"Ready ka na?" tanong ko kay Topaz habang inaayos ang kanyang buhok na nakawala.

"Opo, mommy."

Angela is waiting outside. She offered us a ride kahapon pero nung lumabas kami ni Topaz, nakita ko si Adam na naghihintay habang nakasandal sa kanyang kotse. Ngumiti siya nang makita kami.

"Adam, where's Angela?"

"Nauna na kasama si Mark," he winked at pinantayan ang tangkad ng anak ko. "You must be Topaz. Nice to meet you pretty girl. I'm Adam Cordova."

Nag-angat ng tingin si Topaz sa akin. "Is he my daddy, mommy?"

Nagulat ako sa tanong niya at mabilis na umiling. "No, anak. Tito Adam is my friend. Mamaya pa natin makikilala ang daddy mo."

"Well, your mom and I are supposed to be married now pero mas pinili niya ang daddy mo kesa sa akin," tawa niya as he tousled Topaz's hair.

"Adam, 'wag ka ngang magbiro ng ganyan," nag-iwas ako ng tingin.

Sa harap pa talaga ng anak ko.

"Sorry about that. I just can't help it since eight years din tayong hindi nagkita tapos magiging fake husband mo pa ako," ngisi niya.

Hindi pa rin siya nagbabago. Alaskador pa rin kaso mas gumwapo siya lalo at mas gumanda ang katawan. Hays. Bakit ba ang gagwapo ng mga ex ko, pero sawi ako sa pag-ibig?

"Nice to meet you po, tito Adam," ngiti niya.

Adam opened the door for Topaz.

"Get in, little princess."

"Salamat po."

"Ang galang ng anak mo," komento niya. "Nagmana kay Joseph."

Tinampal ko siya sa braso dahil sa inis.

"Tumahimik ka. Nagmana 'yan ng ganda at ugali sa akin no."

Tumawa siya ng mahina at pinagbuksan ako ng pinto.

"Sinabi mo e. Get in, Ms. Trinidad."

Pinaharurot niya ang sasakyan papunta sa venue. We stayed quiet the whole drive kahit alam ko na naka-earphones ang anak ko sa backseat. Adam decides to break the silence.

"Topaz is so pretty like her mom," diretso pa rin ang tingin sa daan.

"Is that a compliment for me or for Topaz?"

"For Topaz only," he chuckled. "Alam ba ni Joseph na pupunta ka?"

"I don't know. Paano ko naman sasabihin?"

Ni ayaw ko nga siyang kausapin o harapin.

"Well, you do miss him. And I heard from Angela na binisita ka niya sa kumpanya kaso hindi ka nagpakita," he laughed. "Do you still feel guilty? Or scared?"

Bumuntong ako. "Anong klaseng mukha ang ipapakita ko sa kanya gayung ang laki ng kasalanang nagawa ko?"

"He still loves you."

"What if he doesn't anymore?"

Ilang segundo rin ang lumipas bago siya nagsalita ulit.

"Then, we are going to find out soon."

Inihinto niya ang sasakyan sa harap ng function hall. I could hear the upbeat music from inside, at halos lahat ng andito ay mukhang may tama at nakainom na. Amoy na amoy ko ang alak na nanggagaling sa loob.

"Parang hindi Alumni ha. Parang nagbabar lang ang batchmates mo."

"Dang. Maybe, I've made the wrong decision of bringing Topaz here," napatingin ako sa backseat and realized that my daughter was fast asleep.

"She's asleep. You can't bring her in."

"Tch. Ano ba 'yan? Mukhang sign na talaga ito para umuwi ako," napahilamos ako ng mukha.

"Why don't just go inside and enjoy the night? Ako na ang mag-uuwi kay Topaz."

Tinitigan ko siyang mabuti.

"Are you sure, Adam? Baka nakakaabala ang pabor na 'yan sayo."

"Don't worry about it, Ruby. Para naman tayong walang pinagsamahan."

