"Danm you messed up bad kenma senpai." "Shoyou did you just curse, you never do that?" "This is a curse worthy conversation- just don't tell Suga, he gets mad when the team talks like that." "Okay... but I don't know how I can tell Kuro, I got all nervous and worried about how he'd react to the truth." "That's how I was too when I told kageyama! Except I mentioned it  when we were talking and then it took a little too long for the both of us to process what I just said. Than I was all flustered and he said he liked me too so it turned out fine."

"Lucky... your crush was for sure homo and single, I had to fall head over heels for a bisexual in a relationship." "I didn't realise he was gay... I thought he was into girls so it made things ackward when I first realised I liked him." "You didn't realise he was gay?! I swear he stared at shirtless guys too much." I was dead laughing and shouyou was questioning his intelligence, he's pretty- not so smart and very blind... but I still love him!

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"Hey kenma, come to my party tommorow!" Huh, what's this?

In front of me I held an invitation from some girl, I don't even know her...

Probably some prank, knowing I was going to throw it out later, I still decided to read it,

Come to Saki's birthday party!!
It will be held on this thursday from 7 pm to 12 at night,
taking place at #########

(Authors note: I'm not creative so the adress is just a bunch of hashtags, it's basically at her house)

"S-saki!?" I looked around to make sure no one had heard me. Kuro must have had her give one to me, for I didn't even know it was her. He never really introduces me to the people he dates, or at least it's very rare. Sometimes their not around long enough for me to even know of their existence.

I wanted to ask Kuro about this but I had to wait until volleyball. In fact I'll ask him after when it's just us.

Now I should probably stop standing here and go to class...

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"Alright, you all did a wonderful job today, except Lev you really need to work on your receiving, usually it's one of the few things you're decent at so I don't know if something's wrong at home but yeah." "something is wrong at home..."

"What was that lev I can't hear you."
"I said som-" "Nobody cares lev."
"ok..." "we can talk about it later." "Thanks yaku-san."

"I'll see you all tommorow, keep up the good work!" He said glaring at lev.

Kuro and I had finished changing and were already outside, I should ask h-

"So are you going to Saki's party. I thought it'd be cool if you met her."

Did he just read my mind? I couldn't even finish my thought, my thought.

"Um, yeah why not..." "Really, you seem upset." "I'm not!" "Yes you are, you play creative mode in minecraft when you're sad." Danm it how did he know that. "Uhh, just family problems..." "Really, like what? Want to talk it out? You know I'm always the-" "Please Kuro just, no."

...

"Ok, sorry I brought it up, I'll pick you up somewhere around six thirty."

I never really responded, I was angry for the worst reason. I was mad at him for thinking it was okay to invite the boy who has a crush on him to his girlfriend's birthday.

Even if he didn't know the boy had a crush on him...

I should have just told him I was busy, than I wouldn't be in this situation of jealousy and worry about anything that'll happen there.

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It was six forty and Kuro had pulled up at my house. I walked to his car and through the window of the backseat, I see Saki.

    He put her in the back...

I got in the passenger seat and just sat in this really awkward position feeling extremely out of place. But I couldn't wipe off the small smile plastered on my face knowing that he saved the passenger seat for not her, but me. Really I don't know why she was in there if it was at her house unless...

Oh god please don't tell me she spent the night at kuro's.

The whole car ride nobody talked. I wasn't mad, I was just kind of...

I guess it was just really ackward.

It only took a couple of minutes but it felt like an eternity with that type of energy. We walked inside and of course, I saw a bunch of crazy drunk teenagers making out, some people were just standing there with a cup in their hand, some were talking to friends, and some were just vibing to the music. The majority were drunk and horny though...

I already got upset. I went and got myself some punch and of course, there was alcohol. I don't even know how I thought it was non alcoholic, it's a party for teens.

I looked behind me and I saw kuro and Saki making out. They felt the need to do it near me so I had to get out of there. I ran and pushed through the crowd to get upstairs. I went into the bathroom, and there's some girl holding her friends hair as she throws up. So I go into what I thought was a bathroom but what turned out to be a bedroom...

     I left the second I heard a noise, guess what it was...

I went back downstairs and behind this couple there was her backdoor. I shoved them out of the way hoping they wouldn't yell at me and of course, they did. I had to be away from everybody
though, there were so many people, I just watched a girl throw up, saw something I really never wanted to, and while standing from a distance, still in the doorway...

     
           I see them. I see the boy I love   running his hands over another girl      until he stops, looks up and sees me.

That's when I finally shut the door.

I just needed a moment to breathe,
and I just needed a place to cry...

Every moment I like to think we have, Every time I think that maybe he likes me too, it was never real, people just need something like this to get kicked back into reality.

I don't really want to go back in, it's actually quite nice out here. The stars are twinkling too, you rarely ever see all of them in the city. Today though, their all dazzling in a beautiful pattern lighting up the infinite darkness. It's a full moon today too... to try to lighten me up as well.

Behind me I heard the door open. "Kenma?" I sniffled from my earlier tears. "hey."  "Kenma are you ok, why are you out here?" "Yeah I'm, I'm-"

"You're obviously not fine, Kenma tell me what happened."  "Nothing, nothing happened." "You're lying, tell me what happened, tell me why you were crying!  "I wasn't crying." "Yes you were now please just tell me why you were crying!" "Can you just shut up kuro."
"Normally I would but I hate seeing you like this so just tell me why you're so upset!"  "I'm upset because I saw you two ok!" "What, what do you mean?"

"I saw you and Saki kissing and your hands were on her ass, and- and she hand her arms around your neck and it was just too much!

"Kenma why is that a problem?" He said stepping closer and tried to almost comfort me.

"Because Kuro I-"

Now this isn't the best situation to finally tell him...

"I..."

It's actually probably the worst

"I like you!"

And there's the change in expression

"No Kuro I don't just like you."

....

"I love you."

And there's the, well known kuro smirk?

He walked over and kissed me, but his hands weren't seductively on my ass, they were hugging me almost in this excited way. And I decided to slowly put my hands on his back. In this comeplete confusion, all I could feel was joy, and warmth as I let the overwhelming amout of love take over me.

And I didn't drown out the rest of the world, because I wanted it there. It was so utterly beautiful and long awaited,

Just like this kiss.

He went back inside and I followed, he told Saki something but I didn't hear what, probably breaking up with her.

We got in his car and drove to his apartment, he carried me bridal style to his room and dropped me on his bed.

"Oh kuro, I love you but I don't want to take it that far." "I wasn't going too, I just want a steamier kiss." "But your eyes say you want to get erotic."

He said nothing, just leaned in and kissed me while I just melted into him.