7. Hopeless emptiness
1.5 Months Later—(Yes, there is a time skip, and there will be a few in this chapter, but don't worry—you are not missing anything. It will come together, eventually.)
I have also decided to split this chapter into two. The next chapter will be posted within the next day.
This chapter is a little sad, so I'm giving you a pre-hug.
*****
"Seokjin-"
With a strained expression, Jin kept his gaze fixed on the staff members diligently packing his belongings as he addressed his mother with a firm tone, "Mom, I said I'm fine. I don't want to stay here." His words echoed through the room as he spoke them.
Joo-young, Seokjin's mother, released a heavy, defeated sigh that seemed to carry the weight of her emotions. Her words saturated sadness and concern as she addressed Seokjin. "Seokjin, can you think about how this is going to affect me? Do you know how horrible your father and I already feel for not being there to protect you when you needed it the most-"
Jin's voice rose as he interrupted his mother, his frustration evident. "Mom, feeling horrible won't change what happened to me. Can you stop? What do you want me to do? Give up my life and live like I don't exist? I am returning to school because that's what I want to do. Dad is also fine with my decision."
Joo-young felt even more defeated than when she had entered the room to talk to her son. She didn't expect him to stop living his life, but she was painfully aware of the trauma he had endured. Despite dealing with the man and others who had threatened her son, she wasn't comfortable with his decision to leave the U.S. and return to South Korea. This decision was especially difficult for her, as she wasn't able to be there in South Korea for him most of the time as she would have wanted.
She became upset after learning that her husband was also okay with her son's decision. Without saying another word to Seokjin, she left his room and took the elevator to the third floor, where her husband's main home office was.
She wasn't surprised to see him engrossed in a phone call as she walked into his office. However, the instant their eyes met, he swiftly wrapped up the conversation, giving her his undivided attention.
"Is this about Seokjin?" Byung-chul, Jin's father, asked knowingly.
Joo-young's voice was filled with disbelief and outrage as she confronted her husband. "How can you possibly be fine with him going back there? Are you out of your mind? Our son just went through one of the most traumatic experiences imaginable, and you're actually going to be okay with him returning to that place?"
Byung-chul rose from his seat, his steps slow and deliberate, as he approached his wife, who was visibly outraged. He understood her anger completely, but he also knew that there was little he could do to change his son's decision. "Seokjin said it's what he wanted. Of course, I am not okay with it, but what exactly could I have told him? No? You wanted me to tell him, no? When has it ever been the norm to tell our son no, Joo-young? Do you want me to do that?"
Tears welled up in Joo-young's eyes, her internal struggle evident as she uttered, "No, that's not what I'm asking you to do. I just... this is... it hasn't been long since this happened. Why does he want to go back? There are schools here?"
"I understand and share your feelings, but Seokjin doesn't feel the same way, and we can't force him to think or feel as we do. He has already suffered a loss of freedom in a way he shouldn't have, and I don't want us to add to it. Our actions shouldn't further burden him.
Since he expressed a desire to return, I took the initiative to purchase a building for him. Jimin and Hoseok will be relocating to this building. I made the decision not to disclose the details of Seokjin's ordeal to their parents. They saw the practicality of the arrangement, as each of them will have their own floor and privacy whenever necessary," Byung-Chul explained, hoping to convey the thoughtfulness behind his decisions to his wife.
"I have taken elaborate measures to ensure the safety and security of the premises. In addition to installing a state-of-the-art 24-hour security system, I have hired highly trained military security personnel. The property is equipped with advanced sensors and a facial recognition system.
Nonresidents seeking access will receive a unique, one-time-generated code, which will be deactivated upon use. If the code remains unused within a specified timeframe, it will be automatically deactivated. The onsite security team will scan and collect the identification of every individual entering the property.
Furthermore, all mail deliveries will be directed to the designated outside mailroom, which will undergo thorough scanning before being forwarded to the in-house mailroom. The dedicated in-housekeepers will then deliver the mail directly to them as needed. Access to the elevators leading to their units will be strictly regulated, requiring either the use of the security app, a temporary generated code, or master codes," explained Byung-Chul as he tried to reassure his wife, which he knew was hard.
"In addition to these security measures, I am collaborating with local law enforcement to implement further safety protocols and have requested additional resources to ensure their utmost safety."
Even though she was still not okay with her son's decision, Joo-young could see the effort her husband had already put in with their son's safety and well-being in mind.
"I also plan for us to be there every other month or as needed. However, it is important to me that he does not perceive his existence in this world as restricted or live in constant fear. He was a victim, taken advantage of, and he should not have to tiptoe around or feel like he is in a world where he does not belong. Our son has been unfairly treated, and I am committed to ensuring that he can continue living his life on his terms without carrying the weight of what happened to him or feeling responsible for something he had no control over."
"I know you are right, but as his mom, I feel like we could've done more to protect him, and we didn't."
"Joo-young, it's impossible to predict someone's actions. We also know that we can't prevent everything from happening, no matter how much we'd like to. Every year, millions of children go off to school, and not all of them experience what our son has. We never anticipated that something like this would happen, especially considering the security guard had passed every background check and the building had a high safety rating. I don't want our son to blame himself, and I don't want you to do it either because dwelling on the 'what ifs' will not change what happened."
******
A couple of weeks later
******
Taehyung clutched the tablet tightly in his hand, grappling with the same thought over and over for the past ten minutes. He wasn't sure if it was the right idea, but he felt like he had been left with no other choice. Everything he had done within the past two months had not given him any of the answers he had been seeking.
Despite never having the best life, he always tried to live with what he had. He was humble in the best way, never seeking more than what he was given or taking from others. However, he couldn't understand why life had become so unkind to him even after living that way.
Recently, life had become increasingly difficult to bear, prompting him to throw himself into work and studies without a break. Constantly striving to keep himself occupied, he sought to fend off the overwhelming thoughts that threatened to consume him.
In only two months, he experienced the heartbreaking loss of two cherished individuals. His mother succumbed to her long-standing health challenges, while Seokjin vanished from his life without a trace. His world seemed to crumble, leaving him in a state of enduring anguish. He was blurred into the next each day, with no distinction between morning and evening. He was merely drifting through life, devoid of true engagement or purpose.
His sole sources of motivation were the unfulfilled wishes of his mother, the promises he had made to her, the constant thought of his father, and an insatiable need to uncover the whereabouts of Seokjin, who had disappeared from his life.
It was the exact reason why he found himself walking closer to the table where Jimin and Hoseok had just taken their seats. It was his first time seeing them since he had returned from his hometown, and he had been hoping to see them along with Seokjin. However, he couldn't help but feel a pang of disappointment upon realizing that Seokjin was not among them.
His heart raced as he approached their table, his breaths deep and shaky. He was anxious about how to approach them with the questions about Seokjin in mind. He also knew he was going against what Seokjin would have been okay with, but the torture of not knowing Seokjin's whereabouts only added to his already broken state.
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