Hi Lovelies!  Sorry for the very late (well, missed actually) update!  I'll try my best to keep to my regular weekend schedule in the future.  Well, we're making a bit more progress in this chapter...but as always, I let the love story progress very slowly - so sorry for everyone who's thinking 'just get on with it already' LOL.  Also, there is some material in here that some people might not be happy with - but please read that part all the way through before eviscerating me 😲 - I hope it comes across okay.  And I hope you're all still enjoying!  Please send me comments to let me know your thoughts.... and also, vote vote vote!  Thank you to everyone who is still reading!

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The throbbing in her head is what eventually woke her.  Ow.  She thought, rolling over to glance at the small clock on her nightstand.  Her eyes widened.  Noon.  It was fucking noon.  She hadn't slept this late since her university years.  It wasn't that surprising though, given that she hadn't fallen into bed until 4:30 AM.

Taking a deep breath, she sat up slowly.  Fuck that hurt.

She was hung over, plain and simple.  Yesterday had been a long day, and she'd definitely drank way too much when their party continued last night.  They'd all lounged around, just casually relaxing - drinking, chatting, and listening to music.  It was a nice, low-key wrap up to their New Year's celebrations.  It wasn't till about 4 AM that Rose announced she was done, and that she wanted to leave.  Ben and Kay decided to go with her, all sharing an Uber for their ride home.  Once they'd left, Rey had simply donned her PJs and fallen into bed – not even stopping to wash her face.

Slowly climbing from the bed, she stumbled into the bathroom, grimacing as she looked in the mirror.  Although she'd looked beautiful the day before, unfortunately the late night combined with the copious amounts of alcohol she'd drank were now coming back to haunt her.  The remnants of her make-up were smeared everywhere, there were dark circles under her eyes and her face definitely held a note of grey-toned pallor.  Ugh.  Not good.

Turning on the shower, she stripped out of her clothes before stepping under the hot spray, relishing in the feel of the warmth on her tired, lethargic body.  She stood there for a long time, trying to find the energy and the will to move.

After her shower, she slowly made her way into the living room.  Finn was sitting on the sofa watching sports highlights.  Catching sight of her, his eyes widened in amusement.  "Oh, man.  You look like shit."

"Thanks Captain Obvious."  She shot back, gingerly walking into the kitchen to take some headache medicine and make herself a coffee.

She could hear Finn chuckle from the sofa.  "You're welcome, Little Miss Sunshine."

"Fuck off Finn."  She replied, proceeding to down the ibuprofen before making her cup of caffeine.

A few minutes later, she slowly sat down on the sofa next to him and closed her eyes, gently sipping her coffee.  Finn studied her quietly.  "Are you hungry?  I could make you some food if you want.  Maybe a piece of toast?"

She turned a little green at the suggestion.  "Fuck no.  But thanks."  She took a deep breath and inhaled the scent of her coffee.  "No food just yet."

"Okay.  Just let me know.  Also, I was going to see if you wanted to go for a walk and get some fresh air, but...I'm guessing not?"

"Uh uh.  Nope."  She inhaled deeply.  "I really do feel like shit.  I'm just going to lounge around the apartment all day, and see if I can feel better by tonight.  Maybe tomorrow?"

Finn nodded back at her.  "Of course."  Glancing out the window, he went on.  "I might go anyways, if that's okay with you?  It's a really nice day, and I'd really like to get out for a bit.  I need some air."

She waved her hand at him dismissively.  "Absolutely.  You go – I won't feel slighted in the least."

"Okay.  Maybe I'll leave in another hour or so."

After Finn left, Rey grabbed a blanket and settled down on the couch for a nap.  The last thing she remembered was cursing the shots they'd done at around 3 AM, vowing never to drink tequila ever again.

She woke a few hours later feeling much better, and much to her surprise, hungry.  Deciding that it was time for breakfast, she got up and made herself another coffee, as well as some bacon, eggs and toast.  Inhaling the smoky scent, she smiled to herself.  It was silly, but bacon always made her feel better.

Once she was done eating, she tidied the kitchen, and looked around for something to do.  She really was feeling much better.  Her headache was almost completely gone, and she seemed to have her energy back.  Hmmm.  What to do?  She didn't feel like reading – her head was still a little tender.  Glancing at the clock, she noted that it was 4:30 in the afternoon.  It was starting to get dark, so Finn would probably be back soon.  Maybe they could watch a movie?

