[Author's Note: If you see this, it means I put link to music that helps me into mood as I write this chapter. Feel free to listen to them as you read on. Let me know what you think! Happy Reading]

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Flashes of the memories flooded my vision. It had become too much, consuming. I didn't have it in me to pull myself away from the images before my eyes.

A pair of strong, big arms eventually pulled me back from the mirror. I stumbled back and felt my feet gave up beneath me. I met Haldir's concerned eyes. They were flickering between me and Lady Galadriel in alarm.

I followed his gaze at Lady Galadriel and was startled with what I saw. The impossibly beautiful elf was now on the floor with her husband, Lord Celeborn, kneeling beside and had his arms protectively around her as he spoke comfort to her in elvish. Both of their eyes were trained on me, shock and worry were in Lord Celeborn's eyes. For the first time, I saw pain and fear mingled in his wife's blue eyes. The sight only magnified this new feeling I had nestling in my chest. I tore my eyes away from them.

What is this feeling? Why does my heart hurt so much?

My chest felt raw; like I suddenly discovered a sudden gash of wound manifested in my heart. It was painful, too painful–something that I would never ever wish, even on my worst enemy.

My mind began to recall all the vision that I saw in the mirror. Lost memories. It was all too much. My mind was jumbled, scattered all over the place as I tried hard to make sense of it all.

But the harder I tried, the more it didn't make any sense.

Eventually, I rejected the vision in my mind. I rejected the life that I had been having for the past few months in Middle Earth, despite deep down in my heart, I knew everything I saw was the truth. My reality.

But I couldn't accept it. I wouldn't. This life I had now, and the life I had then–both didn't make sense.

A gasp left my throat when pain pierced through my heart at the memory that was now imprinted deep within my mind and soul; unbearable. I brought my hand to my chest instinctively in a failed attempt to ease the pain.

Scratch that. It was not just pain. It was something destructive, something demanding and insatiable, crueler than sorrow.

It was agony.

Break my fingers again one hundred times. Hit me like the worthless human being that I was one hundred more times. Kill me again, over and over–I'd take them all and be grateful.

I'd take anything, anything but this pure and raw agony deep in my chest.

Anything than being in this world. Anything than existing.

This is a nightmare. I can't be here. This is impossible. This isn't real. I belong in Washington, with my family, not in a fantasy land!

Realizing where I was and the denial that came with it, I jerked away harshly from the elf's hold on my shoulder and backed away. Using my hands to support me, I crawled backwards on the ground, away from Haldir.

My eyes finally took in the look that Haldir, Lady Galadriel and Lord Celeborn had. The three elves stared at me with concern and wariness etched on their impossibly beautiful faces.

I had to get away from them. They weren't real. None of the way they look was normal or humanly possible. The fact that those creatures actually stood before my eyes, flesh and blood staring me in the eyes, frightened me to no end. I thought I was going mad.

Confusion, fright and terror overwhelmed me. I let my emotions guide my feet as I scrambled away from the elves–from all of this nonsense. I broke into a run, but my feet were as if they were made of lead. I stumbled as I bolted from the courtyard and abruptly come to a stop as my eyes met with the frantic faces of my so called companions.

Aragorn, Legolas, Frodo and Boromir.

Oh god. They can't be real. This is a nightmare. I am losing my sanity.

One of them, the elf, approached me. I shrieked in terror and stumbled on my feet. He had always been a fantasy to me. Now, he was a fragment of my crazy, demented mind. I must be hallucinating.

Maybe he is my torturer. Maybe he comes to hit me again. He comes to ruin me once more, and my brain can't take it so it compensate by showing me a fantasy character.

He took a wary step towards me. Fearful, I sobbed, frightened at the proximity between us, of what new ways he would try to inflict pain on me. My fingers dug the dirt beneath me as I desperately clawed for support. I felt my lips and my palms cold with fear.

The elf froze at my reaction. Willing past my fear, I pushed my trembled body to move. I stood up, ran and stumbled towards the direction of the vast forest of Lothlorien. Staggering past everything and anything.

'You shall have the time you need to accept your fate. Until then, come back for us when your heart is ready,' I heard the she elf's soft voice in my mind. Thinking that I was crazy, I ran faster with all my might.

I ran as fast as my unsteady feet could take me, as if my life depended on it. My heart raced in my chest, my lungs burned like fire inside of me. Fright sent adrenaline rushing through my veins as I willed myself to escape all this insanity and the agony that came with it.

Please, please. Let me escape this nightmare. Wake me up!

