
Chapter 19
The car is a bit livelier leaving the party than it was when we arrived. There is still a low hum of music, but it's hard to give it a lot of attention with the chatter from the guys. I sink back into the seat, closing my eyes to take a moment to myself. At the party, I didn't allow myself to feel embarrassed about the fact I had a panic attack at just being there. The guys did a good job of distracting me, and I didn't want to break down once again. Now out of the situation, I feel a lot calmer in certain areas, but a lot worse in others.
A warm hand reached over and squeezes mine. I don't know whether to be relieved that I'm not going through this alone or to be embarrassed that I have to rely on them yet again. I don't want to bring the atmosphere down again, for them and me, so I take a second longer to breathe, and open my eyes. Ashton has his eyes on the road, but when I move position, his eyes flick to me, squeezing my hand once again. I share a smile with him.
He needs his hand back to take a turn, and mine turns cold at the loss. After the turn, he rests his hand between our two seats, and for a moment we just stay like that, both listening to the guys behind us. Ashton joins in, and the guys address me every so often but I'm content just listening. They start to talk about the party and it reminds me that Ashton was the one to be there for me once again. I don't think, and rest my hand on his first aiming to only get his attention.
"Thank you," I tell him. "For helping me when..." I can't quite find the right words. Ashton understands all the same.
"Anytime." Now would be the time that I take my hand back, however, I admit to myself that it does give me some comfort to know he's right there. Ashton doesn't seem to mind and continues to drive with just one hand.
It's not long until we pull onto Ashton's street, the other cars following behind us, creating the appearance of a motorcade.
I hadn't given much thought to how we could all fit into Ashton's small house until now, but Ashton didn't seem too concerned. Ryder and Trystan deserve a better way than this to celebrate their birthday. I didn't ask Ryder how it went with his father, but judging by his expression it wasn't too favourable.
My concerns don't seem to be founded though, because as soon as I meet them when we're all out of the car, they look the happiest I've seen them all day. We make our way through the gate at the front, and I stay there, holding it open for Levi and the rest of the guys. Levi's getting good with the wheelchair, and he luckily gets through without much problem.
Brody is the last through, and he slings an arm around my neck, resting his head on mine.
"Can I expect to see some cute pyjamas for this party?" he asks me, his voice cheery.
"Dude," Jesse calls back. Brody laughs.
"I was joking," he says loud enough for them all to hear. "Whatever you wear is cute," he says quietening, leaning further into me. I'm thankful for the dark hiding the blush that spreads over my face.
The chatter from all of the guys decreases incredibly when we make our way through the door, and they all move around the house silently. It's obvious that it's not their first time here with the way they're moving with ease through the space. I've been staying here long enough to only just know my way around in the dark.
Ashton puts a few lamps on around the room, and some of the guys sit in chairs while the others take the floor. Brody pulls me with him to a space on the couch, and he takes his arm back. I motion to him to take the couch, and he does the same.
"Milady."
"My Lord," I counter, and he grins at me.
"Someone just sit," Storm grumbles from where he's sat on the floor next to a kids table. It looks even smaller in comparison to him, his long legs stretched out in front of him as he rests his head on the arm of the chair Ryder is sitting in. Ryder is in a similar pose. I look around the room and see that they're all exhausted. The same goes for me, and I try and work out why. The pressure of being constantly under scrutiny is probably why I'm feeling like this, and I wonder if the same goes for the others. We didn't get a break from their parents the whole time. I would much rather Brody have the comfortable seat. I can sit on the floor that's not a problem.
To avoid any more arguments, I get down on the floor in front of the space, crossing my legs. Brody sighs, and clambers over me, falling into the space between Trystan and Levi. I sit with a straight back, wanting to give space to the guys behind me, but Brody places a leg on each of my shoulders, and I don't have to look at him to know he's grinning. His legs quickly fall off my shoulders after either Levi or Trystan slaps him on the thigh. Staying on either side of me, it gives me space to lean back against the seat. I glance over my shoulder at Brody, and he gives me a small smile before he gives his attention to Trystan next to him.
"Well... Happy Birthday." I can't help a snort erupting out of me, both at the way he said it, and the situation we're in currently. I'm not the only one, and soon we're all trying to control our laughter so as not to wake anyone. I'm happy to see Trystan and Ryder are finding the humour in it too.
The laughter subsides, and when it returns to normal, it feels like it truly has. The party didn't happen, and we're just hanging out.
