"Oh, c'mon, Em! You still can't be mad that I mistakingly told Blake," Olivia speaks as I glare at her during the lunch break. "It has been days since you got to know."

"Do you know how things work between us?" I sneer at her. "He wouldn't shut up about it. I've actually been trying to avoid him."

I miss out the part where it has cost me a no-sex week. Blake cannot stop smirking every time we're discussing something non-work related because I know exactly where his head is at. 

"What did you tell him again?" Sam pipes in after he's done making out with his food. "Have you tried these noodles, guys? It's so amazing."

And, we lost him again.

"I told him he's the best she's ever had."

"Oh." Sam shakes his head, snickering. "You never tell a guy that."

"See!" I slap her shoulder with the back of my hand. "It's a rule."

Olivia rolls her eyes dramatically. "Stop overreacting. I was drunk! Didn't Nick tell you you're the best he's ever had? You're both equals."

"Shit, seriously?" Sam chuckles. "What the hell did the two of you do which made it the best? I got a date this weekend, and I can definitely use some tips."

I glower at him but don't respond. It's not as much about the label of best. It's just... with Blake, there's so much rush, passion and desire following our every move. He knows where to touch me that would drive me to the edge, and somehow, I've been able to figure out exactly what drives him crazy as well. I can't believe I'm daydreaming about having sex with Blake. I need to get a grip on myself.

We're almost done with the lunch when I see Genesis approaching me with a smile on her face. She nods politely and smiles wonderfully at my friends before turning to me. I try not to let my thoughts overwhelm me when she takes a step closer to me.

"I haven't seen you in so long." She whispers.

My brows furrow together in utmost confusion as I give her a quizzical look. "What?"

"It's been a while. How about dinner tonight?"

Olivia and Sam have stepped back a little and I can hear them murmuring amongst themselves as I try to wrap my head around what Genesis is talking about. Did she hit her head somewhere?

"Have you forgotten that we're done?" I whisper yell at her, ensuring to keep my expressions straight to avoid attention in the lunchroom.

"You can't still be mad about the conversation that day, Emily." She rolls her eyes, her hand coming near mine before I jerk it away. "Seriously?"

"Yes, seriously, Genesis. I'm done with you, for real. The only relationship we share is that of a boss and an employee." I snap at her before moving away.

"Emily." I hear her speak through gritted teeth as she takes ahold of my wrist. "Don't be dramatic, you'll regret it, trust me. What we have doesn't come easily."

I scoff at her words. Yes, it doesn't come easily at all. It comes with a lot of constant thoughts that make me question my self-worth.

"You aren't worth the pain, Gen." I give her a small smile before walking away.

"What the fuck was that?" I hear Olivia whisper beside me.

"Are you okay?" Sam asks me and I nod, sighing.

"We ended things, or I did. It's done with." I shrug and immediately feel a pull on my sleeve that holds me back. Olivia is staring at me with a small smile on her face but then I feel Sam wrapping his arms around me from the back. "What?"

"We're just very, very proud of you." Olivia hugs me.

"Yeah, it couldn't have been easy, yet you did it."

I push back the tears that threaten to spill as my feelings overwhelm me. These are happy tears anyway. I'm so grateful for these two idiots in my life.

"Aw, you guys." I wrap one arm around Olivia while the other one goes around Sam's neck at the back. "Don't make me cry now."

Sam kisses my hair before stepping back and Olivia tightens her hold for a second before doing the same. I smile at them and they nod at me before we make our way back to doing the work.

It could've been a lot more difficult with Genesis if I was in love with her, or even loved her as a person. But I didn't and she only has herself to blame for that. She never once in the last eight months exposed a part of herself that was worth loving, or let me into her world. I was there in her life, but always at an arm's distance. That's not how you learn to love someone.

When I sit back at my desk, Blake looks up from the screen. "I mailed you the final module for tomorrow after the changes."

"I'll just check it. Are you ready otherwise?" I ask and he nods, smiling a little.

I like how confident he is in his work and himself. I go through his mail before turning to him.

"This is perfect. Just put mental cues and practice once with yourself. You got the rest." I smile at him, earning his dimpled grin in return. "Now, go eat! You can't skip lunch."

"I'm not really hungry." He shrugs, putting his chin on his palm as he stares at me. "You realise that I wouldn't be showing up next week?"

I mentally groan. I've been avoiding this topic in my head for too long now. It's difficult to imagine going back to my old desk to sit across Alyssa and avoid her glares all day.

