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*

"Hi, guys! It's me, Ifra, also known to you all thatdesigalontv! I'm sorry I've been AWOL lately, but life has been really hectic." Holding up her phone on the selfie stick, Ifra spoke into it with a sweet, friendly smile.

"Ho asaan teri gal karni, ho asaan teri gal karni, gal karni ay daddy naal, o assan teri gal karni." A voice sang out and Ifra glanced over her shoulder.

*"I'm going to speak to my father regarding you [marriage alliance]." - A song.

Rohaan stood at the doorway of the room, a slow grin spreading across his face. 

"Guys, this is my sort of cousin-ish, in the sense that our mothers are sisterly best friends." Ifra turned back to face the camera, where she was live streaming on social media. "Rohaan. But if you ignore him, he'll go away. But enough about this guy. I am..." She froze as Rohaan reached forward and ended the live stream. "Rohaan, what is this badtameezi?" She whirled around to glare at him.

"I need a favour from you." 

"You ask nicely, with a magical word." 

"I need you to do something that is for not my sake, but for the sake of another...many others, actually." He suddenly looked serious.

"What is it?" She asked warily. It was hard to take Rohaan seriously sometimes.

"Please dedicate a vlog to an anti-bullying campaign." He spoke softly.

Ifra blinked up at him in surprise. For a few seconds, she didn't say a word, and when she did, her mouth felt too dry. "Arsal again?" 

She had a flashback that was painful for her to remember. She had been in year seven, Arsal in year eight and Rohaan in year nine. She remembered how Arsal had been bleeding from the forehead, sitting on the ground with his hair messy and a button of his shirt torn. She remembered the sound of fists hitting flesh; of Rohaan's angry face as he avenged his brother. 

"Yamna." 

"Yamna?" It was even more horrifying to hear about the sweet little ten-year-old girl being bullied. 

"Yes, our little cousin who has literally harmed nobody in her life." He looked at her silently for a few seconds. "So...will you do me this favour?"

"I'll do what I can, but it's not like I'm a social media celebrity..."

"You have thousands of followers. That helps."

"Okay, but I'm doing this only for Yamna." 

"Who else would you be doing this for?" He questioned, taking her by surprise.

But she was the daughter of Hareem Jamshed, and she recovered quickly. "Maybe for those good people that you just happened to be related to." She turned her back to him. "I'll do whatever I can. But please go now. I promised my fans a live streaming."

As Rohaan turned to leave, she sneaked a peek at him. There was a time during her pre-teen and teenage years where she couldn't stand him. He seemed too arrogant and full of himself. But gradually she started to understand that he had a good heart, and today was just one example of it. He truly cared about his family. This was a fact that she couldn't deny. 

She giggled quickly. Plus he's cute.

Rohaan had always been the guy that girls crushed on automatically, but Ifra didn't care until she realised what a good person he really was. For her, as his good personality had become clearer, his attractiveness has increased. After all, what is a good face if the interior is dark?

*

Hooriya

As the days passed by, Farhaan started to grow more and more distant from the B&B. His primary focus became the rebirth of the original Rose Luxe. His days were spent in fancy offices in the city of London, whereas I enjoyed the beauty of countryside as the summer edged towards autumn. I began to fall in love with the B&B so much that the idea of stepping back in September was making my heart sink.

I arrived at the B&B one bright morning and saw Tahira behind the desk, bidding farewell to some guests who were checking out. Her chestnut brown hair was in a neat high ponytail, and she had a warm and genuine smile one her face as she spoke to the middle aged couple. She was trying her best and was truly happy about being offered this opportunity. It was clear that she was putting her best into this.

"Hey." She grinned at me as I walked up to stand beside her once the guests had gone.

"Hi. How are you doing, Tahira?" 

"Honestly, really good. I feel light-hearted and relaxed...and most of all, hopeful." 

"That's good to hear." I placed my hand on her shoulder. "You're learning things quickly, Tahira." 

"I'm not going to do anything half-heartedly, Hooriya. This place is literally my livelihood. I'm going to put my all in it." 

"Keep it up, and one day we might just see you in the role of management." Giving her a smile, I headed up the stairs and towards Farhaan's office. 

