They hadn't known each other for long, it had been just a few months since Wooyoung had stumbled into his life. Then why did he feel so much?

San couldn't stop thinking about the boy. The shaking body wiggling between his arms as he sobbed soaking San t-shirt with tears. San didn't say a word, he couldn't. He just held Wooyoung, drawing soothing circles on his back, holding his breath every time his palm bumped into the outline of his scars, perceptible even through the thick fabric of his sweater.

He let the younger bury his face on his chest, he let him get out all his sorrow until he fell asleep. San had never seen Wooyoung so vulnerable, so small and fragile, breaking down just because of a small show of affection. Did he know how much more he deserved? Did he know how precious he was? San could feel his heart break into million pieces as he kept that defenseless body close to his. Shielding it, trying to protect it from all the pain the world had caused him.

When the night before he had left him on his bed, cuddled next to Shiber, San couldn't help but keep staring at the innocent face. Lips slightly parted, finally even breaths leaving that perfect mouth. He wished he could have stayed. He wished he could have just layed down on the mattress and take the puffy dog place, arms entangled around Wooyoung's small body, surrounded by his sweet porfume, listening to his breathing until he had drifted away too.

He wished, but he couldn't.

He perfectly knew that Wooyoung had let go just because of the alcohol in his blood. After the previous night he understood far too well! He knew how scared and traumatized Wooyoung was. How could he blame he? After all he had to live San was surprised that he was still hanging in there, with ups and downs, but willing to try again. Wooyoung was strong but he knew he couldn't step over the invisible boundary that he had set, not until he was ready. But that was okay because he was willing to wait. For Wooyoung, he was willing.

But still, when San woke up that morning he hoped to see the younger in the dining room. He hoped to find him cooking something delicious, physically and mentally recovered. But when he walked inside the room was still empty. No sounds coming from the kitchen either. He drank his coffee patiently waiting, thinking, until he heard the front door opening. Hongjoong and Seonghwa voices becoming audible after a while. San had to recover from his line of thoughts and a cheerful smile appeared on his face when the two boys walked into the same room.

"Good morning lovebirds! How was your night?"

Seonghwa blushed and fixed his turtleneck coughing before he answered, "Good! We had fun!"

Hongjoong smirked in his direction, "Yeah, we did!" but almost immediately he turned to San, face serious once again, "I didn't expect you to be ready! Mingi called me last night, we need to check something in Itaewon, he told me that there's a new club that opened just a few weeks ago, it's called Paradise, Mingi payed a visit on our behalf and apparently the general manager refused to collaborate. I guess it's better if we go talk to him" San didn't like the emphasis on the last few words but just nodded.

"Just give me a minute" he knew he couldn't leave like that or he wouldn't be able to think about anything else for all day, "I want to check on Wooyoung first, then we can go"

Seonghwa eyes blew wide, "Check on him? What happened? Where is he? Did he hurt himself?"

"Hyung, he's fine!" San chuckled, "He just had a little bit too much to drink last night and I want to make sure he's good" he wouldn't tell Seonghwa about Wooyoung confession, about his past, about his scars, especially the invisible ones, but he couldn't completely lie either.

"You let him get drunk?" Seonghwa almost choked on the coffee he had just served himself.

"Are you his mother or what?" Hongjoong chuckled getting San's back and sparing him an annoying discussion with the older, "He's not a baby, Hwa! Let the poor guy be, and you, go and come back fast before we get late!"

San nodded and quickly went upstairs. The corridors were still silent and no noise was coming from Wooyoung's room either. He thought it through couple of times: yes, he really needed to see him but he clearly remembered what happened the last time he had barged in that room unannounced. His hand reached for the handle, We are different from then, it won't happen again, he thought before he decided to open the door.

A dim light was coming through the half- closed shutters, just enough for San to see the small figure still wrapped in his bed under thick blankets. San walked closer watching Wooyoung sleeping soundly. He still had Shiber, cuddling it tightly between his arms, nose sinking deep in the soft fabric. His breath was calm and even, his eyes scrunching every now and then probably due to some vivid dream. A strand of hair had fallen before Wooyoung eyes and San lightly moved it behind his ear, his hair had grown longer and San couldn't help but think at how more beautiful Wooyoung was getting every day.

