"Any of them. Whichever one is the best. No wait, whichever is your favourite. That is more important." I replied with a smile. Nathan was frowning a little at me.

"But... Don't you want me to stay?" He asked hesitantly. He was pouting. Oh god it was so cute to see him pouting. I melted internally.

"Of course I want you to stay. It just isn't realistic of me to ask you to do that. I've been thinking about it a lot lately. I really want what's best for you. So... even if you decide to go overseas... I am not breaking up with you. I can just wait for you, alright?" I looked up at him earnestly, biting my lip as I waited for him to respond.

"You'd do that? You'd really wait for me?" He asked quietly. I nodded and hugged him close.

"Yes. I'll wait for you. As long as it takes." I told him firmly. He patted my hair like he thought I was going to disappear.

"I'm dreaming right?" He murmured to himself. I laughed at him and shook my head.

"No. You aren't dreaming. It's only fair, isn't it?" I rested my chin on his chest to look up with a mischievous look.

"What?" He was in a daze.

"You waited all that time for me to wake up. It is only fair if I wait for you to finish your schooling. Actually, does that mean I am Sleeping Beauty and not Cinderella?" I pretended to think hard about it. Nathan tossed me over his shoulder and stormed over to the big slide on the other side. I was laughing at him as he placed me down finally on the top of the tower.

"Alas, fair maiden, I must leave you for a time... will you grant me a kiss?" He joked dramatically. I snorted and grabbed his lapels to drag him forward. I kissed him hard and then pulled back. I pretended to fling my hair like a girl.

"Humph, pity that's all you want. I was going to give you my virginity." I gave him a smirk and then sat down on the big plastic mouth at the top to slide down. His mouth worked for a moment without sounds, then he moved forward to chase me. I laughed and pushed myself down the slide.

"Well, if you are going to offer... I won't say no!" He called out a little desperately from the top of the slide. I nearly fell over in mirth as I got up from the bottom of the slide.

"Ahahaha! You sleaze. Come on then. What are you waiting for?" I heard him slide down the slide clumsily. He nearly toppled me over at the bottom and I giggled as I now gave him something to chase after. I let him catch me halfway to the entrance.

"Are you sure Brad? I mean, we don't have to." He was panting a little from running around and I thought it was really sexy.

"I'm sure. You want to come back to mine? Lizard is gone for the night. You know my parents are cool." I tilted my head at him. He looked nervous but nodded his head. I grabbed his hand and we made our way in awkward silence back to my house. We walked pretty fast compared to how we left the first time, and I trembled a little as I unlocked the front door to let us in.

"Are you sure it's okay?" Nate whispered to me in my ear as we shucked off our shoes. I hung our spring jackets in the closet and pulled him into the kitchen. I handed him a can of juice from the fridge, stalling for a moment. We drank our drinks in silence, glancing at the clock on the stove that read quarter after one in the morning.

"You want to?" I asked him seriously, biting my lips in nervousness. I felt his arms come around me and hug me gently.

"All the time. I can wait though." He told me frankly. I shook my head and pulled him down for a kiss.

"I can't. Let's go." I pulled him out of the kitchen. We both knew what steps creaked. I watched for light and listened for movement down the hall, but it was all quiet. All clear. I was pulled backwards into my room and Nate's lips trailed down across my neck and shoulder. I gulped.

"Take it off." Nate whispered in my ear, tugging at my jeans and pullover. I nodded and slipped the fabric over my head, tossing it somewhere on the floor. My jeans dropped unceremoniously to join it. Now I was in my t-shirt, boxers and socks. I shivered as I felt his hands on my stomach.

"You too." I murmured back. I felt his warmth leave me and turned to watch as he pulled his long sleeve shirt over his head to reveal his fine toned stomach. I nearly drooled when his slacks popped open and slid over his muscular legs to join my jeans. I reached out for him, feeling a little shy but determined. His body pressed back up against mine.

"Do you have what we need?" He looked down at me with passion. I blinked up at him and nodded with a furious blush.

"In my desk." I admitted, pointing across the room to the drawer. He wanted to pull away, but I held him tightly because I was nervous. I wanted reassurance. He looked at me and then surprised me by picking me up. I wrapped my arms and legs around him.