The moment I closed the door, I leaned back against it and took a deep breath, closing my eyes. I could feel myself shaking. As much I was trying to maintain normalcy, the façade imploded in solitude. I almost had a scare last night when I'd realised that my period was late by a day. When it had started this morning, I'd ended up having a breakdown with relief. Fortunately, Farhaan was away for the night, having an out-of-city meeting with some investors, along with his father.

The idea of being pregnant terrified me to the core. I mean, of course I wanted to start a family with Farhaan eventually...but the actual getting there part made me want to curl up in a dark place and cry.

I felt a tear run down my cheek. I'd narrowly avoided a panic attack last night due to this.

*

FLASHBACK

"Imagine how gorgeous would their kids be!" Ifra spoke excitedly as we walked a few yards behind Farhaan and Sophie on the walking trail at Virginia Water.

"Let them marry first before you think of their family!" Syra giggled.

We all- my siblings, Farhaan's siblings and cousins and Shayaan the Bunny, had come out to enjoy a nice Sunday out, and my heart had sank when I'd seen that Sophie Khan had joined us.

"Gosh, their kids might as well be models." Ifra continued. 

Haya looked at me sympathetically, but I acted nonchalant.

"I bet they are going to be one of those couples who have a kid in the first year of marriage." Syra added.

"Allah!" I spoked out. "Can we stop with their family planning? Astaghfirullah!" The truth was that I was jealous beyond words. My envy was making me feel nauseated, but I pushed it down. I didn't want my envy or my pain to even unintentionally cause the lovely couple to be impacted by nazar(evil eye).

"We're just excited to be Phuphos, Hoor Appi." Ifra shrugged. "Babies are adorable!"

"Ugh, babies." Haya simply said. "Loud and with some form of liquid...or other things...dripping out of them constantly."

"Eww, gross." Syra made a face. "Just wait until you have your own nieces and nephews...I wonder if your opinion will remain the same or it will change." 

"The moment I feel any danger of liquid, I'll toss the baby towards its parents."

"Toss?" I looked at her. "You're talking about a baby, not a cricket ball."

"Aww, Hoor Appi already protective of her future baby." Ifra teased me.

"Baby?" I shrieked out. "Excuse me? Let's stop discussing something that won't happen for along time." I shuddered. I still remembered Saba Chachi's pregnancy. She had been hospitalised due to severe morning sickness. Our families had been staying at our Dado's house during her final month, and I still remember hearing Saba Chachi cry out in sudden pain. "As much respect as I have for mothers for all that they go through, I don't think I'll ever have a baby." I felt a phantom ache in my lower parts just thinking about the pain.

"Hoor has zero tolerance for pain." Haya added. "She can't tolerate a papercut, let alone childbirth."

"Don't you people have better things to discuss in your lives?"

"Do you seriously not want kids?" Syra asked me, curiously.

I glanced towards Farhaan. I'd daydreamed about him during my classes, like any other normal teenage girl with a crush. I'd imagined being married to him years from now, with a family of our own. But that was a silly fantasy that remained locked in the confines of my mind and heart. "I feel like, at this point in my life, I shouldn't even be thinking about kids. I'm a university student, not even married. So, let's stop discussing this."

"Discussing what?" Aizah Appi and Tamanna Appi had approached us as I spoke.

"Don't you think your twin brother and his fiancée would have gorgeous kids?" Ifra asked Farhaan's twin.

"Only if they take after their mother or Phupho." Aizah Appi grinned.

I walked ahead, feeling an unreasonable amount of jealousy within me. I didn't want to be that person, the one who unintentionally or intentionally harbours negativity for others. Sophie was a sweet, kind person, from what I'd heard. And they both loved each other and were happy with each other. Why should I let my childhood crush and unreasonable daydreams cause me to resent them?

*

PRESENT

I had daydreamed, I had fantasised and I had imagined for so long, and now that I was living it out, I was starting to see the bits of reality that was piercing through the perfect, flawless bubble that had been created in my head. A world of fiction, cursed with the harshness of real life.

In real life, it wasn't just love and romance. Responsibility and anxiety, stress and worry were all a huge part of the package. 

A loud knock on the door made me jump with a gasp. I stepped forward and whirled around, staring at the door as if there was a zombie on the other side. "W-Who is it?" 

