100k??? that's so??? weird? like i read these notes all the time. "never thought this story would reach 100k!!" and I'm like "shut up bitch this book is a bop u knew it would reach 100k" and now that's its happening to me?? i understand it??? guys, i really didn't think i would reach 100k. this was some stupid stunt i pulled a year ago to seem hip.

i literally wrote the first twenty chapters of this without seeing the movie or reading the book

sorry this is just so WEIRD for me,, i remember when this had 14k reads and i was like "omfg im famous"

i can't believe so many people like this? yes most of u guys are fack stans but still,,,, the fact real humans are commenting and enjoying this never ceases to amaze me.

here's to 100k! 💞💘

HEADCANONS.

— he listens to an unhealthy amount of ariana grande

— went to pride and carried every single member of the losers club on his shoulders at one point

— he and carole are the only characters in the book who watch voltron, besides stan but he would rather die then admit it

— ( his favorite characters are shay and romelle)

— he's a horrible dancer and will dance at sleepovers just to make others laugh

— he has a pet hamster named mr. tysters, 6 birds, 2 cows, 9 pigs and 21 and he loves them ALL

— his peanut butter cookies are a gift from god herself

— he let everyone think his name was benji for like two years

— he seems innocent but he's the mastermind behind most of the pranks they pull

— distinguished bisexual. doesn't associate with richie 'bisaster' tozier

— slept in a baseball dugout bc he felt like it

— would rather burn off his hand then admit his feelings to anyone

— he did it anyway,,, and we are proud of him

— is afraid of bunk beds for no reason

— records tozier may be a dj legend but honestly he just plays the songs eddie sings in the shower

— has really good balance and is the only member of the losers club (including bev) who can walk in high heels for more then an hour without falling

— he is a a baby and sobs easily, he just doesn't let anyone see it

— was a theatre kid,, probably a musical kid

— beverly, making richie in a crowd: where's richie?
beverly: dear evan han-
* car screeches, cat howls*
richie, running at superhuman speed: -SEN WE'VE BEEN WAY TO OUT OF TOUCH THINGS HAVE BEEN CRAZY AND IT SU

— probably listens to bastille tbfh

— she became a very famous eco fashion designer, and "january embers" became a best selling brand

— she still has a major phobia of blood and being alone in bathrooms

— one time she walked into a building while getting her groceries and for some reason she started to remember a poem and a boy. she couldn't remember who he was or why though. turns out the building was built by a boy named ben hanscom

— the losers club did start to forget each other, but by the time they were 26, they reunited again, and ben and beverly eloped

— she named their first child after kay, a childhood friend she made during her short stay in oregan

— her actual favorite loser was mike, because he would bring her fresh eggs and pastries from his farm when her father couldn't be bothered to buy food

— his favorite character on b99 is charles

— he is a bisexual disaster and we love him

— he is afraid of peacocks so much it's a running joke in the club

— he and patty didn't like each other that much due to how lively patty was and the fact patty disliked how bill had treated audra in the past

— has a byler fan account and won't even deny it

— he and stan got married in the temple, by stan's father, because bill understood how important stan's religion was to him

— he watches voltron but will never admit it (his fave is lotor,,, sweetie)

— he babysat ben and beverly's first kid so much they named the second one after him

— he's so terrible at roller skating the rink banned him because they were 'worried for his safety'

— his favourite movie is x-men 3, but when asked he says it's a documentary about birds

— he tripped on his face while getting an award from the bird watchers society, and spent 3 months in the hospital

— you don't need to hear facts about his death so that's it that's the show!

— he got bitten by brown recluse spider, and his arm fell off. luckily, he survived and just had to get a prosthetic

— he worked at a institution for children with ocd, depression and anxiety since those are all things he went through

— he never wanted kids since they were 'breeding grounds for germs'

— he and richie never married due to richies trauma with the idea of marriage

— everyone signed his prosthetic like an arm cast to annoy him. it worked.

— one time richie pushes him off a boat into the ocean and eddie screamed so loudly the coast guard came to rescue him because they thought he was a 8 year old girl

— she continued to dye her hair odd colours every few years, but pink was the one she loved the most

— she and mike didn't marry until they were 30 because they didn't have the money. until richie was tired of this and gave them enough money to plan three weddings, telling them to "go wild"

— her favorite voltron character is lance. she was a lotor anti since day one

— she broke her leg by trying to stand while sliding down a 20 foot water slide

— she and mike never had kids, but they did adopt foster kids when they were 40 ( betty, shirley and jessica)

— she's a terrible cook and sent patty to the hospital because she gave her burritos so bad she had to get her stomach pumped

— she has a chicken named egg

— she really likes almonds, and has a full cupboard of them

— audra didn't date anyone after patty, because she realized she wanted to take care of herself before others. and while that wasn't bad, it wasn't good in a relationship

— her and patty remain good friends and bake blueberry pies on sunday afternoons

— shes also a cross country runner, but decided the sport was too difficult and instead became a activist

— her and patty didn't speak for a couple of years, by when they reconnected became best friends again, closer then before

— she was the best woman for bill at his and stans wedding, and coordinated the after party included with lots of strippers (to stans displeasure)

— her last name is dawn because stan took a bath in the evening

— she became a plumber due to how unsafe derry was becoming because rotting bodies had been in the water supply for hundreds of years

— she is a baker

— while lots of people critique such a 'pretty girl' becoming something like a plumber, she always says she's helping people, and that's all she cares about

— she dated a woman named joy for a short time, but they separated when joy moved to oregan

— when she was younger, she had a crush on stan uris, but she soon discovered it wasn't a crush, she just really liked his fashion sense and wanted to be his friend