IT'S BEEN weeks since we started dating officially.

Maraming linta sa school na mabilis sumipsip ng balita. He meant what he said, nag-apply nga s'ya kasama ko sa coffee shop as a waiter. He did everything for me when we became official like it was my first time having one.

"Tulaley ka na naman d'yan?" tampal ni June sa balikat ko.

Napansin n'ya ata na tulala akong nakatingin kay Joseph. "W-Wala naman."

"Yiiieee, ang swerte mo, beh. Gwapong-gwapo ka sa boyfriend mo no?"

I nod and smile, returning my attention to the guy who was trying to serve coffee to the customers. How lucky can I get?

Malapit ko na ring mabayaran ang accounts ko kay Landlord. I will definitely pay for the whole two months. If it's not enough, then I'll work twice or thrice my shift or even the 24/7 work hours just to earn the money I need.

"Ako na rito, Ruby," Vivian emerged from the door of the staff room, yawning.

Napatingin ako sa bilog na orasan na nakadikit sa pader namin. It was already my break time. Mabilis akong pumasok sa loob at naupo kaagad. Hinilod ko ng marahan ang aking mga paa dahil sa heels na suot ko. We're not allowed to wear flat shoes, so you have to wear at least two-inched heels. Maiksi rin masyado ang skirt namin. When Seph found out about how short my skirt was, he decided to buy me stockings. Masyado s'yang strikto pagdating sa legs ko na madalas pagtinginan ng customers.

"Let me do it for you."

Agad akong napatingin sa lalaking kakapasok lang sa pinto. He was looking at my red sole, concerned and worried.

"'Wag na. Magpahinga ka rin kahit papaano," he didn't listen, he knelt down, massaging my feet gently. "You should put band aid next time, Precious."

Namula ako sa hiya dahil sa mabilis na kabog ng dibdib ko. His hands were freaking smooth sending electric currents to my spine. Mas lalo s'ya naging maalaga nung naging kami na.

"You should rest too, Seph. You don't have to do this to me all the time."

"Why not? You're my girlfriend. I should do this to you all the time."

Napangiti ako ng konti. "Ang tigas talaga ng ulo mo no?"

"Mas matigas iyang sa'yo," he let out a lopsided smile.

He stood up when he finished massaging my feet. It felt really good. Papasa na s'ya sa pagiging masahista.

"Thank you," sabi ko at mabilis na isinuot ang aking heels.

"How much did you earn this week?" he asked, watching me wear my heels.

"3,700 pesos I think."

"Not enough."

Bumuntong ako at tumayo upang harapin s'ya. "It's fine, Seph. I just need to work twice or thrice my shift to earn more than enough."

Kulang pa ng tatlong libo ang ipon ko para bayaran ang two months, which includes the electricity and water bills. Nawawalan na ako ng pag-asa, but I'd rather work and be disappointed than be disappointed without working for it.

"You know that I could always pay your bills and your rent, Ruby-"

"Don't," I blurted. "Just... don't."

Ayokong magkautang loob sa kahit na sinong lalaki sa mundo. Ayoko, ayoko lang. I hated the idea of me needing help from my friends, especially to my boyfriend. I still don't know his parents, hindi n'ya pa ako napapakilala, but I have a bad feeling about it. They're rich after all and history keeps repeating itself. Baka mangyari lang ang nangyari sa akin noon. Baka mangyari lang ang kinatatakutan ko ngayon.

"I know you don't want me to," he sighed and washed his face using his hand. "But you still have me okay? Just ask whatever you need and I will give it to you. You know that."

"I know," I smiled and kissed his cheeks.

"Hindi talaga ikaw yung tipo ng tao na hindi nagsasabi kung kailangan n'ya ng tulong o hindi."

I face him before leaving the personnel's area. "Yes, I am that kind of girl and yes, I am your girlfriend."

Inayos ko ang aking gamit sa loob ng maliit kong shoulder bag. Seph didn't bring any stuff, he always says na andito naman ako, that he needs nothing more except me. Pereng tenge!

"Are you done?" tanong n'ya habang hinihintay akong matapos sa pag-aayos.

"Teka lang, have you seen my phone?" kinakapa-kapa ko ang aking bulsa at tinignan ang loob ng aking bag. "Kinuha mo ba?"

"Hiniram ko muna kanina. Naglaro ako ng ML," he was waving it.

"Loko ka talaga," mabilis ko iyong hinablot. "Hindi ka man lang nagpaalam."

"Akala ko ba what's yours is mine?" arte n'ya at nagpout pa. Ang cute talaga promise!

Nag-iwas ako ng tingin para 'di n'ya makita ang namumula kong pisngi. "Who told you? I never said that. Besides, ikaw lang ang nagsabi n'yan sa akin."

"Sorry na," he uttered and kissed my forehead. "Let's go home and eat something nice."

"Oo na."

Nagpaalam kami sa mga kasamahan namin. Eto namang si June kinikilig ng sobra habang tinitignan ang magkahawak naming kamay palabas.

"Goodbye lovebirds. Humayo kayo sa lupang sinilingan n'yo," sambit ni Carlo na nakangisi.

"Shut up," Seph laughed and pulled me outside.

Dumaan ulit kami sa Mang Inasal upang bumili ng dinner. Bibilhan n'ya rin si Ivy. Sinalubong kami ng malakas na hangin mula sa fan ng aircon. Dumiretso kami sa loob para umorder.

