Wooyoung's POV

I felt something soft pressed against my neck and I let out a soft breath as I leaned my head back, allowing more access. San's soft giggles chimed against my ear and I smiled, slipping my eyes open to look at him. I was laying on my back but he was laying on his front, half of his body leant on mine while his face hovered above me.

"Good morning Sweetheart," he said softly, brushing my hair back delicately from my forehead. I smiled and let out a yawn arching back slightly in a stretch.

"I can get used to this you know," I said quietly.

"Used to what," he asked me.

"To this. Waking up in the morning to your handsome face above me, to hear your voice. It's all so very domestic," I said as I lifted a hand and brushed it through San's hair.

"It is nice, though rare. These past few weeks have been nice, relaxing," San said with a sigh as he rolled onto his back beside me. The room of requirement has really come in handy lately. It's a good place to spend some uninterrupted time alone and it's also gives a bigger bed than the ones we have in our rooms. I sighed and rolled over, taking San's previous position. He smiled and slipped his hands behind his head as he watched me with a lazy smirk.

"Stop looking at me like that," I said with a huff.

"Like what," he questioned, the smirk not falling from his face.

"You know what. You're giving me that stupid little smirk that you know I think is really hot," I said with a pout.

"If it is stupid, then how can it be hot," he asked with a raised eyebrow. I chuckled and shook my head, leaning down and pressing my lips to his. His body relaxed at the action and he shifted, his hands moving to cup my face.

"I love you," I whispered as I pulled back slightly. I know San isn't at the point where he can say it back to me but that doesn't bother me. I love telling him though because his eyes always light up slightly and he just seems so happy. As usual, his eyes crinkled up in the corners and his dimples popped out. I smiled and ran my thumb over his face, skimming it over the top of his dimple. He wrapped his arms around my waist and tugged me down on top of him. I chuckled but relaxed and snuggled down, tucking my head into his neck.

"We should probably be getting up soon, we don't want to miss breakfast," he said quietly. I hummed but slipped my eyes closed. San's hand ran up and down my back gently, sending shivers up my spine and causing me to relax more. After a minute or two his hand shifted down more and slipped underneath my shirt. I tensed up slightly and his hand froze.

"Is this ok," he asked me. I let out a breath and nodded, untensing my muscles quickly. The only reason I tensed in the first place was because I wasn't expecting it. He trailed his fingertips up my spine lightly. I gasped in surprise, not expecting the sensation that shot through my body.

"Holy shit," I said softly.

"Holy shit in a good way or a bad way," San asked as he paused again, making me whine.

"Keep going, that feels so nice," I said quickly, nuzzling my head into his neck.

"Ok," he said quietly and continued his ministrations. I let out a sigh and closed my eyes once again.

"You know, if people could purr I think you would be purring right now," he said with a light chuckle.

"It feels so good," I mumbled.

"I'm glad. It makes me happy to know you are," he said softly, pressing a kiss to the top of my head.

"We do really need to get up though," he added.

"Why? Can't we just stay like this," I whined.

"Nope. Come on," San said as he sat up, subsequently drawing me up with him. I wrapped my arms around his neck and kept my head tucked down.

"We need to go to breakfast Wooyoung, you need to eat properly," San said and I rolled my eyes.

"You don't need to stress all the time about how much I eat," I said with a frown as I pulled back but remained in his lap.

"You once told me it wasn't my responsibility to look after you and to worry about and while I didn't believe it then, it's definitely not true now. I'm pretty sure as your boyfriend it's literally my duty to make sure you're ok," San said.

"First of all no, it's never your duty to do anything. Second of all, well, you don't have to worry about me so much," I said with a shrug.

"Duty or not, I want to make sure you're looking after yourself properly," San said softly, reaching out and brushing my hair back behind my ear. I appreciate how much he cares for me and though it can be annoying with him constantly telling me to eat and blah, blah. I don't have any problems with eating, I just don't eat as much as everyone. It's a good way to make sure your weight is monitored properly just like dad told me.