Suddenly her phone rang.  Grabbing it off the counter, she could see Ben's name on the lock screen, and smiled.  "Hey Stupidhead!  Your timing is fortuitous!"  She could almost hear his eye roll on the other end of the line.

"Hey Technogeek.  How are you doing today?"  He asked quietly.

His voice sounded a bit flat to her, but she answered his question.  "Ugh.  I woke up so hung over and felt like shit.  I've spent the afternoon napping and just ate breakfast a few minutes ago."  She told him.

"Oh.  Okay.  Never mind then."  He said, disappointment in his voice.

She heard it again – that note of something in his voice that alerted her that everything wasn't quite right.  "No – its all good.  I'm feeling much better now.  What is it?"

"It's okay Rey.  It can wait."

She blew out an exasperated breath.  "Ben.  Something's wrong.  I can hear it in your voice.  Please tell me."

"Its not something I can really talk about over the phone.  Can you come over?  If that's okay?  I'll come pick you up – the streets are pretty quiet."  He offered.

Her heart sped up, worried about what might be going on.  This was so unlike Ben.  He'd never acted like this before, asking for her to come over to talk.  A flicker of unease whispered through her.  "Of course Ben."

She could hear him let out a breath, sounding like he'd been holding it in.  "I'll be there in about 10 minutes."

"Okay, see you then."  She replied.

Hanging up the phone, she looked down at her yoga pants and tattered T-shirt.  She headed into the bedroom to change her shirt, deciding that the yoga pants would be fine.  Checking the time again, she became nervous, hopeful that Finn wouldn't return before she left.  She suspected that it if he did, her leaving would turn into an argument, and if so, she'd rather it happen after she got back.  Throwing on her coat and shoes, she grabbed her keys and went downstairs to wait for Ben.

It wasn't long before his car pulled up.  She quickly got in, thankful that she hadn't encountered Finn.  "Hi."  She said, closing the door.

He nodded, watching her as she buckled her seatbelt.  "Hey."  He could see her glancing around outside, as if looking for someone.  "What are you looking at?"

"Oh.  Finn went for a walk earlier, and I......I just didn't want him to come back right now.  I'm sure later he'll ask about where I went, but I wasn't feeling like getting into it just yet."

"Ah."  He said knowingly, then swallowed.  "Thanks, Rey, for agreeing to come over."

"Of course!"  She replied.  "You know I'd never say no!"  She waited for a few beats.  When he didn't say anything, she prodded.  "Sooooo.  Are you going to keep me in suspense?"

He took a deep breath and shook his head.  "Not yet.  Let's wait till we're at my place."

"Ooooo kaaaaay.  You know you're killing me here?  I'll admit – I'm kind of worried."

His gaze flicked to her for a couple of seconds and then back to the road.  "It's nothing you have to worry about – I promise."

She gave him a tense smile and exhaled deeply, feeling a bit calmer at his reassurance.  "All right then."

They drove the rest of the way in silence, Rey sensing that Ben was lost in his thoughts.  When they got to his apartment, she quickly made herself comfy on the couch.  "You want something to drink?"  He called from the kitchen.

"Sure.  Water is fine.  But a soda of some sort would be great though if you have any."

A minute later he sat down beside her, handing her a ginger ale.  "Thanks.  That's perfect actually."  She smiled.

"I figured if you were hung over, you'd prefer that."  He shrugged.

Taking a sip, she snuggled back and waited for him to start talking.  He was leaning forward with his elbows on his thighs – a clear posture of distress for him.  He inhaled deeply before looking over at her.  "Kay ended things this morning."

Rey's mouth formed a small 'o', and all she could do was stare at him in mild shock for half a minute.  "Oh.  Oh Ben."  He nodded back at her, remaining silent.  "So, you weren't the only one feeling it."

He laughed derisively.  "No.  Apparently, she's been feeling it for a long while – but didn't want to hurt me.  So, instead, she pulled away – bit by bit, slowly but surely – hoping that it would make it easier on me when we eventually broke up."  He sighed.  "Honestly, I know what she was trying to do, but...."

"But it dragged it out, and confused you, and made you feel bad."  Rey finished quietly for him.

He nodded once again.  "Yes."  He said emphatically.  "I'm not sure how she couldn't see that."

"Did you tell her that?"  She asked quietly.

"I did.  She understands that now, and feels awful for doing it that way."

"Good."  Rey said succinctly.  "Well, I guess your romantic evening is off."