"Same order lang ba tayo?" tanong niya habang nakatingin sa menu.

"Uhm, oo," sagot ko.

Naghanap ako ng mauupuan kasi mukhang matatagalan pa s'ya bago tuluyang makaorder dahil sa mahabang pila.

"I'll just sit over there."

"Wait patiently for me, Precious."

"Hindi ako gaya mo na inipin."

His perfect brows bridged in the middle. "I've waited for you for years. Pakunswelo mo na rin ang hintayin ako for ten minutes or so."

"Oo na nga."

Agad akong umupo habang pinagmamasdan s'yang nakapila. I noticed how the girls were staring at him, making gestures and glancing at me for a couple of times. Napangiti ako dahil dun. I feel lucky knowing the idea that I am the only girl he sees in this room. Kahit maraming babae ang napapasulyap sa kanya, ako pa rin ang sinusulyapan n'ya.

And yes, he patiently waited for me for years. Nakwento n'ya iyon sa akin after we ate together last week. He said that I was the only girl who caught his attention on last year's Intramurals. Kumakanta sila noon sa harapan ng stage ngunit hindi ako nakatingin sa kanya noon, unlike other girls who were shouting and calling his name like a heartthrob.

"In a crowd of people, you're the only girl I saw. You're the only girl who made me want to know you."

I remember him saying those words to me. Ang lakas n'ya talagang makabanat, super lakas ng epekto sa akin kagaya ng epekto ko sa kanya.

Isang taon na n'ya akong kilala, but I only know him for months. Kung alam ko lang na may ganito kagwapong lalaki na nagkakagusto sa akin noon, I wouldn't bother thinking about how Adam left me. Kahit two years na ang nagdaan, masakit pa rin, may kirot pa rin. I can't damn help it.

Napatingin ulit ako sa kanya. He was talking to the cashier, it was his turn to order. Dinukdok ko ang aking mukha sa table when I saw a super familiar face with a super familiar friend. I tried squinting my eyes to make sure who I saw. Fudge, this is the typical disadvantage for nearsighted people like me. Ang hirap makakita sa malayo. Nakita kong humarap iyong babae sa lalaking kasama n'ya. Mas lalo lang lumaki ang nanlaki kong mga mata when I saw Ivy and Adam together. But they didn't seem to be having fun at all, they're acting perfectly casual like strangers who'd just met yesterday.

"What the hell?" I blurted and stood up, approaching to where they were standing.

I need to confirm nga sila nga iyan. I don't feel betrayed, I just feel so tanga right now. Nagtago ako sa likod ng pader para hindi nila ako makita. They were talking, well, their lips were moving fast. I conclude na nag-uusap nga silang dalawa. But goddamn it, I can't hear what they're saying. Puro murmur lang na parang isang bubuyog ang naririnig ko mula rito.

I need to get close.

I hate the idea of stalking my ex together with my friend, but mas hate ko ang idea na hindi matatahimik ang kaluluwa ko kapag hindi ako nakakuha ng sagot. I was fucking curious kaya lumapit ako ng konti at nagpanggap na may tinitignan sa mga damit. Mabuti na lang at may maliit na ukay-ukayan dito.

"You need to stop this, Ivy. I don't think you're cut out for this."

"Desisyon ko ito. No need to tell me what I should do."

"If this is for the sake of your brother's happiness, then I'm good with it. I still love her, but I'm happy for her," he glumly said.

I felt my chest tightened like it got squeezed unintentionally inside. Bakit ba ako nasasaktan sa mga sinasabi ni Adam? Baka nga puro kasinungalingan lang ang lumalabas sa bibig n'ya.

"Just love someone else, Adam. Ruby doesn't deserve you."

Ouchie!

Ivy's talking behind my back and it emotionally hurts. Totoo nga pala ang sabi ni Khane sa akin. Words hurt like a knife or more than that. And curiosity kills the cat.

Napagdesisyunan kong umalis doon. Baka may marinig pa akong hindi maganda tungkol sa akin na galing mismo sa bibig ni Ivy. I couldn't afford to listen to Ivy's offensive words behind my back. Mabait s'ya sa akin, wala s'yang ibang ginawa kundi ang maging mabait sa akin simula nang maging roommate kami.

I felt tears falling on my cheeks as I went back to the store. Nakita kong nakaupo si Joseph sa mesa kung saan ako nakaupo kanina. He smiled when he saw me. I walked to him, hugging him as tight as I could.

"Did something happen? Where have you been?"

Umiling ako at nanatiling nakayakap sa kanya. I don't care if people were staring at us. I was urging to hug him after what I saw with my two eyes and heard with my two ears.

"Wala naman."

"I could feel my shirt's getting wet," he said. "Tell me what happened. You're crying."

Kumawala ako at mabilis na pinunasan ang aking mga luha. "Tara na. Gutom na ako."

He looked at me, more like observing me. Hinugot n'ya ang kanyang panyo mula sa kanyang bulsa kahit may dala-dala s'yang brown paperbag.

"Tell me everything when we get back," he said, wiping my tears using his handkerchief. "I hate seeing you like this kahit hindi ako ang rason so stop crying."

Tumango ako at ngumiti. "I'm fine."

"You don't look fine to me."

"Gutom lang ako."

"Then we'd better get going."

I need to sleep, Seph. I need to confirm if I still have feelings for my ex because it still hurts whenever I see him around with another girl.

——