San had just barely touched him but he noticed Wooyoung eyes open suddenly, he flinched away from the hand still extended over his head, eyes darkened with a scared shadow before they fixed in San worried ones whom seeing Wooyoung reaction was quick to take a step back.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to wake you up! Go back to sleep is still very early" San whispered.

Wooyoung relaxed once again after hearing the older voice, one hand peaking out of the blanket and searching for San's, he interlocked their fingers just like the night before but this time he brought the touch to his face, just where San fingertips had brushed him a few seconds before. San heart skipped a beat at that gesture, he was always so scared to touch Wooyoung and every time that had happened he was always the one who initiated it. Sometimes San had wondered if Wooyoung was accepting his caresses just because he didn't want to be disappointing, but as the veiny hand leaded his to puffy cheeks all his bad thoughts disappeared.

"What are you doing here?" Wooyoung asked, voice still sleepy as his eyes closed once again enjoying the warm presence.

San thumb caressed the soft cheek smiling with fondness, "I just wanted to see if you were all right"

Wooyoung nodded, "I'm okay. My head is killing me and I think I'll throw up if I move, but I'm okay" he chuckled or at least he tried before a soft whine left his lips, his eyebrows frowned, "Okay, I feel like shit" he admitted.

"Just try to sleep" San couldn't help but stare at how beautiful Wooyoung looked even in the morning, it didn't matter the puffy eyes or the messy hair, Wooyoung still looked stunning, "Seonghwa-hyung will be here if you need anything. I think I'll be late tonight so don't wait for me in the museum, okay?" Wooyoung nodded and sank further down under the blankets, "I'll be going then, rest well baby" and with one last caress San hand was gone.

Wooyoung's stomach made a flip at the nickname and his eyes opened once again to see San figure walk away, "Sanie" he called in a flebile voice, but enough for San to hear him and turn, "Thank you for Shiber, he smells just like you, I like it"

"He's yours, take good care of him for me!" San couldn't help but smile, I hope you will think about me every time you have him between your arms, he thought but he didn't dare to say it out loud. Wooyoung's eyes had closed once again, San gave him one last look before the walked away, closing the door at his back.

Hongjoong was waiting for him just outside of the room, back leaning against the wall, arms crossed, face serious.

"Ready to go" San fixed his tie and walked in his direction.

"Before we leave, I called Mingi, he will be there as well with his men. I know you don't like his methods but he's on our side and he's strong. His family is loyal to you, always been, if you could–"

"Aren't our men enough? Why did you call him?"

"Voices say that the Im family has something to do with the new club" a shiver ran down San spine when he heard the name "Maybe they're trying to extend their territories and we have huge businesses in that district, we can't get there unprepared. Changkyun is not someone to underestimate San, and Mingi is not a bad guy, he's just a bit short tempered"

"A bit short tempered? For fuck sake, he beat a man to death in a public place! What if it happens again? We can't get that kind of attention, he's a huge risk Joong-hyung!"

"It won't happen again, San! That was just a case, consider it an isolated episode, 'kay?"

San inhaled deeply before nodding, "One chance! He fucks up we're done! Tell me about Changkyun, what have you heard?" he asked as he went to the front door.

They walked to the car while Hongjoong kept informing San about the upcoming situation: all they heard were voices, nobody had proofs that Changkyun had actually expanded his territories to Itaewon and even if voices were true it didn't mean "war". The Choi's never had problems with the Im family and Hongjoong was sure that they could find a solution without using violence.

"So why did you ask for Mingi's help?"

Hongjoong raised an eyebrow, "Are you really that naive? I will avoid any fight as long as I can but if Changkyun isn't on our same page I don't want to get there unprepared" one of his hands went to his waist and touched the hidden gun San knew was there.

The drive continued in a thick silence, only interrupted by the outside noises growing louder as they entered the district. Hongjoong parked not so far from the club which could be seen on the opposite side of the road just a few meters ahead: a neon sign showing the name "Paradise", the light was off and the doors were shut. It looked extrimelly quiet and creepy and San thought that Itaewon always had a weird vibe under the day light.

