3:30pm- Yamaguchi residence.

Yamaguchi threw himself onto the bed in his bed, tears streaming down his face as he gipped his pillow within his hands. Green hair sticking to his face due to the wetness. Today was the worst, just when he was finally breaking through the hole he dug himself due to the Aoba Johsai game. He was so stupid.

Ukai was always suspicious of his place on the team since that game. Sure, the coach never said it, but Yamaguchi could tell. Years of bullying helped him realised when those around him were disappointed because of something he did. Yamaguchi had worked himself to the bone whenever he had time, and between family and school breathing down his neck it wasn't a lot. Everyone else on the team was so much better than him, and they barely even failed! He wasn't worth Karasuno Volleyball. They only kept him out of pity...

Just like Tsukki did.

Yamaguchi knew, he knew he was only around because no one else stood up for the position. If it weren't for that, he would've been dropped ages ago. But he never was... So he got stupidly attached.

Stupidly thought that maybe he belonged among the others.

Stupidly believed that Hinata, Yachi, Suga... Tsukki actually wanted to spend their precious time around him.

He even fell in love. Tsukki made him feel special. That he was one of a kind. Now he knew it was all his mind playing cruel tricks on him. Taunting him for trusting so easily, pushing him back down just like those bullies did back when he was a kid. Dangling everything he ever wanted right in front of him just to pull it away the moment he went to grab it.

Because he didn't deserve it.

Yamaguchi didn't deserve Karasuno... He never did, and he never will.

His parents weren't home, they had some sort of business conference for the next week, they left last night. Giving their son a chaste kiss and a promise to return home safely. They rarely talked to him most days. Work too much for them to have much free time together, it was because of him. Ever since Yamaguchi was born they experienced financial problems, from the passing of his grandparents when he was 12, and their will meaning his mother had to sacrifice her childhood home just because she felt bad Yamaguchi would have to move schools.

His parents were always so busy because of him, another mouth to feed and care for when they really didn't have to. Kids were so much work and effort, and that's all he did for his parents, they were so happy when he joined volleyball as a kid. Probably happy Yamaguchi was finally doing something worth everything they poured into him, he refused to bring up his declining mental health, refused to put even more pressure on those he cared about. Those he wanted to keep happy. The only thing that would happen from him opening up is pity. All Yamaguchi was good for was pity.

He was just some charity case others could use to make themselves feel better about what they had achieved. The only thing he could do to make things better for everyone would be to just... die.

Sure those around him would be sad. His school would probably attempt to use it as an excuse to act as though they care about mental health, ignoring the fact that when Yamaguchi had tried to open up about what he was feeling he was shot down so quickly. But that would only be temporary, the school would move on. Karasuno would find another number 12 for their volleyball team. Someone who could actually serve the fucking ball for once in his life instead of letting everybody down. Tsukki could make new friends, he had already if Yamaguchi included those 3rd years and that 2nd year from their training camp. They would help Tsukki become better at volleyball, do more for him in a year than Yamaguchi could ever do in his entire life. His parents could adopt another kid. Someone who would actually make them proud and earn their love the way he should've.

They would all move on, whether he was here or not. If anything Yamaguchi could barely think of a reason for him to stay alive anymore, even if he did he would just end up alone. So what was wrong with making it happen on his own terms... That way he actually had control over it. It would hurt less this way. Than no one would feel guilty breaking the 'relationship' they had. Yamaguchi could do that much for them.

He tore out a sheet of paper from his notebook, grabbing a pencil from his desk. Yamaguchi had thought about what he would say if he ever died. So this shouldn't be too hard to write.

Dear Everyone,

You're probably a bit confused, maybe upset as to why this happened. Trust me youre lying I probably would be to. But I wouldn't spend so much time 'grieving' over this. Theres nothing any of you could've done to change this outcome. This was my choice. I hope none of you are too mad at me because of it.

To mum and dad:

Like I said. Neither of you are to blame for any of this. I love you both so so much. You've sacrificed so much for me over my life, money, time. And I just want to give you both a chance to recover what you've lost. Give another kid, someone more deserving. The chances you shouldn't have gave to me. Maybe finally go on a decent holiday without worrying that I won't enjoy, or like it. Make yourself happy again.

To Karasuno:

You've all been so nice amazing to me. The time within this team has been great. But we all know that I don't have the same skill level as any of you, I'll be honest I'm surprised you didn't kick me off after nationals. I shouldn't be on this team, someone else, who can get you points, who can easily carry you to nationals just like you all could on your own. Number 12 isnt important. I trust you'll find someone better to fill that role. Thank you for giving me the best year of my life. And don't dwell too much on the issues of finding a new teammate.

Yamaguchi paused, he was aware that there was mainly one other person he knew deserved their own section, someone who he had a lot to say to, and no way to put it into words.

To Kei Tsukki

You can finally move on huh. Must feel great finally being free from the mess of a guy that forced himself into your life. In all seriousness. Thank you for hanging around me for this long. Must've been stressful, but I appreciate all you've done for me. It's been so nice spending time with you, I've learnt so much more about dinosaurs than I ever thought I would. Being your friend, even if you never thought we really were, has been great. Now you can make someone else feel the same.

I love you Kei. And I know that telling you this in a situation like now isn't very cool of me. But I don't think I could do this without telling you. But now you can move on knowing someone does. That you aren't unlovable. That one day you will wake up next to the person of your dreams, and be happy. Happier than I think I'd ever make you.

Don't change your dreams, anyone.