***

[Legolas POV]

I was sitting on the ground, cross-legged; my body relaxed in my meditation stance. My mind was in sync with the peace that the mellorn trees and the earth below me offered, though I could still hear Aragorn conversed in small voices with Frodo and Boromir.

A screeching, agonizing scream pierced my ears, straight to my heart. My eyes shot open. Terror hit me as I recognized the owner of the sound. In an instant I was on my feet, my eyes wide in alarm. I strained my eyes to look towards the direction from which her scream came from. The others were already on their feet too, all tensed. They heard her as well.

I locked eyes with Aragorn for a split second before we all came to a collective agreement: to find Leane.

We ran to the direction of Lady Galadriel's courtyard. In my mind, I suspected that the enemy had broken into the city. I halted at the sight of Leane who staggered away from the courtyard, only to stumble in her track as she saw us. Haldir was right behind her, looking distressed yet not drawing his sword.

There was no attack.

The look Leane had on her face was nothing like I had ever seen in my entire life before; it was horrifying. Even more terrifying to see such expression on her face. Horror and agonizing pain struck her tears stained face. Her complexion was almost ashy, pale as if she was just seeing a ghost. To my alarm, her eyes flickered wildly, disconcerted with panic. Never before I saw fear so maddeningly tangible on someone's expression.

My heart constricted painfully at the unnatural sight. Of all my time walking the Arda, I had never felt this miserable in my entire life, up until now. An instinctive need to come to her and take away her pain shot through my veins; the raging storm in my heart won't cease until I do so.

Grief and fear looming heavily in the air around her. Against my will, I moved towards it. There was nowhere I'd rather be.

I didn't feel my feet move, yet move I did, wanting nothing more but to just hold her, to tell her that she was alright. I merely took a step towards her, but already Leane recoiled in fear.

From me.

I froze, shocked to see her scrambling to back away from me. I didn't know why, but she was terribly frightened of me.

The pain that was suffocating my heart became multiplied as I watched her got on her unsteady feet to run away to the opposite direction. She staggered on her feet, running into the woods. Running for her life.

I was about to follow her when Lady Galadriel's voice rang in my mind.

'Leave her be, Legolas Thranduillion. None of us can help her. She needs to face her own demon before she can come back to us.'

I turned my head towards the courtyard. The Lady of Light stood, using her husband's arms for support. I was confused at her words. Shock hit me as soon as I studied her, finding sorrow and fear on her usually calm, collected expression.

What kind of evil could possibly ailed her in such a way? It is unheard of.

'I saw through your companion's mind as she looked into the mirror,' she answered my internal question telepathically, then her audible voice was heard for the rest of us.

"Not one of you should come to her. Leave her be; no comfort from any of us will be of any help," she ordered sternly at the rest of us. I saw Aragorn and Boromir shared confused, worried glances at each other.

My heart felt sick, knowing that I couldn't come to her.

'And as for you, Legolas. I see your heart yearns to come for her. Therefore I am sending you along with my marchwarden to follow and keep an eye on her. For in such perilous time, evil ever lurks, even in the safety of Lothlorien's woods,' she said. 'But pay heed to my order: Do not approach her unless her life is in any imminent danger. Stay in the shadow.'

I looked up and nodded my thanks to the Lady of Light. Haldir approached me. With a silent agreement, we entered the woods and jogged to follow Leane.

She would be out of the sight for mortal eyes, but the elves were gifted with sharper and clearer sights, so we could see her from afar.

She kept on running and running. Her long, raven dark hair flew behind her. The running was endless, unrelenting, as if she was being chased by death itself. The run only ceased when she stumbled on a tree root and fell. Instinctively I moved faster to approach and help her, but before I take another step further, Haldir stopped me. He gave me a look and shook his head, reminding me of Lady Galadriel's order. I was frustrated, but unreluctantly obliged.

I and Haldir watched warily as she didn't get up again. Suddenly a shrill of a heart wrenching cry broke out of her mouth, shattering the air. She threw her head back as she wailed and let out a painful strangled sounds.

My eyes began to sting as her pain reverberated violently through the air. She angrily hit the ground beneath her over and over as she screamed in anguish, all the way until her strength gave out. She laid on the ground, hands fisted on the dirt and dry leaves below her as angry tears shook her body.

Something in my heart broke. The only thing that kept me from looking away from her was the will to watch out for her, to keep her safe. By now I was sure that her agonizing cry will haunt me for the rest of my life.

I clenched my jaw in frustration. "Let me go to her."

Haldir snapped his eyes to me for the second time and gave me a stern but sympathetic look.

