JOEY
AUGUST 30TH, 1999

      "ALL YOU NEED TO DO IS KEEP YOUR HEAD DOWN AND YOUR TEMPER REINED IN. You're a smart kid. You've a smart kid. You've got this. Just keep that tongue of yours in check and don't react to any nonsense. Do you want me to walk in with you?"

"Do I fuck."

"It's okay to be nervous, Joe."

"I'm not nervous."

"And it's okay to be scared, too."

"Do I look like I'm scared?" I growled, aggravated by his incessant coddling. "I'm not a baby, Dar."

"I know you're not," my big brother conceded as we walked up the path to Ballylaggin Community School—a journey he had taken every weekday for the past six years. His time at secondary school was over now, while mine was just beginning.

"I just need this to go well for you."

"Yeah," I snorted. "Well, we both know that's not going to happen."

"This is your fresh start, Joey," he said. "Whatever happened in primary school is behind you now. Don't carry any of that trouble with you."

"There's no such thing as fresh starts," I drawled. "Just different locations filled with the same bullshit."

"You're too young to be this cynical."

"And you're too smart to waste your time and breath on this pep talk," I countered. "I'm not Shannon, lad. I don't need the words or the hand-holding."

"Is it so wrong of me to want to see you off on your first day of secondary school?"

"You could have done that back at the house." I reminded him. "You didn't need to walk me to school. I'm not a baby."

"You're my baby brother."

"I've never been a baby anything, Dar."

"Always so self-sufficient." Shaking his head, he gave me a sad smile. "Well, maybe I wanted to spend some extra time with you."

"We share a room," I deadpanned, shifting the ton of bricks that was my schoolbag onto my other shoulder. "We already spend enough time together."

"I love you, Joe," he threw me by saying. "You know that, right?"

"You love me?" Feet faltering, I turned to look up at him. "What the hell is wrong with you?"

"Nothing," he replied, tone thick with emotion. "I'm just. . .I need you to know that."

"Why?" I demanded, feeling unnerved by his sudden declaration. It was out of place and felt all wrong to me. "What's happening?"

"Nothing." Smiling, he reached down and ruffled my hair. "Nothing's happening, shithead. I just wanted to tell you."

"Okay. . ." I eyed him suspiciously, not sure if I entirely believed him. "But if you even think about hugging me in front of all these people, I will kick you in the nuts."

"Your voice is starting to break." He chuckled. "My baby brother is growing up."

"I don't need a deep voice to kick your ass." I shot back, hackles rising.

He rolled his eyes. "Sure thing, squeaky."

"Do all the girls here wear skirts that short?" Eyes widening, I watched as a group of girls filed off a school bus and onto the footpath in front of us. "I take it all back, Dar." I grinned up at my brother. "I think I'm going to like secondary school."

"Don't even think about it." Darren chuckled, ribbing me with his elbow. "Those girls are in sixth year. You're a baby first year to them."

"Already told ya that I've never been a baby anything." I shot back with a wink before turning my attention back to the glorious view of bare legs and peachy asses.

"Aren't you a bit young for getting notions about girls?"

"I'm thirteen."

"Not until December."

"I bet I've seen more tits than you."

"Mam's don't count."

We both laughed, causing a few of the girls in front to turn around.

"Oh my god! Darren Lynch!" one of the blonds squealed, giving my brother a warm smile as she moved straight for him. "What are you doing here? Didn't you get, like, a thousand points in your leaving cert last June? There's no way you're repeating sixth year."

"No, not repeating. Just walking my little brother in for his first day." Darren replied, receiving the half hug the girl offered him. "And I could ask you the same question. What are you doing slumming it in a BCS uniform, Tommen girl?"

"I, uh, transferred over here. I'm going to finish up sixth year at BCS," the blond replied in a strained tone. "It's, ah, sort of for the best, all things considered, you know?"

"Yeah." My brother nodded and sympathy filled his eyes, which confused the fuck out of me. "I do."

"So, how's everything going, Dar?" She was quick to push on from whatever the hell had them eyeing each other meaningfully. I rolled my eyes and forced back the urge to hurl.