"Rey, I'd already cancelled that a couple of weeks ago."  He told her quietly, noting the surprise on her face.  "Things began to get a lot clearer in the last few weeks, and I knew that there really wasn't any point to it."  He took a deep breath.  "I was going to end it after the Holidays anyways."

"Oh."  She replied quietly, her eyes widening.  "I guess that makes sense.  Did she tell you.....why she finally decided to do it?"

He laughed derisively once again.  "This is the good part."  Rey's brows squinted together as she looked at him, waiting for him to go on.  "She....."  He took another deep breath, his uncertain gaze locking onto hers before croaking out.  "She says that she prefers women."

Rey's mouth fell open in complete shock.  "Kay is gay?"  She asked in amazement, her voice rising in disbelief.  "Seriously?"

He nodded.  "Yup.  She told me that she's known for quite some time.  But, her parents are extremely old fashioned, and she didn't think they'd ever understand.  So she's only ever dated men – but did it for their sake.  She says she now realizes how wrong that was – that she's never ever really been happy – or comfortable – with it.  Obviously."  He sighed.  "However, she said that I've been the most patient and kind of any of the three guys she's dated – which is why it lasted the longest."  He laughed again, shaking his head.  "So my patience – my respect for her – probably helped to drag it out even longer."

"Ben – "  Rey tried to interject, but he didn't let her finish.  She watched as he clenched and unclenched his fist repeatedly.  Her heart broke for him, wanting to help him deal with his distress.

"No, let me get this out."  He said, running a hand through his hair.  "She told me that she was really sorry, and didn't mean to hurt – or use – me for so long.  She said she just wasn't brave enough before, and hoped that I wouldn't hate her for everything."  His eyes flicked up to hers.  "She's finally decided – and I'm actually proud of her, even though it still stings – that she's not going to live her life based on worries about what other people might think.  So, she's coming out."

"Holy shit."  Rey exclaimed, still stunned.  "Wow."  Her mouth was still hanging open as her eyes met Ben's.  "Ben."  She stuttered.  "I'm glad for her – really – but....I don't even know what to say...."

"I'd say it explains a lot."  He replied sarcastically.

Rey watched him carefully.  Underneath the surface, he wasn't sad or disappointed.  He was actually angry.  Reaching over, she put her hand on his shoulder.  "Hey.  I know it wasn't right.  But you know she didn't mean to hurt you.  That's not in her."

"Hurt me?  Rey – I've felt like half a man for a very long time!  I should've known that we'd never really connected.  And she's never liked sex – well, with me anyway - at least now I know why – but it made me feel incompetent and inadequate.  Like I had no clue what I was doing.  Like I was a shitty lover.  And no matter how much you told me that that wasn't the case, how could you possibly know?"  He bit out in frustration.  "I've had enough mind fucks in my life – I did not need that on top of everything else!"

She blinked, not having thought of it like that.  Leaning forward, she wrapped her arms around him in a reassuring hug.   "I'm so sorry Ben.  You're absolutely right for feeling that way.  She did use you.  It was extremely selfish for her to have stayed with you for so long...."  He could hear her voice raising, getting angrier as she continued.  "And the way she did it, probably did fuck with your head.  But its over now, and hopefully you know that none of it was your fault.  No matter what you did or how hard you tried, you would've ended up right here."  Pulling back, she looked into his eyes determinedly.  "It was not your fault.  Understand?"  She said harshly, pulling away from the embrace and giving him a small shake for emphasis.

Gazing into the eyes that were angry on his behalf, it was like something suddenly clicked and everything around him became crystal clear.  From the moment that Kay had said the words, it had felt like something inside of him had instinctively reached out for Rey – simply needing her presence to calm him – to center his thoughts.  He'd known that she was the one person he could talk to about this, that she'd understand what he'd gone through, what he was feeling, and be righteously angry on his behalf.

The green flecks in her eyes were glittering, and although he could see her anger, he could also see – and feel, her compassion – sensing that she knew exactly what the experience had done to him.  Because she understood him.  Like no one else.  He shuddered out a breath as a puzzle piece fell into place, and a lightbulb finally clicked on.

He looked at her with suddenly fresh eyes – his mind reeling at 1000 miles a minute, as realization dawned.  It was her who was meant for him, not Kay.  They were meant to be together.  He knew it in the very depth of his soul.  If there was one thing that he was learning from his Uncle's preliminary teachings, it was that everything happens for a reason.  While our choices directly affect the paths we take in life, there are forces beyond our control that influence those choices.  And even if we choose to take a different path, those forces will nudge us – bend us – back to the path we should be on.  His life so far – with Snoke, and even with Kay – were perfect examples of it.

