requested: Nope
Headcanons: Ishimaru's mother is a B A D  M O T H E R, step-sibling Hagakure
Angst or fluff: Angst <3
prompt: I thought of an idea, then just started writing.
AU: No AU
Ship: None
WARNINGS: sad <3, mentions of su1c1d3, mentions of d34th, F slur, R slur.
POV: Noones.

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FORTY FUCKING FORTNIGHTS!

Ishimaru lays in his bed helpless and empty. It has only been what, 10 hours since his execution? It feels like forty fortnights without him.

Ishimaru cannot sleep. Especially when every time he closes his red, ruby eyes all he can see or hear is that horrible, brutal execution over and over and over...

I am an artist! Please God forgive me!

Ishimaru apologizes to Alter Ego, seeing it as the only way to properly say sorry for not stopping Mondo.

What he doesn't expect is a visualization of Mondo showing up saying it wasn't his fault, that he should escape for them, both Chihiro and Mondo.

I am an artist! Please don't revere me!

"Ya know man, I really admire ya for pushing through all this. Even though You don't really talk much... but at least you are eating, yeah?" Hagakure puts on his happy-go-lucky grin as Ishimaru finishes his third apple slice.

Ishimaru almost smiles back. But no, he has learnt his lesson already.

Mondo, one of his first ever friends died.

Chihiro, another friend he recently made died.

Not to mention all the fake friends who talked to him on a dare throughout his life.

He has learnt now that NEVER to befriend anyone. He does not want to hurt them.

So, he stares up at Hagakure with a blank, vacant look. Hagakure chuckles and hands him another apple slice. "Hey, maybe one day you'll be even better. And push past the butter incident!"

Ishimaru silently thanks Hagakure as he takes the slice. 

The butter incident sounds way better than Mondo's execution.

I am an artist! Please don't respect me!

"Ya know bro, I have a lot of respect for ya, getting through this killing game with a determined smile on ya face. Take a lot of courage." Mondo says lazily as they hang out just outside the sauna.

"Oh there is no need to respect me for something as trivial as that!" Ishimaru retorts.

"Oh really, how many other students here are keepin' their cool right now?" Mondo retaliates.

"I- well... if you are going to respect me, respect me for my hard work! Not simply being a leader in an... odd.. situation!" Ishimaru speaks.

"Yeah, okay then. I'll correct myself: I respect ya for yer hard work. Better?"

"Yes, very much!"

I am an artist! Feel free to correct me!

"Nothing can atone to my mistakes, so please hit me! Anyone! I cannot even call myself the ultimate moral compass for the things I have done!" Ishimaru yelled.

"Dude... no. Nobody is gonna hit ya! Like you said, it was a mistake!" Yasahiro comforted while patting Ishimaru's tense shoulder.

A self-centered artist!

Ishimaru slouches as he studies physics. He could be hanging out with a friend, taking his father out for a much needed break. But no, he needs to study. 

He needs to study and redeem his family name after all.

He does not want to be self-centered.

Self-obsessed artist!

Ishimaru doesn't like his mother. She calls him selfish and self-obsessed if he takes time for his mental health.

So he studies just like she wants him too.

One day his mother will be proud.

One day.

I am an artist!

I am an artist!

"It is my duty to punish others, as a moral compass!"

"Sorry, but as the ultimate moral compass you have to take this detention slip."

"As the ultimate moral compass, I must give you the appropriate punishment!"

These are words Ishimaru has recited by heart.

BUT IM JUST A KID!
IM JUST A KID!

Ishimaru, the normally firm and strict moral compass is shaking and sobbing. Why? His only friend was brutally executed and churned into butter.

He was only a kid. He did not mean to hurt Fujisaki. This just wasn't fair.

But of course, nothing is fair in this despair-inducing killing game.

Despair-inducing...

I guess you can say Monokuma succeeded in spreading despair that he oh so loves.

IM JUST A KID!

Nobody comforted poor Ishimaru other than his step sibling, Yasuhiro Hagakure. Yasuhiro gave his fruit in hopes of him eating.

"Hey man, we will get over this together alright? Nobody expects you to be over it in a couple days, okay? After all, you're still a kid."

Those words meant more then he could ever show. So he flops his head on Hagakures Shoulder in hopes it would convey how appreciative he is.

KID!

Ishimaru doesn't really remember his childhood.

Only the studying, and the torment.

Oh, and his mother's oh so helpful words.

"You sure are getting fat, Kiyotaka."

"Maybe if you studied more you wouldn't be such a retard!" (AUTHOR IS ND, I CAN TYPE IT)

"You don't want to be your grandfather do you!?"

"You're a fag!? I thought I raised you to not choose this lifestyle?!" (AUTHOR IS LGBT+)

And maybe I'll grow out of it...

Ishimaru walks into the labs equipment room.

Ishimaru doesn't notice the fanfic writer.

Ishimaru dies.

All that hard work, for nothing. 

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ART IS DEAD is one of my fav songs,

Kiyotaka is my fav character,

Why not make angst out of it?

I geniunely like this oneshot for whatever reason