"Alyssa will really miss you." I grunt, typing a mail to Eric regarding Blake's final module.

"Alyssa?" He frowns at me in confusion. "Seriously?"

"Yeah, please tell me you're aware she has a crush on you."

He clicks his tongue, leaning back in his chair as he crosses his arms across his chest. "Now that I think of it, I'm sure she does."

I snap my eyes at him. But then there's a cheeky grin on his face. He laughs under his breath before leaning forward to flick at my nose.

"Admit it, Emma. You're going to miss me."

Yes, idiot. Of course, I'll miss bantering with you. But you don't have to know that.

"You aren't dying, Blake. I'm sure I'll still find you lounging on my couch." I roll my eyes.

"Lounging on your couch, in your bed, between your legs."

"Oh my god!" I stare at him wide eyed, reaching out to swat at him which makes him laugh out loudly as he moves away. "You aren't helping your case, Blake."

"You can only resist the best thing only for so long." He winks at me, a deep flush taking over my features.

"Watch me live the rest of my life without it." I give him my sinister smile. "Good luck finding these boobs, this ass somewhere else."

"Hey!" He scowls at me. "This is between you and me, don't bring that in between."

"Too late." I grin. "Now go have lunch, seriously. It's not healthy to skip meals."

He rolls his eyes before getting up and leaving. When he comes back half an hour later, I'm engrossed in work so he doesn't disturb me. I'm not going to be the first one to give in to the temptation of sex. We're going to have to play our game for a little longer.

When the clock strikes five, I leave the office while he stays back a while longer. I know I'm not going to see him today anymore because Nick is on a date with Myra. Sometimes I wonder what does it feel like to have a partner, to have them love you or how does it feel to be in love.

I've seen my parents my whole life. They make it seem like it's a beautiful thing, like it's all that they live for. I've seen them be each other's support even during a fight, and sometimes I just wonder if I'll ever have that with someone. It's not because I'm lonely or desperate, it's simply something that has crossed my mind ever since I hit puberty.

What I had with Kenny was childhood crush turned into a mandatory dating because we were best friends. We broke up soon after, remained friends and hooked up after graduation, followed which she left for Ohio, and we never stayed in contact.

The others I dated were more just the starting phase of relationships before we broke it off for one reason or another. Genesis has been my longest partner. Had. She was my longest partner even if it was strictly sexual from her side.

After having dinner, I dial my mother because it has been around ten days now and I'm starting to miss her. We've exchanged a couple of texts, but this is the longest I've gone without talking to her.

She picks it up in the second ring, "Em?"

"Hey, Mom."

"Hey, kid. How are you?"

"I'm good, you?"

"Things are good at home, as always."

I sigh, not liking how formal this conversation is going. "Yeah, but how are you?"

"Fine, managing." She sounds incredibly tired.

"Have you not been sleeping well?" I frown, worry clear in my voice. "Mom, you know you need to sleep right. You tend to get anxious otherwise."

"Yes, yes." She breathes. "I'm fine, sweets. I promise. Now, tell me, are you still mad?"

God, for once I wish she could beat around the bush. I shake my head to myself. "No, I'm sick of being mad."

I'm tired of constantly being on the edge of emotions. It's been better since I've started maintaining distance from Genesis. But I'm tired of being angry at her, my mother, my biological father, myself, basically, at life.

"Are you okay?" She asks, her voice soothing as always.

"Yes, I'm okay. I'll be home next week for Caiden's birthday. Can I gift him a new phone? He's using your old one right now."

They wouldn't even given him that if it weren't for his stay backs at school for football practices. I remember I didn't have a phone until senior year even when all my batchmates had it. Those two believe a phone can ruin you forever. I kind of agree with them.

"Do you have savings?"

No. But I'll adjust.

"Yes."

"Okay then, just don't go over the top." She reminds me. "I missed you, honey."

"I missed you too, Mom." I sigh. "I'm going to go now. Goodnight."

"Night."

After she hangs up, I start cleaning the kitchen despite my body desperately needing the sleep. I'm about to head for the bedroom when there's a knock on the front door. I immediately frown when I realise it's almost eleven in the night. Nick wouldn't have knocked, he has the key.

I open the door, surprised to find a little nervous looking Blake. He waves at me with a small smile.

"What are you doing here?" I ask. "And why did you knock? You have a key."

"I forgot to carry it." He still doesn't step inside. "I didn't think I would be, but I'm a little nervous for tomorrow and I couldn't seem to sleep. Can I please, please stay the night with you?"