All that had happened between them – their chance encounter in Mexico, their growing closeness, their family connection – was leading them somewhere.  And he was suddenly pretty sure about where that was supposed to be.  Together.  He didn't think she loved Finn – not anymore, at least – but she was stubbornly clinging to that relationship for some reason.  However, now that he could see the big picture, he would wait.  Patiently.

He wouldn't do anything to sabotage her – she'd hate him for it if he did.  He couldn't even let her know how he felt – because that in itself would be an act of sabotage.  She simply needed to figure it all out on her own – let her own choices – and those forces – guide her.  So he'd sit back, continue to be her best friend – just like she was his – and give her time to come to the same realization.  He just hoped that eventually she would, before they were old and grey.  There was a possibility that it might take awhile, and that their path might be a bit more tortuous than expected.  She was so damn stubborn and hated to fail at anything.  He was pretty sure that she'd see things not working out with Finn as a failure, and because of that, staunchly refuse to give up on it.

That didn't mean, however, that he was just going to sit back and watch it all unfold from afar.  While he wouldn't sabotage nor confuse her, he would be honest with her about her relationship with Finn.  If Finn acted like an asshole or treated her like shit – he'd tell her.  If Finn became a model boyfriend.....he sighed....unfortunately he'd tell her that too.  However, he couldn't worry about that now.  He'd have to let everything play out as it would – let those forces work their influence.

Taking a deep breath, he gave her a thankful smile.  "I do understand Rey.  I really, really do."  He said, pulling her close once again, desperately hoping that one day, he could hold her like he really wanted to, and show her.....a shudder coursed through him at the thought... show her just how much he loved her.

Rey was confused for a heartbeat.  One minute she was giving him hell, and the next he was smiling at her with something in his eyes that she couldn't quite identify, telling her that he understood that it wasn't his fault.  When he pulled her back to him and hugged her tightly once again, she sighed in contentment, finally feeling that he was no longer angry.  He actually felt...peaceful and accepting to her – almost balanced somehow.  But then she thought she felt him shudder, which made her clutch him even tighter, lest he get angry once more.  "Feeling better?"  She asked gently.

He pulled away from her and smiled once again.  Tucking a stray strand of hair behind her ear, he replied, his voice deep and almost husky, the dulcet tone resonating through her.  "Yes.  You have no idea how much.  Thank you Rey.  I was feeling so.... off balance, and I needed to talk it out...."  Looking away in embarrassment, he said.  "After thinking about everything for the last few hours, I knew that I needed to talk to you."  He glanced back at her and swallowed thickly.  "Just you."

She smiled warmly.  "I'm glad you called me.  I would hate to think that you would've sat here – all of this spinning around in your head, with no one to talk to.  You know that you can call me any time and tell me anything – absolutely anything.  I will always be here to listen.  And I will always be here to help you with whatever you need.  Always, Ben."

His heart soared at her words.  Was he reading more into them than he should?  He wasn't sure, but it strengthened his resolve to follow this new path he'd chosen.  He'd have to tread carefully, but he'd support her when she needed him, and he'd wait for her to have the same epiphany that he just did.

Now that he'd recognized the depth of his feelings for her, it would probably kill him to continue watching her with Finn, but he'd have to accept it – and get used to it.  It might be something he'd have to do for a long while.  His heart clenched at the thought.  He certainly hoped not.

Could he actually bear to watch her spend the rest of her life with Finn?  Marry him?  Have his children?  The thought made him nauseous, and generally left a bad taste in his mouth.  However, it might have been the taste of blood from biting his cheek so hard.  He gave himself a mental shake, trying to refocus his thoughts.  

Taking another deep breath, he gave her another brief smile, nodding slightly.  "Thanks."  He told her.  "I am feeling a bit better.  I'm still a bit pissed – and probably will be for awhile yet, but talking it out with you – rationalizing it out with you - definitely helped."

He sighed.  "Even though I'm still mad at her, I actually do wish Kay well, and hope she finds some happiness.  I can't imagine what she went through – hiding herself for so long.  Maybe that's why she always seemed to be so introverted.... And perhaps this will be the catalyst that actually brings her out of her shell.  If her parents love her – and I know that they do - I hope they'll understand and support her, despite what she thinks they might say and feel about it."  Glancing up at her, he shrugged.  "But, that's for her to deal with.  Perhaps one day I can be her friend again, but right now, I just need some time and space to process it all – and to forgive her for deceiving me for over 2 years."

