The bruises still hadn't faded. There were no visible cuts, and the bone that Bellatrix had almost broken was completely healed due to Narcissa's healing spells. But the bruises were a cruel reminder of the pain Lyra had gone through. 

She had hoped that after she had gone to sleep the previous night, it would all be forgotten. That she would wake up and not feel the pain anymore. But it wouldn't go away. It still felt like being stabbed by a thousand needles. If not her body, then her mind. It was a constant headache. 

She tugged at her sleeve as she sat in an empty compartment on the Hogwarts Express. Some people had tried to go in, probably because most compartments were full. She only scared them away with a threatening look. 

There were no bruises to ruin her pretty face, but they covered her arms, her legs and her stomach. They didn't hurt to touch, but they were perfectly visible and noticeable if one knew where to look. 

The sleeve of her robe wouldn't go far enough down to cover the purple marks on her left wrist. She chuckled bitterly to herself, although her throat still hurt from the screaming and crying. Tugging at her sleeve, the way she had seen Regulus do so many times. To cover his Dark Mark.

She sighed and leaned her head against the window, ignoring the thumping of the moving train. In a way, the discomfort of it reminded her that she was still alive. She had undergone the torture curse, the most horrible of the Unforgivables in her opinion, and she was still alive. At least, for now. 

She was sure she was supposed to be in the prefects compartment to discuss the upcoming term with the Head Boy and Head Girl. But she couldn't go and look him in the eye, knowing that she was putting him in danger.

Lyra was allowed some clarity of mind while sitting alone, though. She had the chance to think about things, to contemplate what the hell she was going to do now. Because, truthfully, she was lost. 

Lyra Black loved James Potter more than words could ever dream to express. Every part of him had become her favorite things in the world, things she selfishly didn't ever want to live without. 

But she didn't want to deprive the world of him either. Because the world needed more people like James. A bright light in the darkness, cheering up those who are down, all out of the goodness of their hearts. 

Then again, leaving him didn't only mean leaving him. Remus, Sirius and Peter were all such important pieces of her life, all whom she loved (though two more than the last for obvious reasons). They'd live without her, she knew that. But she didn't know if she could live without them anymore. 

Because without them, she knew exactly what her life would hold. There was no use in being optimistic and hoping that if she worked hard, got good marks and got some position at the Ministry she'd be safe. She'd never be safe. Heartache seemed to follow her where she went.

She had two options, neither of which was perfect.

She could try to run away and choose James, to die with him in six months when they'd be hunted down by the Black family and the Death Eaters, all of whom would have a personal vendetta against them. 

Or she could protect him, make sure he lived and lose her heart for it. She just knew she'd be forced into a marriage with some sort of pureblood supremacist, which wasn't even the worst part. The worst part was that she might have the Dark Mark on her arm within the year. 

"Lyra?" a voice asked from the compartment door. She was prepared to yell, to tell whoever it was to leave her alone. But then she saw Regulus, dressed in his robes with a concerned frown on his face. "Are you alright?"

She only sighed, tired. She knew there was no way to convince anybody that she was alright anymore. Her face, which had once radiated happiness, had faded into a blank canvas of nothingness. "I'm fine."

Regulus could see that she was clearly not fine. He had also noticed that she hadn't been at the prefect meeting, something her boyfriend had seemed particularily concerned about, whispering to Remus Lupin about it. "Did you tell them? About Potter?"

"I told Bella and Cissy. It went about as well as you'd think," the blonde muttered bitterly. Flashes of blood and the sound of her own horrible screams appeared in front of her and she had to steady her breathing as she felt like hyperventilating. 

The sixth-year noticed how she had started nervously tugging at her sleeve, like he often did. But he could also see what she was trying to hide. Purple and blue bruises, quite easily visible over her pale skin. "What are you going to do?"

She shrugged helplessly. "I have no idea. I have two choices. I can leave James so he's safe and spend my life drowning in unhappiness. Or I could stay with him and risk dying with him the moment we leave school. That's what Bella threatened to make happen, at least. We all know not to underestimate her wrath."

"I don't want you to be unhappy, Lyra. It may not seem like it, because how I've been acting lately," said Regulus, sincerely. "I'm just so scared of what my life holds. Rabastan's getting too deep into the cause, I know it. I've barely heard from him since he disappeared."

"I haven't heard a thing," Lyra responded, thinking about her old friend. If he would have been at school, she was sure that things would have gone even worse during the last few months. "Perhaps that's for the better. I don't want to know how he'd feel about all this."

"Will it help you choose if I beg you to stay?" the dark-haired boy pleaded, with a desperation behind him that Lyra hadn't ever seen before. He had always tried to seem so strong and independent. Maybe she should have seen it before. "Because I need you."

"Oh, Regulus." She sighed deeply as she saw tears build up in his eyes. She hadn't ever seen Regulus cry before, and the sight was enough to make her weep herself. She stood up from her seat and quickly wrapped her arms around him, pulling him close as they cried together. 

▹▹▹

Regulus had given Lyra the password to the Slytherin Common Room. She ignored all the stares of her roommates as she unpacked her things. She couldn't deal with them now. She didn't want to deal with anything at all. 