Fly high,

Yamaguchi

The green haired boy watched as his tears stained the page. Freely sobbing with every word. This was what they deserved. None of those he cared about needed to deal with him any longer. It would be better this way. They could all move on and live without his being a burden looming over them.

With the reasoning sorted, Yamaguchi moved off his bed an headed to the medicine cabinet in the kitchen, opening it to the pills staring directly back at him. Almost asking him to take them, he grabbed them and a bottle of water from the fridge before sitting on one of the chairs next to the dining table. He opened the bottle, staring at the white solid pills inside of it. Yamaguchi once thought this moment would be something terrifying, maybe even frightening him. But all he felt was numb.

He lifted up the bottle, feeling the cold hit his lips, opening his mouth.

He swallowed almost all of what he could fit in.

5:43pm

Hinata was tasked with collecting Yamaguchi from his home, the team had decided to hold an extra session to keep up practice a few days ago. Yamaguchi had agreed to come in a haze, but hadn't shown up quite yet. No one could get him to answer their calls and messages, not even Tsukishima, who seemed kind of panicked when he finally arrived at the local park (where they agreed to meet) only to find is friend wasn't there.

It had been a while since Hinata had needed to go to Yamaguchi's House, but luckily he actually remembered the route. There were quite a few houses in the area, as the orange haired boy arrived to the location he remembered from his last visit back before their last exam, where Hinata recalls his frantic search for study help.

Knocking on the door, the boy watched as he saw no movement from the inside, no lights were on either. Suspicious. Hinata reached into his jacket pocket, dialling up Sugawara's number.

"Ah! Hinata, is everything ok?" he heard the bouncing of volleyballs lightly in the background, where they already starting without him??

"I'm just a bit confused. I don't think Yamaguchi's home. There's not even any cars here."

"Hmm... Tsukishima!" There was a gruff response and a small quiet conversation Hinata wasn't able to hear.

"According to our lovely number 11 here Yamaguchi is home alone, his parents are currently at a business trip and will remain so for the next week. You have permission to enter the house, Tsukishima says there's a key under the potted plant on your left." Hinata looked at the large, almost fake, plant next to the door, picking it up slightly as he grabbed the silver key underneath it. Putting it into the door hole, unlocking it with ease before entering.

"Yamaguchi-kun? Is everything ok? You didn't show up to practice and Stingyshima seems upset. Now come on I wanna hit some of Kageyama's serves!" He walked through the hall, making sure he quickly took off his shoes before looking around for any sign of the other first year.

"Any answer Hinata?" Suga questioned on the phone. Worry laced in the undertone of his voice. Hinata was about to say something when he saw a small shadow in the kitchen, illuminated by the street lights outside. He turned to the door, opening it to a sight he thought he'd never see.

Yamaguchi's passed out body, hand holding onto an empty pill bottle.

"AAAAAAAAHHHHHH!" Hinata heard his scream echo through the room, probably bursting Suga's eardrums in the process.

"Hinata?! What is it?!"

"I-I don't, Yama- He's not awake, he's barely breathing!" Hinata felt himself shake as he ran in front of his friends body, checking the small rise and fall of his chest, it was barely noticeable, Yamaguchi had been writhing in pain for a while, tears were staining his face as well as blood dried upon the bottom of his mouth and his shirt.

"Shit! Daichi! Yamaguchi needs an ambulance right now!" Hinata's phone had been discarded on the floor in the mess, but he could here the mass of concerned voices coming from Suga's end. Everyone questioning what the hell was happening. The phone was disconnected as Hinata went to touch Yamaguchi's face, feeling the salty tears stream down his own face, barely believing the sight that was right before his eyes. His teammate, his friend. Right here on the verge of death.

"Yamaguxhu please. Don't leave us. We need you. We haven't graduated yet, you haven't perfected every serve yet. I need you to wake up...Please!" He was fully sobbing as the words poured out in a jumbled mess. The paramedics burst through the door and immediately separated Hinata from the room, giving him time to grab his phone before being sent back outside just as the rest of the team sprinted to the house.

"Hinata! Where the fuck is he?!" Tsukishima was next to him immediately, fear covering every inch of his body. Hinata pointed inside the house, professionals covering the living room as shouts could be heard.

"Th-They sent me out here... I don't know if they'll let you in until they leave." Suga came up the short boy, enveloping his shaking body with a hug and rubbing comforting circles into his body. The entire team waited with baited breath as the paramedics carried out Yamaguchi's almost limp body, Daichi was pulled aside and questioned on the situation, as Suga told Hinata that they had also contacted Ukai on their way here. As well as Yamaguchi's parents, who were all on their way.

Tsukishima was already asking for permission to enter the ambulance with Yamaguchi, almost screaming at the man before someone else came up to him, handing piece of paper Hinata didn't earlier notice. The team watched as Tsukishima opened, glancing across whatever was written before completely breaking down. Karsuno watched as their 6'1 'Stingy'shima broke down into tears, rolling down his face as his body shook with pain.

Asahi was the only one brave enough to walk over and ask for the note, trying his hardest to comfort the boy who rarely showed any emotion. Tsukishima handed the note with shaky hands, before walking into the ambulance with permission from the paramedic who was recently made aware of their relationship. Asahi walked over to the rest of the team, holding the paper in his hand as though it was the most precious thing he'd ever seen.

None of them were certain if they wanted to read it, even with the knowledge it may be the last thing they ever received from the green haired boy. Everyone looked at each other with tears in their eyes before Tanaka reached out, basically declaring himself to read it to everyone, even Daichi who had recently been dismissed.

"...Dear everyone."