My first thought is hell yes. The second thought is to remind him that I'm not his girlfriend and he cannot come over when he's not able to handle his emotions because that isn't what I'm here for. My third thought is to tell fuck off to my second thought. So, I listen to it.

"Does this mean you're giving in?" I wiggle my eyebrows, trying to lighten the mood.

Honestly, my heart is squirming in my chest at the thought that he came to see me just so he could spend the night here. He has his own selfish motive, but he came here for comfort. I should honestly be freaking out right now because this definitely means a little bit of strings but I don't care at the moment.

"No. It just means I'm desperate and I want to sleep next to you, not with you." He clarifies and I roll my eyes, opening the door further for him. I try to ignore the constant thumps of my heartbeat that just seem to exhilarate every time he says things like that.

"You know the rules. No shirt, no pants." I point to his clothes and he grins before reaching down and picking up his suit bag for tomorrow. I hadn't even spared it a glance until he picked it up. He heads straight for my room as I lock the door behind myself.

No one has ever wanted to sleep next to me before. Damn you, Blake!

When I enter the bedroom, Blake is hanging his clothes in my closet. What happened to no strings, seriously? I don't comment on it but rather go to lie down on my side of the bed as he comes around to his. We have our separate sides of beds. Fucking hell.

Even after eight months of sleeping with Genesis, we woke on different sides of bed every once in a while. Blake and I have slept-slept together around ten times and we already have fixed sides. I don't like this one bit.

"Are you overthinking this?" He asks, unbuckling his jeans and stepping out of it next second.

Does he always have to know what's going on in my head?

"No." I shake my head, shifting to face him as he lies down by my side.

He's not even touching me and I can already feel the warmth between us. My skin yearns for his touch and I almost let out a breath of relief when his hands come around my waist to pull me closer. I can feel his gaze so I meet his eyes, biting on my inner cheek as I stare at him.

"What are you thinking?" I ask.

"That I never in a million years could've imagined that I would be lying and sleeping next to you." His voice is low.

"Is it a good thing or bad?" I ask, my hand reaching out to stroke his cheek.

"Good, definitely good." He smiles.

I lean forward to kiss him, and although I do miss sex so incredibly much but right now, as he moves his lips softly against mine, I feel more than satisfied pulling away. There's a very low hum in my heart as I wrap my legs around his.

"Night, Emma." He kisses my hair before I fall asleep.

My alarm clock wakes me up with its annoying sound in the morming and I reach out to snooze it when I realise that Blake isn't in bed anymore. I scowl before turning off the alarm and getting up to see that his clothes from the chair where he kept it last night are gone too.

Did he leave already?

I get out of bed and make my way down the hallway but then I hear Nick and him talking in a hushed voice so I take a step back before they can spot me.

"We didn't even have sex, man. Chill out. We were literally sleeping." I hear Blake tell him.

"I would've worried less if you were having sex. Seriously, who has sleepovers with their friends with benefits?"

"Don't use that term." Blake snaps at him.

"What, friends with benefits, fuck buddies? That's what the two of you are and you're far too up your ass if you think otherwise."

Fuck. Seriously? I thought Nick was cool with us. But I understand his worry. I really cannot blame him. He's just looking out for his friend.

"I've got it under control."

"Just remember Blake, she's older than you and has more experience with this stuff."

"And how old is Myra again?" Blake sounds a little pissed. Shit. He shouldn't be fighting with Nick over this.

"That's different," Nick says with a dismissive tone.

"How?" Blake laughs bitterly. "How in the world is them being older than you different than Emma being older than me?"

"Emily does not have feelings for you, that's how it's different."

I don't miss the way Nick corrects my name. Before they can start arguing further, I walk into the living room and Nick's eyes meet mine. He offers me a small smile. They are sitting on the kitchen island, sipping on coffee. I notice that Blake is dressed up already except his jacket is missing.

"Morning beauties." I smile at them before turning to Blake. "Are you leaving early?"

"No. You mentioned you want the bathroom free between certain timings when he moved in, and he was out so I took the opportunity."

He remembers something that I mentioned more than a month back. It's such a tiny detail. I'm in a sour mood after eavesdropping on their conversation but his words make me smile. He's so damn considerate, it's unreal.

"Thank you." I kiss his cheek, not being able to hold back. "I'll get ready and then we can leave?"

"Sure." He gives me a tight lipped smile but I try not to read too much into it.