The door opened and the manager Julia entered. "Mrs Farhaan, there's a problem."

"What is it?" I moved towards the desk and sat on it, raising both eyebrows at her.

"Room seven was double booked." She informed me. "I guess it was a glitch in the system. And now both parties are here and both refused to leave. They are demanding to speak to...well, you."

"Me?" My voice came out in a horrified whisper. I had no idea how to resolve conflicts unless they were between my siblings.

"In Mr Farhaan's absence, you're the boss, right?" 

"Can we just not offer them another room?" 

"We're fully booked." Her tone clearly implied that it was a fact that I should have already known.

I thought about it for a few moments. "We're going to have to either refund them, I suppose...or rebook them elsewhere." 

"Would you like to come and speak to them? I tried, but they wanted my senior." Julia looked uncomfortable.

During my time here, I'd seen Farhaan look out for his employees. He always had their backs (as long as they were in the right), and never let them face crap alone. I had to do the same, no matter how difficult the thought of facing angry customers was right now. I took a deep breath and nodded. "Okay, let's go." 

When I got downstairs, I saw two middle aged couples seeming to have some sort of a standoff. They turned when they saw me follow Julia into the lobby.

"Are you the boss?" The man with the blue flannel shirt asked me, his nostrils flaring.

"I'm..." I said. "I apologise for the mix-up. Everything is computerised, and computers fail at times. The glitch must have..."

"So what do you expect us to do?" The wife from the other couple asked me, wearing a straw hat. 

"We can r-rebook you i-into another place nearby." I offered, feeling myself tremble.

"Who will you rebook? How will you choose? We paid money for a room in this place, and you will force one of us to move?" 

"The rebooking will be done based on who booked later." 

"Why take our money if you can't provide us the service?" Blue flannel asked, his voice rising.

I swallowed hard. "As I said, the booking system is all computerised and..."

"We are not going anywhere!" Straw hat's husband snapped. "Get your senior. You clearly have no idea what you're doing."

"She is the boss." Julia informed them, although she tossed an uncertain look in my direction.

And then it seemed like the two parties united against me, seeing me as a common enemy. All four of them looked at me like I was an insect or something. My hands curled in fists, feeling cold.

"Is there a man around?" Straw hat's husband grunted out.

"I don't know if you know the law of this country, but 'gender ' is one of the protected characteristics that shouldn't be discriminated against." Tahira appeared by my side and glared at the couples. "You cannot disregard the words of our boss here simply because she's a female. So, I suggest that you either allow us to rebook you- free of charge, of course. Or you can be fully refunded your money. There was a problem, and we're offering solutions. Whether you take it or not is your problem, not ours." 

I glanced gratefully at her, even as my cheeks turned red with embarrassment.

"We'll see who booked later, and I'm afraid that party would have to be booked into another hotel or B&B." Julia added.

"This is not fair!" Straw hat whined at her husband. "When we pay for something, we shouldn't be denied it." 

"When one is unable to fulfil the contractual requirements, compensation is provided. It's either in the form of providing a similar product to the one you paid for, or a full refund. We are accepting to do whatever you choose regarding your compensation." Tahira spoke again, her confidence seriously surprising me. It didn't seem at all like this was her first job! 

"Are you her boss?" Blue flannel's gaze was on Tahira, but his finger was pointed in my direction. "Because she doesn't seem to know how to handle herself in public." 

It stung, but I tried to keep up my composure. Don't take it personally, Hoor.

As Julia and Tahira continued discussing what was next for them, I turned and silently walked out. Heading straight back up to Farhaan's office, I thought about the man's words: "...she doesn't seem to know how to handle herself in public."

If I couldn't handle a minor conflict like this, how was I supposed to stand in front of hundreds of students and give lectures?

*

"You okay?" 

I was drinking coffee while sitting on the chair in the office, around half an hour later, when Tahira had come up. "I'm fine." I looked up at her. "Thank you." 

"May I?" She gestured at the chairs across the desk. As I nodded, she sat down. "You know, I had to learn to stand up for myself. I often got mocked in the flats where we lived, and I learned to stand up for myself. It wasn't my fault that I came from a dysfunctional family, so why should I suffer for it?" 