Something makes its way around the room, and when Levi holds it down in front of my face I remember the gift that I had no hand in picking but the guys said to give to them myself. We'd given this to a staff member. How did they get it?
Thinking it's strange to hold onto it, I straighten my legs and push up to my feet. I stand there for a moment, wondering which of them to give it to. I open the gift bag and peer inside to see two neatly wrapped presents, one with a gift tag in the shape of an 'R' and the other with a 'T'. Relief washes over me, and I take each out, giving them to the respective person. They both smile at me, and it's only when I sit back down that I realise I know them so well that I don't even question who is who anymore. I don't have to look for the scar on Trystan's forehead or remember Ryder has a deeper voice, I just know. It's in the small things, like the way they sit, talk, or just exist. Even Sophie can tell.
I turn my body so I can face each of them and watch them open the presents, and then once again something else hits me, this one less positive. A card. We didn't get them a card. Ryder and Trystan don't seem upset at that, but I gnaw my lip all the same. I may as well have forgotten their birthdays.
I pull a knee up to my chest, hugging it close. Brody senses my feelings and pats me lightly on the head. It's a sign that it's ok.
I take a deep breath and watch them rip the paper. Ryder is the first to get the paper off and I see a photo frame emerge. Not trying to look too eager to see, I wait for Trystan to get his paper off and see he too has a photo frame.
"It was a pretty shitty day, but it was probably one of the best as well," Levi says to them. "He tried to split us up, but we will always have each other, and this is a constant reminder of that. And what can you give two people who already have everything?"
"Friendship and memories," Ryder says with a smile. Trystan laughs.
"I can't believe you remember."
"Of course we do," Brody says, slapping the back of his head. "What kind of friends do you think we are?" I'm lost, but I'm just happy to see them happy with each other.
"It was something Gerard said when we were younger." Colton supplies. I smile even wider. These guys really do care about each other in a way that no one else will probably understand. They've been friends for so long that they know each other inside out. And now I'm in the middle of it.
"Thanks, Bambi," Trystan says first, and I get up intending on clearing the rubbish away, but Trystan pulls me into a hug before I can. Instead, Ashton does it. I hug him back.
"Happy Birthday," I mumble into his shoulder. He pulls back, and I glance down at the photo in the frame.
"Can I?" I ask, and he passes it to me to have a look. Under the photo is inscribed 'Friendship and Memories', which only makes me emotional when I see the photo. It's of the beach day. Before Tanner tried to abduct me, before he shot Levi, and before Terry. It's a candid shot of us all eating our ice creams. I look happy, like actually happy, and not just the happiness that I pretend to have sometimes. All of the guys are in the photos, along with Sophie and her big ice cream. It's hard to imagine that everything will get darker later that day.
"Where'd you get the photos?" Ryder asks coming up behind me placing his next to the one I'm holding, so he can see them both. I turn to that one and see me on Ryder's shoulder in the game of Frisbee. I'm relieved to see that his back is to the camera, allowing my face to be the thing being photographed. We're all laughing, Sophie on Storm's shoulders. Again, I look genuinely happy and carefree.
"Sam," Jesse says. I'll have to ask him to see the others he took. I wouldn't mind some of the photos. It reminds me that things were better. Ryder squeezes me close to his side in his own hug.
"Today's probably been the best birthday we've ever had, so thank you."
Hi Guys! Sorry for the wait. I had been trying to write for another book that I ultimately decided was a lost cause, so I thought it would be best to stop writing it for now and focus on just the two books. That obviously means the updates for this book will be every other week now.
I hope you enjoyed this update! I can't remember if I have mentioned but I'm working, behind the scenes, to have another look at the first book - I'm very slowly in my own time seeing if I need to rewrite it. Eventually, if it's finished, I'll post the revised version as well as keeping up the original. Would you be interested in that? I say eventually because I doubt it will be any time soon. It's just something that's happening alongside me writing this book, and future books.
I mention this because something that hasn't really been mentioned before is the fact that Bambi is able to tell the difference between Trystan and Ryder. This would be something that I would add to the revised version. DON'T WORRY!! The plot and the characters we love and love to hate would stay the same. There would be the same and extra things in the story. Is there something that you would be interested in seeing in the revised version? No promises that it would be in it!
What did you think?
What do you want to happen next/in future parts?
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CC ;)
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