"Fine, let's go to breakfast so you can get away from me like you so desperately want," I said with an exaggerated sigh as I got up. San laughed and shook his head.

"No need to be so pouty," he said.

"Don't tell me what to do," I huffed, grabbing my clothes from the chest next to the bed.

"Okay Sweetheart," he said softly. I smiled softly and shook my head. He's surprisingly non-confrontational compared to how he's always been. I unbuttoned my sleeping shirt and slipped it off, grabbing my shirt for class and slipping it on. I glanced over at San while I buttoned up my shirt and smiled fondly.

"You know, I don't mind if you look at me, you are my boyfriend," I said as I walked back over. San turned back to me and shrugged and my stomach dropped slightly.

"U-Unless of course you don't want to. That's fine as well, there isn't much to loo-."

"We're taking things slow remember, and you said we need to communicate things. I figured it I'd wait for you to say it's ok before I do anything," San cut in quickly.

"Oh. Well, I don't mind. You don't have to look though, or no that sounds weird. Sorry, I don't even know what I'm saying right now, just forget about it," I said quickly. Now I'm just mindlessly talking.

"Hey, don't be so down on yourself all the time. Come here," San said, grabbing my waist gently and tugging me closer. I tilted my head down to look at him as he was still sitting on the bed.

"You don't ever need to stress about how you look with me ok because I think you're the most beautiful and handsome person I've ever met. And there is in fact something to look at, I just don't want to get all blushy and hot right now," he said softly as his hand slipped under my shirt, his thumb running over my stomach.

"How would you even know," I said, rolling my eyes.

"Because I've seen your stomach before right after you were telling me how hot my abs were and I turned into a blushing mess remember," he said with a chuckle and I flushed, remembering the moment he was talking about.

"I did not say they were hot, I said they were nice and you should give me some tips," I said with a pout.

"So, you're saying they aren't hot," he asked slowly.

"Oh my god, just get changed so we can go eat. You know, the thing you were worrying about so much a couple of minutes ago," I said as I whacked him in the back of the head. He chuckled but finally got up and went to grab his clothes, the both of us getting changed. I glanced over at him as I buttoned up my pants, running my eyes down his back as he grabbed his shirt. I've always known he has wide shoulders and I know he's got well defined abs but now I'm realising he has well defined muscles on his back too. He definitely works out and he works out well. He shifted slightly and I quickly looked away. I grabbed the tie and absentmindedly wrapped it around my neck while I made sure to keep my head turned away.

"Hey Wooyoung," San said, a teasing lit to his voice. I frowned and turned to face him while he fixed is collar with a small grin on his face.

"What," I asked in confusion.

"As much as I absolutely love that look, cos I really do, it looks amazing. But I'm gonna need that back cos I'm pretty sure it's a dead giveaway we spent the night together," San said. Huh?

"What are you talking about," I asked him.

"My tie. Green really does suit you but I think you'll prefer this one," he said, holding up his hand that had my Gryffindor tie hanging from it. I glanced down and groaned as I realised I had accidentally picked up San's tie and because I wasn't concentrating, I didn't notice.

"Shit, sorry," I said, hurriedly, loosening it and slipping it off my neck.

"I don't care Sweetheart, I love it on you. But I know it probably wouldn't be a good idea for you to go walking around with it. Thanks for tying it by the way," he said with a grin as we swapped ties and he put his over his head, tightening it properly.

"You're welcome," I chuckled, tying mine up. We both put on our robes and grabbed out wands, making sure we were presentable.

"Ready to go," he asked and I nodded so we both left the room and entered the halls. We had woken up relatively early so breakfast would have only started about 15 minutes ago.

"What classes do we have first," I asked.

"Uh, Herbology and Potions I think," San replied. Eh could be better but also could be worse. I've noticed lately in potions Yeosang has been sitting with San and helping him out, giving him directions and San has been listening to him. It makes me happy to see the two of them getting along so well.

"Well, well, well, what do we have here?" I glanced around and smiled as I saw Seonghwa and Hongjoong walking up.