"But enough of that."  He said, more to himself than her.  Reaching out, he gave Rey's hand a quick squeeze.  "Should I take you home now, or do you want to stay for awhile longer.  I can order in some food...?"

Shaking her head, she replied.  "I wish I could – but I'd better go.  Things seem to be okay with Finn, and I really don't want to rock the boat again."  Pondering for a minute, she grabbed her phone and texted Finn.  "I'm just going to see if he wants me to bring dinner home."

Ben nodded, watching as her face scrunched up into a puzzled expression.  "What the fuck?!  He's not home yet.  But its 6 o'clock.  He left around two.  Finn would not take a 4 hour walk."  She continued texting with him, her face still confused.  Looking up at Ben, she shook her head.  "He said he met a colleague for coffee and lost track of time.  He'll be home in an hour."  Raising her eyes to meet Ben's, she looked perplexed.  "I mean, its not a big deal, but.... Fuck it."

She turned her attention back to her phone once again and sent Finn another text, explaining as she typed.  "Okay. I told him that got bored, am hanging here and would be home in a couple of hours.  And that he's on his own for dinner."  Smiling across at Ben, she asked.  "So, what should we order to eat?"

Ben smiled back at her, his eyes twinkling.  "You choose – I'm in the mood for anything."  He told her.  As long as its with you.  He added in his head.

****

"So, I've been thinking."  Rey told him, waving her fork in the air as she tried to talk and chew at the same time.  She watched as Ben raised an eyebrow and the corner of his mouth twitched slightly.  "Fuck off."  She replied in response to his look.

"I didn't say anything."  He shot back innocently.

She rolled her eyes and tried again, with a bit more emphasis.  "I've been thinking... that I might quietly try to search for a little more info on my parents.  You know, from before.  When they were still in the UK."

"No."  Ben's voice wasn't sharp, nor loud, but his tone held a note of finality that left no question about his position on the matter.

Her eyes narrowed and her brows furrowed.  "Oh come on!"  She replied.  "After I've had some time to dissect it all, I think that maybe we overreacted.  I just want to know where he worked, what he did, the type of stuff he researched.  All of that.  Don't worry, I'll be really careful."

"Rey.  No."  His eyes now appeared angry.  "You heard Obi.  Your parents were clearly frightened for their lives – and rightly so.  This kind of shit just doesn't go away."  He shook his head at her.  "Whatever it was – it was big.  And it was bad.  For Christ's sake - they changed their fucking names!  And they still died!  You knowing what happened to them is not worth the risk of whoever did this finding you."

She growled in frustration.  "But Ben – its been 20 years!  No one is looking for me!"

"You don't know that!"  He yelled, slamming his fist on his thigh in frustration.  "Rey, when I was with Snoke, I was exposed to a lot of shit.  Big picture, illegal shit – sometimes involving huge corporations, and even governments.  You wouldn't even believe some of it!  Many have long memories – and almost endless resources to make sure that secrets stay secret and that their asses are covered!  So trust me when I tell you that with just the smallest crumb of info, if they want to – they can find you!"

Rey was taken aback – her heart pounding – both in anger at his apparent heavy-handed concern and at some of the details he'd divulged about his former 'job'.  "You were involved in stuff like that?"  She whispered quietly.

He immediately looked away, ashamed.  "Indirectly, yes."  He replied quietly.  "I sometimes helped...."  He inhaled deeply.  "...come up with plans to ensure things happened, or that secrets didn't get out.  That type of stuff."  His eyes flicked up to hers in regret.  "Nothing I ever did specifically planned or required anyone to....die."  He swallowed.  "But I can't say for sure that no one did."  He was silent for a minute before adding.  "Its how I knew that I had to leave..."

"Oh Ben."  Rey whispered, grabbing his hand.  "I'm sorry."

"Don't be."  He shook his head.  "I'm the one that has to live with it."  He looked away again before steeling his resolve and glancing back at her.  "I.....still have......connections.  From before."  He told her uncomfortably, not sure about how much he should tell her.  "Professionals, who can search for and find things without leaving a trail."

"Oh."  She said, her face showing confusion.