While taking the shower, all I can think about are Nick's words. Emily does not have feelings for you. I swallow down the thought that comes to counter it and tell Nick to mind his own business. When I dress up in the room, Blake is still out there so I quickly get ready before going out.

"Subway or car?" I ask, picking up the toast that's lying on his plate on the island.

"Anything's good with me. What are you more comfortable with?"

"We'll take the car. C'mon. I don't want to get late because of traffic."

He nods, picking up his jacket to wear it. Normally, he just wears button down and pants but he looks extremely hot completely dressed up. I let my eyes roam over his body before they come to rest on face and he's staring at me with a small smile of his face but it's not the playful one like it usually is.

"C'mon, let's go." He ushers me out.

We stay silent for most of the car ride because it's literally filled with music. I can see him tapping his foot continuously which makes me reach out to put a hand over his knee.

"You'll do great," I tell him without looking at him as I park the car.

He pulls on my sleeve when I'm about to unlock the car, his hand reaching for my neck as he pulls me towards him. His lips meet mine almost instantly as he lingers on the kiss for a few seconds before we part away.

"What was that for?" I ask, a little breathless.

"Need my good luck charm." He winks at me before unlocking the car and stepping out.

Cue the flutters.

No, Blake. You can't say that stuff to me.

I gulp from how this makes me feel as I step out, trying to suppress the weird emotion. He's usually here before me so it's a little weird walking in with him. But he doesn't comment on that. He puts on his confident aura on as we approach the desk.

"Is it before lunchtime?" He asks and I nod.

"Yeah. I got some last day work for you to do, after that I think you just need to come collect official record documents for the University."

He nods in return. I mail him the tasks before getting back to making HR reports for the upcoming conference. It's only a few weeks away now and I'm glad to be a part of it because it reflects well on my resume as an additional thing.

I don't want to settle myself to Cox and Bell permanently. It's a good company, but I don't even plan to stay in New York for the rest of my life. Larkspur is the best plan I've had so far. If I were to even end up alone, I'd adopt a kid and settle down there.

Parker's intern had her training yesterday and it went pretty well from what I've heard. By the time clock strikes for Blake's session, he's just looking more and more confident.

"Good?" I ask him as I pick up the flashdrive that has his presentation.

"Yeah. If I screw it up, is it going to effect my paycheque?" He asks and I laugh, shaking my head.

"No. Don't worry about it. You'll do good but paycheques are guaranteed regardless. It might effect the recommendation."

"Well, I need that too for my grade and future prospects."

I nod at him in understanding. When we enter the room, Eric is already there. He greets Blake with a handshake and turns to me. I smile at him before helping Blake set things up.

"Please tell me this is going to be better than Parker's." Eric comments when employees start coming in. "Genesis will chop my balls off if he screws this up."

His words immediately make my skin prickle. "Genesis is coming?"

"Yeah. She was busy yesterday but she said she'll make time for this one." He wiggles his eyebrows at me. "Guess why."

"I ended things with her." I blurt out, making sure Blake is out of the earshot.

"Shit, seriously?" Eric gapes at me. "I thought you guys were solid."

As if. No one knows that we were inclusive and it was just about sex for her. I just shrug at him, smiling a little before I see the conference room filling up.

It's only minutes later Parker and Genesis enter the room laughing. Blake's eyes immediately snap at me and I just shrug in return. I didn't plan this, seriously, and I did promise him to get her here. Only now she's here without my preference. I'd much rather have her not attend this.

"Emily." She smiles at me sweetly before turning to Eric.

I want to say I missed her, but no part of my thoughts or emotions would agree to that. Her face is just a reminder of how low I've let myself fall to run away from my problems.

"Ready, Blake?" Parker looks at him. He nods in response.

"Legal matters, right?" Genesis turns to Blake with an expectant yes but he frowns in return.

Before he or I can actually protest, Parker nods, clapping his hands. "Yes, he's training on legal matters. Let's get started."

Fuck, no.

"Emma?" Blake pales, staring at me.

I'm the one who told him Employee Engagement because Parker told that to me only when it was just the two of us.

"Parker." I start but he ignores me completely, pulling a chair for Genesis.

Panic rises in my chest as Blake stares at me like all the confidence is being sucked out of him. No, no, no! Parker, you asshole.

"Are we waiting for someone in particular?" Genesis looks between the two of us.

"Gen—"

"No. I'll just get started, give me a second." Blake gives her a tight lipped smile, avoiding my gaze completely.

