elaf got off the bus this morning, she had only one agenda on her mind.

Ignore the head of the manufacturing wing at all costs.

It was going to be easy, she thought. His office was there in the main building and yesterday he had gotten all the documentation from Raza Sir so there was no need for him to be here today.

Wrong.

She understood it the moment she reached her work station. The whole office was on alert mode and that only meant he was here today.

Again.

She didn't let it dampen her very high spirits of ignoring him. But it seemed like she woke up on the wrong side of the bed today and he was on the right, because when Raza Sir entered their workplace and came straight to her desk, she knew whatever he was going to say, she'd hate it.

"You, Elaf."

He started handing a file to her.

"I need someone the most competent from my team to go and give this to him. He will ask questions and I highly doubt the rest can answer those."

Elaf scowled, not liking his tone. Each member of her team worked better than him anyway.

"Why don't you go yourself then?"

She asked with the sole intention of getting him off her back but seemed like her tone didn't sit well with her. He glared at her and raised his finger in her direction.

"Girl, do you need this job or not?"

Oh she did. She very much did.

But she didn't want to go and stand before Sarim Freaking Haider.

The old age annoyance which she had totally forgotten was once a part of her whole persona simmered underneath her skin. She was pissed. This was entirely against her plan but whenever, in the last six years her plans had ever worked?

She walked out of there and walked around the corner. Mr. Raza's cabin was where he sat. Elaf could see from the glass windows. She sighed.

She wasn't ready for this.

Heck, she was avoiding this only.

Balling her fists at her sides she prepared herself for the inevitable.

Who sat in the chair behind the mahogany desk.

Knocking at the door she waited for him to give her a cue to enter inside.

He didn't take long.

She took deft steps without even looking at his face and placed the file in front of him.

That's when he looked up straight at her face. His coat was hanging on the back of his chair. He was dressed as formally as he could.

Elaf could see the contrast between his appearance. Which spoke of the change in him. He opened the file. The documents were compiled by her only. The main reason why Raza had sent her here.

He pointed towards the chair. Elaf wanted to decline. But this wasn't an assignment discussion as class fellows. It was a boss employee meeting.

She sat down.

For a while there was just silence. He was reading the file occasionally glancing at her and she was looking anywhere but him.

"So, Mrs. Elaf."

Elaf gave him the meanest scowl she could manage. The audacity.

"Miss."

She corrected curtly and her internal exasperation increased seeing the smirk he had thrown her way.

"I'm sorry. My Bad."

He wasn't sorry. Elaf knew him that much.

"You've been working here for six months if I'm not wrong."

Elaf nodded, on edge. She hoped his information was limited to just that. She really hoped.

"Still, the work is pretty good."

"Thank you. Do you need any modifications?"

He leaned into his chair. His eyes never left her face.

"Yeah, for matter of fact, I do."

They weren't talking about the documents anymore.

"Do tell. So I can get to it right away."

"I think I'm gonna look thoroughly and then decide where the work is needed."

Yeah, definitely not talking about documents anymore. Elaf nodded and immediately got up. Her steps were quick. She didn't want to linger anymore. Because of....

"Elaf."

This.

She knew the tone. It wasn't a head calling a junior in the team.

It was someone you once thought the world of calling you out after ages.

She slowly turned around.

"Seriously? You wouldn't ask me how I am doing?"

Elaf gulped. And then shook her head.

"Why?"

"Because I can see you're doing pretty fine."

He chuckled.

"Outer appearances can often be deceptive."

"The differences never are."

"And what are those?"

"This."

She pointed between them. At one side of the table he was. And on the other end she stood.

"You're my boss."

"Technically, I'm not."

"Yeah, technically you're my boss' boss."

Her clipped tone made him scowl. He opened his mouth to say something when she shook her head.

"You know where we stand inside this office, Sarim. So, lets' just keep it at that. "

Pretend that they didn't know each other. Her demand made sense because Sarim knew how far the rumor mill could go. But she wasn't asking this just for this reason. There was more to it.

He saw her leaving the cabin and leaned against the chair.

His mind was already forming what he was going to do next.

_____

"Are you seriously in your senses? I mean you did spend a shit load of time abroad and people develop habits by just association you see. So you aren't high or anything? Not that I'm judging. Your life you are the boss but as your best friend and potential best man..."

Sarim kicked Hesham at the side earning a yelp.

"Do I look high to you?"

Hesham kept on staring at him and then shrugged his shoulders.

"Tomato-tomato."

Sarim glared at him.

"Just tell me if you can do this or not."

"I can. Don't doubt my abilities and sources but what is the need? Ruman was an ugly fuck why you want to know his whereabouts?"

Sarim kept quiet. He was regretting asking help from this clown already.

He was a man on a mission but he also was a man in love and even before that he was a man who respected other people's choices.

Elaf had very subtly asked him to keep his distance in the office and he respected it. But that didn't mean he wasn't curious about this whole thing.

His trips to and from the second building were a regular thing now. Even if Elaf wasn't in the picture, he'd be this busy because the workload was divided between the two branches and he had to oversee everything.

But this gave him the chance to see her everyday, although from the sidelines.

She had changed.

A lot.

Not just appearance wise, but also in her attitude and her way of carrying herself. This was hinting at so much and Sarim didn't know how to approach her outside the confines of the office to know what was with her. She was ignoring him like a plague. He could've cornered her but that didn't feel right. He wanted her to be uncomfortable.