Fuck it.  He thought.  "I've......already asked them to look into it.  Extremely carefully."

Her mouth opened slowly as she gazed at him, stunned.  He could see her eyes begin to well up with tears, as a small, thankful smile appeared on her face.  Her voice was filled with quiet wonder.  "Ben...."

His throat closed up, not sure what to say.  He hadn't wanted her to know.  Had wanted to do this on his own – in case they found something that she couldn't know.  Or, in case they didn't.  

He sighed.  "Its just a preliminary look Rey.  Its slow going – and very meticulous.  And very, very covert."

"But you had them do it.  For me."  She concluded, and he nodded.  Her face suddenly became questioning.  "Does it cost money?  I'll bet it does – and its probably a lot.  How much, Ben?"

Turning away briefly, he looked back at her, his expression blank.   "It depends.  Don't worry about it."

"Ben."  She warned, but he just stubbornly shook his head.

"I said don't worry about it."  He replied mulishly.

"I do not want you spending your money on this!  This is my problem!"

"They're my connections Rey.  And they'll only work with me – not you.  So, my connections, my money."  He told her obstinately.

Growling, she jumped up and started to pace around.  "Fine – I get that.  But you have to at least let me pay you back!"

His lips twitched, a small smile teasing at their corners.  "Okay.  I'll send you a bill when its all over."

Her eyes narrowed again.  "You have no intention of telling me how much it really costs, do you?"

He smiled back at her in wry amusement.  "Not really, no."

She stopped and glared at him, placing her hands on her hips.  "Ben."

He stood too, moving closer to take her hands in his.  "Rey.  I knew you'd want – no, would need - to know what happened – if possible.  If not, it'll probably haunt you – remain a huge question in your mind, and even a hole in your heart – for the rest of your life."  He looked intently into her eyes and squeezed her hands tightly.  "I have the contacts, and the means to do this.  Please, don't be angry.  Let me do this for you."

As she gazed at his earnest expression and the look in his eyes, her anger and frustration dissipated.  He just wanted to help her – and based on what Obi had told them, wanted to be sure that she was safe.  Maybe this really was the best way to do it.  Sighing, she replied resignedly.  "Fine.  But what about the thing in my hip?  Should we maybe think about having it removed?"

Pondering for a minute, he shook his head.  "I don't think so – not yet at least.  Depending on what we find out – if anything – its probably safer to just leave it where it is for now."

"Okay."  She let out a breath.  "You'll tell me if they find anything, right?"

"Yes."

She narrowed her eyes at him once again.  "You promise?  You'll tell me and you won't hold anything back?"

Irritation briefly flashed through his eyes when he realized that he'd have to tell her everything they found – no matter how good or bad.  He sighed, his concern replaced with quiet resignation.  "I promise I will – when there's something to tell."  His conscience twinged a bit, at keeping the initial info from her – that it was related to a biological weapon - but he didn't want to have her freak out and worry over nothing.  Inhaling deeply, he added.  "I'll never lie to you, Rey."

Smiling softly, she replied back.  "Same here, Ben.  I'll always tell you the truth – I don't think I could ever hide anything from you anyways."  She shrugged, chuckling sheepishly.  "You know me too well.  Sometimes it's a little freaky – like a part of you is inside of my head somewhere, because most of the time you know exactly what I'm thinking or what I'm going to say."

Suddenly, something sparked in his eyes as he gazed back at her, causing her heart to beat frantically.  Realizing he was still holding her hands, she could feel him squeeze them just a little tighter, and something soft fluttered in her chest.  Huffing out a breath, she swallowed and looked away to break his intense stare, trying to shake off whatever this was that was unexpectedly flowing between them.

She gently pulled her hands away, and gave him a gamine smile.  Keeping the mood light, she teased.  "Okay then - that's settled.  You've got people working on it and you'll tell me what they'll find.  Now, let's get back to our dinner.  I'm still hungry!"

Ben's lips twitched again.  "By all means.  I'd hate to see what would happen if I stood in the way of that."

Sitting back down, she shoved a forkful into her mouth, smiling with full cheeks.  "I'd strongly recommend against it.  Finn will tell you that he's afraid to lose a limb if he keeps me from food!"

He just laughed and shook his head.  "Noted."

"Also, I need to be getting back soon.  Its almost eight o'clock – and he's probably getting annoyed.  I have to go on a two-week trip – week after next – so I'd like to try to stay on his good side until I leave."