"Hey guys," I said happily, bounding over and jumping at Seonghwa. He squeaked but his arms wrapped around my waist and held me up as I wrapped mine around his neck.

"Hi Wooyoung," he said softly as he placed me back down on the ground.

"Thank you for covering for us again, it really means a lot," I said. I still haven't found the courage to tell Yeosang and Yunho about San and I yet but I'm definitely going to do it soon. It's been almost three weeks now and things haven't changed, if anything they've only gotten better. This is serious for me and from how San has been, it's serious for him as well and he's been treating me really well. It's been a struggle hiding it from my two best friends but Hongjoong and Seonghwa have been a great help. They've been covering for us if we've struggled to find time alone, like last night. Hongjoong said he'll tell the others I slept with him last night so they won't suspect anything. I feel bad lying but this is something I want to cherish just a little longer and I know Yeosang will understand it. Yunho I'm not so sure. I mean he knows about my crush on San but I'm not too sure he'll be happy about me acting on it but I know he'll come around in the end.

"It's no problem at all. I mean, Hwa and I know how hard it can be sometimes to find time alone. We've been through it before, only we didn't have to sleep in a room with our friend who is nosy and will notice when you aren't in your bed," Hongjoong said with a shrug.

"Still, we appreciate it," I said, letting go of Seonghwa to instead slip my hand into his. He glanced down before glancing up at me with a raised eyebrow. I grinned back at him as I swung our hands back and back and forth. His lips turned up slightly and my grin grew.

"Have you two got anything planned for tomorrow," Hongjoong asked as we walked.

"Uh no, not the two of us. Wooyoung was with me last Sunday so he's heading to Hogsmede with the others," San said.

"And you're joining us remember. You said you were going to try and get along with Yunho remember. For me," I said, glancing at San who rolled his eyes.

"Yeah, yeah, I know," he said.

"Good, cos I'm hoping to tell them about us in a week or so if you're ok with that," I said, squeezing Seonghwa's hand nervously. San stopped walking and turned to me with wides eyes.

"Wait, seriously," he asked as the rest of us stopped as well.

"Um, yeah. I-Is that ok," I asked nervously. San's eyes were wide but he wasn't saying anything and it made me panic. Maybe this wasn't a good idea, maybe he isn't sure if this is what he wants, maybe he wants to wait longer. I clenched my hands nervously.

"San," Seonghwa said firmly.

"Wh-. Oh shit, no. Hey, don't panic. Of course that's ok. I was just surprised," San said quickly as he hurried to my side and cupped my face gently.

"A-Are you sure? I d-don't have to. It's ok," I said quietly. San frowned and quickly wrapped his arms around me, dragging me away from Seonghwa and into a tight hug. I let go of Seonghwa's hand to wrap my arms around San and hug him tightly. Breakfast had already started so there wasn't any worry about there being people in the halls who could see.

"It's completely fine alright. You can tell them whenever you want to and I will be fine with it, promise," San said softly as he rubbed his hand up and down my back. I let out a shaky breath and relaxed. Trust me to always overreact.

"You okay now? I'm sorry for making you panic," San said quietly.

"No, it's my fault. I stress too much sometimes," I said with a sigh as I pulled away.

"No it's not, I understand me not saying anything would've been worrying," San said softly. He cupped my face and glanced around the halls before stepping closer and pressing a soft kiss to my lips. He then pressed one to my forehead and gave me another hug.

"Remember, communication is key Sweetheart. You're the one who said that," he said quietly before pulling back and letting me go.

"Right, communication," I said with a nod, making him chuckle.

"Now come on or we're going to end up missing breakfast," San said. We both turned around but froze as we came face to face with Hongjoong and Seonghwa who had their arms wrapped around each others shoulders and were watching us with dopey grins on their faces.

"What," San asked.

"That was adorable," Hongjoong said. San scoffed and rolled his eyes.

"Yeah, whatever. Now come on," he said walking past them. I followed quickly, flashing Hongjoong a grin as I passed. When we got to the Great Hall, the four of us went over to the Gryffindor table where the others were already sitting and eating.

