“Ngh…”

This feels….different. Soft and warm. I’m still feeling pain though, but it’s not in my head, it’s on my back, and it feels kind of dull now. The atmosphere feels different too. It feels like it’s a little more calmer but hostile at the same time. But…where I was before. How did I get there? Wait. It must’ve been a nightmare or something because it’s impossible for my insanity to take its own form. Yeah, it was a nightmare. So…where am I now? Well, I can tell that I’m laying on a bed, so I must be in a room. But whose room? I attempt to open my eyes as I try to endure the slight headache I have, which have gotten worse from the lighting in this room. It’s all blurry, but I can make out a few things. I was right about me being on the bed, it seems to be a twin size. There’s a dresser on the other side of the room with several things on top of it, also a closet that’s next to the dresser. From all the stuff I can see in this room, only one of them stands out the most and that’s the long, blue hair. It’s Sly and somehow, I feel a little bit better now I know that he’s here with me. I still don’t know what this feeling is whenever I’m around him, but I know I felt it before. Well, all I know is that he isn’t feeling the same right now. I looked over at Sly, who’s a few feet away from me. He’s probably scared of me or something. I don’t blame him though, since I did shove him into a locker, but it does hurt me a little for some reason that he is. With my headache finally gone, I slowly sit up, knowing the he could be on his guard since he looks so tense. Then, I noticed something on my hands, or around my wrists. Handcuffs, they look like the same ones that Sly was wearing earlier.

“I had to cuff you, so you wouldn’t try anything”

I look at him from a side glance, then I looked back at the cuffs. I know that he doesn’t trust me. He has no reason to anyway. He probably hates me right now for what I tried to do. But…if he hates me, then why am I still here? Why did he even bring me here?

“Why did you bring me here?”

“I couldn’t just let you die out there”

He didn’t want me to die? ….I don’t believe him. He saved me so that he could get something from me. There’s no way that he could just save me right there and not expect me to do anything. What is he planning?

“…you don’t talk much, do you?”

Of course. For some reason, I don’t feel like talking at all now. I don’t know why, but whenever I get tied up or handcuffed like this, I stay calm and quiet. As if my mind gets restrained too. I sneak a peek at Sly, who’s still looking at me, more like watching me. A few seconds of silence has passed until he got up and left the room, not saying why or where he’s going, leaving me alone with my thoughts. I have no clue what he’s up to, or when he’s going to call the police for the act of violence. I would be more happier if he did call the police, so I don’t have to be a threat to anyone anymore. But yet…I don’t want to go to prison. I still have that feeling deep in my heart, it gets more stronger each day I see Sly. And…now that I think about it, I kinda know what this feeling is now. This feeling..it makes me feel all warm inside. Relaxed, calm, warm and fuzzy too. This feeling is-

“I need to change your bandages”

My thoughts were interrupted when Sly came in with a small box in his hands labeled “First Aid”. I watch him move to the side of the bed, as he got closer, I looked away, hanging my head and hoping that my long bangs could cover my visible eye.

“What?”

I didn’t respond, keeping my face hidden. Now that I know what this is. I feel a little embarrassed to show my face. Well, I still have my mask on, the same goes with my eyepatch, but still, I don’t want him to see. I felt the bed shift down a little and something touch the back of my shirt. Wait…my shirt? Where did my cloak go? Did he take it off? I look around the room frantically for it, finding it hung in his closet, separated from his clothes. I start to feel a little bit uncomfortable when he lifted up the back of my shirt, revealing the lower half of my back. I can’t see what he’s doing back there, but I can hear him open the box and take out some things. I can feel him slowly peeling the medical tape off of my skin and the gauze still sticking to me from the blood. He takes the gauze off of me and a second after that, I feel something cold and moist on me. It must be a disinfectant, to clean off the dried blood on the area. I hear him open the box that appears to be on the side, taking out some other things from it. After he puts a new gauze on and put a small size of medical tape over it, he puts everything back into the first aid kit and close it, getting up from the bed afterwards.

“Done”

His attitude is somehow different than what I imagined. He saved me from dying, he treated my wounds, he didn’t even call the police. Why is he acting so kind towards me? Well, it’s more like he’s acting hostile around me, but I don’t blame him at all. Still, it’s very strange to see him like this. None of the rumors I’ve heard says that he shows sympathy of any kind.

“Why were you fighting him?”

I look over at Sly, who’s standing across the bed, with his arms folded.

“…it’s classified”

“Tch, right”

It is classified, in a way. It has something to do with my team and it was my decision, he doesn’t have the right to know anything. Well, now that I think about it, he kinda does have a right since it has some part with his family. But if I tell him, he wouldn’t understand. He’ll probably think it’s a lie and really turn me in. He’s already suspicious of me because of my answer, so it’s too late for me now.

“Is everything ok in here?”

I move my eyes to the door where I heard the new voice, finding another person who looks exactly like Sly, just a little bit more feminine.

“Everything is fine, Aoba, just go back to him”

“Oh, ok then”

After that, she left, and it was just me and Sly again.

“Now, let me ask you again. Why were you fighting Noiz?”

“It’s classified”

I heard him sigh in annoyance. If I keep this up, he could just give up on me and kick me out, then I’ll go back to my life. Yet…if he did that, I’ll never see him again. We’ll be enemies, he’ll act hostile towards me every time we see each other. If that ever happens, I don’t know how long I’ll last. I was lost in thought when he sat on the bed, facing me. I didn’t notice him until he grabbed my hands that were still cuffed. I flinch from the sudden cold touch, looking straight at him, wondering what he’s going to do. He lifted my hands up, placing them on his neck like a choke hold. I can feel the pulse in his neck, it’s fast but steady at the same time. It’s warm too.

“..what?”

“I’m just wondering what your going to do”

I’m not going to do anything, is what I wanted to tell him. But I’m afraid to because he might push my hands away.

“Were you going to kill him?”

I was surprised by his question. I want to ease his nerves, so I decided to tell the truth.

“..not now”

“But you were going to before?”

“Yeah”

“Me and my family too?”

I just stare at him, wondering why he’s asking me these questions, especially that one. I don’t remember if I wanted to kill his family, I don’t even remember that I wanted to kill Noiz. All of that was just my disorder talking, I didn’t have any control.

“I wouldn’t kill your family..”

He looks at me with disbelief, then he lets go of my hands and walked out of the room, leaving me alone once again. I thought he would be happy if I told him that. I thought he would be relieved if I didn’t do anything. What did I do, what did I say for him to get away from me? Was it the way I answered? Was is that I didn’t do anything? What? My head is starting to hurt again from all of these thoughts. I wish I can relax but I can’t. Not in here anyway. I don’t want to relax in his room, on his bed…with his smell. Stop, stop, stop, stop. Stop thinking about him and stop thinking about such weird things. Now is not the time to be thinking like this. I’m in big trouble and I don’t know how to get myself out of this. There’s a high chance he could call the police on me for harassment, there’s a high chance that he’ll kick me out and I’ll never see him again. There’s a chance that I’ll lose control again and kill him without even knowing. I don’t want to kill the one I love.