Not me and Deadpool!

H a this is complete trash

I woke up at 4am today, so don't be too surprised that I'm slightly high on oxygen.

You ready Deadpool?

Yep! Time to cause chaos and confuse my Baby Boy and Helicopter Parent!

Cool! Alright, just gotta get in here...
————
??? POV

   "Oh! We're here."

   I adjusted my bright blue glasses, brushing my short blonde hair out of my face, taking in Queens, New York. 'Damn it, I've got a headache. That's what I get with interdenominational travel though, I guess. Wait, I can do whatever I want!' The headache faded. I gave a Cheshire Cat grin to Deadpool, snapping my fingers and bringing us to Stark Tower.

   "Now, what to do first..." I trailed off, ideas floating through my head. "Oh! I have an idea!" I said as I turned to Deadpool. He got out his katanas, a grin showing on his features despite the mask covering his face.

————
Peter Parker POV

   "Alright, listen up, because you know damn well I'm not repeating this for you. I'm not babysitting." Nick Fury's voice rang out in the conference room. The Avengers had been called for a huge mission, and even better, I've been invited! This is so awesome!!! Oh wait, I need to listen.

   "There's been sightings of an all powerful being in the area. They are basically a god. Find them, bring them here. It's going to be tough, no doubt about that, but you're the best people for the job. Any questions?" Fury said as he held up a holographic screen, showing a blonde girl posing for the camera.

   "....um, that's who we're supposed to be looking for?" Steve asked, pointing at the camera. "Because, that looks like a normal citizen...."

   "Don't be fooled. She's all powerful. She can do anything. Now go!" Nick said, pointing out the door.

   'She's who we're looking for? Really?' I thought as I trailed behind Mr. Stark, looking as confused as everyone else.

————
??? POV

   "Yes! It's working!!" I said excitedly as I jumped up and down. Deadpool was grinning too, clapping his hands as he exclaimed, "I get to see my baby boy! And fuck with the other Avengers!"

   "Now, now, Deadpool, that's a bad language word. Steve would be ashamed of you! Tsk, tsk, shaaammmmeeeee."I said, shaking my head in mock shame.

   "*gaSP* I'M SORRY STEVIE!" Deadpool yelled, mock begging for forgiveness. I laughed, walking in a conveniently abandoned theater, getting ready for the arrival of the Avengers, Deadpool trailing behind giddily.

————
3rd Person POV

   "FRI, run facial recognition for this picture." Tony said as he showed the picture to the camera near him. The others gathered around the information screen. It took a moment, but eventually came up with a name and a location.

   The information was.... strange.

   "Is this really all we have?" Steve asked Friday.

   "I have no other information on Siedertree Studios, my apologies Mr. Rodgers." Friday responded, with a hint of amusement.

SiederTree Studios

Location: Margret Theater, New York, Queens

Heritage: unknown

Blood type: unknown

Physical Features: Short Blonde hair, Blue eyes, Bright blue and pink glasses, tall, high-pitched voice.

   Then a new message popped on screen.

Don't you know it's rude to not say hi? 🧞‍♂️Come on, I'll see you at the theater. We'll talk there ;)

                      -SiederTreeStudios

   Everyone gaped at the message. "I don't think this is a safe mission. Spider-Man, go home." Tony said, turning to Peter.

Actually nvm, imma just tp ya'll. See ya in two seconds ;)

        -SiederTreeStudios

   A new message read, and everyone read it just in time to be zapped to the theater. It was dark, quiet, and seemingly empty. The only sign of life was a small song:

"We're hungover
In the city
Of dust...
Let out minds run round in circles while we fall apart..."
(Hungover in the City Of Dust by Autoheart)
   A voice sang softly.

   Everyone exchanged confused glances before Tony yelled, "Hey! You done with your concert?!"

   It was quiet before the voice yelled, "STAAAAAPPPHHHHH! I COULD'A DROPPED MY CROISSANT!"

   Peter snickered, yelling, "FUCK YA CHICKEN STRIPS!" Earning a glare from Steve and Tony.

   "THAT'S A BAD LANGUAGE WORD SAY SORRY TO STEVIE PETER!" The voice yelled.

    Peter just grinned as Steve facepalmed. A person raced out with something in her hand. "LET ME SEE WHAT YOU HAVE!" Peter yelled.

    "A KNIFE!"

   "NO!!" Peter yelled, as the person stepped before them, the knife gone as quick as it came. "Hi! I'm glad my message went through!"

   "IT IS WEDNESDAY MY DUDES." Peter said loudly.

   "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"She yelled.

   It was Siedertree, the girl in the picture. At that moment, Deadpool dropped down, hugging Peter and saying, "BABY BOYYYYYYYY! ITS MEEEEEE! REMEMBER? FROM YOUR PATROL! PLEEEAAASSSSEEEE SAY YOU REMEMBER PETEY!"

   Peter groaned, saying, "Wade, get off."

   "EEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" Wade squealed in excitement.

   Everyone just kind of stared.

   "Well, this is getting awkward!" Siedertree said after two seconds. "Idk what I'm doing, so imma just go sing Hamilton on stage!" Then she raced on stage and somehow did the entire musical in the span of 30 minutes with Wade and Peters help because don't look into this too much. "Okay! Done! Man this world is better than my world! I mean, I can do anything!" She said as the avengers stared, still having no clue what's going on.

   "That's it! I need a drink!" Tony proclaimed as he walked out the door, too tired for this shit.

   "Noooo! Come bacccckkkkk!" Siedertree said as she teleported him back in, much to Tony's horror. "Remember, you are all under my power!" Siedertree said way too cheerfully. "and I'm running on less than 8 hours of sleep and spite, so whatever happens, you need to go along with!"

   "Holy shit, she is a god." Steve said.

   "LaNGuAGe!1!!" Siedertree shrieked. "And yeah, I'm your god. Well, your other god. There are millions out there like me, you know. Some of them are n a s t y . But don't worry, I only do Irondad and hints of Spideypool. Your in relatively good hands :)"

  "Um??????" Everyone said except Peter and Wade. Peter exclaimed, "YOu SHiP Me wItH HIm?!" (He's in denial) While Wade just said, "YEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSS"

   "Anyway, I love messing with you guys, but I've got more stuff to write, and more fanfic to read. So, unfortunately you guys won't remember this when I leave, but hey, at least the readers will enjoy this!" Siedertree said, glancing at you. "Thanks for reading! Now, to the ending A/N!"

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1139 words

*phew* I got that done.

I've got a big project coming up for this book! You'll get a preview after this! (Assuming I get WiFi) THERE'S A HINT FOR IT IN THE STORY!

I got bored, and so this happens when I get bored.

Anyway, yea. Hope you enjoyed that!

-🍎SiederTreeStudios🍎-