"Come on. We are in this together, right?" He smiled and walked across the room with me dangling from him. There was an unopened tube of lube and a pack of condoms tucked underneath some papers. It was poorly hidden, but then my parents didn't usually search my room. He grabbed them and we sat on the bed together.

"This feels so awkward." I complained. He laughed softly.

"Of course it does. It's our first time." He commented. He was struggling to peel the safety seal off the lube so I grabbed it and gave it a shot. It was stubborn. I growled and grabbed a pen from my nightstand. I stabbed it vigorously a few times, and looked up to see Nate covering his mouth to keep from exploding in laughter.

"Shut up." I muttered, putting the cap back over the now open tube. He made like he was zipping up his mouth, still grinning like a maniac at me. I rolled my eyes and pointed at the condoms. He nodded and opened those. I squeezed some of the lube into my fingers and rubbed it a bit. It felt weird and slimy.

Here goes nothing, I thought to myself as I climbed onto the bed and spread my legs. I reached down and rubbed it on myself. Yep. Still felt weird. It was not getting me in the mood at all, that was for sure. I poked a finger in and grimaced. This was hard to do. I nearly fell over when I felt Nate smack my hand away.

His hands were warm. One held my thigh, and the other... started getting me in the mood. It was slick with the lube and traced over and around me, sometimes rubbing between my hole and sack, rolling my balls in his fingers and palm, stroking over my shaft while I shuddered. So much better with someone else doing it.

So much better with him. Nathan. My boyfriend. The boy I loved. I smiled to myself as I heard his harsh breathing picking up. He was dipping his fingers in and out of my hole now. I hoped it was clean enough. I didn't want to gross him out or anything. It should be fine. I had a shower after work after all, and I had been practising that a little.

"Can... can I..." His voice sounded low and strangled behind me. I glanced over at his face and saw his eyes were completely focused on his movements. I responded by opening my legs a little wider and leaning down more. His breath caught in his throat. I heard the crinkle of plastic and waited for what came next.

It was bound to hurt. I hadn't stuck anything in there before besides fingers. Even with him all lubed up it was tighter than I thought. I felt a little queasy at first. That was a cock going inside me right now. That was Nathan's... a part of him... going inside me. I shuddered as he pressed forwards, holding me carefully and breathing hard as he tried to go slow.

"Fucksake Nate. When'd you get so big?" I complained into the comforter. He laughed a bit at my words and gave my butt a smack. That made me jolt and he hissed as I tightened about him. I tried to take in a deep breath, and let it out slowly. He was sliding deeper. It wasn't too bad really. I think. Sort of.

Mostly I just tried to relax. When Nate finally started to move his hips in a thrusting motion, I was already used to the feeling of his warmth inside me. It felt good sliding in my insides. Once in awhile it brushed or hit against something that had my hair feeling like it would stand on end and made my balls ache.

He reached down to stroke me part way along and I pushed my face into the softness of my bed to stifle my moans. That felt really good. I could get used to this. As my balls drew up, I was tensed around him more and more. He hissed a little as I let go onto the bed and into his hand. My inner walls shuddering with the climax.

His thrusts got sloppy after that. He leaned over my back and pressed his sweaty chest against me. He grasped my hips and ground himself in deep. I heard him groan into the back of my neck and knew from the press of his hips that he was emptying himself into the condom. I could feel his muscles tense and relax.

I sighed. He slid out of me carefully and pulled off his condom. I grabbed some tissues and tried to wipe off the bed with them. He snickered at me, and I glared at him over my shoulder. He bit his lip sensually and pointedly looked over my position. I was still on my hands and knees on the bed. I rolled my eyes.

"What? I can't help it. You look sexy." He whispered into my ear as he climbed on next to me. His arm wrapped around my middle and pulled me over into his arms. He pushed down the sheets with his feet and wiped between my legs with his shirt. I protested, which he silenced with a kiss.

It was the first time we had been completely naked and kissing in bed like this. I wrapped myself snugly against him and he pulled the covers over us. I nuzzled into his neck a little as he reached over to turn off the bedside lamp. I was so content. It didn't matter how sore or sticky I felt, because I had finally figured it out.

This boy in my arms... he wasn't just my friend. I was never letting him go again, no matter where our lives took us.

Because he was my world, and he was irreplaceable.

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