"Let's go!" Hongjoong opened his car door and San did the same, walking his same direction to a darker alley.

He noticed many of his father's men following them from a short distance. In front of them another small group made its way to their direction, San tapped Hongjoong shoulder and the shorter boy stopped, immediately making eye contact with a tall man leading the smaller gorup, San could see a large smile apearing on his face.

"Song Mingi-ssi, is good to see you!" Hongjoong greeted him extending one hand towards the other.

"What's with the formality, hyung?" Mingi laughed and quickly grabbed Hongjoong's hand pulling him in a thight hug, "'s good to see you too!"

San rolled his eyes, "I don't want to interrupt but I think we better hurry"

"Choi San-ssi" Mingi stepped back and turned to face San, he bowed his head out of respect, "I've heard about your loss and I'm truly sorry. My family stood with your father and I plan to do the same with you, you have our support" he bowed again before he felt one hand on his shoulder letting him stand straight.

"Thank you Mingi, I will remember that!" he was about to add something else when one of Mingi's man called his boss name while running in his direction.

"He knows we're here!" he whispered so that only the three man could hear him, "He sent a man, he's waiting for you"

"How did he–" Mingi started but was cut halfway.

"Doesn't really matter, does it? Lead the way" San wasn't that surprised, so it really was Im. Changkyun wasn't so foolish to show up in hostile territory unprepared so he didn't flinch when his men were stopped at the door of the club and only the three of them got access inside. Surprisingly nobody checked if they were armed, feeling his gun pressing against his skin made San feel a bit more confident as he followed the big man.

The thick wooden door closed behind their backs leaving them in almost complete darkness, only a soft neon blue bulb was lighting up a long staircase leading to a even darker space a floor down. Their steps creeply echoed, the metal sounds of their heels hitting the stairs resounding through the long corridor. The man walking in front of San stopped at the end of the perron, another thick closed door in front of them. The man knocked a couple of times and it didn't take long before someone came and opened it.

The light coming from inside the room had nothing to do with the creepy blue neon that they left behind: actually the colours were similar, a soft bluish-purple ring lamps hanging from the ceiling enlightened the whole room. It was huge! Expensive leather couches with refined white marble tables were placed all around it, some bigger at the edges of the room, while smaller ones were delimiting a shining dancefloor along with also marbled columns. It was empty and just a soft jazz music was playing in the background not really matching the atmosphere of the place. The man that opened the door leaded them to a huge bar at the end of the room that San hadn't noticed: a man, back facing the entrance, was sitting on one of the stools sorrounded by many other body guards looking more like apes than humans, when he heard the footsteps approaching he turned, a handsome smile on his face.

"Choi San, long time no see!" he completly ignored Hingjoong and Mingi standing next to San, "Can I offer you something to drink? Our gin selection is excellent if I dare say"

"I don't have the habit of drinking alcohol in the morning, thank you"

"Mhm, not a drinker then, I guess you have other flaws" he smirked standing up and approaching San, "Speaking of which, how's your five billions sex slave doing?" when he noticed San jaw stiffen the smirk on his face grew wider, "I hope he's worth the money, probably gives you heads that send you straight to heaven, yeah I remember his mouth looked just perf–"

San didn't let him finish grabbing Changkyun by the collar, "Say one more fucking word and the only mouth you'll worry about will be your broken one" he hissed through clenched teeth.

A loud laugh escaped Changkyun throat, "There, there!" he patted San shoulder, "I was just joking no need to feel so offended" his eyes left those of San looking behind his back, a serious face replacing his smirk, "I'm sure Choi San-ssi was just joking too, you can put your guns away guys"

When San heard the last sentence his eyes immediately moved to his surroundings: Hongjoong and Mingi were standing back to back just behind San, guns pointing to the men sorrounding them. The two of them against at least twelve much bigger and better armed men. There were many and all of them had a gun directed to San's head. Fuck this!