"Morning Sangie," I said as I sat down next to him.

"Good morning. Where were you last night? Yunho said you weren't in the dorm last night," he said.

"Oh yeah. I was actually with Hongjoong. He is so cuddly. Tiny, but cuddly," I said with a grin.

"Huh, seriously," Yeosang asked and I nodded.

"And you couldn't even say hello, rude," he said as he scooped more porridge into his mouth.

"He was like a leech, be thankful," Hongjoong said. I sent a glare to him but he grinned. I guess if he's covering for me, he can get away with saying whatever.

"Yeah, he does that a lot. You know he will sometimes wrap both his arms and legs around you and just cling like that all night," Yunho said.

"Yes, why don't we just keep gossiping about Wooyoung," I said, rolling my eyes as I grabbed a plate.

"Gossiping about Wooyoung is great," Jongho butt in with a grin.

"Watch it child, I'm older than you," I said, sending him a frown. He gasped and clutched his hands to his chest dramatically, making me roll my eyes. I was going to grab some food when there was a sudden screech and something dropped in my lap. I was surprised because while the post comes every morning at breakfast, I never get anything. I glanced down in my lap and my heart stopped. Instead of a normal white envelope, it was a bright red. My mind went into panic mode and I shot up from the table.

"Woo-."

"Be right back," I said cutting Yeosang off as I sprinted from the room. I didn't have long so I ran into the closest classroom and ripped out my wand.

"Muffliato," I said quickly as I pointed my wand to at the door. My heart was pounding but everyone knows you can't ignore a howler and I've already taken too long to open it. I let out a shaky breath before opening it. It rose into the air and shifted shape, turning into a little face.

"JUNG WOOYOUNG YOU PIECE OF SHIT, GOOD FOR NOTHING, USELESS BOY." Lovely way to start.

"YOU'RE THE WORST THING IN MY LIFE, MY BIGGEST MISTAKE. I WISH YOU WERE NEVER BORN YOU PIECE OF SHIT." Oh, that's, that's nice.

"I HATE YOU AND I'VE BEEN STUCK FOR YEARS HAVING TO TAKE CARE OF YOUR UNGRATEFUL ASS," the Howler screeched getting closer to my face and I stumbled back quickly. This certainly wasn't what I was expecting so early in the morning.

"YOU DESERVE TO BE DEAD, NOT YOUR MOTHER. SHE WAS EVERYTHING YOU AREN'T, SHE DESERVES TO BE ALIVE. I WISH YOU WERE DEAD INSTEAD OF HER. YOU SHOULD HAVE DIED INSTEAD OF HER!" My heart skipped stopped and my blood ran cold. Mum's dead?

"YOU SHOULD HAVE SUFFERED. YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN IN PAIN EVERYDAY BUT INSTEAD YOU WERE HANGING AROUND WITH THAT STUPID HALF-BLOOD LITTLE SHIT. YOU SHOULD BE DEAD. I WANT YOU DEAD. I HATE YOU, YOU WORTHLESS ASSHOLE." My knees buckled and I collapsed to the floor, not even registering the pain that shot through my legs as I hit the ground. My heart clenched and I gasped, grasping my chest tightly as pain shot through it. My breathing quickened and I found it harder to take each breath. The howler was still screaming at me, my father continuing to hurls insults at me. I gotta hand it to him, some were pretty creative. It was pretty pointless though because it felt like I got dunked under ice cold water and my ears blocked so I couldn't even hear what he was saying. I heaved out a sob as the tears started to stream down my face.

Mum's dead. She died and I didn't even say goodbye. I didn't go home for Christmas because I didn't want to deal with dad but that was my last chance to see her. I was selfish and I didn't go home because of my own desires and now she's dead. Some son I am, not even saying goodbye to my dying mother before she passed.

"HER FUNERAL IS THE 28TH AND YOU BETTER BE THERE ON YOUR BEST BEHAVIOUR. BE THE SON YOU NEVER COULD BE AND STOP BEING A DISAPPOINTMENT." The funeral. There's a funeral. Because she's dead.