"You shouldn't have to go out of your way to stay on his 'good side' Rey."  He said sternly.

"I know – I just don't want to rock the boat."  She smiled.  "But this should be the last trip for awhile.  My new assistant Temiri starts Monday – so he'll be coming on this trip with me.  After that, he should be able to go on most of the site visits, and I'll only have to deal with the installs.  My next scheduled trip isn't till the end of February, so after this I should be home until after Finn and I get back from the Bahamas."

Ben gave her a nondescript smile.  "Hopefully that will make him happy."

"I hope so too."  She smiled back.

When Ben dropped her off at her apartment a half an hour later, she turned to him, feeling somewhat shy.  "Are you okay?"

"Yes."  He nodded.  "Like I said earlier, I'm not upset that its over with Kay.  I'm a bit – relieved, actually.  I just feel used though.  Hopefully it won't take me too long to get over that."  He shrugged.  "I don't know - it could be never...maybe."  He said on a sigh.  "We'll see, I guess."

Rey leaned over and squeezed his hand.  "Let me know if you need to talk some more."

"I will."

She took a deep breath.  "Thank you – again – for.... trying to find out about my parents.  Its....."  She struggled to come up with the words.  "Its one of the nicest, selfless things anyone has ever done for me."  Leaning closer, she kissed his cheek.  When he glanced at her in surprise, he could see a softness in her eyes.  "You're such an amazing, caring, compassionate man, Ben.  I'm sure that one day you'll open your eyes and the perfect woman will be standing right in front of you.  One that'll fall head over heels in love with you – and you with her."  She said with complete certainty.

Suddenly, he felt a huge lump in his throat, and his eyes glistened slightly.  Powerless to speak, he simply nodded back at her slowly, thinking I already have....

"I'll see you soon?"   She asked earnestly.

Clearing his throat, he replied.  "Um, I'm not sure.  Maybe?"

"This is supposed to be one of our dinner weeks, but I'm not sure if you want to keep doing them now that....."

His eyes widened.  "Aw shit, I never even thought of that."  He said regretfully, running a hand through his hair.  "Maybe we should hold off on the dinners for a bit – until you and Finn are on better footing.  It might seem weird if its just the three of us."

"Okay."  She replied sadly.  "Let's grab dinner or something this week though – just you and me.  Or else we won't see each other for three weeks."

"Sure.  I'd like that."

"Maybe Thursday – like we were supposed to?"  She asked hopefully, and he nodded back.  "Text me and let me know for sure."

"I will."

She gave his hand a final squeeze before getting out of the car.  "Goodnight Ben."

He watched until she walked through the door to her building, giving him a final wave before it closed behind her.  Sighing deeply, he put the car in drive and went back to his lonely apartment.

****

She was surprised to find the apartment quiet and dark when she unlocked the door and walked inside.  Checking her phone, she noted the time.  It was eight thirty, yet Finn still wasn't home.  She immediately texted him.

'Hey – everything okay?'

'Yes, sorry.  Be home shortly.'  Came his quick reply.

She felt that it was a bit odd for him to have been gone so long, but didn't really think much about it.  Feeling tired, she quickly headed into the bedroom to change into her pyjamas and brush her teeth before climbing into bed with a book.

It was shortly after nine when Finn came home.  He strode into the bedroom a couple of minutes later, surprised to find her in bed so early.  "Hey, still feeling shitty?"  He asked.

"No, just tired now.  I'll probably fall asleep soon."  She yawned.  "That was a really long walk."  She smirked.

He shrugged.  "I guess a lot of people were bored today.  While I was wandering around on my walk, one of my colleagues texted me and asked if I wanted to meet for coffee.  I knew you were kind of out of it, so I said sure.  We ended up just hanging out and chatting, and when you weren't going to be home for dinner, we decided to grab a bite too.  We went to Pusateri's, and it was fabulous."  His face was scrunched up in bliss.  "I had the lobster tortellini."

"Really?  You're teasing me with that?"  She joked lightly.

"Sorry."  He replied sheepishly, his face reddening.  "I'm going to grab a shower."  He told her, walking into the bathroom.

When he was done, he came out wearing only briefs, still drying his hair with a towel.  "So what prompted you to go to Ben's this afternoon?"

"Once I woke up from my nap and ate a late breakfast, I was really bored.  And Ben called with some news..."

Finn stopped, looking at her curiously.  "What kind of news?"

She put her book aside and leaned back against the headboard.  "You're really not going to believe this....."