Even if he was itching at the thought of hitting the arrogant boy right on his face he decided he'd better leave Changkyun collar taking a step back and allowing a fake smile to appear on his lips, "Yeah, just joking!" he turned to face Hongjoong, arms still up, they made eye contact and for a second San swore he was about to shoot him in the head for the glare he was throwing him, "All good guys, put your guns away!" The two boys cautiously lowered their weapons but Hongjoong's lips remained tense in a thin line, eyes shooting flares to San direction.

"So, what is the Choi San doing in my newest club if not to drink?" Changkyun fixed his shirt and walked past them, a finger signaling to follow him as he went to seat on one of the largest couches in a darker corner of the huge room.

San sat down in front of him, "I was wondering why of all places your newest club was opened in Itaewon, you know most of the district belongs to me"

"Straight to the point I see" he chuckled, "I know that most of Itaewon belonged to Choi Jongcheol, your father, not to you San-ah and, please let me be frank as well, you're not him! Your dogs here are more scary than you are" his eyes moved to Hongjoong and Mingi for the first time, "But–"

Changkyun stopped, he brought a sigarette to his lips and inhaled deeply as he lighted it up before speaking again, "But I don't want to cause you any problems, actually I think that we can help each other, what do you say?"

"I don't think I will need your–"

"Huhuhu!" this time is was Changkyun to interrupt him clicking his tongue disappointed, "No need to rush, I think you need to think it better, yeah? With your father gone I guess you could use some help so don't be hasty, all right?" he blew a cloud of smoke to his face, "I have things to do but you will hear from me, think it through in the mean while, will ya?"

He didn't wait for an answer as he stood up, pushed the half smoked cigarette in the ashtray and told one of his apes to escort the three boys out, "And if you will ever rethink about that gin come and say hi, I won't mind if you decide to bring that slave of yours, we could have some fun together"

San was about to reply, anger building fast inside of him, but Hongjoong shushed him by grabbing his arm and pulling him to the door and back to the stairs, walking their way up to the exit, "Don't fall for it twice, you idiot!" he whispered through clenched teeth.

San let his body being dragged away, his feet robotically moving as he finally felt the cold sunshine hitting his skin once again. Hongjoong didn't stop though and kept walking 'til they reached a quiet alley. With the hand on his wrist gone, San felt like somebody ignited a bomb inside his body, the anger finally leaving it in a raging explosion.

"Aaaah!" he yelled in frustration, his leg moving against his will as he kicked with all his strength a trash bin that happened to be nearby, the metal clattering on the ground as the garbage flew all around.

Hongjoong didn't react, his eyes fixed on a spot far away, chewing on his thumb, mind clearly occupied thinking of a possible strategy, but Mingi eyes widened, "And I thought I was impulsive!" he chuckled taking a step closer to San who was still heavily breathing.

He put a hand on San shoulder but the younger flinched, pushing it away, eyes menacingly glaring at Mingi, "Don't you touch me!" he hissed.

"Yah! What's your problem, huh? We almost got our brains blown off because of you in there! Can you calm the fuck down?" he pushed San as well who stumbled on his feet caught off guard.

He was quick to regain himself and step on Mingi personal space, hands colliding with his shoulders pushing him again, "I didn't ask for you to follow me like a puppy, if you have a problem you can always call it off!" it sounded more like a growl.

Mingi stepped forward, their foreheads collided as his hands grabbed San collar. The shorter pushed back with a strenght that Mingi wasn't aware of, he was about to throw the first punch when Hongjoong stepped in between dividing them.

San was about to bite back at the older but he couldn't since an unexpected blow hit his jaw, he stumbled back, hand raising to cup his own face, the pain slowly taking him back to reason. When he raised his gaze once again he had to face a very angry Hongjoong standing in front of a shocked Mingi, his fist still clenched and shaking.

"Mingi is right, San-ah! You have to calm the fuck down or we won't get out of this!" he hissed.

Hearing it from Mingi was one thing but the same words repeated from Hongjoong's mouth had a completly different effect of San who lowered his eyes.

