Luz: Poison is a magic transmutation potion that turns people into corpses.
Amity: This knife is actually a magic wand.
Gus: Meet me in the Denny's parking lot for a wizard duel.
Hunter: *cocks gun* Magic missile.

Willow: What the fuck is wrong with you people.

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Camilla: How petty can you get?

Luz: I once edited a Wikipedia article to win an argument I was wrong about.

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Eda: Did you know you remind me of all 26 letters of the alphabet?

Raine: What? Like J F K W S Q X-

Eda: No, like, U R A Q T.

Raine: Awwww! *blushes*

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Eda, holding a kettle: Coffee or tea?

Hunter: Tea.

Eda: Wrong. It's coffee.

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Luz: When King was born, the gods said, "They're too perfect for this world."

Amity: Please. When they were born, the devil said, "Oh, competition."

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Luz, admiring a sleeping Amity: You're so cute.

Amity, sleepily: I could beat your ass.

Luz, lovingly: I know.

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King : Can we talk? One 10 to another?

Amity: I'm an 11, but continue.

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Hunter: Luz is late again.

Amity: How did this happen? I called them at 8 o'clock this morning and pretended it was 11.

Gus: I printed up a fake schedule for them saying we were starting at 9 instead of noon.

King : I set their clock to say PM when it's really AM.

Hunter: Oh boy. We may have overdone it.

*Luz bursts through the door*

Luz: WHAT TIME IS IT?

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Raine: I've never smoked marijuana. I ate a brownie once at a party. It was intense. It was kind of indescribable. I felt like I was floating. Turns out there was no pot in the brownie. It was just an insanely good brownie.

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