Magsasalita pa sana ako nang tumunog bigla ang cellphone ko. It was Angela calling.

"Huy, nasaan ka na? Kasama mo ba si Adam?"

"Andito na kami sa labas kaso may problema," sinilip ko ulit ang anak ko. "Topaz fell asleep."

"What?" She laughed. "It's a sign na hindi ito ang tamang oras para ipakilala mo siya kay Seph. Hindi yata excited ang anak mo kasi nakatulog."

"M-Maybe," minasahe ko ang aking sentido. "Should I go in?"

"Of course, let's go, Ruby. Sunduin kita sa entrance."

"Sige."

"Enjoy the night, Ms. Mendoza. You still have a long night to spend."

"Thanks, Adam. Hindi ko alam kung bakit ang bait-bait mo pa rin sa akin sa kabila ng lahat ng nangyari noon sa atin."

"I'm still Adam Handsome Cordova. I haven't changed except for the fact na mas gumwapo ako."

"Oo tama. Makapal pa rin ang mukha mo."

Binuksan ko ang pinto at nagpaalam sa kanila. I kissed Topaz's forehead before Adam takes her back to our home.

Naglakad ako papunta sa loob at nakita si Gelai na may hawak na wine. Her cheeks were wine red, halatang may tama na ang isang ito. Ayoko pa naman maghatid ng kaibigang lasing.

"Tama na 'yan. Lasing ka na," I took the glass from her grip.

"I'm not drunk, Ruby. Blush on lang 'yan. Baka sakaling may kumausap sa akin kapag akala nilang lasing ako," tumawa siya at binawi ang glass.

"Nasaan ba si Mark? Ba't 'di mo siya kasama ha?"

"Naghahanda para mamaya," she replied, sipping from her champagne.

"Shall we take a seat?"

"Yeah, sure."

Napunta kami sa table kung nasaan ang group of friends ni Ivy. Andun sila Rachel, Irish, at iba pa. Pati si mayor Eric kasama ang kanyang jowa.

"Rubyyy! Mabuti naman at nakarating ka," Ivy hugged me like she missed me so much. "Wala akong balita sayo simula nung umalis ka papuntang probinsya!"

"S-Sorry. Walang magma-manage sa farm."

I expected Ivy to throw a bitch fit at me but she didn't. She hugged me instead.

"And about what happened eight years ago, alam ko na matagal na 'yong nangyari, but I just want to say sorry in behalf of my mom. She was asking for your forgiveness before she died. I'm hoping you will give the forgiveness she wants," she said calmly.

Janna died?

"I'm sorry for your loss."

"We all have to move on. Someone's death is not a reason for us to stop moving forward. It's the reason why we should keep going," she smiled.

"Hindi ako galit sa mommy mo. Nagpapasalamat ako sa ginawa niya kasi kung hindi dahil dun, malamang ay mahirap pa rin kami. Isang tuka isang kahig pa rin sana kami hanggang ngayon."

Because of the pain her mother gave, natuto akong tumayo sa sarili kong mga paa.

"Thank you, Ruby. I'm really sorry. Wala akong nagawa noon," she cried. Agad kong pinunasan ang kanyang luha.

"Ayos nga lang," ngumiti ako. "Don't cry, Ivy. Masisira ang make up mo. Homecoming pa naman ngayon kaya kailangan maganda tayo."

Naupo kami sa table habang hinihintay namin na magsimula ang event. Nagkwentuhan kami tungkol sa mga nangyari nung college. Binalik pa nila ang alaala ko nung Intramurals kung saan ako hinarana ni Seph kaya ayon, nagtilian sila na parang tanga. Ang ingay ng table namin.

"Sana maulit muli!" sigaw ni Eric.

"Oo nga, e. Kaso hindi na pwede," napangiwi si Irish sa akin. "May anak ka na, diba, Ruby? Sayang talaga kayo ni Joseph."