"I'm sorry" he whispered, "It's just that–" he paused, eyes finding those of Hongjoong once again, "You don't know, hyung! You don't know what Wooyoung had to live, that piece of shit has no right to speak his na–"

"San-ah! Shut the fuck up!" Hongjoong yelled, "I'm sorry for whatever happened to Wooyoung but you're so stupid if you let that asshole get to you that easily! He has no way to hurt Wooyoung, he's safe now and it's clear as day light that he was using that to make you nervous. And you bought it like an idiot! Do you understand the risk you put us under back there, huh?"

"I do and I already said that I'm sorry! I didn't mean to snap, okay?" he did feel guilty but he didn't like the way Hongjoong was scolding him in front of Mingi, probably Changkyun words had breached much further than what San had expected, "I'm not my father, I haven't even started and I already fucked up!" he felt his knees giving out, suddenly incredibly weak, so he just sat on the dirty ground, back leaning against the wall as he closed his eyes trying to make his breath even once again.

"San-ah, you know I didn't mean anything like that!" Hongjoong crouched down next to him.

"I know hyung, but it doesn't change the fact that I'm not cut for this! Changkyun is right: you're much better than me at all this shit, I'm impulsive, I'm no strategist, I'm not–"

"Crap the bullshit!" it was Mingi's voice who interrupted him this time, "I've seen you at the auction, the way you stood up to Im is not something that everyone would do! You have your values San, like I have mine, it doesn't matter, but you have something that scares Changkyun otherwise he wouldn't challenge you this openly!"

San didn't answer but kept looking at Mingi intently trying to understand how much he meant of what he had said.

"Mingi's right! And we got what we wanted San-ah, don't you realise? We can't fight the Ims, we're not strong enough for that but he wants to find a sort of agreement! We haven't heard his proposal, I say let's wait and see what comes next, yeah?" he put one hand on San shoulder who accepted the touch this time, while his other extended to help him up.

San smiled accepting it, "And I'm sorry for that punch but sometimes I can't control my impulsiveness either! Hope I didn't hurt you too bad" Hongjoong chuckled checking San jaw.

"Sometimes I forget how strong you are even if you're tiny!" he was about to laugh at Hongjoong's face but the older tighten his grab on San jaw making him wail in pain.

They had a long afternoon after that, they knew Changkyun wasn't one to underestimate, they couldn't face him unprepared once again so they decided to spend the rest of the day thinking at all the possible scenarios and when it would take place. Unexpectedly for San, Mingi had lots of good connections and even if they knew they still were at a great disadvantage the gap didn't feel that big anymore.

It was already late when the boys finally walked back inside the house. It was dark and empty, not finding Seonghwa anywhere Hongjoong decided to go straight to bed wishing San a goodnight.

It was almost 2 in the morning and the heavy day had started to weight on San shoulders too, his jaw was still sore, his head ached and he could feel his eyes getting heavier, but still... For all the day he had hoped to come back home soon enough to wish Wooyoung goodnight, to spend even just a couple of minutes with the other. The more the day went on the more he felt the need to see the younger, but it was too late now, wasn't it? San thought at how tired Wooyoung had looked during the morning. He wouldn't disturb his sleep, after all he was sure he would have seen him in the morning and he realized he really needed ti crush on his bed too.

He shook his head trying to convince himself that it was just a childish whim, he was just very tired and needy but he could wait until the morning after. He was about to open his door, finally firm on his decision, when he heard a noise. He stopped in his motion keeping his ears back on that sudden whine.

Silence...

He waited more, counting the seconds passing.

One, two, three, four...

I probably heard wrong, he thought, I'm just very tir–

But then there it was again, a loud short whine. It sounded muffled, but San was sure.

It came from Wooyoung's bedroom.

He hurriedly walked to his door leaning on the wooden surface and listened carefully. He could still hear a few suffocated sounds coming from inside, but he was hesitant, he couldn't just barg–

"LET ME GO!" this time the scream was unmistakable.

San could feel his blood freezing inside his veins and just one name started repeating through his mind: Changkyun!