"I haven't seen you since that weekend."

"I've been around," he told her, scratching the back of his neck. "Just dealing, you know?"

"Yeah." Another meaningful look passed between them. "I know."

"I don't." I decided to interject, because why the hell not? "Care to explain what the hell you're both talking about?"

My brother sighed in resignation before reeling off introductions. "Caoimhe, this mouthy shit is my little brother." He turned to me and gestured to the girl.

"Joe, this is Caoimhe Young. You were probably too young to remember her in primary school, but her little sister is friends with Shannon."

Her blue eyes landed on my face, and she smiled. "So, you're the next Lynch in the pecking order, huh?"

"Apparently so." I shrugged noncommittally before turning back to Darren. "Are ya done with the trip down memory lane, or do I need to stand around for another ten minutes?"

"Oh boy, Dar," she said, laughing. "You're in trouble with this one, huh?"

"Tell me about it," my brother replied with a sigh. "It was good seeing you, Caoimhe." Catching hold of the back of my neck, he steered us around the group of girls and up the path toward the school. "Take care of yourself."

"You, too, Dar," she called after us. "Keep in touch."

"Keep in touch?" I shook my head and wrestled free from his hold. "What the hell does that mean?"

"Who knows," Darren muttered. "You know the way girls are."

"Did you have sex with her?"

"What?" He stopped walking and swung me around to look at him. "No, I didn't have sex with her. Why would you even ask me that?"

"Don't get all high and mighty on me." I laughed, playfully shoving his chest. "I know you've been with girls in the past."

Darren sighed heavily. "Not like that, I haven't."

"Well, I think she likes you," I offered up, falling into step alongside him once again. "She was looking at you with those gooey eyes."

"Gooey eyes?" Darren chuckled. "You're a dope."

"She was." I laughed.

"I'm surprised she didn't swoon when she saw you." Clearing my throat, I pressed a hand to my forehead and mimicked, "Oh, Darren Lynch. Is that you my eyes can see? Be still, my beating heart!"

"You're such a little shit." My brother laughed.

"And you're a dark horse," I shot back with a wink, ribbing him with my elbow. "Got any more blonds lurking around school, waiting to fall at your feet? Because I'll be happy to take them off your hands."

"Pack it in," he said with a rueful shake of his head. "Honestly, it's not like that. She's just a good friend."

"Don't worry, Dar. I know you're gay. I'm only messing with ya—"

"Jesus Christ, Joey!" Darren hissed, clamping a hand on my shoulder. He looked around us, eyes wild and panicked, before he released a breath and muttered, "Not so loud, okay?"

"Why do you do that?" I demanded, good mood forgotten as I shook his hand off, feeling my temper rise. "Why do you hide who you are?"

He shook his head, blue eyes laced with pain. "Joey."

"No, it's bullshit, Dar," I pushed, unwilling to let it go. "I'm not ashamed of you, and you shouldn't be, either."

"I'm not ashamed of myself." he replied quietly.

"Well, good," I snapped. "Because you don't have shit to be ashamed of."

"Yeah, well, according to Dad, I have."

"Yeah, well, fuck Dad," I spat. "He's the one who should be ashamed of himself, not you."

"You do realize that up until six years ago, being gay was a punishable crime in this country?"

"Yeah, and so were condoms and any other form of birth control." I growled. "Which just goes to show that the laws are bullshit."

"Joe. . ."

"This country is backwards, Darren. You know that," I argued.

"Yeah, it's getting better now, but we both know that the foundations on which our laws are built have a lot less to do with common sense than religion."

"I really don't want to talk about it, Joe."

"Well, I don't want to see you walking around the place with your tail between your legs when you have no reason to." I countered. "It's bullshit, Darren. Every word that comes out of that man's mouth is utter bullshit, so don't let him make you feel bad about yourself. Dad's living in the Dark Ages, so don't you dare let him drag you back there with him."

"What do you propose I do, Joey?" he asked in a weary tone. "Go toe-to-toe with him?"

