" I can see you hurting
I've been through the same thing
Baby, don't you worry, I got you
I just wanna know you
Tell me all your secrets
Lookin' like you need it "

- I got you by Bebe Rexha

It has been more than a month since she had been touring with the national team. From the starting test series to the ending T-20 matches everything seemed new to her. And even more new and fascinating with all the inside perspective. Well, actually it felt all new and different to her with or without the whole perspective point. For she wasn't aware of even a single thing about this game.

She wasn't ever interested in this game or any sports, to begin with. Her childhood had flown away surrounded with books, music, musical instruments, and the rare athletics events she participated in the annual sports day, and that too because it was kinda compulsory and her grandma wanted her to be the best in the entire school.

She had to be perfect in everything. She had to be good at everything. There was kind of an already made mold for her which she had to fit if not, she was to be shunned. She had to be someone everyone wanted yet no one could actually be. The perfect prodigy. She had to be perfect and not progressive. She had to be great not just great. The greatest.

She was always running in a race. A race for what she didn't know maybe she was like those horses being raced in those oh! popular horse races. Trained to be something in a way that she forgot who she truly is? Every now and then she questions herself who she really is?

She likes the violin because it's classy, grandma told her so but do she really likes the violin? or likes it just because she is liked to like it. She likes oil painting because it was said to be expensive, the supplies were exotic and expensive and can't be used by just anyone- Grandpa told her proudly. He seemed so proud when she chose those over simple pencil sketches.

She liked sketching too, exploring with black, white, and gray. The sketches seem to speak so much by just different shades of the same color yet she couldn't ever admit it in public. It wasn't classy and she wasn't liked to like it.

And so her past month with the national team felt so surreal. Their behavior, their antics, their ways of talking and behaving wasn't something she was used too. It was something that was ever done near her vicinity.

The bromance as the resident vice-captain of the team so liked to point out to her wasn't something she had ever witnessed. She was always told boys didn't show their emotions around each other.

Boys don't embrace. They don't show weakness. Boys don't cry in front of other boys. Proper boys eat like this. They talk like this. They behave like this. Boys these and Boys that, there was such a mental image and expectations of the perfect boy according to her family placed over her.

And all the men she knew for better or worse seem to follow those notions, no breakdown, no loss of composure, perfect, emotionless and all these mental images came crashing down among these men.

Men who wore their hearts on their sleeves. Men who let their emotions flow wildly, happiness, anger, misery-you can see it all in their eyes.

The men who lose composure while playing video games screaming and crying over the virtual loss. The men who are afraid of injections, lizards, spiders, water, or heights. They seem human not the invincible greater than life people she was told they were.

They got hurt, they cried, they bled, they smiled and they lived.

And it all seemed so unfathomable to her in the beginning. Men weren't supposed to be like this. Men weren't supposed to be just like her, humans. They were supposed to be some godlike perfect beings far superior than mere women. Well, at least that was what she was always made to think, that was what she was taught by her grandma and family. 

Wasn't this the reason Omav was supposed to be the heir even when she was better and more capable than him? Wasn't this the reason her all-powerful grandma bowed down to her grandfather? Wasn't this the reason why no one stopped her father when he left but everyone protested when Ritisha wanted to go? Wasn't this the reason the final decisions are always made by grandpa or bade papa?

She didn't know all her life she was made to think so and suddenly it all crashed and shattered like an illusion. Everything told to her seemed like a lie.

And it's not easy to let go of those fractured pieces, she still gets surprised by the boys' open display of affection. Still cringed watching them steal food from each other's plate and gaped watching them feed each other stuff.

Still, she gets surprised when they embrace each other to hide their tears from the world but not each other, never each other. Everything seems new to her. A new life where the rules are there are no rules and it's hard for her. It feels so hard to let go of the rules she grew up with but she is trying.

She isn't as used to all this stuff as Ritisha seemed to mingle with them like water in water. Ritisha - the wild Oberoi child living an expectation-less life seemed right at home with the boys. While she the golden bird of the Oberoi's was the odd one out.

It was so hard for her to mix with the boys. She was the cliche girl with no common interests. She was made to be the perfect trophy wife- beautiful, intelligent and talented but that's it. She is the odd one out here but she is trying.

Really trying and learning. Learning a new way to express herself. A new way to say "I love you," and a new way to live. And a new way to be free of everything laden on her and told her from childhood. Everything that seemed utter foolishness now. And she is making new friends.

Rohan or Ro, as he likes to be called loves to discuss books with her. He doesn't cringe when she discusses Pride and prejudice, The Namesake or The Suitable boy. He doesn't roll his eyes at her and asks her to talk about something more manly. He just smiles in a similar kind of listener way of his and gives equal importance to all the literary novelties. They talk books as a distraction or as simple common ground and she feels strangely happy when her ramblings on books draws him out of the gloom of a lost match. 

Agastya or Gya and Harvik or Harry, as everyone calls them seem to know how to make conversations flow seamlessly. They talked from anything to everything and involved about everyone in their conversations and stories or "boasting" as the rest of the team deems it was and it was a unique experience of how to be friendly loving and insulting at the same time.

The team seemed like a very big family to her. The kind of loving bickering joint families she had just heard about in old stories. They seemed so to her. All aware of each other. All strangely comfortable around each other in spite of their cultural differences, language barriers, different traditions, and ways of living.

From a tea stall owner's son to the PM's grandson all in the same team and it seemed to not matter whether or who the person was before entering the team. 