Natahimik ang lahat sa bilog na mesa. Walang nagsalita. Everyone suddenly felt awkward kaya binasag ko na.

"Naku naman. Kayo ba? Wala ba kayong mga lovelife? Yung lovelife niyo naman pag-usapan natin," pinilit kong ngumiti.

"Oo nga naman. Etong si Eric oh, tiglilima ang jowa. Bigyan mo naman kami!" tampal ni Angela sa balikat niya.

"Tseh, loyal ako sa isa!"

Hindi ako makarelate. Walong taon din akong nawala kaya wala akong balita sa mga kaklase ko. I excused myself for a while and decided to go upstairs upang magpahangin sa terrace. Maganda ang view mula doon dahil kitang-kita ang bilog at puting buwan kasama ng mga bituin. Tahimik dito at wala masyadong tao dahil nasa ibaba silang lahat.

I wonder what he's currently doing tonight?

"Ang ganda talaga ng buwan sa kahit na anong anggulo," bulong ko habang nakatingala sa langit.

"And so are you."

My heart went wild as I heard his deep voice. I don't want to turn around, but my body betrayed me dahil napalingon ako sa aking likuran.

"J-Joseph..." para akong nakakita ng multo.

He's wearing a formal suit. His hair was neatly combed as his silver earrings reflected the lights. Lumapit siya sa akin ng dahan-dahan. His eyes were so intense that it's making it harder to breathe.

"Paano mo nalaman na andito ako?"

"I always keep my eyes on you, Ruby. Alam mo 'yan noon pa."

This feeling again. This goddamn feelings... again!

"Then, we are going to find out soon."

I already did. And I am still in love with him. I still love him! Gusto kong umalis, but my body won't let me do what I want. It stays with him.

"Why did you leave me? What have I done for you to leave me years ago? Ni-hindi ka man lang nagpaliwanag ng maayos sa akin. Do you know what I have been through just to get over you? Tapos babalik ka rito at malalaman ko nalang na may anak ka na? Para ano? Are you planning to hurt me again?!"

Nahilo ako sa sunod-sunod niyang tanong. How could I answer it? Hindi ako nakapaghanda ng explanations.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have come here in the first place."

Aalis na sana ako when he pulled me back, gripping my wrist tightly.

"Explain everything to me. Bakit mo ako iniwan?"

Tinitigan niya akong mabuti. Tears start falling from my tearducts dahilan para lumabo ang paningin ko.

"I had to leave. I had to stay away from your family dahil nalaman ko mula sa mommy mo ang katotohanan tungkol sa pamilya ko," I cried. "M-My father killed your dad. Tinanggalan kita ng karapatang magkaroon ng buong pamilya, Joseph. I'm really sorry."

My chest tightened, pain consumed my heart. Hirap na hirap akong umiyak like my lungs limit the oxygen intake in my body.

"Kaya ka ba umalis kasi nalaman mo 'yon at natakot ka na baka kamuhian kita? Do you think I am stupid to not know that?" He combed his hair in anger using his fingtertips. "Sa tingin mo ba talaga hindi ko alam na ang tatay mo ang pumatay sa ama ko, Ruby?"

Nag-angat ako ng tingin. "What d-do you mean?"

"The reason why I know you is because of what your father did. Nasa iisang probinsya lang tayo noon. My father was involved in politics kaya marami kaming kakilala na may kapangyarihan. Nalaman kaagad ni mommy ang tungkol sa pamilya mo lalong-lalo na sa tatay mo. While mom was investigating your family, I got involved. Nalaman ko na may anak ang pumatay kay daddy. Ikaw at si Jade. I hated you ever since, I despised you ever since. I was jealous because you're so naive, you haven't realized that your father killed someone, ruining another family. Sa araw-araw na ginawa ng Diyos, Ruby, kinamuhian kita sa bawat araw na 'yon."

Lumapit siya sa akin. He stared at me like he was begging for something.