Yes. "You can take him."

"No, I can't," he replied. "Besides, not every disagreement in life has to result in a dogfight."

"In our lives it does," I corrected hotly. "So you better get your head in the fight and make damn sure that you're the biggest dog."

"Like you, squeaky?"

"I might not be the biggest dog in the fight," I begrudgingly conceded, "but I always have the sharpest teeth."

"Kind of like the saying: It's not the size of the dog that matters, it's the fight in the dog?"

I nodded. "Now you're speaking my language."

Darren gave me a strange look.

"So, in your mind, it's a dog-eat-dog world that we're living in?"

"It's not in my mind, Dar. It's a fact."

"You know," he mused in a melancholy tone, "I can't figure out if that backbone of yours will be your saving grace or your downfall."

"Whichever way it goes is fine by me," I said with a shrug. "Because I couldn't care less."

"That's not true," he argued. "You care."

"No." I laughed humorlessly. "I really don't."

"I need you to start caring, Joey."

"I care," I grumbled. "I care about you, and Shan, and Tadhg, and Ols—"

"I need you to start caring about you, Joe."

"Holy shit."

My feet came to an abrupt stop the instant my eyes landed on the tall blonde with a face I'd recognize anywhere, leaning on the retaining wall at the entrance of the school.

I haven't seen the twins since last school year. They had gone on some trip out of the country to see their family (somewhere in Canada I think).

She looked a lot different from the last time I saw her. Instead of barely meeting four and a half feet tall, she was much taller, now almost the exact same height as her brother, and her hair that used to go all the way down to her hips, was now cut to only reach her shoulders.

She was standing beside her brother, an incredibly annoyed look plastered on her face as he talked to her.

Iris always had that look on her face when Rex talked to her.

"What?" Darren demanded, looking around us. "Where's the fire?"

Struck dumb at the sight of her, and with all notions gone of continuing any further conversation with my brother, I pointed to the girl whose short blonde hair was splaying all around her in the breeze.

"You still got that thing for Iris, huh?" my brother noted. "I thought you got over that."

How could I get over that? Especially now that she looks even better than she ever had before.

I've spent almost every moment I could at the Evergreen's house, which meant always being around Iris—even though Rex was usually there too.

"Jesus Christ." I blew out a breath. "I don't care if you're gay or not. You can't deny that girl is the best-looking thing your eyes have ever seen."

Her gaze flicked to mine. The moment our eyes collided, I felt a pang of heat shoot straight to my chest.

The annoyed look on her face was immediately wiped away and replaced by the brightest smile I have ever seen.

Holy fuck.

She roughly slapped her hand across her brother's shoulder, then pointed towards me while mumbling something to Rex, completely ignoring the glare he sent her for hitting him.

Once they were both looking at me, I waved. Which earned two—very enthusiastic—waves in return.

"Steady up, baby brother." Darren chuckled as he forcibly walked me up the path toward the main building and away from two of my favorite people.

"She's cute, but don't throw your hat in the ring just yet. I promise there will be fifty more girls in your year that look just as lovely."

Doubtful.

"I don't want fifty more girls," I replied, twisting back to find them still watching me. "I just want that girl."

"Oh, to be a first year again." Laughing, Darren dragged me along with him until she was out of sight. "If I've taught you nothing else these past twelve years, then remember this: Keep your temper in check, your head in the books, your ass off the streets, and your hands off girls that look like that."

"Like what?"

"Like they have heartbreak written all over them."

"So in other words, spend the next six years of secondary school living like a priest," I grumbled, breaking free of him when we reached the school. "Where do I sign up?"

"Hey, that's what I did." My brother chuckled, thoroughly amused by my disgust. "It worked well for me."

"Because you're shit craic," I told him. "Seriously, Dar. It's a wonder we're related at all."

"Well, we are," he reminded me before pulling me in for a hug. "I'll always be your brother no matter what, okay? Don't ever forget it."

"What did I tell you?" I hissed, scrambling away from him before anyone saw me hugging my brother of all people. "I should follow through and kick you in the nuts for that."