She slept through dinner, not feeling very hungry. She was scared that if she tried to take a bite of her food that she would only want to throw it up again. She had barely eaten since the night before. 

It wasn't until the next day, before breakfast, that Lyra found herself surrounded by people again. She immediately wanted to run away the second she saw Sirius, Remus and Peter at the Gryffindor table, chatting nonchalantly. 

But then she saw him. James was standing in a corner, obviously having been waiting for her to appear. They were boyfriend and girlfriend, after all, and they hadn't gotten to see each other in weeks. 

Once he caught sight of her, he quickly brightened up. He beamed at her, grinning widely. She could barely fake a small smile in return, her heart breaking as she imagined his face battered and bruised because of her.

"Lyra, finally!" James rushed towards her, his Gryffindor tie disheveled and not tied correctly. He leaned in to kiss her, but she only moved her head away, making his lips touch her cheek. He frowned. "Is everything alright? I didn't see you yesterday."

Lyra looked up at him, taking in the look of love in his eyes. He looked at her the way every girl dreamed of being looked at. The way she had dreamed of when she was younger. She had to fight harder than ever to keep herself from tearing up. 

But her eyes still shined, but she hoped he couldn't see why. She took a shaky breath, not wanting to answer his question. She wasn't prepared to lie to him. "Could we talk in private later?"

"I'm available now," the Gryffindor shrugged casually, only smiling at her. She couldn't believe how much she had missed him during the Christmas holidays. It hurt to see him again, but she knew that wasn't why. It hurt for a very different reason

She didn't want to talk now. She didn't want to talk ever. But she had to. No matter what she was going to do, she would have to let him know. She was just too scared to do it. "I'd prefer to do it later."

"Fine," he responded, not seeing the inner turmoil behind her eyes. He was just happy she was in front of him again, that he could touch her. But he was a bit peeved that he hadn't gotten to kiss her yet.  "Can I kiss you now?"

"Fine," Lyra agreed, a small, genuine smile crossing her face. It almost hurt to smile now. She hadn't done so in days. It didn't feel natural anymore. 

James grinned widely as he leaned down, swiftly capturing her lips. It wasn't meant to be a long kiss, as they were in public and they usually saved that sort of thing for the privacy of broom closets, his empty dorm or abandoned classrooms. 

But this time was different, not that he knew why. Lyra wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him even closer, even harder. She tried to imprint the memory into her brain, how he smelled, how it felt to have his arms around her. 

She never wanted to forget how right it felt. When their lips would touch, it was like every wonderful feeling and memory they had ever had melted into it. She would do anything not to forget.

The bespectacled boy frowned as they pulled away. She was never one for such passionate shows of public affection. That, along with the unnaturally sad look on her face, unnerved him. "Are you sure you're okay?"

She nodded, trying to contain her sniffles. She turned her head, not wanting him to see how close she was to a breakdown, only to then leave him behind as she rushed towards the Slytherin table to eat. "I'll see you later."

▹▹▹

The sky had turned dark as Lyra found herself in the Defence Against the Dark Arts classroom, waiting for James to show up. She had debated not showing up herself, but she knew she only had a week to make her choice. 

She could have waited, to take as much time as she could. But she knew that whatever choice she made, it would hurt just as much for every day she waited. Maybe, choosing earlier, would give her more time to heal afterwards. 

He peeked his head through, his smile as wide as usual, not seeing the serious look on her face. He messed up his hair as usual, an action that made Lyra want to cry in itself. "What's going on, love? Why are we here?"

Lyra could see him approaching her, probably to grab her hand or pull her hair behind her ear, like a boyfriend does. She spoke up before he could any of it. "I need to talk to you. And this isn't going to be an easy conversation, but it's one I've been dreading."

"Lyra... you're scaring me a bit, not gonna lie," the Potter boy chuckled nervously, his gaze darting back and forth as he tried to contain himself. Lyra could barely speak as she remembered everything, all parts of them that had brought them were they were today. 

There had always been a connection there, since the moment they first met. It seemed unlikely, being as different as tragedies and comedies. They had different pasts and they knew they would probably have different futures. But when James needed someone to listen, she did. When Lyra needed someone to believe in her, he did.

Perhaps that's why she loved him. Perhaps that's why she was about to break his heart.

"I'm breaking up with you," Lyra forced the words out. She knew she had spoken them, but it didn't sound like herself. It sounded more like the woman she had always been afraid of becoming. 

"What?" James frowned, not believing what he was hearing. He only shook his head, laughing to himself for a moment, believing his and the boys' influence had finally gotten to her. "No, you're not. This is a sick prank to play, love. Let's go."

He was only making it harder. She so desperately wanted to go along with it, to say she was only trying to be funny in the worst way possible. But she knew she couldn't. It was too late. "It's not a prank, James. I'm really breaking up with you."

"I don't believe it. Why? Why would you ever want to do this? It makes no sense." He turned his head, calling out for his friends, his voice echoing throughout the empty room. "Sirius? Remus? Peter? Come out, it's not funny!"

