For three days I stayed in that bedroom, not feeling strong enough to go anywhere else.  I watched the first fluffy snowflakes land on the windowsill, followed by the year's first blizzard.  But I was safe, Jasmine and Rose were safe, and I had to keep reminding myself that.  

Rose remained quiet, still unsure about the loss of her brother.  All I could do was provide her a space to grieve, something that I never got the chance to do.  She drew pictures of birds and hung them around my room.

The conversation I had with Jasmine was difficult.  The girl was too young to understand her father's death and her mother's involvement with it, and she cried.  She said she had no one.  But, just like Oliver I kept a stiff upper lip and assured Jasmine that I would take care of her.  And I meant to keep that promise.

On the fourth day I felt lighter, it no longer hurt to take a step.  The Criz was gone.  I made my way into the empty hallway.  For five minutes I just listened to my footsteps echoing off the barren walls.  During the entire time I was ill, my mind kept drifting to Trish and what had become of her.  I would take care of Jasmine, but I had no idea how to help Trish anymore.  I didn't want to see her go to a prison, but what choice did I have?  Her fate was in the hands of the government and S.H.I.E.L.D. now.

I found the medical bay and walked inside.  Trish was there, and I knew immediately that I would have to keep that stiff upper lip.  Her face was hollow, drawn out even more than before.  Her cheeks were pits defined by jutting out cheekbones, dark rings hung around her eyes.  Her hair hung limply around her forehead, her lips were tinted blue.  Trish had grown so drastically thin, I had no idea how she was still alive.  She looked so helpless in that hospital bed and I wanted so badly for her to get better.  No one was around, I slipped into the room unnoticed.

"Trish," I said softly, and she looked at me with a scowl.

Voice a croaky mutter, she asked, "What do you want?"  Her gaze was full of hatred and I felt weighed down, like I was drugged again.  Bleakly, I said, "I'm sorry.  For everything."  

Trish laughed although it pained her, saying, "Why?  You're the good guy now, you've stopped Crimson Night.  Doesn't that make you a hero?"

"I don't know," I confessed.  "I don't know.  I've still done some bad things."

"S.H.I.E.L.D. still wants you," Trish pointed out, "I was wrong.  They aren't going to get rid of you.  I've heard them talking, the government will probably have to work under S.H.I.E.L.D. to prove you're not Hydra or a drug dealer anymore.  It's not a terrible ending.  Better than what's going to happen to me, at least."  The talk was making her weak, and her chest rose and fell with quick wheezes.

I sighed.  "I want to help you, I just don't know how.  But I am going to take care of Rose and Jasmine, that's a promise."

Trish mused, "You've always cared about her more than me."

"Do you regret any of it?" I blurted.

"Yeah.  I was upset at the world.  I wanted to thrive, maybe live for Stacey or some shit like that.  But I really screwed up.  I'm a villain." 

As a look of defeat spread across her sickly face, I shook my head and held her thin hands.  I spoke slowly, a lump rising in my throat, "No...  I still remember that cold night in Russia, the night you took in a young girl and gave her a second chance at life.  Remember that, Trish."  My sight blurred with tears, I darted out of the room.

Maybe Trish's ending was what she deserved, but part of me wanted to see the woman who helped me receive help herself.  But the next day the government ordered her to be sent to a maximum security prison where she'd await a trial.  She would recover in the infirmary there.  I never got to say goodbye, but maybe it was for the better.  

The second I stepped out of her room I sunk to the ground and let the tears flow.  It was a release, and it felt so good and so ugly at the same time.  I was thinking that Oliver was watching me, and maybe now he'd be proud.  That made me cry harder, but the tears were not as painful.