"I HATE YOU, YOU LITTLE SHIT BUT YOU BETTER NOT RUIN THIS LIKE EVERYTHING ELSE." The howler finally stopped yelling and ripped itself apart, the pieces fluttering down to the ground. I continued to sob as the realisation hit me harder. She's gone forever.

The blood pounded in my ears and my heart thudded quickly in my chest. My hand that was still clutching it started to shake violently, barely staying in one place. My vision blurred, shrinking drastically as if I was looking through a tiny lens. It felt like the room was shrinking, the walls getting closer and closer to my body, trapping me in the small, enclosed space. I clenched my hands closed, trying to ground myself but it didn't help. All it did was add to the pain as my nails dug harshly into my palms. Breathing was hard, really hard. It was as if I had run all the way around the castle without stopping. In fact, it didn't even feel like I was breathing at all. I sobbed even hard through uneven breaths, my chest growing tight as I felt bile rise in my throat. I heaved slightly before dropping my head to the side and vomiting out what little was left in my stomach. My stomach tightened and I heaved again but there was nothing left to throw up so all that happened was more pain shot through my stomach. I collapsed onto my side, no longer having the energy to hold myself up as I sobbed, heaved and gasped for breath. My vision got even more blurry before it just blacked out completely, my breathing stopped and my stomach clenched. Then everything stopped.

~~~~~

When I woke up again, it was already into the second class but I couldn't find it in myself to care. I just felt completely numb, feeling no emotion at all. I sat up slowly, my head pounding. My back was sore and my face was all messed up and crusty from crying and there was a horrible smell from the vomit sitting beside me. I sniffled and wiped my eyes with my sleeve before dropping it down again. I just sat like that aimlessly for a few minutes.

What am I supposed to do now? I just found out mum is dead, am I seriously supposed to go to class? Why would I even care about stupid school work right now. Not to mention I would have to see the others and there is no way I want to be near anyone right now. I don't want anyone asking any questions because I don't want to talk about anything. I don't want to talk to anyone about how my dad hates my guts and my mum died without me even saying goodbye to her. Dad's right. I'm useless, I'm a terrible son, a no good piece of shit. I just need to be alone right now. I need to be alone because I deserve to be alone.

I slowly pushed myself to my feet, my knees cracking as I straightened out. There's only one place I can go that I can guarantee no one will bother me. I grabbed my hood and pulled it over my head before slowly leaving the room. I walked shakily through the halls, my legs feeling like jelly and my head pounding. When I finally got to the medical wing, I pushed open the door and stumbled inside, Madame Promfrey coming out a few seconds later.

"Wooyoung? What can I do for yo. Are you ok," she asked softly as she took note of my face. I pulled my hood off and stumbled over to the bed at the end and threw myself on top of it before curling up.

"Wooyoung," she said gently as she came over.

"I don't feel well. I threw up and I feel really dizzy," I said quietly.

"That's not good. Have you been eating properly," she asked. I really don't feel like talking and getting a lecture from her.

"I feel like I'm going to throw up if I talk and my head is pounding," I said quietly.

"Ok. You just rest here and see if sleeping it off helps. If anything changes or you feel worse, come and get me," she said.

"Okay. And please don't let anyone come and visit, I'm not in the mood," I said with a sigh.

"I can do that, you just rest," she said before drawing the curtain around me. I curled up further on the bed, squeezing my eyes shut tightly as I felt tears well up in them. I guess I have plenty of time to cry but I don't deserve to. It's all my fault. She's dead because of me. Because I'm a useless piece of shit. It should have been me that suffered, it should have been me that died, not her.

A/N

Here is Chapter 29, thank you for reading and I hope you enjoyed it

This was a fun one. It was soft at the start but then we got to the good stuff. Wooyoung's definitely going to be going through it in the coming chapters

Let me know your favourite parts of this chapter and if there's anything else you might be hoping to see