So this was his way of at least getting something out of the picture of a big question mark. He was sure Elaf wasn't staying at Durrani House. Nothing was telling of that. Then where was Ruman in her life? According to Safwa he had insulted her the last time she went to see Elaf and if he was that controlling over her life then where was he now? Was he even in the picture?

Desperate times call for desperate measures and he was ready to do that. Hesham was going to see what was Ruman up to these days.

"This is exactly what I never wanted you to indulge in, Sarim."

Hesham muttered. Sarim looked at him sideways.

"What if she's happily married in her life? Not happily but married. This doesn't look good on you."

Sarim wanted to laugh at Hesham's serious face but he really appreciated how thoughtful his friend was.

But he wasn't doing this without giving it a thought. It was the safest bet. He wouldn't make Elaf uncomfortable and would know what he wanted to know as well.

Which was just the mere knowledge that if the Durranis and especially Ruman was out of her life.

She wasn't married. The way she vehemently emphasized that the other day. The memory made him chuckle.

He just wanted to clear a few things and then he would be at peace.

And onto the other thing.

Which was to make Elaf Daud talk to him and no, the occasional yes and okays didn't count.

"I know what I am doing, Hesham."

He assured his still skeptical friend and took a sip of his coffee.

______

The dinner to welcome the new head was something which totally skipped Elaf's mind. She had, of course, done her best to skip but it was more of a workplace politics at work than anything else. Mr. Raza had already given Sarim a pathetic first impression and now he was doing everything in his wake to be in Sarim's good books. Elaf could assure him that this wasn't going to work but then how would she explain how she'd know that? So she kept quiet. He wanted his whole team to be there to make it as welcoming as possible.

Elaf sighed looking at the time on her phone while sitting at the far edge of the venue. The dinner had just concluded and she was relieved that anytime now, they'd be able to go back home.

Her eyes roamed around as she played with her hair. She kept them open as per the occasion. It was a habit formed over the past few years that she'd run her fingers through the strands whenever she was nervous and agitated, or deep in thoughts. She was doing the same right now.

Sarim had respected her request of keeping it professional and she was thankful for that. She had no doubts that he'd listen to her.

He always had.

So why wouldn't he now.

This was the first time in the past week that Elaf sat down and noticed him without having any other thought on her mind.

He was talking with a bunch of men double his age but the way they were listening to him and giving him appreciated nods, it filled her with respect and pride.

He was always going to shine and Elaf was happy that he got shine so bright. His way of handling the work had also left her impressed. He wasn't cruel, strict yes but he had genuine love for his work and complete honesty with it.

And he was more handsome than ever. This was something Elaf would never even admit to herself but he had grown up pretty nice. He was always easy on the eyes but now with everything else going, she could say that he was cleaning up more than fine.

But that was it. It ended just here. She knew sooner or later he would have questions. His patience would run out. She didn't know what she'd do then. Or how. But for now she was just sitting there, in the shadows, seeing him in the limelight.

Just like he had done during every play of hers.

Areej was going to drop her home because at this time, it wasn't wise to go on your own. The inside of the venue was warm so she had her shawl draped on the side of her shoulder. Her black dress was in perfect sync with the formal yet casual dinner.

She stood close to the glass window. It hid her some more from the prying eyes. The road outside was running. Elaf glanced at it and then again at the people around. No one was looking at her.

Except for him.

He was on a call and all the time his eyes were set on her. Elaf saw him nodding and then he ended it. She expected him to sit back and restart the conversation.

Didn't happen.

In fact he looked around and then started walking.

Towards her.

Elaf took more steps back till she was almost outside through the doors. The cold ran a shiver through her. She had always been sensitive towards cold.

He stood a few steps away from her. Elaf looked at him questionably. He looked serious.

"You asked me to keep it professional. In the confines of the office."

She didn't say anything. Just kept on looking.

"We aren't in the office, Elaf."

He took a step forward. She didn't move back.

"So, I'm not going to be professional."

He was close now. Their height difference was so evident.

"You left Durrani House six years back didn't you?"

She refused to say anything. She even refused to look up.

She hadn't cried much all these years. Not about anything she went through, her family went through.

She only cried when she remembered this same man standing in front of her.

So, how would she not cry right now?

She nodded. Her head was still bent.

"Ruman is married. And I for a fact know that that's not with you. What happened, Elaf. What happened with the engagement? What happened to you?"

Memories came rushing back. Engagement? The sham?

The scar just behind her nape.

The struggle.

The tears.

The futile attempts.

The failure.

She looked up at him. Sarim realized there that she had such beautiful eyes.

Which were right now trying their best to tell him something. Something she was unable to form in words.

The pain that he saw on her face made him immediately reach out. His hand traced the side of her cheek and slowly settled there. Her hair was colliding with his shoulder just the way they had that day years back on the seaside.

"The engagement. I broke it. And we haven't been in contact with the Durranis ever since."

Maybe it was the warmth of his palm. Maybe it was the cool of the outside air.

But she told him.

"And?"

And he understood it wasn't the whole truth. The more painful parts were yet to come.

"And.."

She stopped and then looked away. Sarim pursed his lips but not with annoyance but with determination.

"The dinner is over. Let's go."

Elaf gave him an alarming look but he just raised an eyebrow. His hand found hers and he started walking towards his car.

Never leaving her hand once. Elaf looked around. No one was there at this edge of the place.

She could easily make him leave her hand. She would just have to ask.

But she didn't.

Because for the first time in the six year long winter

She was warm.

_____

Author's Note:

A lil birthday treat from my side