"Take care of yourself." His voice was thick with emotion as he watched me scowl at him. "I love you."

"Jesus, relax with the love bullshit." I grumbled, feeling acutely uncomfortable. "I'm starting secondary school, asshole, you're not sending me off to war."

He nodded stiffly. "I know."

Feeling off-balance, I eyed him warily before shaking my head and walking off in the direction of the entrance.

Stop.

Don't go.

Something's wrong.

Turn back.

This is all wrong.

"Dar?" Hovering uncertainly, I turned back to find him already walking away. "I'll see you after school, yeah?"

My brother didn't answer.

"Dar?"

He didn't turn back to look at me, either.

"Darren?"

Instead, he pulled his hood up and kept walking away from me.

"He's in a mood, huh?" a girl's voice asked, and I spun around to find none other than Iris Evergreen standing in front of me—and holy fuck if she didn't look even better looking close up.

With all notions of Darren's weird farewell forgotten, I focused entirely on the face looking up at me. She no longer had a baby face, now her cheeks were more defined, her lips softer, her green eyes were practically glowing, and her—now short—hair looked so easy to run my fingers through. She was hands down the best-looking thing my eyes had ever seen.

"Isn't he always"

"Hey Joe!" Rex came hoping up behind her, pushing Iris to the side and nearly tackling me into a hug. "It's been way too long."

Immediately pulling myself away him, I nodded "totally forgot about you two."

That made a large pout form on Rex's lips "not seriously, right? You're my only friend Lynch."

"No, not seriously Rex." I rolled my eyes before focusing on the slightly shorter blonde standing beside him with a huge smile on her face.

"Good." Rex mumbled, his eyes scanning the crowd of students walking past us. "You won't believe me Joe, but I just saw the prettiest girl in the world."

I turned away from his sister to look back over at him. "You're right. I don't."

Rex sighed, leaning backwards "She was just sitting there, looking all beautiful and perfect." Then he leaned back forwards, dropping his head on my shoulder—which I immediately pushed off "it's so hard to explain Joe. You just have to believe me, alright. She was gorgeous."

"Hey" a girl's voice entered our small circle.

All three of us spun towards the direction. Now standing beside Rex was another girl. High cheekbones, pink pouty lips, big green eyes, and hair that was much longer than Iris's.

"Hey" Rex's voice cracked and I had to bite back a laugh.

Was this the girl he had just been talking about?

"You saw me back there," she stated evenly, green eyes snaring Rex.

"I did."

"You kept walking."

He nodded like a fool. "I did."

"Don't do that again."

I turned to meet Iris's eyes, both of us clearly having an opinion on this new girl.

"I won't."

She looked Rex over once more before nodding in approval. "You're beautiful."

"Likewise."

"Hmm." Her lips tipped up. "So, do you have a name?"

"Does it matter?" He countered, resting an arm on Iris as he leaned on her like she was a cane. "We both know that you'll be calling me 'baby' by the end of the day."

I glanced over at the clearly unimpressed and annoyed Iris, who was stuck being used as her brother's wall while he flirted with this strange new girl.

"Is that so?" New girl asked.

Rex released Iris and stepped closer to the girl. "You tell me, blondie."

New girl smiled "Okay, that was seriously smooth."

"Thanks."

"I'm Aoife." She laughed, holding her hand out to Rex.

"Rex," he replied, accepting her small hand in his abnormally large one.

"Rex." She tilted her head to one side and studied him without a hint of shyness. "Your name suits you."

Rex shrugged "probably why my mom picked it." He replied.

"She picked the name before you were even born, you eejit." Iris grumbled, shoving her brother with her elbow.

Rex jumped away from Iris "Ow! Iris!" He whined, his hand attempting to reach the spot she had just hit him. "Why? Why!"

Iris simply shrugged.

Then she turned to her brother's new friend "Your name means radiance and beauty, right?"

She grinned. "You know your Irish."

"Yeah," then she stuck her hand out "I'm Iris."

The new blonde gladly accepted Iris's hand.