"But the more I hated you, the more I realized that I didn't want you to hate me. I was jealous. You're so independent, cheerful and lucky to have a family that cares for you. Despite being poor you always put a smile on your face, and that's why I fell in love with you. I am always in love with you. I thought I hate you, but I love you. I didn't want to see you cry. I didn't want to see you sad. I didn't want you to be with other guys. I easily get jealous. I want you to be with me, Ruby because you're too precious to me and I want to keep you like a ruby," he then cupped my hands kissing it.

I was left speechless. Bumubuka ang bibig ko pero walang salita ang lumalabas mula rito.

"I know that you're the daughter of my father's killer, but how can I stop myself from falling in love with you? I just can't."

Sunod-sunod na bumagsak ang luha ko. "I'm sorry. I was too afraid that you'd hate me. I'm sorry if I didn't do anything to reach out to you. And I'm sorry for keeping your daughter away from you."

Nanigas siya sa huli kong sinabi.

"Daughter? W-Who?"

"Si Topaz. She is your daughter, Seph."

He wasn't saying anything. His lips parted but did not say anything.

"Magsalita ka naman. Kinakabahan ako sayo."

"Is that true? Tell me you're not lying."

"I'm not. She is your daughter. And I was planning that the two of you should meet tonight, pero nakatulog siya sa kotse kaya pinauwi ko muna."

"Damn," ginulo niya ang kanyang buhok. "I can't believe it. I have a daughter. I'm a fucking dad!"

He lift me in the air at inikot ako na parang tanga.

"Ibaba mo nga ako. Nakakahiya ka."

"Wait, but doesn't she has a daddy already? Sabi niya nasa hospital ang dad nya."

"She was referring to her daddy-lolo, my stepdad," I replied at naalala si Gibson. "That kid sa playground. Is he your son? He called you dad."

"No, he will never be my fucking son. Anak 'yon ni Gabriel and he keeps calling us daddy's. Trip niya 'yon para asarin si Topaz na marami siyang daddy," ngisi niya.

He was still carrying me, and he was freaking grinning. Mukhang may masamang balak ang isang ito.

"What?" my brows arched.

"You're so beautiful tonight."

"Alam ko kaya ibaba mo na ako please."

He did what I told him. We were just standing there, staring at each other's eyes. Napalunok ako when he collides our lips together. Marahan, unti-unti, his kisses were deep and passionate. Ang tagal ko ring hindi natikman ang labi ni Seph. I have been longing for him all these years and now I finally got I want.

I want to be with him.

"Can you breathe?" he asked when he pulled away.

"Konti."

"Sorry, I was just... dry and thirsty."

My cheeks burned in embarassment.

"God, Joseph Rivera, hindi ka pa rin talaga nagbabago!"

"Why? Don't tell me hindi mo ako namiss?" Ngisi niya.

"N-Namiss pero kahit na!"

Hinila niya ako palapit sa kanya, wrapping his arms around my waist.

"I hate to see you wearing sexy outfits. Kitang-kita pa ang cleavage mo."

"Since college tayo ganito na talaga kalaki ang dibdib ko. Wala kang magagawa."

"Tch," he averted his gaze. "Do you have plans on marrying?"

Nagulat ako sa kanyang tanong. I replied as soon as I gained an amount of oxygen in my brain.

"If it's you that I'd marry, then I guess I do have plans."

"Then let's get married, Precious," he grinned, pressing his lips to mine again. "I love you."

"I fucking love you too."

"Aah, eherm."

Napalingon kami sa nagsalita. Si Gabriel pala, may dala pang champagne.

"Sorry to interrupt whatever this is pero magsisimula na tayo, dude."

"Oh, shit. I almost forgot about that. Let's continue this later, Precious. Bumalik na tayo sa baba, shall we?" hinila niya ako kasama niya.

If it's Joseph that I'll marry, then I wouldn't mind marrying him over and over again.

———