So many teachers I don't fucking know and maybe only vaguely recognize as someone I might've met like 6 years ago when I was in trouble or something know me and they always say hi to me when I pass by them in the halls or something and I don't wanna ask them who they are cuz I feel like I should know who they are since they clearly know who I am and made an effort to acknowledge my existence but at the same time I DON'T KNOW WHO THEY FREAKING ARE!!!

It's worse when they start talking about my classes like, "Oh how's math class with [teacher's name]?" Like... I didn't tell you my classes?? I know teachers talk to each other a lot and that's literally 99% of the reason I have a good reputation with one of the admins, but why does a random teacher know my freaking classes...

It's even worse when they actually try to have a conversation with me because I dunno who they are but if I keep talking to them it's expected I know who they are and I don't wanna end up as friends with some teacher I don't know their name, but now that I'm talking to them I don't wanna ask for their name because they'd realize I was talking to them without knowing who they even are.

There's only been ONE time I was brave enough to ask a teacher who he was and that was because he confirmed it was my first time meeting him. It happened last year too...

My physics teacher and I were having lunch in her classroom {I have no friends so I spend my lunch either alone or with teachers} and this random guy walks in who's clearly a teacher. He starts talking to my teacher about something and I didn't really pay attention cuz I didn't care, and once they were done talking he turns to me and says, "You must be the Shaun I've heard so much about."

I was really freaked out about who could've possibly been telling him about me and I figured whoever said anything had said something bad so in a kinda rude voice I asked, "Uhh... who the heck are you?"

He laughed and introduced himself... TURNS OUT HE WAS A FREAKING ADMIN AND I'D JUST HIGH KEY BEEN SUPER RUDE TO AN ADMIN-

Then he goes on to tell me my PHYSICS TEACHER AKA THE TEACHER I WAS CURRENTLY HAVING LUNCH WITH had been praising me a lot and apparently saying lots of good things about me, which meant my assumption that he'd only been told bad things was also wrong. I was super embarrassed cuz I'd figured he expected me to essentially be a delinquent... and that I was literally talking to one of the highest 'ranking' people of the entire staff team {only person I actually know who's a higher 'rank' is the assistant superintendent cuz my ex-friend's dad was the assistant superintendent so now I'm kinda friends with him}.

I figured after me rudely asking who he was that his entire opinion of me would change because my actions would speak way louder than some praise from my teacher, but before I could get too caught up in my fear my teacher jumped in and started to boast even more about me like a proud mom or some shit {she literally dug through one of her drawers and pulled out a giant stack of papers that was all my work and showed it to him, also how I found out SHE WAS STASHING MY FUCKING WORK-}

That was my experience with the first and only time I've ever been brave enough to directly ask a teacher for their name. Could've gone way worse if my teacher hadn't been there, but it still went at least incredibly awkward in my opinion. The admin at least thinks of me in a mostly positive light despite seeing me two other times not quite at my finest moments, but whenever I see him {even if it's just passing him in the halls} I always think of those first words I said to him and I'm like hhhhhhhh I should've worded that better-

So now I've developed this new epic solution of not wording it at all so that can't happen again :)

...Also help I've told my history teacher too much about myself she knows I was in a mental facility in January and that at one point I was in trauma therapy for 6 months why did I tell her WHY DID I TELL HER THAT'S SO AWKWARD AAAA- pretty sure my teacher thinks I'm a mentally insane freak now :D