"This is Joey." Iris introduced me. "He's kind of grumpy all the time, so don't worry about his bitchy face."

"I do not—" she didn't let me finish that sentence, cutting me off with a hand on my mouth.

"Shh."

"So, what class have you been assigned to?" New girl asked, retrieving her folded-up timetable from the pocket of her pleated skirt. "I'm in First Year 3."

Rex and Iris both pulled out their papers that were their class timetable for the school year.

I knew exactly what class they were in by their facial expressions.

"Same here." They replied in sync.

"So you're as mediocre a student as I am." New girl smiled. "My brother got assigned to First Year 1. That's the class for the brainiacs."

"You're a twin?"

She nodded. "For my sins."

"We're twins." Rex pointed back to Iris, who was half-way through a yawn.

New girl laughed "I can tell."

I get it. The two look like twins. They were nearly identical. If it weren't for the fact that Rex was a boy and Iris was a girl, you probably wouldn't be able to tell them apart, besides the fact that Rex had blue eyes while Iris had green.

"So we're the third smartest class?" Iris asked, rubbing the sleep out of her eyes.

"Or the third thickest." She laughed. "Whichever way your glass is filled."

"Why? How many classes has our year been split into?"

"Four."

"Jesus. That doesn't say much for us, does it?"

"Nope." She grinned back at Iris. "Not a whole pile. So, what primary school are you coming from?"

"Sacred Heart," the twins replied in sync. "You?"

"St. Bernadette's," she said with a grimace. "That's the—"

"All-girls primary school run by the nuns outside of the town?" I winced in sympathy. "Well, that's shit luck on you, huh?"

"Yep. Eight years with the nuns. Can't you see my halo shining?"

"Oh yeah, it's blinding."

"According to Sister Alphonsus, I should be continuing my education in an all-girls environment," she mused, turning back to Rex with a devilish smile. "Apparently, I have a wild streak in me, with a penchant for the male form that no amount of prayer can eliminate." She rolled her eyes. "All because I said I thought the guy playing Jesus in a movie they showed us was gorgeous."

"Gorgeous?"

"What? He was."

"Well, it sounds to me like you need to spend less time on your knees praying and more time—"

"Don't say it," she warned, reaching up to cover Rex's mouth with her hand, much like Iris had done to me a few minutes ago.

"With the male form." He chuckled, peeling her fingers off his lips with his hand.

"So, should I spend more time with the male form in general?" she said, and somehow their fingers were entwined now. "Or with you? Because it's safe to say that I'm impressed with the male form standing in front of me."

I almost laughed at the same time I saw Iris fake a gag.

"Is that your way of telling me that you don't have a boyfriend?"

"No, it's my way of telling you that I will have a boyfriend once you ask me."

"Jesus." Rex's cheeks were practically glowing red "You're not backwards about anything, are you?"

She winked and slid her schoolbag off her shoulder. "Where's the fun in that?"

Clearly thrown off-kilter by this girl, Rex took the bag she held out for him and slung it over his free shoulder.

"There," she said with an approving nod, admiring her bright-pink bag on my best friends shoulder. "That should do it."

"Should do what?"

"Warn the other girls away."

"Did you just mark me with your bag?"

"I sure did," she replied, smiling sweetly up at Rex before turning on her heel and sauntering off in the direction of the school.

"Now, let's go, baby."

Rex turned to look at us with a guilty expression "sorry guy, but. . ." He pointed towards the blonde walking away.

Iris rolled her eyes, shoving his shoulders "go before she leaves you, ya eejit."

And he was gone just like that.

"He's in way over his head." Iris sighed, turning to me with her signature glowing smile.

Iris stepped towards me, wrapping my arm in hers "ready Lynchy?" She stared up at the school like it was about to jump forwards and eat her.

"Only if you are Evergreen." I looked down at her and let her tangle our fingers together.

AUTHOR TALKS!!
This felt super copy and paste, but I feel like a lot of Joey's chapters are gonna be.

Joey and Aoife will be best friends in this because I love their dynamic too much to completely erase it.