Wooyoung voice echoed loud in another pained scream and it was enough for San to move: his hands turned the handle and he swang the door open thanking Wooyoung for not having locked it. He jumped inside ready to fight whoever was trying to hurt Wooyoung, but–

The room was empty and dark.

The windows were closed, shutters completly down and a body was convulsevly moving under the blankets. Alone.

"D-don't touch me!" another whine, words loud and clear coming from the silhouette moving terrified in his bed.

San closed the door and walked in the boy's direction, "Wooyoung!" he tried to call him but his words were covered by another scream, short and scared. He didn't think it twice when he found himself at the edge of the bed, his hands untangling the body from the thick blankets. As expected Wooyoung eyes were closed, brows forrowed as he shook uncontrollably and moved on his spot panicking at some vivid nightmare. San touched his shoulder and he could feel the fabric of the pajama completly dump in sweat sticking to his palm. He shook the younger gently, calling his name once again.

"Let me go! Let me go! LET ME GO!" the screams increased in volume, the more San tried to shake him awake the louder they got.

San tried to switch on the lamp on the bedside table maybe the light would have waked Wooyoung up, but that didn't work either, the boy kept convulsing in his sleep.

"Wooyoungie, Wooyoungie please wake up!" he called louder incredibly worried and shaking the body now almost violently. That's when Wooyoung's eyes opened, dark and terrified.

He pushed San hand away with a loud whine, scooting back on the mattress, Away, away, away, I have to get away!, 'til he reached the very end of it and his back hit the headboard.

He could still feel them, strong hands keeping him still, fat greasy fingers pressing on his neck cutting the air away. And then the pain came. He should have get used to it by now but no. All the times it felt like a burning hell-fire, it felt like he was going to rip, break apart. He could feel the warm sticky blood running down his thighs. Inside outside inside outside inside – is it done yet? Is not, not until the pain turns into a numb foggy feeling. Until he couldn't tell if he was still screaming or if it was just inside his mind. Is it done yet? Make it stop.

"Make it stop!" he screamed, his fingers grabbing his hair and pulling with strength. Not enough, make it stop! Make it stop! Make it stop! Fists hitting hands slapping. Stop it! Stop this!

"...ooyoung-ah!"

A known voice cut through the buzzing sound resounding inside his head.

Please, please, please, please, don't hurt me. He brought his knees to his chest trying to escape from that hand still extending in his direction, but he couldn't escape, could he? It's over, isn't it? He wished he could disappear as he started sobbing asking for mercy.

"N-no, no, p-please! I-I would do a-anything but please– Please don't hurt me! Leave m-me alone!" he kept repeating, face hidden behind his palms, as tears were streaming down his cheeks and his body kept shaking uncontrollably.

But then he heard it again, soft and warm.

"Wooyoungie, it's me!" San spoke in a gentler tone of voice.

Who is he? Wooyoung eyes peaked from behind his fingers.

"You're safe, it was just a dream!"

In the dark he could distinguish those cat like eyes that were looking at him with fondness, a dimpled smile appearing on the worried face when they made eye contact.

"It's all right baby, it's me! You're safe, I promise"

"S-sanie?" the name slipped through his lips unconsciously and he saw the handsome boy nodding.

"Yeah, I'm here, you're okay!"

I'm okay. I'm not dreaming, am I? Wooyoung kept looking at the boy standing a few steps from him. Is this real?

"Am I dreaming?" his voice came out shaky and hoarse, if I move will he disappear?

San smiled fondly and shook his head, he hesitantly extended again one hand in Wooyoung's direction, palm up, he stopped a few inches from the boy, waiting, "You're not dreaming, I'm real"

Can I–

Wooyoung extended one hesitant hand.

Can I touch it? If I do so–

He looked at San: he was still timidly smiling, his eyes never leaving Wooyoung's face like he was trying to read every emotion passing through his expressions.

They're hands were just centimeters apart now, closer, closer 'til they really made contact and–

San was still there. It wasn't a dream. San palm was soft and a bit sweaty. He touched it more, fingers exploring cautiously the warm skin moving from his knuckles to his wrist were he could hear the fast beating of San's heart. It was warm and familiar. Wooyoung sighted and brought that hand to his face, San was quick to cup his cheek and starting to brush it softly.