I turn to Eric. "Parker screwed up."

"What?"

"He gave me a different session topic, Eric. He's supposed to be training on Employee Engagement."

Eric frowns at me. "Emily, that's literally what his intern trained the bunch on yesterday. These are newly recruited people from different departments. It's a part of their job training."

"He said accounts department. Dammit!" I curse under my breath. "Did you not check the final module I sent you yesterday?"

"No. I'm sorry." He gives me a pity smile.

"What do I do?"

"Why is he so calm?" Eric points at Blake as he pulls me to take a seat on the chair.

I don't respond to him because honestly I really don't know. Blake clears his throat, catching everyone's attention and my eyes flicker to Genesis for a second. She winks at me, followed by a smile and I grit my teeth together before looking away.

Blake is glancing between the two of us before he shakes his head as if snapping out of his own thoughts. "I'm taking a little traditional approach here and going without the boring powerpoint. So far, so good?"

Everyone nods and a smile takes over his face, his dimple reflecting through. Just like that, he has attention of all the women as they settle on the edge of their seat. I just stare at him with my lips parted as he pulls off the entire training on legal matters without pausing once. He keeps it hella interactive and even gets everyone involved in team activities for better understanding.

After he's done, Parker is glaring at me pretty much the same way Blake was glaring at me in the beginning. I return his glare but feel extremely relieved that Parker's pettiness didn't cost Blake his recommendation.

"That was pretty impressive, Blake." Genesis smiles at him genuinely before turning to me. "I'm impressed at how well the two of you work together."

There's an underlying tone to her voice which makes me frown. Could she possibly know that the person I slept with is Blake? She can't. No one knows. I notice when Eric and Blake get into a conversation as the trainees starts to disperse.

I approach Blake with my heart in my stomach. "Hey?"

"Don't." He snaps immediately.

"Are you seriously that dense?" I snap back at him. "It was Parker! I didn't do shit."

He laughs bitterly, shaking his head as he finally turns to me. It's just the two of us in the conference room now. The way he's looking at me makes me want to sit him down and knock some sense into him.

"Blake, trust me!" I force him to look at me properly without that unsettling glare and he closes his eyes momentarily before opening them. His eyes soften a little.

"I'm sorry." He apologises, his shoulders sagging a little. "I'm just so fucking mad, Emma. That piece of shit. I wish I could punch him."

"You and me both. But please tell me you know that I didn't have anything to do with this. I wouldn't ever do anything to sabotage or hurt you intentionally."

I mean every word. This is also my silent promise against Nick's words from this morning. He thinks I'm planning to hurt him, but really, I am not. I understand his anger right now, he wants someone to blame for something he had been planning for two weeks now.

"Yes, I know. But thank you for saying that." He gives me a small smile. "How terrible did it go?"

"It was amazing." I finally smile at him. "How the hell did you pull that off?"

"Seriously?" He gives me a 'duh' look. "That was literally your entire module. You sent me three samples, that was one of those. I'm sorry that I used it like that."

"Hey." I shake my head. "Don't be ridiculous. I'm just glad you are hardworking enough that you read through each one of it to understand and apply today. I haven't really sent it out yet so just take it as yours, alright?"

"But you designed the entire thing, Emma."

"Yes, and you were supposed to do that. No one can know and I really don't mind. You did a brilliant job on the other one too."

"Are you sure?" He asks and I nod.

"Absolutely."

He grins at me. I'm just relieved that he's not mad or having trust issues. It's a sense of comfort to know that even if his anger deflected him for a while, he still trusts me.

"Want to go to lunch? My treat as a way of thanking you."

"Sure. But there are better ways to thank me, you know?" I smirk at him. "All you have to do is give in."

"Hah, you wish."

Seriously, this game is ridiculous. I don't know about him about not having sex with him is kind of feeling like losing right now. I roll my eyes as we make our way to the desk. He excuses himself so I arrange my desk a bit. I would have to move over to that crowded shitty desk in the middle of the room next week.

"He really did a good job."

I almost jump up from the unexpected voice as I turn to see Genesis standing by my desk.

"Yeah." I nod, trying to ignore the panic that has settled in my heart with her presence.

"It's commendable how he didn't lose his temper on you for screwing up his topic." She smirks a little.

My mind takes a moment to process her words before I look at her in utter shock. "What the fuck? You did that!"

"I was hoping for a dramatic fight in front of everyone." She pouts. "You two really do work together."

Fuck! She knows.