"They're not here!" she exclaimed loudly. It only pained her more that he didn't believe it, that there was no part of him that had been able to imagine them going their separate ways. Because the same had once been true for her. "It's just you and me here."

The denial and small smile on his face quickly faded as his face fell, giving his face a twisted expression that she had hoped never to see. "Then why? Why are you doing this? Why would you ever want to do this?"

"Because..." she took another deep breath, knowing there was only one thing to say that could ever convince him that she didn't want him, even if it hurt to say it, or even think it. "Because I don't love you."

James shook his head defiantly. "That's a lie."

"But it's not." She fought to hold back her tears as she tried to say every lie that could convince him, each more unbelievable than the last. "I tried. I saw how much you loved me, and I suppose I liked the feeling of being loved. So I tried to love you back like you loved me. But I couldn't. I can't. And I don't wanna live a lie anymore. And... there's someone else."

"So it was all a lie? Every kiss, every embrace, every I love you? I refuse to believe that," he scoffed, taking a step closer to look deeply into her eyes. "Lyra Cassiopeia Black, get it through your head that we love each other. Nobody could ever come between the love we have for each other."

She knew he was right. They loved each other so deeply, more than she had thought possible. That's why it hurt, because it was so true. That's why she could now feel herself tearing up, no matter how much she fought to hold them back. "Don't make this any harder than it has to be."

Instead of getting sad, James was just getting angry. "You're lying to me, you're lying to yourself. Your bloody patronus changed into a doe because that's how much we love each other. Not just how much I love you, but how much you love me in return. You can't fake that."

Once the first tear fell from the corner of her eye, they wouldn't stop coming, especially when her voice broke with the next words she spoke. She had no more arguments, because she couldn't come up with more reasons not to love him. "I'm sorry." 

He shook his head again. "I can't do this anymore. When you stop lying to yourself, come find me. Because I know you love me, and I know there's nobody else. I don't know why you're doing this, but I know it'll pass." 

He didn't walk away, though. He only walked closer, grabbing one of her hands, dangerously close to catching a glimpse of the now yellowing bruises on her wrist. She snatched her hand back. 

Because she needed him to believe what she was saying. The only way for that to happen was to seem like she believed it, too. So she got loud, and she got angry, and she got convincing. "James! Get it through your bloody head!"

"I never loved you!" she yelled, calming down for a second before continuing. "I barely even liked you no matter how much I tried. And this is why! You're pushy, arrogant and believe you can have anything you want. You can't. I was tired of fighting you and I was desperate for love. But I'm done, because I can't pretend to love you anymore."

James couldn't stay angry anymore. Because those were the words that he had never wanted to hear, the ones he had been insecure about from the start. That she had only agreed to be with him because she was sick of him annoying her. 

Now, he was doing somethings Lyra had never seen him do before. James Potter had started crying. Though he tried his best to hold the tears back, a few escaped. "Dammit, Lyra." 

Now that he had lost his composure, he was forced to realize that this was real. This was happening, and he couldn't be there anymore. So he left, throwing the door open and slamming it closed behind him. 

Perhaps, if he had stuck around for a few more seconds, he would hear her sobbing, silently wishing he had stayed and fought even more, but she knew it was her fault. She had been the one to leave him, so she couldn't blame him for not being scared to leave her.

▹▹▹

Lyra hadn't been able to stop crying since she left the classroom, sneaking past a group of seventh-years in the Slytherin common room, assuring her that the dorm would be at least almost empty. 

The only person in there was Lucinda, who looked at her worriedly once she came in sobbing. And Lyra really needed someone, so she sobbed openly in front of her. "I know we aren't really friends anymore. But I really need you right now." 

The blonde quickly ran into her old friend's arms, crying as she held onto her, comforting her, stroking her hair for what felt like hours of her heart breaking into a million little pieces, all because of choice she had made to protect the man she loved. 

Because losing him didn't mean she would stop loving him. It only meant that she would have to love on her own from now on. No longer with him. It was only her now. 

▹▹▹

James was all alone in the Gryffindor common room. His best friends and roommates had all gone to sleep strangely early, leaving him to sit in front of the fireplace on his own. It had been a while since he had returned, and he still hadn't been able to stop crying. 

"James?" a soft voice asked. A redhead in pyjamas, probably only up because she heard him cry approached him, frowning in concern. Lily Evans was always there for those who cried, especially those who never really did. "Are you alright?"

"Do I look alright?" he retorted, gesturing to his face. His eyes were red, his cheeks puffy and stained from the tears that had been running for ages. And the look on his face was simply heartbreaking. 

Lily didn't know what to do to make it better, but she didn't want him to be alone. She quietly sat down next to him on the couch, taking his hand comfortingly and sending him a small smile, as if to tell him everything would be alright. 

But James knew, deep down, that things wouldn't ever be alright again. 

▹▹▹

A/N: Whatever you do, don't listen to Everytime by Britney Spears while reading the break-up scene. I listened to it while writing it. It works too well. Oh, and thanks so much for 5k votes and over 90k reads! Sorry that this is the way I repay you. Please don't hate me.