My heart ached for her. In contrast, I'd had a pretty sheltered life, with one person or another always defending me or standing up for me. Alhumdulillah, I loved my life, but maybe that constant sheltering had impacted my confidence.

"People always try to shatter us, Hooriya. But we have a duty first and foremost to ourselves, to look out for ourselves." 

I gave her a weak smile. "Arsal told me you were good with advice."

"Experiences teach you a lot, and I don't think it's correlated to age." She smiled back at me. "It's okay, Hooriya. We're all on the same time. We all have to watch out for each other, right?" 

I nodded. "As you can clearly tell, I'm not really the boss. I'm just a substitute."

"The boss entrusted you to replace him in his absence. You're not 'just a substitute', you are a boss."

I laughed humourlessly. "I'm his wife, so he's kind of biased."

"I've also learnt that when we ourselves are hell bent on being our own enemies, we cannot blame others for bringing us down." She said. "Don't be your own enemy, Hooriya."

I could now see why Arsal saw her as someone who could be our future Bhabi. She was a genuine person who encouraged those around her to be their best. In a world which was concerned about their own selfish needs, she supported those around her. Tahira was a great person, Ma Sha Allah, and I wished nothing but the best for her. 

*

"Julia called me." Farhaan told me as he unbuttoned his shirt after having returned a short while ago. "Told me how we had an issue with a room being double booked and how great Tahira was in resolving that issue."

I sat in bed, under my duvet, and nodded. "Yes, Tahira has great potential, Ma Sha Allah."

He looked at me over his shoulder. "She also said that Tahira could be an assistant manager-at the very least- within a few months."

"I agree."

He walked over to the bed and faced down, facing me. "You okay?" 

I pursed my lips, shrugging. "I guess...I feel a little insecure." I crossed my legs and played with the edge of the duvet.

"Because of Tahira?" He looked bewildered.

I shook my head. "No, of course not. Tahira is great." I sighed. "I just think that I lack confidence greatly. I overestimated my ability to take on the role of a lecturer...or even to help manage the B&B."

"Don't do that, Hoor. Don't lose your self-confidence." He leaned forward to brush back a lock of my hair. "It was a minor incident; your first one. It happens."

I shook my head in protest. "You don't get it. After that, I was shaking at the idea of being a lecturer. At at the thought of everyone watching me, judging me..." My voice broke.

He took my hands in his. "You have it in you, Hooriya. You've wanted this for such a long time. Don't let this incident shake you. Remain strong, learn from this experience. You are Hooriya Farhaan. You are the boss of Rose Luxe B&B, and no damn way is anyone going to talk down to you in your own place next time, okay? You'll always have my back as long as you are in the right."

I traced my fingers over his face- a face that had been a part of my heart's deepest desires since as long as I could remember. A childhood crush that had morphed into pure and true love. I sat back, leaning my hands on the bed. "I think I'm going to step down from the university offer this year. I think I'm going to take this year to gain the much needed confidence." 

"Hoor..." A small frown of concern appeared on his face.

"Don't worry. I'm not giving up on this. I just need to improve my confidence, that's all. I don't want to be put in the position again where I am shown down in my own place- whether it's by the guests at the B&B or students." 

He put a hand on the back of my neck. "Whatever you want, Hooriya, I'm with you."

"Funnily enough, that's something that I'd wanted for a long time: for you to be with me." I gave him a weak smile.

He leaned forward and kissed me, softly and sweetly. I wrapped my arms around his bare torso and kissed him back, feeling my heart flutter in happiness. With people around me constantly encouraging me and lifting me up, I felt truly blessed. Alhumdulillah!

But as I felt his hand slide under my shirt to lay on my waist, I remembered my little panic attack, and therefore the relief from the panic attack. "I'm on my period." I blurted out.

We'd had unprotected s*x at the B&B a while ago, which was why the one day delay in the period had freaked me out. It had happened because neither of us had been able to control our desires that day and had ended up on the sofa of Farhaan's office...

He grinned. "I wasn't the one thinking about s*x." 

My cheeks turned warm and I pulled the duvet up to cover my face.