"Lay down, go back to sleep" he said while with his other hand he moved the blankets to make space for Wooyoung.

But the younger didn't move, he didn't leave his hand and kept it pressed on his cheek indulging on San touch. They silence lingered softly between them for a few seconds before Wooyoung found the courage to say just two words, but that felt like the most difficult of his life.

"Don't go!" he felt his cheeks burning and he thanked the dim light for hiding his otherwise evident blush.

San didn't reply, he just kept staring at him, pupils shaking vividly as he held their gaze. Wooyoung didn't know where he found the courage when he moved, scooting on the mattress to make space for San. He moved the hand away from his cheek, pulling slightly at it to encourage the older to lay next to him.

"Please, stay!" he whispered again.

"Wooyoung, I–" the hesitation in San words made Wooyoung panic as he felt more tears prickling his eyes.

"Just for t-tonight! I swear I-I won't ask you anything else! I can't–" it was difficult to breath, the air feeling thick and hot once again, "I don't want to b-be alone, if– if–"

"Wooyoungie–"

"If you go it will c-come back! I can't! San, I'm– I'm scared! I don't w-want to–" but he didn't need to add anything else because in a second San body was moving.

His arms circled Wooyoung's shoulders, hands resting gently on his head and nape pulling him in a warm hug, until his face was buried against San chest. His sweet porfume invading his lungs and making him feel dizzy. San slowly let himself lower completely on the bed bringing Wooyoung with him.

"I'm here!" he felt San breath between his hair, lips brushing softly against his head, "I'll stay, just breath for me, okay?"

Wooyoung nodded against his chest, the fabric of San shirt tickling his skin as he did so.

"You're safe here, you're with me and nobody will lay a finger on you" the sweet voice kept whispering, "You're safe, I promise! Nobody can hurt you"

Wooyoung felt his breath slowly finding a stable rhythm once again, he realized that he wasn't shaking as much as before and the tears had completely stopped. He felt better. He felt safe.

He felt...

Suddenly it was all too overwhelming, he could feel San chest under his fingers raising and lowering with his breath. The taut, sculpted muscles tensing every time he moved. Wooyoung felt his cheeks burning hot once again and he just couldn't stay still anymore. He moved his head back, eyes looking up as he inhaled deeply. Or at least he tried but his breath got stuck half way when he noticed how close they were. San face was only centimeters from his, he could feel his warm breath on his skin.

"So pretty" he heard San whisper as his eyes wondered on each detail of Wooyoung's face, "You're so pretty, Wooyoung!" he repeated, one of his hands cupped his face, fingers brushing the skin between his jaw and neck, moving up to touch the little mole under Wooyoung's eye, smoothing away the lines of almost dried tears.

Wooyoung just couldn't look away when their eyes met, it became difficult to breath once again but it didn't feel constricting this time. A warm wave kept flowing through Wooyoung's body, from his stomach to his chest to his head, he felt his skin becoming unbearably hot wherever San touched him, but it wasn't suffocating. It felt good! It felt healing, like his fingers were taking away all the dirt left from the hands of Wooyoung's dream. He felt San holding his breath when his fingers brushed close to the younger's mouth, a flashback passing through Wooyoung's mind but this time he didn't flinch. He didn't move away but he parted his lips instead letting San thumb brush against the little beauty mark on his lower lip.

"Wooyoung..." he heard San call his name like in a prayer.

Wooyoung opened his eyes not really remembering when he had closed them but when he did to look up he caught San staring, eyes moving from his to his mouth. San lips were also slightly parted as his breath came out short and erratic.

"Wooyoung, can I–" he repeated but stopping half way biting his lower lip.

"Sanie?" it was Wooyoung's turn to interrogate the other.

"Can I kiss you?" the question came out in a rushed whisper and Wooyoung swore he could see San cheeks blushing a bit as he kept the eye contact.

Wooyoung nodded, his hand moving by its own as he found it cupping San's, fingers interlacing on Wooyoung's face, "Please!"