"I could see that you care for her immensely, yet Lady Galadriel's instruction was clear. We are not to approach her unless she is in imminent danger."

I swallowed the acid that I almost throw at the marchwarden, knowing that he was right. I watched her, but the more I saw anguish shook her frail body, the more her pain became mine, threatening to cripple me. I couldn't take it anymore. I looked away, unable to look at her curled body, shaking out of control as she wept.

"Mom..." she sobbed in between her strangled breath.

Her mother. What happened to her mother? What did she see in the mirror?

"Grant," she gasped. "Oh Grant, I'm so sorry..."

Her cries went loud again. She wailed, her anguish radiated off of her and hung darkly in the air. I could do nothing but watch as she suffered, my own heart shattered to pieces with every sobbing breath she took.

When will this torment end?

Her anguished cry went on until her voice gave away. It turned into violent sobs that wracked her body. Soon she fell asleep in exhaustion. I craved so bad to cradle her and lock her in my arms. I looked to Haldir.

"No, mellon nin, as much as we want to go, we cannot. We mustn't question Lady Galadriel's judgment. Remember, we are here only to keep her safe in the border, not to comfort her," he said sternly though I saw regret and sadness etched across his face.

We stood there in silence, under the cover of the shadow until the sun set. It was nightfall, but we still watched over Leane. She laid on the cold ground, weeping occasionally in her sleep.

***

[Leane POV]

I woke up to the darkness around me. Feeling numb, I lay there on the cold hard ground, ignoring the biting chill on the air against my skin. After a while, I forced myself to sit, my eyes flickered to the sky.

Lothlorien was indeed beautiful, even when it was still dark. A reddish hue on the horizon let me know that it was going to be sunrise soon.

I sat there and looked faraway as the sun rising. My heart still clenched sickly in my chest, raw and painful from the recent revelation; but my mind was clearer.

I remembered what happened yesterday. Lady Galadriel was right, I shouldn't have looked into the mirror. Knowing is an ill fate, ignorance is bliss. I wish I could take it back, but I couldn't. Now I had to live with the consequences forever.

I looked down at my ring and twisted it on my finger, lost in thought. Grant died protecting me. A stray tear slipped from my eye. Guilt threaten to drown me as I think about his wife and two kids. What was going to happen to them now that he's gone?

My family was incredibly hurt by my passing. Another tear escaped my eye. I sniffled, wiping my wet cheek with my fingers. I wished I had spent more time with them instead of burying myself in my self achievements and work.

Now there was no turning back for me. What's done is done and my fate was already set in stone. I couldn't go back home to my world because I simply didn't exist there anymore. I died.

Does that make me a ghost now?

Watching the sun rises, I couldn't help but think that maybe, just maybe this world was a second chance for me. This life. It was tough, but maybe I could do something good here and atone for my mistakes that I had done in the past. Maybe by destroying the Ring then Grant's sacrifice would not be in vain.

My people had caught the North Korean terrorists in DC. My country, my family– everyone I knew was safe. My family finally moved on and accepted my passing. They even found their own happiness. After all these years, my mom finally found someone. Jake eventually married the woman he loved. They were all happy and doing so good, even without me. My lips upturned into a small, wistful smile at the thought.

I knew that after yesterday, my life would never be the same anymore. I felt dead inside, numb, yet still living. I realized that I couldn't just keep on weeping and burying myself in self-pity while the world around me was heading towards destruction. I couldn't let the panic attack I had yesterday to stop me now.

Everything was suddenly clear. I knew in my heart what my purpose was: to see that the fate goes as I knew it would, the Ring destroyed, my companions safe and Aragorn crowned king to restore the peace throughout the land.

I find it ironic that both in my previous and current life I always found myself in the company of leaders–presidents and politicians; kings and princes.

I found my resolve and forced myself to get up. I closed my eyes, trying to sense many emotions that came from the city of Galadhrim, ignoring the loud ones inside of mw. I walked my way towards the source of hundreds of faint emotions in resolve. Had I not have the gift, I wouldn't know which way to turn back to.

I walked and walked. As I reached the entrance of the city, I straightened my back, and took a deep breath. I calmed myself and marched towards the courtyard, eager to find Lady Galadriel and resolve everything.

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[Author's Note: This chapter was so hard to write, even proofreading it took a long time. Please let me know what you think and feel about the chapter. I hope you enjoy the angst and the depressive chapter. If you do leave me your comment and vote ♥️ I promise next chapter won't be as painful as this one. Love y'all awesome readers 💚]