"I love you." He chuckled, pulling the duvet away and taking me in his arms. "Get all the confidence you want, Hoor, but never change your core personality."

"I love you too." I rested my head against his chest.

I was no longer living a fantasy in my head; I was living a reality that reminded me that I had a lot of growing up to do emotionally before I added the responsibilities of a parent to my list. Also,  while in my head, it was nice to picture myself as a lecturer, in real life it was going to be much harder for me. I needed to strengthen myself up before facing that role...if I chose to do it ultimately.

*

Farhaan

<Faizan: I think I have found her!>

Waking up to that cryptic text from my brother confused me.

<Farhaan: Who?>

I turned my head and saw Hoor curled up beside me, her back towards me. Her eyes were closed but her hand was pressed against her lower abdomen, as if in pain. "You okay?"

"You men are so lucky." She muttered. "No periods, no childbirth."

My phone buzzed and I glanced down at it again.

<Faizan: Your Bhabi!>

I didn't have the time to think about this bombshell...not that it really was a bombshell. Faizan had said it at least two times before that he might have found my Bhabi, so it wasn't exactly easy to take him seriously. I set the phone aside and placed my hand on Hoor's upper arm. "Can I do anything?" 

"I wouldn't mind a cup of tea..." She turned on her back and looked up at me.

"Your wish is my command, Boss." With a grin, I kissed the tip of her nose. Getting off the bed, I headed to the bathroom for the morning routine, first and foremost. 

When I returned, she was lying on her side, with a tear running down the side of her face. "Hoor?"

"I was humiliated yesterday! Even those guests thought that I was a joke!"

"Hoor, just forget about that now, okay?" I said. "Look, this was your first time and you were taken aback by it. Otherwise any role where you face customers, you have to eventually deal with situations like this, but you'll get used to it. I just know it. You are capable of anything, Hooriya." 

"I hate periods. Every time it's this time, every emotion of mine is magnified." She groaned. She sat up. "I'm definitely going to pause the idea of being a lecturer. I want to grow in confidence, and when I feel ready, I'll apply again. I'm only twenty-three. In Sha Allah, I'll have plenty of chances to become a lecturer."

My phone buzzed again.

"Who keeps messaging you?" She had a teasing smile on her face now as she ran a finger up and down my arm.

"Your dewar." I chuckled, grabbing my phone again.

<Faizan: Dude, are you not even gonna ask me for details?>

<Farhaan: Okay. Tell me, Faizan, who is the latest potential Bhabi?>

"How are Aizah Appi and Faizan Bhai doing in Pakistan, anyway?" 

"Aizah is loving it, and Faizan reached Lahore yesterday so he's probably up to know good with our cousins there." 

"Do you wish you were there with them?" 

"Hoor, I barely have the time to spend time at home with you. I know that there's no point in wishing for it and making myself feel bad when I know that there's no practical way I could be there." 

"I wished for something that I didn't think could be mine." She ran her fingers through my hair. "And despite me only wanting your happiness, no matter who it was going to be with, I got my wish."

"Hoor." I wrapped an arm around her and pulled her against myself.

Whether this time it was real or not, I wanted Faizan to find a partner as loving and caring as Hoor as well. I wanted my siblings to feel the same marital bliss that I had been feeling since the day I had married Hoor. In Sha Allah.

*

Third Person POV

"Nina?" 

Nina Tariq looked up from where she sat at a table in the dining hall of the Leisure Club and saw Rebecca walking towards her. "Hello, Rebecca. How are you?" 

The younger woman took a seat opposite the Tariq family matriarch. "I am well, and I hope the same for you." She paused, almost hesitantly. "Nina, you have known me for years." 

"I have, indeed."

"Then I hope you don't mind if I ask you something." 

"Go ahead." Nina spoke curiously.

"Would you know if your son and daughter-in-law are ready to consider the marriage of their second daughter, Haya? Because I would like to take over a marriage proposal for Haya for my nephew Aariz."

*

Hey guys, sorry for the delay. Unfortunately, there will be more delays. I'm going to Lahore for two weeks (In Sha Allah), so I doubt that I'd be able to write during this time.

I quickly wrote this chapter up to give you guys something.

Thoughts and comments?

Thank you for reading and don't forget to vote!