He could see a sparkle lighting behind San eyes as he started to lean in even so slowly, gaze fixed on Wooyoung like he was scared that the younger might change his mind and scoot away. But Wooyoung didn't, how could he when he was so bewitched by the other? How could he when the only thing he could see in that moment were pouty, beautiful lips getting every second closer? San breath was on his mouth now, it smelled like coffee and Wooyoung loved it.

San tilted his head, and Wooyoung didn't dare move, he couldn't even if he wanted to. Their noses brushed and he felt the way his entire body shivered. He was scared, terrified actually but he didn't want to stop. He wanted it. He wanted San. He could hear how nervous San was as well by his breathing. He could feel the warm puffs of air coming from San's mouth on his own lips. He could almost taste him.

"Woo–" one last breath, Wooyoung's name on his tongue, and San found the courage to close the distance.

Wooyoung's lips were so incredibly soft, much more than what San had expected. When they found each other a small gasp left Wooyoung's throat but he didn't scoot away. Actually he moved his lips against San's, his kisses were soft and tender, like he was pouring so many emotions into them.

Wooyoung didn't know kissing could feel like this. How could he? He had never been kissed before, not this way. Not with the tenderness of San. He couldn't help but clench his fists on San shirt, pulling him closer almost desperate. San body against his, his hands caressing his face, holding him close, the softness of those lips that were moving so slowly against his. It really felt... good! The ache in his chest was finally gone, instead, butterflies replaced it in his stomach, making themselves at home there. Everything felt just so overwhelming that he had to lean back, mouths disconnecting as Wooyoung took a deep breath and looked up.

San opened his eyes and looked at him and oh! He was breathtaking, Wooyoung couldn't help but stare as his heart thud wildly in his chest.

"I've been wanting to do that for so long" he whispered as he tucked a strand of hair behind Wooyoung's ear, it was getting longer making him look even more handsome, San thought.

Like this, so close to Wooyoung's face, San felt like he could finally and truly look. He admired his cute ears, his cheeks, those stars in his eyes which sometimes looked like they were shining at him. Finally, he looked down at Wooyoung's lips. He focused on the beauty mark on the bottom of his lip, the one that had him bewitched so many times, and without even thinking twice he leaned in to kiss Wooyoung again.

There was less grace this time, lips moving messily as they tried to find a rhythm that could suit them. Wooyoung kept exhaling little whimpers every time San moved his hand to caress his skin. Jaw, neck, cheeks, nape, until it settled right behind his ear, thumb brushing where Wooyoung jawline started, keeping him close, pulling him in.

"Wooyoungie–" San had to breath whispering his name right against his lips before he dived in again.

When Wooyoung mouth opened yet another time San couldn't hold back anymore. His tongue poked Wooyoung lower lip timidly asking for access to which the younger gladly obliged melting even more between the other's arms. They kissed more passionately but without loosing any tenderness, and still the wet sound of their lips and tongues moving against each other was starting to have an effect on San, his pants feeling a little too tight right now.

Thinking about the cute beauty mark that had been driving him crazy, he sucked on Wooyoung's bottom lip, which resulted in the boy releasing a breathy moan. He never thought kissing could feel like this. Wooyoung was driving him wild, but–

He couldn't.

He stopped the kiss, slowly putting some space between their lips. He kept Wooyoung close though, looking at him with the most fond eyes. Wooyoung stared back, lips still slightly open, wet and swollen, moving in short, erratic breaths. His hand moved from San chest to gently trace his fingers on his face, starting from his eyebrows, to his nose, to his lips, indulging there.

"You should try to sleep" San whispered, placing soft wet kisses on Wooyoung fingertips.

"Will you stay?" he asked, worriedly searching for San eyes.

San didn't answer but just nodded, pulling Wooyoung small body closer to his, holding his head against his body. Wooyoung let a relaxed sight escape his mouth as he listened to the fast heartbeat behind that taut chest.

"Goodnight, Sanie" he whispered leaving one last kiss there.

Is it how it feels to be loved? Wooyoung couldn't help but wonder as he let himself dream away.