Right then, they all were just Indians and a tightly knit family and more than once she felt like intruding in something beautiful. Something she wasn't made for, something she couldn't be. For she knew she couldn't ever be as accepting as them. The words, the things taught to her from childhood won't let her. Even with all these her most favorite in the team was the team's captain.

Viaan Kundra- the man with the best understanding smiles, carrying her luggage before she could make an utter fool out of herself. She wasn't used to carrying her luggage herself the way Ritisha and the rest of the team was and Viaan saved her from that embarrassment. He observed and cared for the whole team. And with her limited knowledge of the game, she knows she is being totally biased but for her, Viaan Kundra was the best Indian Captain ever.

And She kinda despised his deputy, Swadhin Raizada or Savvy as he was called by everyone has been the totally irritating fellow. He just won't let her flaws rest. He will tug at them. He called her princess and teased her mercilessly every time she slipped. Every time she appeared confused or unaware, he relished in making her feel worse and she totally disliked the obnoxious guy. She can't believe how can the kind guys like Vi and Ro put up with this savage Savvy? And maybe, she truly didn't understand friendship for their dynamics confused her more than quantum physics.

And yet, here she was walking in between a complaining Savvy and Ro in there hotel premises back from their practice session. She knew she didn't need to follow them to their every practice but she liked to do so. Watching them play and goof around fascinated her. So, back in the hotel premises walking between a group of bickering and sulking boys as they had been prohibited from visiting home while playing this series. She thought again about the days spent with these boys and how they had kinda become friends to her. Even Savvy. For he was the first person she fought with, she was never the violent kind but he makes her feel very violent.

"Okay, so see ya all in a bit," 

She heard Viaan speak with a sigh as he entered his room leaving Ro, Savvy, and her to continue down the path to their rooms. Agastya and Ritisha had gone somewhere after practice and Harvik had a pretty model to catch. The rest of the player's rooms were either on the floor above or below them. And so, she was walking with Savvy and Ro towards Ritisha and her room. Savvy seemed to still complain about something which she had expertly tuned out and it seemed Ro had too. They were about to take the turn when someone jumped in front of them with a strange mask yelling odd things.

She won't admit it ever but the three of them had screamed in perfect sync at the top of their voices and the odd mask person had broken down into fits of mad laughter. And she didn't know why will someone laugh like this making them feel so terrified and who was this person anyway? She thought confused but from the identical scowls on Ro and Savvy's faces, it seemed clear that this was a prank on them and they know that person. Was it someone from the team? She thought confused as the person pulled off his mask. 

"You look ridiculous sparky," 

Shivaansh Kundra taunted savvy dryly and She couldn't imagine her eyes. Shivaansh Kundra can't be so childish, can he? He won't go pranking people like this. He can't be so childish. Her grandpa has given his example as the perfectly composed man. The style icon with perfect composure and manners and yet, here he is jumping on people with a scary tribal mask and being utterly childish. What her life had come too?

"You're the sparky vampire," Savvy rebuked with a scowl

"Now, you're just being disillusioned, sparky"

And as she watched open-mouthed, Savvy and Shivaansh bicker there in the corridor like school kids. She couldn't believe her eyes. How can they bicker just like this? Don't they care about their images or stuff like that?

"GUYS," 

The loud yell of Ro broke the bickering kids and both of them turned to Ro with identical glares. 

"Where's Aaina?" Ro asked Shivaansh ignoring Savvy's betrayed look and Shivaansh lit up like the Cheshire cat. She watched as Savvy and Ro exchanged looks while she passed Shivaansh a tentative smile.  Anyone who could irritate Savvy like this was good to her.

"Viaan," 

Both the boys yelled in sync beside her and made a beeline for Viaan's room. She followed behind them. Not understanding what all this was about. She didn't even have time to scold Savvy as he barged in Viaan's room without knocking. 

"INA-my love," 

She heard Savvy yell on top of his voice and the scene in front of her was totally bewildering. Savvy was twirling a girl happily in his arms as Viaan looked at him with a mixture of fondness and annoyance and Ro rolled his eyes. And she felt her breath stuck somewhere between her Nasopharynx and Oropharynx. The girl being twirled in Savvy's arms was a girl she knew all her life yet never really knew, like many things in her entire life.

The girl that giggled in Savvy's arms and hug Ro like she had been doing so her entire life seemed to halt on her steps watching her. There seemed to be a storm in the girl's eyes and a typhoon in her soul and at that moment, she decided to embrace the typhoon.

"Hello, I'm Omisha Oberoi," 

Omisha forwarded her hand to the girl in front of her. A girl she might have never known in her entire life. Her family had been wrong about many things and She is ready to give the blue-eyed scion in front of her all the chances to prove her family's words wrong again and again.

"Aaina Randhawa," 

Aaina took her hand with a slight upward tilt of her lips. The history of Shivanya and Omisha left behind as two known strangers got acquainted with each other again.

"To new beginnings," 

Their eyes conveyed.

Tell you no lies, 
We can get lost, 
Let me be your friend.

Let's finish what we started,
It's all I ever wanted.

~to be continued~

So, here's another filler chapter. We will jump back to Aaina's thoughts from the next chapter.

And yes, I know Om and Shivaaye didn't fit Omisha's description of men but she truly doesn't know them and appearances can be deceiving.

Tell me, what do you think of this chapter and Omisha's thoughts.

And did you like this chapter or not?

Stay safe and take time to love yourself, appreciate yourself, and be kind to yourself too.

I'll meet you in the next chapter.