Stan: This should be illegal!

Dipper: It is.

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Stan: Ford, can I ask you a question?

Ford: You just did.

Stan: Okay, can I ask you two questions?

Ford: You just did.

Stan, frustrated: OKAY, CAN I ASK YOU FOUR QUESTIONS?!

Ford: You just did.

Stan: When?!

Ford: Just now.

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*During a game of Hangman*

Mabel: Nope, there's no Q. You lose.

Dipper: Are you kidding me?! You can still add something!

Mabel: I already added a belt, four earrings and an extra arm! YOU LOSE!

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Teacher: So we're gonna read what we wrote down so we can tell everyone in the class something about ourselves.

Stan: Okay, my name is Stan but you can refer to me as Lord Farquad.

Teacher: Okay that's not happening- how about you!

Wendy: I'm Wendy and I like the movie White Chicks!

Teacher: ...Okay... whatever, I respect that.

Soos: My name is Soos and I hate this place, it actually sucks here dudes...

Teacher: Okay... and you...

Dipper: *nervous* Uhhh my name is Dipper and my favorite color is... math.

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Mabel: Twilight Sparkle was the main character because she represented the element of friendship—

Random boy, tied up: PLEASE, I JUST WANT TO SEE MY FAMILY AGAIN!

Mabel: I'M NOT DONE!

Mabel: And Rainbow Dash was the sporty girl—

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Ford: You know what your problem is?

Stan: I only have one?

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Bill: Why won't you all just lie down and die with dignity?!

Ford: We don't do anything with dignity!

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Wendy: I started school with straight A's. Now I'm not even straight.

(Wendy is queer. Change my mind, I dare you)

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Wendy: Nothing feels better than winning Monopoly. Not love, not sex, not free pizza, nothing!

Soos: I'm sorry, have you tried pizza?

Wendy: Yes, and it doesn't compare to owning half the board and watching the light die from your friend's eyes as you take their money and feel your friendship slowly deteriorate.

Dipper: I like you.

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Dipper: Mabel, you've tried 37 times and you've failed every time. Give it a break.

Mabel: DO I HEAR "FIRST TRY PART 38?"

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